as you are, not what i want you to be
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2MU1Mb5Bhu
What I love about you isn’t solely based on the perception or impression you give me or the rest of the world.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2oeJFLUlKp
What I love about you are all the reasons why you don’t believe I can love you or that anyone should love you to the depths that I do.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhsUhiiItlB
Your strengths and grace in what you know and are may make you beautiful, but your weaknesses and insecurities make you perfect for me.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg1BRsn1M3Y
When I look into your eyes, I see what other men choose not to see. I accept what other men can’t or won’t accept. Choosing to love you will be the easiest thing I’ll ever do, but losing you will be the hardest feat I’d have to overcome.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡscTwvQqP41
I can’t promise in the future, I won’t harm you. I can’t promise that I’ll always be the perfect man.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ24xg6iNhQ5
What I can promise is to learn from my mistakes, to have patience with you even when I don’t have patience with myself and to trust you with every fiber of my being. We may live to grow old together, we may not.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwyFHOft3A
No matter when, no matter what time we have now I’ve come to realize the paradox I find myself in: It will always be enough and it will never be enough; I will always be blessed as I will always be cursed.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKqx7gDG9qz
Every day that passes makes me joyful because I’m free of the delusion that someone couldn’t love me, when I’m with you I don’t have to hide who I truly am, who I’ve forgotten I could be.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5jTswFXDap
Every day that passes makes me miserable because I know I have fewer days with you than I’d like. If I could have one wish, it would be to go back in time and relive all the moments we’ve shared.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ47gaH8mSNx
The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly because none of the great memories would have ever existed without our struggles. The pain has helped us love harder, appreciate the time we have, and give us the patience to love each other in all our forms.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuNHBHNKUg3
I vow to love you as you are and not stand in the way of who you want to be. I love you, and I vow to love you for the rest of my life, regardless of where this journey takes us.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQm7hotI0Lh
For you, I would do anything and everything, all you have to do is ask.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpV25mmqpoi
Solo
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVXOrC5yqd
I have never been much of a talker, I’m comfortable with blending in the background and letting the rest have their fun.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjRoVDyDaiV
It's hard enough for me to focus and get outside of my head, so being in the present or having a conversation is truly difficult and sometimes feels like an impossible task.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYXKtYMvNRe
Don’t get me wrong, when I speak and join in, it's fulfilling and people tend to be fond of me, but that doesn’t make it any easier to partake in any social environment.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGOLQasuDLN
I thrive in isolation, especially when I get my hands on a project dealing with creativity or using my imagination whether it is to create music, write, digital art, or an invention for random issues that I am ill-equipped to bring to fruition outside of the digital realm and into reality.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEi0VgG9wgu
If I’m not in a constant state of flow, I don’t feel any purpose and shortly begin to lose interest in anything at hand that doesn’t seem productive.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8oCZtha74A
What doesn’t help is that none of my creations have any substance outside of my laptop, it's so much easier to create, save, and then return to it later without committing to more.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlemvBVNKye
All I am is committed to fantasizing about what I feel would make my life better; falling in love with the random girl who stares at me from across the room, waiting for her to smile at me so I can approach while thinking of a hundred different conversations we could have and the best way for me to make a good impression.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWo6yhA0lms
I think about a life with this person; how our worlds would collide and we’d both be better off for it until finances get in the way, my living situation being back home with my parents, my sobriety which will always mean I’m an addict whether I am sober or not.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06TErU4b0h
In minutes I think of everything that could go right, and then everything that could go wrong. I’ve always been in love with falling in love.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGTXHzP2sQd
It's beautiful because love encompasses everything, there’s pain, sorrow, guilt, vanity, and sacrifice, but on the other hand, there is joy, passion, and companionship, that takes dedication, commitment, communication, and choosing to love and be with someone every day, in all of their forms.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMx57wrfKCG
Honesty
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf0L5annePn
None of it matters the finances, the weight, my looks, my intelligence, my job, my mental illness, my routine, etc.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtx84lRxMWx
It’s just all an excuse because I don’t deserve love.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn3IsL6Nsmq
I have vehemently pushed aside good things, good friends, good relationships, especially good women.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjiTCJ7DwfW
I don’t want to feel like I deserve it.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEHdceaFAvf
I don’t want to make the time to actually improve, I just want to live doing the minimal, avoiding as much pain as possible.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8mkVMe3ex3
I don’t have control and I never will. I am sad. I feel lonely, but at this point, this must be what I want.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmGEirg3PM
In any relationship, I refuse to get close unless the other person can provide me with comfort and ease.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNTdqtdoXSH
I’m a narcissist, I only feed off of other people like a leech, a parasite, more like a vampire.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD59EevuRD0
Being sensitive and conforming all the time has become my nature.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwHh9Qb7Lxk
Im not only addicted to Alcohol, Nicotine, and Marijuana.…
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMNC1nuSAin
Im addicted to suffering and draining the people who love me most because I’m not even sure I love them the way they love me.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡum1UyMJrOU
I just don’t try,
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDaySgWqxQN
I don’t want to try. Its easier to be everything, but me. Its less complicated.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgO2LBafSOb
I dont want to be scrutinized because I already know how terrible I am as a human being.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡulj8WPHr2q
I can’t even say I’ve tried hard not be everything I hate. I am extremely intelligent and I limit myself.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHXhEULTwdh
I make unwise choices because when I hate failing.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyYhTzQCQVv
I hate being feeling less. I hate being less, actually I love being less.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9lcdOemFFp
Confusion and complexity is the only thing I strive for which is why I never want to work on myself.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB666X8swpF
I could read an unquantifiable number of books, do drugs, sleep with anyone, fall in love with anyone and it’ll never be enough.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUm0rK8LT5T
I will never be enough for myself and that is why I will never be anything more than what I am today or what I was the day before and I’m not okay with that, but I’m scared. I’m deathly afraid of me, I don’t know if I could even handle knowing the person I have become.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFEoj92sacl
I wish I had the courage to liberate myself instead of always convincing myself to liberate others.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRewJsiGHG5
Fond Of
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡap09H9QBeH
What im fond of..
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGA8XdkH0hT
I am fond of memories, until im not
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4XyEbYdJ9V
I am fond of love, until im not
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2Cdzzs39l
I am fond of fairytales, until im not
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBtH9SoH8WT
I am fond of family, until im not
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHyRzVEgCZG
I am fond of life, until im not
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG87veWWpeN
I am fond of giving, until im not
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0MeOyRmJ9
I am fond of you because this.. I cannot and will not stop
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3JXEAb96dv
Paranoia
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIGX3QQexlQ
Every day, being aware of your thoughts, but not just the act of thinking.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpEH0E1CPuT
Organizing, Rationalizing, and battling the sequence, the line of insecurities, the paranoia, the way I perceive the world around me.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyjO9Qd067h
Its the same assumption, more like accusations every 24 hours:
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXhnOJ37KTC
Are they laughing at me?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Zregk0Qfd
Do they think I’m ugly?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡutKNT9ltEM
Do they laugh because I’m ugly?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlJdRbVMCDt
They must be looking at me because there is something wrong with me.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDNpLjeF0O2
Is there something wrong with me?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqMsbGHVvi
Why do I care? Why do I let myself care?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpw2eSCgUvo
Is she looking at me?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdOHHSXCecj
I wish she would look at me.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBFSyKKXrKS
Why isn’t she interested?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmPyGMZD3EN
Do I even want her to be interested?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWI1Q4Qpow
Its better if she isn’t.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC280DTtcFq
Im not in the right head space, financial stability, patience, looks, or the fact I’m not interesting enough.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq1DtkiP2oR
Am I enough?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQu7KKguWVH
Will I ever be enough?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd5x7pqkN9a
If I eat this am I going to be fat?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2eyHebczkB
Am I going to be even more unattractive?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxSZBW6l55X
If I don’t pray, if I don’t show gratitude, if I don’t give mercy to others, how can I expect it from God?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnrgttcWjPA
Does god even want to hear from me?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxHtTXzjfHZ
I don’t want to pray because Im tired and it feels like a waste of my time.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi97kLfDxWU
When I do speak to God, does he take the time to listen when I have doubts, practically have zero faith?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlbf0DowqYv
Am I just a loser who lives at home with Mom and Rick? Are they helping me or am I just manipulating them?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡadJsi6DUKf
Love Her
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCbbGziJpPY
How can I begin to liberate myself from this burden of loops consisting of only what ifs?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeeTUQPaosM
Some days I think about you until dawn.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyDYtw4Yz92
Most days now, I am restless.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ76g9vdtyvK
Producing, then digesting mountains of fantasies hoping theirs a side of you that sees what I do.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKVgOAAGAN7
Still, we repel and with each passing moment, I bleed.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUgHfDboYPF
I lose all sense of consciousness and am yours.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkfT8NdpEL
Am I fool or a hopeless romantic?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0fsHh8PXC
Is there a clear distinction between the two?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwNwPMEWRcs
I find myself treading along a silver lining.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAwp3q78uM
She believes she’s lead by kismet, but how can that be with a leash around its neck?
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHJEugUcozM
This path she walks erodes her.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEopM2m57aa
It erodes me.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKIswdNx32
I feel it on her skin when we touch.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdtLyEGpZzc
Spiraling
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE6JwJ1e3Bj
I am losing my mind all over again and I’m afraid of what can and will happen next.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZjcuDfWxV
There is so much that I need, but I think they are just things I want which is a huge difference.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqjzkwoKosH
Its not a bad to want something, but to cling onto it as if it’ll fix everything, or the key to my happiness is where I fall short.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzvMwDwRqxv
I keep on focusing on the outside, external factor that are the issue, but I don’t attempt to fix the broken pieces inside of me.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnrJxnZIXVB
I need to be validate in everything I do, or else I’ll never be good enough.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6w6Bxmt9sc
There is a wickedness inside of me that I feed.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0LLkpXFoeb
I believe in all the negative and rarely the positive.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN8X3FrTBjO
I am getting much better and more mindful about the decisions and life choices im making, but that doesn’t mean I’m okay.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbMQncMVNyX
Because im not. I’m not okay.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyWwqZfInzC
I dont want to with anyone because im scared of being rejected.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2tMBLsABb
Im scared of getting close to someone else and not pulling through or giving them too much of me.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡphBqKXMerV
I know that if I got to that point and something bad happens like a break up, too many fights, different life plans/future, I’d be utterly devastated.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwJ4CJ27Sg
I can barely hold myself together as is.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDgabqrykmY
I wake up in the morning when I wish I could be dreaming.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNvjVEjINVf
I go downstairs and make myself an awesome smoothie with strawberries, bananas, cinnamon sugar almond butter oats and some milk.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJb8UAczsSu
Its really fucking good.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgFidpp05D
I watch tv for about an hour or less, take my medicine and then head to the gym.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoH3rn6BGH5
I park my car closer to the bank which is further away from Planet Fitness because I like walking the distance.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3THUdb1MN
I enter the gym, swipe my barcode with my membership and ask for 20 minutes on the Hydromassage.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXeNRjLAVzQ
After I go stretch for 10 to 15 minutes, lift for another 20 to 30 minutes, then walk for an hour while reading my books.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4f320uVe64
I get to read like 30 pages which I really enjoy, but lately its all felt monotonous, I am struggling to do the things that I used to really enjoy.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTqILzHIfO
I stretch for another 10 to 15 minutes or hit the hydromassage for another 10 minutes.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFQPZf0Rtzd
This is when I leave and head back home.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSlJS0GHDT2
Going back home I look forward to eating, sometimes showering, making myself eggs , drinking some protein powder (double chocolate).
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRvRJqjG4O1
I sit to watch something on Netflix, Hulu, Prime or YouTube while promoting my music.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyv5kFGtVc
Sometimes Ill make music, sometimes, Ill write a story or create some digital art.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnF032uYgqu
Lately, I’ve been getting into rom coms and feel good movies to distract myself.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiCXzn8yLTG
I want to be convinced that something good lies ahead.
271Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUy7ItYbvi3
I want to believe that something real and tangible is going to happen.
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