Alex couldn’t believe anything, she had a half sister. Her own father was out to get her, he was insane. She was scared to death. She had shifted positions too many times to keep count, yet she couldn’t fall asleep, taking the term falling asleep with one eye open too seriously, or just staying awake in general.
“What do I do now?” She asked that small little voice in her head, she didn’t know what she was doing. She needed Elijah, she wanted- no she needed him to be alive. He had always been there, and she needed him right now. She was going to do everything to prove him innocent, and to save Alice. Even though she never got to meet her, she knew she was a good person. That all of this was because they wanted to run away, and Aaron didn’t let them. Because he knew every single detail of their escape, he planned to ruin things. And he did, he took away two beings that brought meaning to Westmore. She rolled one more time, and groaned. She punched her pillow, and screamed into it. She was so annoyed, it was contagious.
“What’s peace and understanding going to do, huh? Answer me. What is it going to do?”
A notification popped up on her phone, she picked it up. And blinked as it read.
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What’s peace and understanding going to do?
That’s easy… It won’t do anything, it’ll give you fake,
hope, so don’t even try.
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What? She tilted her head, and realized Aaron sent it. He knew things, he was there watching her now. Like a predator, looking at prey. But this was beast against beast.
Not beauty and the beast. Although it was a great movie, that isn’t the damn point. She shook her head, and started typing. Asking who he was, he answered with the shittiest answer.
And then a call.
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“What do you want, Aaron?”
“I’d prefer you call me ‘dad’. Suits better since I am your father. Anyway, I just wanted to see how my girl is doing. Wondering if you’re now a little scared, because you do know what bad daughters get right?” He asked, his voice changing to mock menacing. She rolled her eyes.
“They get called out, and said that they’re such a bad daughter, and then their parents act as if they’re the best parents in the world, and they don’t realize how fucked up, and depressed their own child gets, and they have mental issues, and a lot of other crap? Always called a failure, when they never get credit for anything? Is that what they get?” She snapped, as he let out a bitter laugh on the other side.
“Listen, don’t talk to your father like that. And no, they don’t get that. They get a punishment, and since I’m so generous, I could give you one: a slit on your throat, or two: a pretty little grave. You choose, darling. It’s one or the other, and both require something sharp.” That emphasis made a little shiver go down her spine, and she blinked.
“What kind of dad are you?”
“A good one, and you're good for nothing. So why have a useless daughter? With a useless mother? When both of you, or actually… Let’s see, Charlie, Margaret– When the four of you are useless? Now that would be such a waste of space on Earth wouldn’t you agree? I can say bye-bye faster than you can scream for help. So.. Go on choose. One or two?” He asked, a small scraping sound in the background of his side. Metal against metal, just like when someone sharpens a knife.
“I choose three: your death, Elijah’s innocence, and your blood. So, you can die, and we don’t need your shitty existence on the planet. So I pick three. Sorry not sorry, Aaron. Now if you excuse me, I’m hanging up now, and I will get you. Daughter against father, sounds amusing, yet satisfying. Now good bye.” She hung up before he could say anything else, throwing her phone on the nightstand. She would wake up in a few hours, and eat breakfast, then would go to Andrew’s and ask him if he could go with her and sneak into the school. That was her plan for today.
Hours felt like years, at least she slept a bit.
“Hey, rascal, wake up. Mom is making pancakes.” Max said, shaking her shoulder. Alex groaned, and opened her eyes, looking up at Max’s familiar face. He dragged her up, as she groaned louder, why did they have to wake her up so early?
“Ugh fine, I’m coming, I’m coming.” She whined groggily, and stood up. Max smiled, and walked downstairs, making the loud creak of the fifth step fill the house. Alex covered her ears a bit, as she went to change into sweatpants. She stretched, and went downstairs, skipping over the fifth step, and smelled the familiar scent of her mom’s famous pancakes.
“Good morning, sweetheart. Sit down, the food is almost ready.” She said, as Alex sat at the kitchen island chair next to Max as he chewed on some raspberries their mom had left out.
“How’d you sleep?” He asked, mid swallow. Alex shrugged, and yawned.
“Hm, how did I sleep? Well, I laid down, grabbed my blanket, and closed my eyes. Counted sheep, and fell asleep. That’s how I slept.” She joked, he rolled his eyes.
“Oh wow, so funny. You’re such a little brat. Anyway, you wanna know how I slept? I slept laying down, and thinking about this really pretty girl I saw the other day at the book store. Anyway, I slept great.” He said, as their mom placed the plates in front of them. They both thanked her, and started eating.
“Oh, mom. Uh, I’m going to Andrew’s later. I have to talk to him about something really important. And it has to be today.” She said.
“Yes of course, just promise me you won’t go off again. You don’t want your mother to have a heart attack again. Just be safe, pumpkin.” Her mom replied, wiping down the counter. Alex got up, and placed her plate in the sink. Smiling at her mom, trying not to let any distant emotion betray her calm facade. A mask she’d soon take off, too soon…
“Anyway, I’ll go for a walk. For fresh air, I might stop by Isabell’s.”
“Wait! Here… Grocery money, I’ll send you the list. Don’t forget this time.” Her mom said. Alex nodded, and hurried up stairs, and changed into black leggings, and a red shirt, putting her sneakers on. Grabbed her bag, tied her hair in a loose bun and went back down, a double journey since she forgot her phone and back down. Saying good-bye to Max, and her mom and heading out. It was chilly but it didn’t really bother her, she walked down three houses until she reached the familiar brick house, with two cars in the drive. The same tree in the yard, and flowers around it. Alex walked up the drive, to the front porch, and rang the doorbell. A small meow coming from inside, Isabel’s cat Loki appeared in the cat flap, Alex smiled and crouched down scratching its head.
“Loki- Oh there you are you sneaky little thing. Oh hey Alex.. Didn’t know you were gonna come over.” Isabell said. Loki meowed again, and walked back inside. Alex stood back up, and fixed her hair.
“Yeah, uhm. Just wanted to see how you were doing.” She said. Isabell shrugged, as she started talking about her week, how some family drama had happened last night. How her parents found out she had a girlfriend, and were against it. Alex nodded occasionally, subtly looking around as if scared Aaron would pop out and snatch her away like he did last night. She checked the time, and nodded once again.
“But yeah, how have you been?”
“Oh the same. Project, project, and project. I’m going to Andrew’s later, so yeah. I better get going, I have to go for groceries too. See you on Monday Isabell.”
She waved, and walked back down the porch stairs, and down the drive to the sidewalk. Isabell waved, and watched as Alex disappeared into the distance. She kept walking, eyes fixated on the concrete, on the way her converse moved. How her left foot, or right foot seemed to wash away with every step she took. Each step was a second, seconds that were slipping away from her in this dumb little game. Something cold landed on her hand, and another. She looked up, snow. That was weird, the snow always started in November. Maybe the news was right, this year will be the snowiest year yet. Great she didn’t even have her hoodie on, but it’s fine snow wasn’t so bad. It was pretty in some way or another. She kept walking, minuscular snowflakes falling onto her hair, she kept walking, reaching Andrew’s house. She wouldn’t bother right now about the groceries, she needed to tell Andrew about the recording now or she would forget about everything.
She walked up to the door, knocking it softly waiting for someone to open it.
The door opened, with Mr. Song in the doorway.
“Ah, hello. What brings you here- Oh look it’s snowing, come in come in. Can't have you getting a cold can we?” He said, Alex smiled slightly, stepping in and taking off her shoes. She hadn’t been in here in ages, it felt unreal. Christi, Andrew’s mom peeked from the kitchen, and smiled. Turning off the stove, and hugging her immediately.
“Alexandra, how are you doing? What brings you here?” She said.
She smiled at Christi, looking as Andrew walked downstairs upon hearing Alex’s name, as if he had been summoned. He smiled softly, and went to hug her.
“Hey there, tater-tot.”
He looked over at his parents who were trying to suppress their smiles, he cleared his throat looking down at Alex who rolled her eyes subtly smiling.
“I have to talk to you about something.” She whispered, he blinked but nodded. Telling his parents they were going upstairs, and going into his room. Alex sat on his bed, her eyes always going to that same spot in every ceiling no matter where.
Top right corner.
Andrew came over and sat next to her. Hand going under her thigh like it always did. He tilted his head at her, and she sighed.
“You look bothered. Is everything OK?” He asked, his brow furrowing.
“Yeah, everything is fine. But we need to sneak into the school today. Now.”
He blinked, processing her words. She knew this was stupid, she knew they could end up in trouble if caught. But they had to do this, he had to know about the recording, about their plan. If anything went wrong, everything would get lost. And she would die.
“Sure, yeah. OK. How are we doing it?”
“Wait, you're actually on board with it?”
“Of course I am… What’s ketchup without tater-tots? That would just be absurd”
Alex raised a brow, looking at him unamused crossing her arms. He shrugged.
“What? I’m hungry, besides you’re the tater-tot, I’m the ketchup. It suits us. Team tater-tot, and ketchup against the world. Bum bum bum.” He said in a sing-song voice. . She scoffed, shaking her head. He truly was something, but she loved him. Alex looked up at him.
“OK fine. But we need a plan.” She said, looking down at the floor.
He nods, his eyes go to that same spot Alex’s eyes would always go to.
Top right corner.
The custodians always stayed during the weekends to clean the school, keep it maintained so it would be fine for when they all went back. She knew that if they were caught everything would go to waste.
“OK, so when we get there. We’ll sneak in through the back, we have to be careful not to make sudden moves. We can’t make any noise, nor get caught. Keep your ears and eyes open. I know exactly where we’re going once we’re inside. So just follow me.”
“No making noise, no sudden moves, ears and eyes open. Got it. And just follow you. Alright, OK. So when do we go?”
“Change, and we’ll say we’re going on a walk.”
He nods, and starts changing, Alex checks her bag checking if she had everything. Andrew turned around, and smiled. Wearing black, and a red beanie.
“What are you wearing?”
“My sneaking-into-school-on-a-random-Saturday-morning outfit, duh,” he said, doing a spin. “I’m a very fabulous being when sneaking in with my girlfriend. What else am I supposed to wear?” He said, Alex just rolled her eyes.
“You weird diva I swear.” She stood up, he shrugged and grabbed his phone.
“You love it, admit it.” He mumbled. She scoffed, walking out his room down the stairs. He smiled, and followed behind her. His parents peaked from the living room.
“Where are you two love birds going?” Christi asked.
“Just going on a walk.”
She nodded, and waved goo-bye, as they walked out the front door towards the school walking past the Cortezes’.
“Wow, their house seems so quiet nowadays.” Andrew whispered, as Alex nodded trying not to look at the house. Her eyes stayed on the sidewalk, knowing what really happened to Alice. And what would happen to herself if this wasn’t resolved quickly, what her dad would do to her.
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“Let’s just keep going. That’s not important right now.” She managed to get out through the lump forming in her throat, all the way down to her stomach. She knew this feeling. Probably wouldn’t have known what it meant at the beginning of all of this. But she knew now.
The feeling of anxiety, uncertainty, fear. That’s what she had now. All that at the pit of her stomach, all the way to the base of her throat. She wished she could just throw it all up, forget about it, But she knew it was no use, it would never be of use.
“Right, yeah. Keep going.” Andrew replied, catching up to Alex and her desperate walk. She held onto the strap of her bag, her hand burning to the touch. But she didn’t mind the pain, she wouldn’t mind it. It stuck with her now, so much has happened in the span of three months. So much, so so much. And she couldn’t bear it all herself, but she would never give her pain to anyone. All that weight on her shoulders, all that she has discovered.
A sixteen year old girl. Seventeen next month.
Too innocent at the beginning, not knowing what it would come to.
Eight years ago, on that living room floor watching the TV with its bright colors illuminating the room. Her mom and Elijah’s parents talking in the background. The news report.
Alice Cortez, murdered by her best friend and secret boyfriend. Elijah Song. October 15th of 2002.
It had been there from that moment, she just didn’t know it yet.
On that living room floor, it had all started.
Battle between beast and beast. For the balance between life and death.
Alexandra and Aaron.
Father and daughter.
Only to know that eight years later, she would have been looking into this. Bringing hidden secrets to life. Knowing about the perfect lies of her father.
Perfect lies.
How she hated that. Perfect constructed lies, that passed as the truth.
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“We’re here.” Andrew said, snapping Alex back into the cruel reality. She looked up, the school just a few feet away. She let go of the strap, the small valley gap between her thumb and index finger red and marked. She walked through the grass, and went around to the back. Just like the plan, sneak in through the back.
“OK…. Good, the custodians left the back door open.” She said, gesturing to the metal door slightly open. Andrew nodded, and walked over to it. They peeked through the gap, looking if the coast was clear. She opened it slightly, thankful that it didn’t creak
.
“So why are we sneaking into the school again?”
“I need to show you something. But you have to be quiet, c’mon.”
They walked slowly through the hallway, feeling unwelcome in this low lighted building. Where it was usually bright, and buzzing with students everywhere. They continued walking, slowly going to the back side of the school. Where that hidden secret lay. That recording could change how people looked at it, if only her fantasies came true. This wouldn’t happen. If only nothing of this happened, if only all this was just a big dream.
“OK, watch your step.” She whispered as they walked over the yellow strips. Andrew nearly fell, but composed himself. He looked down at the backpack Alex had left on the ground. He walked over to it, crouching down.
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“Hey, look. This is Elijah’s backpack. What the hell is it doing here?” He asked, opening it and looking inside. She walked over to him, looking down.
“I actually don’t know. The first time I was here, I just left it there. Although, a book should be in there.” Andrew pulled out the same book Alex had, he looked up at her as she nodded at him. He gave a small nod, and placed it back inside, standing up straight.
Alex walked around the water, and into the same empty, abandoned classroom. That same beeping sound in the distance getting louder as they got closer. He would finally be able to know about his brother, what he was going to do.
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To save himself, just like she was going to save herself.
He wanted to save Alice, and the cruelty of this town. Of everything they went through, just for some time. But for them time did exist, for Alex and Andrew. Time was nothing but invisible.
Maybe in another life, maybe in another life nothing of this would have happened. In another life, she would be free. Happy, innocent. That lump in her throat wouldn’t be there, that horrible, horrible feeling in her stomach wouldn’t exist. Yet here she was, with Andrew sneaking into school into a banned place that they shouldn’t even be in.
“What’s that sound?” Andrew whispered, staying close to Alex.
“You’ll see.”
She walked over to the cord, and plugged it in. Static. She pulled over the chair, and pulled a chair for Andrew. He sat down, as she played with the buttons until the static sound was gone. He blinked as he heard Elijah’s voice, and Alice’s voice.
As the recording came to an end, Andrew looked at Alex. Blinking. That same look Alex had the first time she heard it. The first time she heard what would happen, the truth behind the lie.
Confusion.
That’s what was etched on his face, confusion and that small hint of
What if.
She knew it all too well, that lump getting heavier and heavier with each passing second. She wanted to throw up, to leave it all behind. But she swallowed it all back in, never to let it out. She couldn’t let it out, because that would only make her seem weak. And that big lump, that weight she had was the only thing making her strong. The only thing that is keeping her from giving up. If she lived, then maybe just maybe that weight would be gone. Never to exist. But if she died, she would carry that burden to her after life, and more.
“What the hell?” Andrew mumbled under his breath.
“Yeah..?”
“Damn.”
This could change the course of everything, of what everyone believed in. If they were able to somehow make people believe them. To make them see that they’ve been wrong all along. But even if they tried, no one would believe them.
There she goes again, repeating and repeating things over and over and over again in her head. Like a big circle, a huge infinity sign in her head. She unplugged the cord, making its head fall to the floor. Andrew ran a hair through his dark hair, looking at the dusty floor. His eyes drifted to hers, a silent conversation happening between them. And she knew what it meant. That conversation without words, because words weren’t important at a time like this. They never were. Not now, not never and if they never spoke then no one would never know of this moment. Of this hidden moment coming to life.
“We should go now. I think we should show this to Detective Lee.” He said, standing up. She blinked, and stood up as well. They would go to the hellhole, the horrible, horrible place. What if she didn’t believe them, she was overthinking.
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“Alex?”
She looked up.
“Right, yeah let’s go.”
They walked out, and not the biggest part of her war was coming to pass.
They walked down the empty hall, and out the door nearly getting caught. Finally into the sunlight outside, she covered her eyes as she remembered it was snowing. But she didn’t mind, all she cared about was this whole thing now.
Time was ticking. Faster than anything.
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