孫悟空降至花果山水簾洞，走路搖搖擺擺，全身帶著酒氣。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxlsYDJWB4b
悟空：小的們！我回來啦！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡID2lipA3em
通背猿猴帶著一幫猴子歡呼圍上。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Q89Vt97wE
通背猿猴：大王，你老人家可回來了！你這一去，100多年！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiVemZiZQwc
悟空：啊。你怎麽計算的？我只離開半年。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSjWtyV02pa
通背猿猴：你忘啦，天上一天，地下一年。100多年前，我對你說過。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf3uzEjqmOS
悟空：你半年前這麽說。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡylwBRqQotP
通背猿猴：我100多年前說的。你以後上天，記下天數，寫在紙上。在天數後加個「年」字，這個數字便是地上的年數。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAGi35s8grA
悟空：有別的計算方法嗎？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcI70J7Ep1s
通背猿猴：你用筆，也可以把年先寫上。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS1DaCfvZAw
悟空：天數加年，2個我一塊寫。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV853x8oX4V
通背猿猴：100多年沒見面，我們好想你！55555……（傷感地大哭）83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCgS8O0kM9c
悟空：想我想哭了？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeNb4s9QDW
通背猿猴：嗯。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHCBOhJW6Ed
悟空：額。（吐了一口）83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxnX0w9ixOb
通背猿猴：大王，你怎麽了？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3xTVg9xJQm
悟空：我也想你們！額。（又吐了一口）83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzmDj97FxpD
通背猿猴：哪不舒服？你在吐呢。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJtrtJV2KKa
悟空：沒。是我想你們想的，吐了。（又吐幾口）83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqtJoi9XIxc
通背猿猴：你想我們挺多的！玉帝封你做齊天大聖沒？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAgjjFXFeld
悟空：封了。在天宮舉行的冊封儀式，使我終生難忘。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXekMwKivhW
通背猿猴：大王，描述一下冊封儀式，怎樣？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzi5WSgjH2Q
悟空：不了。我終生難忘的，我知道就行。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡORECnSYv8B
通背猿猴：描述100多年前的事，回憶一下美好時光。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZWJSDXcO1w
悟空：我累了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnmfO8QXSQU
撲騰一聲，孫悟空倒在地上。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG96BHeF37I
通背猿猴：是醉了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOfX91kRvD
天宮。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡls4CDml4Oh
靈霄殿上，玉帝的臥底土地，進見玉帝。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8nlCBiq6aU
土地：陛下，蟠桃園又大又圓的仙桃，都被孫悟空偷吃了！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVG3IMLzWEs
玉帝：啊！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpEsf7DeMjE
一會兒，太上老君進見玉帝。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡykM9byuPP5
太上老君：陛下，我嘔心瀝血煉的九轉金丹，都被孫悟空偷吃了！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLwENDot2Cr
玉帝：啊！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDSJBCB3bW3
又一會兒，王母進見玉帝。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe7ArxMfwfZ
王母：陛下，我準備的蟠桃宴，弄了很多酒菜，都被孫悟空偷吃了！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6IOgOUjJN
玉帝：孫悟空啊孫悟空，你這個吃貨！你敢偷吃我吃的東西？！孫悟空在哪？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwp7CIQSoj
太上老君：天宮的監視鏡顯示，孫悟空已返回花果山。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2IvBRiWGuK
玉帝：誰願下界捉拿吃貨孫悟空？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡERnlYevw0C
托塔天王：我！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCnd2M29lxd
哪咤：我！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7bPN4xSYA5
巨靈神：我！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpgfNQE03Rh
玉帝：天王，又是你們3個。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLy2CJaxMTE
托塔天王：這次可以加幾個。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQfSd4a46I3
玉帝：我給你天兵10萬。記住，這次要給孫悟空一個群毆。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3JiGISgzJB
托塔天王：這麽多人群毆一個，要排隊掛號。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdatz76qF5C
玉帝：不能排隊，不能掛號。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo227IZTvCH
托塔天王：一定做到。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwwPI0H55gc
李托塔、哪咤、巨靈神，帶天兵10萬，一路出師下界。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSznKIe4gMU
路上。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgx5boNAUoc
哪咤：父王，我們10多萬人，怎麽做到群毆一個？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqfSVlPOHqr
托塔天王：簡單。10多萬人停在花果山上空，一起向下扔兵器。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXpQIKxUCI5
巨靈神：太血腥了吧？花果山會血流成河。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcZ0nPdrchQ
托塔天王：下一場大雨沖洗幹凈了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgPw4qcFPml
巨靈神：一場大雨能解決麽？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfEIYcesu7O
托塔天王：我看行。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKKJRcY4VX
巨靈神：我看不行。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJo0ZKFKLC5
托塔天王：不行再下第二場、第三場，直到沖洗幹凈收場！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj6hnyih0Vj
巨靈神：我看也行了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGgn4tgUZZU
這一日，花果山陽光明媚，萬裏無雲。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5PyVyTVgo6
孫悟空正在和眾猴飲酒狂歡。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbyYyqLeDd9
半空中，托塔天王、哪咤、巨靈神出現。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfSYFewxDbV
托塔天王：孫悟空！你偷吃仙桃、偷喝仙酒、偷吃仙丹。玉帝派我將你這個吃貨捉拿歸案！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqpcGAnIzr8
悟空：又來捉我？上次捉我失敗，這次，你有沒有做好心理準備？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwvFTPOpeWN
托塔天王：有。這次準備群毆你。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMjoTliiVEu
悟空：群毆？你們3個？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5UJVVH8kEe
托塔天王：我還有10萬天兵斷後。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJfBF6imjw
悟空：總共10萬多3人？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4Ve4cdJsC
托塔天王：人多也能群毆你！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSazg7zEsAI
悟空：失敗，失敗。我這花果山上上下下，也是10萬人多出3個。這次，只能1對1單挑。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQxk6jXe8RM
托塔天王：啊！是嗎？這可怎麽辦？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5DK2rUq3T
巨靈神：天王，我們按原計劃開戰吧。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmrqv62dqnG
托塔天王：不能！敵我雙方的人數對等，不能群毆。開戰，違抗玉帝旨意。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRV2BEcws70
哪咤：父王，我向玉帝請求支援。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB8xYtKkeIF
托塔天王：快。我先做好群毆準備，圍住花果山。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvrsFw4V9lJ
花果山上空，集聚10萬天兵，遮住太陽，天黑了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1X1V1pspyx
眾猴：大王，我們害怕。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4d3hBDrJ9z
悟空：天黑怕什麽？來人，掌燈。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdn7pfA1OEU
頓時，花果山上萬家燈火。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKsdKzDz15
哪咤返回天宮，在南天門遇見玉帝。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaFGo2WSkxj
玉帝十分關心花果山戰況，正和群臣在南天門觀戰。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFLq4Jz8Fv
哪咤：陛下！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsr6mjjUW00
玉帝：3太子，前方戰事如何？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3p7kdLH2C
哪咤：急需增兵。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0wnU4617eA
玉帝：10萬兵力也不夠？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhZPhwQXKwz
哪咤：孫悟空的兵力也是10萬，不能群毆。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡErSEFRetuI
玉帝：啊！天宮的總兵力只有10萬。諸位仙臣，這可咋辦？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL03kOF08qh
突然，一道霞光閃過，南海觀世音路過。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEpwJruXpH
觀音：諸位好！我們一起參加蟠桃宴會吧？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfykPdwkL0A
王母：蟠桃宴會的飯菜，被下界一個叫孫悟空的猴子偷吃了！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3OmxnkKAir
觀音：陛下，真的麽？求證一下。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKw57bma5Sn
玉帝：真的。我後悔，當初多花錢、多招兵買馬，多好。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaw2bwJqx1p
觀音：孫悟空很厲害麽？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXek8H6uMsS
玉帝：那猴子偷吃仙桃、偷吃仙丹、偷喝仙酒，是一個擁有兵力10萬之多，很厲害的一個吃貨！觀愛卿，你可有法子對付？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7FJmRzRPR
觀音：我推薦一位。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwnf8afg31r
玉帝：直說。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFZ8LqMOPdX
觀音：二郎神。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8IQ5Fwb7e
玉帝：2——郎神？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu6R9hPTTId
觀音：二郎神現居灌江口，享受下方香火，他也是一個吃貨。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG1loboUqcH
玉帝：行麽？聽到2我擔心。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYhVEEJXUUR
觀音：放心。你別忘了，一貨擒一貨。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3iYLmsnu9B
玉帝：他還是2貨吧。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡodiVLogtQk
觀音：二郎神可以一抵萬！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ7pXKQmgdS
玉帝：好！增兵一萬，宣2郎神迎戰孫悟空。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡalWPpfVwvC
哪咤帶著二郎神，見到托塔天王。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSxtE8rH2LT
哪咤：增兵到。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4q86OF3L4k
托塔天王：增兵多少？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKRoCd30Sc7
哪咤：一萬。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHrVCuxmOvh
托塔天王：在哪？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7srtgHahl
二郎神：我。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYvwZf2fkzU
托塔天王：怎麽帶來一個人？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkefFSvhkoW
哪咤：父王，觀音和玉帝都說，他可以以一抵萬。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpDxOeXqqpS
托塔天王：超兵一萬，夠群毆了。天兵聽令，舉起你們手中的兵器，群毆開始。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ93iUEWl6Rs
二郎神：慢。聽說孫悟空和我一樣，都是吃貨。在群毆之前，我想單獨和孫悟空交流一下。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW2OjQOgH9p
托塔天王：你交流快點。手舉著兵器，挺累的。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZW05wwm6jM
相貌清俊、秀氣的二郎神，手拿三尖兩刃槍，步伐輕盈的走在花果山上。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNDR4uUVrzt
眾猴：好帥喔！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaHqFg7qlwR
悟空：帥哥，你哪位？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Z1GIzGSLQ
二郎神：我是號稱以一抵萬的灌江口吃貨……83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxrEQ83zcg
悟空：同吃，同吃。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2oZCQPDSB
二郎神：帥氣稱霸一方，至今還單身、還沒經歷初戀、還是處男的二郎神！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2mGgcIg36
悟空：沒感覺。我男的。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNWKEvD9UCg
二郎神一轉身，不知從那拿出一朵花，含在嘴裏。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFC4PUaQZIG
悟空：說了沒感覺，你擺Pose也沒用。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoJi6MHcDc2
二郎神：知道這是什麽花？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1tyorJsW6E
悟空：鮮花。我這花果山多的是。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtHM30D02E
二郎神：錯！這是一朵只在冬天盛開的梅花。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCUP0jBpgVF
悟空：喔。這種花，花果山可沒有。你那多不多？我打算移植到花果山。等花果山上下雪，我想身臨其境「墻角樹枝美，唯有暗香來」的詩境。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaXmuOOBWEp
二郎神：知道這是什麽神器麽？（手指自己的兵器）83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1QCDhdPPDw
悟空：怪怪的。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvskc9Caxrf
二郎神：這是上古神器——三尖兩刃槍。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQieP2emU9d
悟空：三刃兩尖槍？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbXSU7i2ZL3
二郎神：三尖兩刃槍。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOAG2DEztWY
悟空：幹脆簡稱三尖槍，聽到這麽憋口的武器名字，沒心情和你打了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNdXHVRyFNh
二郎神：誰說和你打？我只想在群毆前，會會你。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeSdKpE9qIp
悟空：多你一個，也看不出群毆的效果。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKMofi6Q2t
二郎神：我可是以一抵萬。多我一個，等於多了一萬人。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOcR4lxQanK
悟空：好吧。這次天宮對我群毆的挑戰，我接受。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIzxYTwZV4n
二郎神：等著群毆吧你！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcwnoZwyVuq
悟空：現在還沒開始，你我先過幾招，預熱一下，咋樣？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOwbZkq1yvt
二郎神：現在10萬人圍著花果山，你不覺得熱嗎？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPehVue2QN
悟空：我有點缺氧。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8MZDfvKTQm
二郎神：同感。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMp4oFnuyN7
孫悟空和二郎神開始做深呼吸。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYyqhrKBca1
悟空：我還沒和處男打過，你和我打一場，破破我的處吧。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHyE5UmK2BM
二郎神：不打。等天上的兵器扔你。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8qz5a1Bs1
悟空：你一個人打敗我，拿個頭等功。知名度一提高，會吸引很多美女。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMXeLLlkb5O
二郎神：開打。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZr9NOmuDyF
兩個人的兵器一碰，三尖槍斷了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHTCc3OJ6y
二郎神：啊！我的神器！55555……（大哭）83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvMAITLw5uU
悟空：什麽神器，不堪一擊。要麽是次品，要麽是膺品，要麽是仿品。不要為它難過了。回家找個不是奸商的鐵匠，重新打造一件。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUPZ74efxPF
二郎神：我的真是上古神器。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBu8YTRLdXT
悟空：是麽？我這根棍子，是上上古的神器，你的材質沒我的好。不要為它難過了。回家買件上上上古的，肯定比我的好。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoGVtSSUdmu
二郎神：我要為我的神器報仇！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK9EtC1lNSR
悟空：你回家買一件再說。過幾天，我約你再戰。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51EmrW0U98
二郎神：我還帶著一件上古神器呢。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpNiYeQFHLg
悟空：留著吧，別斷了再傷心。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8nIKyCOtV2
二郎神把2指頭伸進嘴裏，吹了一聲口哨。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsie31nFCPZ
悟空：這也算神器？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnFcQx6Bpjk
口哨一吹，不知從那冒出一條狗，在孫悟空腿上咬了一口。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOimYCYDfQ0
悟空：疼死我了！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWltIn1kb17
二郎神：哈哈哈。這是我的第二件神器——上古神犬。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3oXK3LmoIi
悟空：有沒有狂犬病？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqFMMbWxpZt
二郎神：不確定。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVpgk0PQ3i
悟空：來人！我要看醫生！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZANrjHpQl
南天門的大門口。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLy4OQ0eQL
觀音：孫悟空被二郎神打傷了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8FXWCCCZzv
玉帝：貌似不是2郎神傷的。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8SG58UQrOu
太上老君：陛下，我可助二郎神一臂之力。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT49MY4FZZ4
玉帝：你也養狗？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVgt2qOAAEL
太上老君：我沒養狗，但我有一個套狗的金剛圈。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYeVTvcJdnV
玉帝：能套猴子嗎？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8aOPqMoy02
太上老君：都是動物，應該可以。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZnxclLoJTn
說著，老君拿出金剛圈，瞄準孫悟空，把金剛圈發射出去。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMI0nuoJxys
孫悟空還在忍痛求救，沒註意天上掉下東西，被金剛圈砸中頭部，暈倒了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2RgNtalrye
二郎神叫來托塔天王，將其繩索捆綁，返回天宮。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4F60zFovlA
孫悟空被天兵押到斬妖臺，玉帝率眾觀斬。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGU5yXycwiI
玉帝：孫悟空，沒想到，你怕狗。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG4ELJF7zh2
悟空：剛才，是誰扔磚砸我頭的？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzkMruRIqqE
太上老君：不是磚，是金剛圈。你恨我吧？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPaEtIMCaWi
悟空：謝謝你！我被你的金剛圈點穴，止住大動脈，控製了狂犬病毒在我體內的擴散。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOOQ9uqSGEB
太上老君：啊。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4HGgCiQq2
悟空：諸位，我被狗咬了。和我保持一定距離，小心狂犬病。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqppCJcAi3z
玉帝：開斬！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSXO3iEaLY8
悟空：等等。我是仙不是妖，不能在斬妖臺斬我。求換地方。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZzSGS6x7ac
玉帝：換什麽地方。把「妖」改成「仙」，筆墨伺候。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLmwwKimrTX
在斬妖仙臺，孫悟空被刀砍斧剁，火燒雷擊。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkSx8P2g3np
悟空：我死了沒有？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrn9Y1pzXIw
玉帝：啊！怎麽還不死？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc0i6deS3Qo
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空偷吃仙界食物，已是金剛之身，殺他的方法不對啊。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZuiNAHc1we
玉帝：咋辦？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡybfgF20WUW
太上老君：把孫悟空放進我的八卦爐，扣緊蓋子，煉上7749天，他化成金水，能煉出金子。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG68wCbcohA
玉帝：太好啦！煉出金子，可以招兵買馬。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSB1uBg8wqw
孫悟空被天兵押到兜率宮。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRV5jjDIiT
太上老君：把孫悟空推進八卦爐。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ82QR3QqL57
悟空：真要把我煉成黃金？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YwOD38uJH
太上老君：玉帝急需用錢。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXIk2woc9e
悟空：這裏有沒有浴池？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeAJjGAo8UC
太上老君：想幹嘛？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ1xuAZtGHV
悟空：我想脫掉衣服，洗洗澡，去趟廁所。可以確保煉出黃金的含金率在99.9999999%以上。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxcMR6xdQRR
太上老君：放心的進去吧！我這爐子煉成的黃金，都是100%的純度。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb16sptPErY
悟空：需要煉我多久？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMts9aRaMnA
太上老君：7749天。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkIwJj0aqNi
悟空：盡量快些。我很想體驗一下，變成黃金的感覺。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeeLYQwquEy
1天，2天，3天………7749天後。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjv2X9kVqZj
太上老君：開爐！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnYnYTte1zI
老君探頭向爐中一看，看到2個圓圓的、閃閃發光的東西。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkk71wRqi1
太上老君：哈哈！孫悟空被煉成金蛋啦！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8sebmopKAQ
說著，伸手去拿金蛋。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdSJb7qG5c8
只聽爐內「哎呀」一聲！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz7MJ1vraRS
爐內：誰插我？誰插我？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp2kvyZLmgI
太上老君：我的金蛋！我的金蛋！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8krv9lf0Oh
爐內：哪個王八蛋插我？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡivobnjE9b5
呼！孫悟空從爐內跳出來。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJh1LBaFpNH
悟空：哪個王八蛋插我眼睛？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvunyqo7bRI
這時，老君才看清楚，發光的2個金蛋，是孫悟空的2只眼睛。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWB4BReg3o4
太上老君：孫悟空，你怎麽還沒死？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfPYLjLoh9
悟空：我也想知道。我怎麽還沒變黃金？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIePZrbtjuL
太上老君：你的眼睛已變成黃金。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ID16FawFc
悟空：多謝了。我的眼睛已經變成火眼金睛！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIeCtBitZPK
太上老君：有什麽了不起。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡekSSaGcH4I
突然，老君的衣服起火。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwLVo5H5TdU
太上老君：啊！孫悟空，不要用你的眼睛看我！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8UgfaHOXm
兜率宮內，孫悟空眼睛看到的地方，急速起火。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7HLOBCHFpY
太上老君極速報知靈霄殿的玉帝。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2yntoREtX
太上老君：陛下，備水！備水！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4tyXRI7H7P
玉帝剛好喝下一口茶，看到老君衣服冒火，嘴裏一噴水，火滅了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk9CM211BV9
玉帝：老君，你煉金小心點。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm6d1BF2BQi
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空從火爐逃出，還煉成一對火眼金睛，看到什麽就使什麽著火！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjnGXtMlfwH
眾仙：啊！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEYqF1bmWjG
玉帝：怕什麽。來人，放狗！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBni9VxqETr
剛說完，孫悟空來了。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbZM810Y7z2
悟空：玉帝，狗在我這。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGGMvXS5xz9
玉帝一看，孫悟空用火眼金睛，正在烤一只狗。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRWAmGI6PER
玉帝：啊！護駕！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwpLSsQQeYp
眾仙神護住玉帝。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1wJwbhmzEk
悟空：別緊張。等會兒大家一起吃燒烤。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxraZh9ODkl
一會兒，靈霄殿上，到處是火。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOwBsAlWU9L
玉帝和太白金星躲在一張桌子下，一杯一杯的不停向身上倒水。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrYcnyo8vK
玉帝：愛卿，快幫朕想想辦法。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzKSE18qhl5
太白金星：陛下，聽說西方雷音寺的主持如來，有一坐騎是一條狗，很厲害。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ01DZmkudfA
玉帝：他哪是啥狗？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7Zj2rKLgK
太白金星：好像叫佛獒。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6i8zymTuF
玉帝：速請西方如來！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS5TPZXaR8d
如來騎著佛獒，從靈山雷音寺趕來。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7zfSGOU2Y
悟空：你哪位？愛吃燒烤嗎？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEZFSR9MqfU
如來：我是西方極樂世界釋迦牟尼尊者，南無阿彌陀佛。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qn7NOMVfB
悟空：歡迎！一只狗不夠吃，你的這條狗，能不能貢獻一下？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPzXcZTQ1jt
如來：孫悟空，狗是人類最好的朋友。很多人反對、反感吃狗肉，你怎麽一點也不愛護動物？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjjzY5QH3rD
悟空：難道你愛護動物？整天騎著狗亂逛，你願意被人騎著亂逛啊？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9QT6FVrNME
如來：額。。。我這條狗名叫佛獒，很兇猛。我騎著它，是防止它咬人。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXFfTe7uTn
悟空：防止咬人還會咬人。吃進肚子，省心看管，絕不咬人。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrb7fpGMC21
如來：我這條狗，可不好吃！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7dgypNovrD
悟空：調料放全，好吃的很。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCdSn5yZ7kN
如來：我先讓你吃一小塊。難吃，你別吃它，留它一條性命。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8h4f0wi3l
悟空：先來一條狗腿。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpTvqF64316
如來：我先給你一只狗掌吧。接著！83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdO0an4a7eo
如來投給孫悟空一只狗掌。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGqwnO8fsd
悟空接住狗掌，發現狗掌上有一串字——唵嘜呢叭嘧吽。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡez46oB3DtW
悟空：你還會微雕？83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHnfL0Qzwbc
突然，狗掌越變越大、越變越大……83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLvVBwvWBgB
悟空：這麽大，我可吃不完。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡni89tRxdSt
狗掌化作金木水火土五座聯山，喚名五行山，墜落在地球，重重的把孫悟空壓住。83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPVlkMLIlhO
83Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAaoORBiT7
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