133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvFYNiOBjSm
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrzHG0uCaRF
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJCpSvctzC
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtfW2iZIgA
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXcpv0kPdZz
There is a distant humming I can hear coming from somewhere in the kitchen. I continue to lay on my back on the floor, a soft rug separating me from the hardwood. The rain pats lowly on the windows and I hear footsteps coming from outside my door. Although the music from my laptop is blasting next to me, I can hear such insignificant things. I also keep thinking of her. I can hear my pain in the lyrics and high pitch of the guitar. These songs are speaking to my lovesick self.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQqDzJWq785
You should get up now, my brain tells me.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW1XttWqhfu
I only have so much strength in my legs to stay up. My heartache over something that never happened seems to weigh me down.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmP4Xv7VHo4
“You love her too much.”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFzF2Xggr7
I look up to face him.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoyiBw7uDfd
“I don’t want to hear that shit right now.” I start to walk to my desk to get a better view of him.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIe4SNCo6CF
“You’re beating yourself up over this too much. You can’t make her love you. It’s not fair to the both of you.”
He keeps talking about things I already know. I’m getting annoyed already. Usually, it takes a while for him to get on my nerves.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYaviOcRNTs
“She doesn’t even know. Let me be sad on my own. I’m not hurting her.”
At least I hope so, I think to myself.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfcGfw8Zz9E
He looks down to give me the same look he’s given me for years. Domineering, belittling and straight up fucking annoying.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT3Np6GGoal
He sighs and breaks eye contact, “I guess, but that doesn’t mean you should be miserable every day. It makes me hate her.”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡItsycTNR9z
I scoff, “She didn’t even do anything for you to hate her. Stop blaming her.”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBz2HiPCkhk
I would hate her too if she did anything to hurt me. It would be easier to blame her for this, but I know it’s stupid to do that.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwKkY5RCykN
“So I’m supposed to just sit here and watch you die? You can love someone else if you just let yourself!”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ98nVaptHTR
He’s always been overprotective of my feelings. He just wants me to be happy… I think.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNONBjMlbM0
I let out a sigh of my own, finally letting myself breathe correctly for a bit, “I started this, dragging someone else into my misery would be cruel.”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzekHLxgm3C
I try my best to keep to myself and to bury my feelings. The jaguar always intrudes in my thoughts and finds out how I feel before I do. When he found out I made a deal with La Virgen, he made it his duty to constantly remind me what I have to do to fulfill my end of the deal.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnlMbcB4tea
‘Make you first love fall in love with you in 2 years’ time. If you fail to do so, I’ll drag you down with me.’
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLKFp83C08j
Her voice was like magic, she was bright and beautiful, but absolutely terrifying. My first mistake was wishing for money for my mom and sister. My second mistake was agreeing to the deal.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiuXM6Twi5e
“I’m going to try to summon her again.”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqcxGV4Unhp
He stands up abruptly, “Are you insane?! Are you going to ask for more money or for mercy? I told you she’s merciless from the start! I swear to-”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLBZbYd64L
“Relax, I’m not going to do any of that. I tried it once already,” I mumble that last sentence as to not agitate him any more than I already am.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ35FJgjB9IA
He plops back down in a laying position, “So what are you going to ask for this time? It better not be some dumb shit again.”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5TkEtM7pKJ
“You’ll see when I summon her. It’s not anything huge. I promise,” I’m trying to stay on his good side for now.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhaFwZAeDjZ
He scoffs again and disappears into my shelf. I’ll see him again soon, probably in my nightmares, where he usually hangs out.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWWuy4tmAVh
I hear the front door unlock and see my roommate walk in. He shakes off his umbrella on the door mat and waves at me with a small smile. He always dresses nice on gloomy days. Probably to keep his mood up.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4dVu2Ux4B7
“Ding dong!” He usually says this to greet me or to announce his presence in the dorm. I give him a small smile, acknowledging him.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0YtcRjH3oT
He looks around the room and into the kitchen, “Who was that you were just talking to?”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUqYQggsJ3b
“I was just on the phone with someone. How was class?” I swiftly change the subject.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrWehZeEc9
He lets out a dramatic sigh while putting his coat away, “Bro, I hate that class so much. It’s enough that I failed it last semester, but the fact that I have to take it again? This school hates me.”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzgp388daTs
I chuckle, “Well, if you ever need help, let me know. I somewhat enjoyed that class last semester.”
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡipYoY7w1Nn
He makes his way to his desk and pulls out his pipe from the top drawer. He likes pipes, “Yeah right. You complained about it so much last year,” he sits to fill the pipe for a few seconds, lights it and slowly sucks, “Want a hit? Its Friday,” he says enthusiastically.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fXfsbI8Lv
That’s usually an excuse I have for smoking, “You know me so well.” I take the pipe and suck.
133Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZjjW3lyM4
We sit, smoke and chat for a while, waiting for the flower to turn to ash. The fuzzy high feeling sinks in after a while and I forget my heartache. We decide to sit on the floor after a while, and I’m back to where I started.
ns216.73.216.143da2
