as you are, not what i want you to be
740Please respect copyright.PENANA6EflVHUpoQ
What I love about you isn’t solely based on the perception or impression you give me or the rest of the world.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAQhoo04shbb
What I love about you are all the reasons why you don’t believe I can love you or that anyone should love you to the depths that I do.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAWIWokSBlHH
Your strengths and grace in what you know and are may make you beautiful, but your weaknesses and insecurities make you perfect for me.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAywvEYgvUh5
When I look into your eyes, I see what other men choose not to see. I accept what other men can’t or won’t accept. Choosing to love you will be the easiest thing I’ll ever do, but losing you will be the hardest feat I’d have to overcome.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAhwBKvsIKEF
I can’t promise in the future, I won’t harm you. I can’t promise that I’ll always be the perfect man.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAAXnjjSYXyE
What I can promise is to learn from my mistakes, to have patience with you even when I don’t have patience with myself and to trust you with every fiber of my being. We may live to grow old together, we may not.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAV0DWV4dWnm
No matter when, no matter what time we have now I’ve come to realize the paradox I find myself in: It will always be enough and it will never be enough; I will always be blessed as I will always be cursed.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAdAJj8oQkxB
Every day that passes makes me joyful because I’m free of the delusion that someone couldn’t love me, when I’m with you I don’t have to hide who I truly am, who I’ve forgotten I could be.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAz0YIlhjM8C
Every day that passes makes me miserable because I know I have fewer days with you than I’d like. If I could have one wish, it would be to go back in time and relive all the moments we’ve shared.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA4eOn0X7jMG
The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly because none of the great memories would have ever existed without our struggles. The pain has helped us love harder, appreciate the time we have, and give us the patience to love each other in all our forms.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA55PwpCUTVD
I vow to love you as you are and not stand in the way of who you want to be. I love you, and I vow to love you for the rest of my life, regardless of where this journey takes us.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAOcmEFW6DU5
For you, I would do anything and everything, all you have to do is ask.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAjjghlVxUB4
Solo
740Please respect copyright.PENANAiql8zVqGhT
I have never been much of a talker, I’m comfortable with blending in the background and letting the rest have their fun.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAlg7jNcWhCj
It's hard enough for me to focus and get outside of my head, so being in the present or having a conversation is truly difficult and sometimes feels like an impossible task.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAoZKrFE9HCs
Don’t get me wrong, when I speak and join in, it's fulfilling and people tend to be fond of me, but that doesn’t make it any easier to partake in any social environment.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAckVVrNCdvr
I thrive in isolation, especially when I get my hands on a project dealing with creativity or using my imagination whether it is to create music, write, digital art, or an invention for random issues that I am ill-equipped to bring to fruition outside of the digital realm and into reality.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAbfAFyf8KpA
If I’m not in a constant state of flow, I don’t feel any purpose and shortly begin to lose interest in anything at hand that doesn’t seem productive.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAu1hbE6819E
What doesn’t help is that none of my creations have any substance outside of my laptop, it's so much easier to create, save, and then return to it later without committing to more.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAksvC2uZu7B
All I am is committed to fantasizing about what I feel would make my life better; falling in love with the random girl who stares at me from across the room, waiting for her to smile at me so I can approach while thinking of a hundred different conversations we could have and the best way for me to make a good impression.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAVOSq3l1xCF
I think about a life with this person; how our worlds would collide and we’d both be better off for it until finances get in the way, my living situation being back home with my parents, my sobriety which will always mean I’m an addict whether I am sober or not.
740Please respect copyright.PENANApbHe6yG0sP
In minutes I think of everything that could go right, and then everything that could go wrong. I’ve always been in love with falling in love.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAwlSt17TjLZ
It's beautiful because love encompasses everything, there’s pain, sorrow, guilt, vanity, and sacrifice, but on the other hand, there is joy, passion, and companionship, that takes dedication, commitment, communication, and choosing to love and be with someone every day, in all of their forms.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAbXfb05sLWo
Honesty
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None of it matters the finances, the weight, my looks, my intelligence, my job, my mental illness, my routine, etc.
740Please respect copyright.PENANALA9VEdG61M
It’s just all an excuse because I don’t deserve love.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAXhq8TIUxTp
I have vehemently pushed aside good things, good friends, good relationships, especially good women.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAV1wgWMfnMg
I don’t want to feel like I deserve it.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAIhpsgob8wh
I don’t want to make the time to actually improve, I just want to live doing the minimal, avoiding as much pain as possible.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA2pBUjd9BZr
I don’t have control and I never will. I am sad. I feel lonely, but at this point, this must be what I want.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAztDha8CSTH
In any relationship, I refuse to get close unless the other person can provide me with comfort and ease.
740Please respect copyright.PENANARJLjpypgxk
I’m a narcissist, I only feed off of other people like a leech, a parasite, more like a vampire.
740Please respect copyright.PENANARIOfZjHNph
Being sensitive and conforming all the time has become my nature.
740Please respect copyright.PENANATbHE7HOd05
Im not only addicted to Alcohol, Nicotine, and Marijuana.…
740Please respect copyright.PENANAZEtCYrDvHr
Im addicted to suffering and draining the people who love me most because I’m not even sure I love them the way they love me.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAHpgUY1x9Pm
I just don’t try,
740Please respect copyright.PENANAlFGthYOXHZ
I don’t want to try. Its easier to be everything, but me. Its less complicated.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAtblqHHxFon
I dont want to be scrutinized because I already know how terrible I am as a human being.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA9UgYCZOBn9
I can’t even say I’ve tried hard not be everything I hate. I am extremely intelligent and I limit myself.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAHcdKUzKQxD
I make unwise choices because when I hate failing.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAgWHGqgclPW
I hate being feeling less. I hate being less, actually I love being less.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA9A1tz9paoW
Confusion and complexity is the only thing I strive for which is why I never want to work on myself.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA8dFPm5Lc7e
I could read an unquantifiable number of books, do drugs, sleep with anyone, fall in love with anyone and it’ll never be enough.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAUuJobVGGOS
I will never be enough for myself and that is why I will never be anything more than what I am today or what I was the day before and I’m not okay with that, but I’m scared. I’m deathly afraid of me, I don’t know if I could even handle knowing the person I have become.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA2agaNVdPZa
I wish I had the courage to liberate myself instead of always convincing myself to liberate others.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA3Cg9PwAPbi
Fond Of
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What im fond of..
740Please respect copyright.PENANAt3Ng6K6xQJ
I am fond of memories, until im not
740Please respect copyright.PENANAy7AhYreGRW
I am fond of love, until im not
740Please respect copyright.PENANAF81NlsoI9B
I am fond of fairytales, until im not
740Please respect copyright.PENANAaZEFPSlskj
I am fond of family, until im not
740Please respect copyright.PENANA6JhiQiKeYU
I am fond of life, until im not
740Please respect copyright.PENANAKp8aIZvLlV
I am fond of giving, until im not
740Please respect copyright.PENANA7B40FUt42x
I am fond of you because this.. I cannot and will not stop
740Please respect copyright.PENANALLQAa0xZuZ
Paranoia
740Please respect copyright.PENANA6KEgniEFa1
Every day, being aware of your thoughts, but not just the act of thinking.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAt9EGKXVKp9
Organizing, Rationalizing, and battling the sequence, the line of insecurities, the paranoia, the way I perceive the world around me.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAW58fMYMfoG
Its the same assumption, more like accusations every 24 hours:
740Please respect copyright.PENANAAq93MRm0yF
Are they laughing at me?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAtrn1D5rJBO
Do they think I’m ugly?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAcjR9HyTtu9
Do they laugh because I’m ugly?
740Please respect copyright.PENANANhNyI7TLiB
They must be looking at me because there is something wrong with me.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAs7bLlerrY4
Is there something wrong with me?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAbiKrkaUFEq
Why do I care? Why do I let myself care?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAaAbyXq6Ask
Is she looking at me?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAJSjRWIfVra
I wish she would look at me.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAg2Uh9KRUBF
Why isn’t she interested?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAYMF3x6HeRl
Do I even want her to be interested?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAUZWUjC4MiP
Its better if she isn’t.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAQAL5P3JWdT
Im not in the right head space, financial stability, patience, looks, or the fact I’m not interesting enough.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAbAxFAnkvnZ
Am I enough?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAd8zvTyCLgZ
Will I ever be enough?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAmSatMmjUgI
If I eat this am I going to be fat?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAOgIKA2vgRd
Am I going to be even more unattractive?
740Please respect copyright.PENANA5CoWfFiF8s
If I don’t pray, if I don’t show gratitude, if I don’t give mercy to others, how can I expect it from God?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAM4obTXEjl7
Does god even want to hear from me?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAHbk21NovG7
I don’t want to pray because Im tired and it feels like a waste of my time.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA8M9fiUr8Eh
When I do speak to God, does he take the time to listen when I have doubts, practically have zero faith?
740Please respect copyright.PENANA5EpG4CD8bW
Am I just a loser who lives at home with Mom and Rick? Are they helping me or am I just manipulating them?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAD2lRuzvrHL
Love Her
740Please respect copyright.PENANAltuLKcNBDr
How can I begin to liberate myself from this burden of loops consisting of only what ifs?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAP44Eo1N6rH
Some days I think about you until dawn.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA4EwOTxawdr
Most days now, I am restless.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA8cpUI0ESzJ
Producing, then digesting mountains of fantasies hoping theirs a side of you that sees what I do.
740Please respect copyright.PENANASelUrrC3V5
Still, we repel and with each passing moment, I bleed.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAR9756mjTob
I lose all sense of consciousness and am yours.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAk4XvTVLyWW
Am I fool or a hopeless romantic?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAeDiHb7oGtd
Is there a clear distinction between the two?
740Please respect copyright.PENANA2JdlzVJeBV
I find myself treading along a silver lining.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAwYZ2UrGGqm
She believes she’s lead by kismet, but how can that be with a leash around its neck?
740Please respect copyright.PENANAAmEV67K5V3
This path she walks erodes her.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAzXSH7ek7Pr
It erodes me.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAKV72ftdur7
I feel it on her skin when we touch.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAsIlWIXFtha
Spiraling
740Please respect copyright.PENANATFR34cPUol
I am losing my mind all over again and I’m afraid of what can and will happen next.
740Please respect copyright.PENANADbc95mxyA8
There is so much that I need, but I think they are just things I want which is a huge difference.
740Please respect copyright.PENANABjWvj0HG2W
Its not a bad to want something, but to cling onto it as if it’ll fix everything, or the key to my happiness is where I fall short.
740Please respect copyright.PENANANYKfjhNQit
I keep on focusing on the outside, external factor that are the issue, but I don’t attempt to fix the broken pieces inside of me.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAhxrFpICkY3
I need to be validate in everything I do, or else I’ll never be good enough.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAyn77sP3wBn
There is a wickedness inside of me that I feed.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAoso236d9mj
I believe in all the negative and rarely the positive.
740Please respect copyright.PENANALDgOq0OclK
I am getting much better and more mindful about the decisions and life choices im making, but that doesn’t mean I’m okay.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAztOsT1poAm
Because im not. I’m not okay.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAE4IPFah1xc
I dont want to with anyone because im scared of being rejected.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAmOBle8SoyQ
Im scared of getting close to someone else and not pulling through or giving them too much of me.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAJBSl0S39Rn
I know that if I got to that point and something bad happens like a break up, too many fights, different life plans/future, I’d be utterly devastated.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAPxes6sN1Qq
I can barely hold myself together as is.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAswZP5f4SSP
I wake up in the morning when I wish I could be dreaming.
740Please respect copyright.PENANACMESMEjnHp
I go downstairs and make myself an awesome smoothie with strawberries, bananas, cinnamon sugar almond butter oats and some milk.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAEwanHEhYbn
Its really fucking good.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAJ0jlO3yUep
I watch tv for about an hour or less, take my medicine and then head to the gym.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAbJ1khCSQnD
I park my car closer to the bank which is further away from Planet Fitness because I like walking the distance.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAL0Zpadr3by
I enter the gym, swipe my barcode with my membership and ask for 20 minutes on the Hydromassage.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAeWBzaOuXSY
After I go stretch for 10 to 15 minutes, lift for another 20 to 30 minutes, then walk for an hour while reading my books.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAGRCM5S9HwO
I get to read like 30 pages which I really enjoy, but lately its all felt monotonous, I am struggling to do the things that I used to really enjoy.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA3HVsDaevsk
I stretch for another 10 to 15 minutes or hit the hydromassage for another 10 minutes.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAYCpD7hGz2o
This is when I leave and head back home.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAJoHFajzdT8
Going back home I look forward to eating, sometimes showering, making myself eggs , drinking some protein powder (double chocolate).
740Please respect copyright.PENANAnaDMvy0jPG
I sit to watch something on Netflix, Hulu, Prime or YouTube while promoting my music.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAn2qIk9yaqb
Sometimes Ill make music, sometimes, Ill write a story or create some digital art.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAT8q3JWtSrZ
Lately, I’ve been getting into rom coms and feel good movies to distract myself.
740Please respect copyright.PENANAUClNqJYGRy
I want to be convinced that something good lies ahead.
740Please respect copyright.PENANA1CDXgsVNpg
I want to believe that something real and tangible is going to happen.
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