孫悟空降至花果山水簾洞，走路搖搖擺擺，全身帶著酒氣。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvSopkgMaka
悟空：小的們！我回來啦！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyn7MbpFPpX
通背猿猴帶著一幫猴子歡呼圍上。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWfb6SSvNU
通背猿猴：大王，你老人家可回來了！你這一去，100多年！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRxqzJyiFLw
悟空：啊。你怎麽計算的？我只離開半年。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGH8kDfdUYk
通背猿猴：你忘啦，天上一天，地下一年。100多年前，我對你說過。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcsddtKeyF5
悟空：你半年前這麽說。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHszAQ3NXht
通背猿猴：我100多年前說的。你以後上天，記下天數，寫在紙上。在天數後加個「年」字，這個數字便是地上的年數。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzNVXjanSk5
悟空：有別的計算方法嗎？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqJHF4HpfRa
通背猿猴：你用筆，也可以把年先寫上。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSmJh4QWORt
悟空：天數加年，2個我一塊寫。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3EsISSELOX
通背猿猴：100多年沒見面，我們好想你！55555……（傷感地大哭）87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrF3M0cqQi0
悟空：想我想哭了？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBBB91qGms6
通背猿猴：嗯。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGJR1elt2U
悟空：額。（吐了一口）87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjVH2vf0W3
通背猿猴：大王，你怎麽了？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa1KxoQa8vP
悟空：我也想你們！額。（又吐了一口）87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsh3AGK69Nf
通背猿猴：哪不舒服？你在吐呢。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKcA1L76VPR
悟空：沒。是我想你們想的，吐了。（又吐幾口）87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUbP5EnqTz
通背猿猴：你想我們挺多的！玉帝封你做齊天大聖沒？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtscFyJefCz
悟空：封了。在天宮舉行的冊封儀式，使我終生難忘。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkvmBaIn8QX
通背猿猴：大王，描述一下冊封儀式，怎樣？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfHOgtWouN6
悟空：不了。我終生難忘的，我知道就行。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuPkqzDWzng
通背猿猴：描述100多年前的事，回憶一下美好時光。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1DBKrvMLn
悟空：我累了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiUwYypGVGy
撲騰一聲，孫悟空倒在地上。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡItCzIKnkyh
通背猿猴：是醉了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRMRrDemBYt
天宮。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtz6qwJ9Ytc
靈霄殿上，玉帝的臥底土地，進見玉帝。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhsXzStkLaH
土地：陛下，蟠桃園又大又圓的仙桃，都被孫悟空偷吃了！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJBhXwccpZt
玉帝：啊！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEFvWOr9cH
一會兒，太上老君進見玉帝。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMoFoz3Bhz9
太上老君：陛下，我嘔心瀝血煉的九轉金丹，都被孫悟空偷吃了！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyn6jEXNQB3
玉帝：啊！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGzaHFnbcWm
又一會兒，王母進見玉帝。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLeq3z6NlrM
王母：陛下，我準備的蟠桃宴，弄了很多酒菜，都被孫悟空偷吃了！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtOqscrkFN5
玉帝：孫悟空啊孫悟空，你這個吃貨！你敢偷吃我吃的東西？！孫悟空在哪？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ZA1BOyG6t
太上老君：天宮的監視鏡顯示，孫悟空已返回花果山。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrnXqddBmqd
玉帝：誰願下界捉拿吃貨孫悟空？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlTqSkuuf2p
托塔天王：我！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlCgVFtXBeu
哪咤：我！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIXQ6KPkani
巨靈神：我！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtcOzTwiiqu
玉帝：天王，又是你們3個。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj2fUFGKTGc
托塔天王：這次可以加幾個。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtzBhgvvKai
玉帝：我給你天兵10萬。記住，這次要給孫悟空一個群毆。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUkAkCT2oFD
托塔天王：這麽多人群毆一個，要排隊掛號。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl3GDAPPuw2
玉帝：不能排隊，不能掛號。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ1ZjolXr3Q
托塔天王：一定做到。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFc88JBNWEZ
李托塔、哪咤、巨靈神，帶天兵10萬，一路出師下界。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGbtQp8o2pA
路上。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡErKR192I0R
哪咤：父王，我們10多萬人，怎麽做到群毆一個？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpfwyKIJ2kT
托塔天王：簡單。10多萬人停在花果山上空，一起向下扔兵器。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4lgJ0YaHnd
巨靈神：太血腥了吧？花果山會血流成河。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8NLs5Uov4E
托塔天王：下一場大雨沖洗幹凈了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIarA9Z5zGB
巨靈神：一場大雨能解決麽？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCKyLENJbM
托塔天王：我看行。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDBg9hzVqT3
巨靈神：我看不行。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXzO1tTf83m
托塔天王：不行再下第二場、第三場，直到沖洗幹凈收場！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR9l66pjlj4
巨靈神：我看也行了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMdnMynQIko
這一日，花果山陽光明媚，萬裏無雲。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡva9EGk6aCA
孫悟空正在和眾猴飲酒狂歡。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1JcUzdC67y
半空中，托塔天王、哪咤、巨靈神出現。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNvFmEuQaTl
托塔天王：孫悟空！你偷吃仙桃、偷喝仙酒、偷吃仙丹。玉帝派我將你這個吃貨捉拿歸案！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡasGkn0xjtk
悟空：又來捉我？上次捉我失敗，這次，你有沒有做好心理準備？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvYJ22k1Gm9
托塔天王：有。這次準備群毆你。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtrojtwhOLf
悟空：群毆？你們3個？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡykBlIK55Ev
托塔天王：我還有10萬天兵斷後。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZkl3A04wU
悟空：總共10萬多3人？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZkvVsxy3Rx
托塔天王：人多也能群毆你！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlzYLQaqyfn
悟空：失敗，失敗。我這花果山上上下下，也是10萬人多出3個。這次，只能1對1單挑。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmq8nl9PAjZ
托塔天王：啊！是嗎？這可怎麽辦？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ14KLLlw149
巨靈神：天王，我們按原計劃開戰吧。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06u8ROQSkv
托塔天王：不能！敵我雙方的人數對等，不能群毆。開戰，違抗玉帝旨意。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnpidJlBHi8
哪咤：父王，我向玉帝請求支援。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxk0UmFenjE
托塔天王：快。我先做好群毆準備，圍住花果山。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbp9hOVn42
花果山上空，集聚10萬天兵，遮住太陽，天黑了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8w1w7kCeUM
眾猴：大王，我們害怕。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZEtDMtu7IC
悟空：天黑怕什麽？來人，掌燈。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmeT90nqsL4
頓時，花果山上萬家燈火。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6yeSVqD8Wr
哪咤返回天宮，在南天門遇見玉帝。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTrrVO3D3po
玉帝十分關心花果山戰況，正和群臣在南天門觀戰。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdpfxJOMzaC
哪咤：陛下！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPI497Fryys
玉帝：3太子，前方戰事如何？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKoio8jslPA
哪咤：急需增兵。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gHjJu5S1E
玉帝：10萬兵力也不夠？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEXkxtBOXLP
哪咤：孫悟空的兵力也是10萬，不能群毆。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtVLxWu4jrC
玉帝：啊！天宮的總兵力只有10萬。諸位仙臣，這可咋辦？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlFb0IxLX7Y
突然，一道霞光閃過，南海觀世音路過。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDzJO3vId52
觀音：諸位好！我們一起參加蟠桃宴會吧？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzRXEdfHhP
王母：蟠桃宴會的飯菜，被下界一個叫孫悟空的猴子偷吃了！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmLJREcrokc
觀音：陛下，真的麽？求證一下。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGVUhxLhFB
玉帝：真的。我後悔，當初多花錢、多招兵買馬，多好。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMAQt1TQBTx
觀音：孫悟空很厲害麽？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjDp91rXxr1
玉帝：那猴子偷吃仙桃、偷吃仙丹、偷喝仙酒，是一個擁有兵力10萬之多，很厲害的一個吃貨！觀愛卿，你可有法子對付？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDgVKzxnhDM
觀音：我推薦一位。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoJwU6PXMdc
玉帝：直說。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3iALT3hnTw
觀音：二郎神。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWHzJXYvVoB
玉帝：2——郎神？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwdiax0Anz
觀音：二郎神現居灌江口，享受下方香火，他也是一個吃貨。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLX1ZE5AHRo
玉帝：行麽？聽到2我擔心。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDuU9cU8F8G
觀音：放心。你別忘了，一貨擒一貨。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOrga8xnDcA
玉帝：他還是2貨吧。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp67Mqj2Acn
觀音：二郎神可以一抵萬！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHnfgLJkRRA
玉帝：好！增兵一萬，宣2郎神迎戰孫悟空。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaBvRC1kmGk
哪咤帶著二郎神，見到托塔天王。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9EDVt09mFg
哪咤：增兵到。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvgqhZMyDzx
托塔天王：增兵多少？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5YTlnt9f1M
哪咤：一萬。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGGG8AW6Z9u
托塔天王：在哪？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDEM1cxbtfo
二郎神：我。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4gnJUA7E3M
托塔天王：怎麽帶來一個人？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYg9Sl1kdLn
哪咤：父王，觀音和玉帝都說，他可以以一抵萬。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZWVYrIciPp
托塔天王：超兵一萬，夠群毆了。天兵聽令，舉起你們手中的兵器，群毆開始。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhkJDtx1xMH
二郎神：慢。聽說孫悟空和我一樣，都是吃貨。在群毆之前，我想單獨和孫悟空交流一下。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ37c8iXkQaQ
托塔天王：你交流快點。手舉著兵器，挺累的。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2YfjPVQbLD
相貌清俊、秀氣的二郎神，手拿三尖兩刃槍，步伐輕盈的走在花果山上。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOfPXhKl8GZ
眾猴：好帥喔！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnivRmGMBbO
悟空：帥哥，你哪位？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmYq6xprieF
二郎神：我是號稱以一抵萬的灌江口吃貨……87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWGjgjoyabc
悟空：同吃，同吃。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDNNirIXcW
二郎神：帥氣稱霸一方，至今還單身、還沒經歷初戀、還是處男的二郎神！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlb7gvhoPAP
悟空：沒感覺。我男的。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkTqzbRAiAc
二郎神一轉身，不知從那拿出一朵花，含在嘴裏。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVwwga2cNFV
悟空：說了沒感覺，你擺Pose也沒用。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3qEtcmzCr
二郎神：知道這是什麽花？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOukv9T2u0T
悟空：鮮花。我這花果山多的是。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡboZnsm6WzD
二郎神：錯！這是一朵只在冬天盛開的梅花。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvUCXK0T4wC
悟空：喔。這種花，花果山可沒有。你那多不多？我打算移植到花果山。等花果山上下雪，我想身臨其境「墻角樹枝美，唯有暗香來」的詩境。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgALbi8yFn
二郎神：知道這是什麽神器麽？（手指自己的兵器）87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEWUjY2gVHX
悟空：怪怪的。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWrVzf8uSe
二郎神：這是上古神器——三尖兩刃槍。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIR6C14fs3q
悟空：三刃兩尖槍？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQsl5eK1N0
二郎神：三尖兩刃槍。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNnucfnY47T
悟空：幹脆簡稱三尖槍，聽到這麽憋口的武器名字，沒心情和你打了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFPHbhiaPzE
二郎神：誰說和你打？我只想在群毆前，會會你。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIUKjD1QDcm
悟空：多你一個，也看不出群毆的效果。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSaiuBJ37cE
二郎神：我可是以一抵萬。多我一個，等於多了一萬人。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUieHZxy5of
悟空：好吧。這次天宮對我群毆的挑戰，我接受。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlczDxvYbWB
二郎神：等著群毆吧你！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHfNiOUgax2
悟空：現在還沒開始，你我先過幾招，預熱一下，咋樣？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQqahEgsov
二郎神：現在10萬人圍著花果山，你不覺得熱嗎？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxa1Tx4zQzi
悟空：我有點缺氧。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡISx5hcAE0Y
二郎神：同感。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlzA47LAXio
孫悟空和二郎神開始做深呼吸。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqGsYh0CUz
悟空：我還沒和處男打過，你和我打一場，破破我的處吧。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6zZiSeSvye
二郎神：不打。等天上的兵器扔你。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAoXby3FXtV
悟空：你一個人打敗我，拿個頭等功。知名度一提高，會吸引很多美女。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrUUXz5dOU0
二郎神：開打。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo9tg9eeomw
兩個人的兵器一碰，三尖槍斷了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPTkvZejjzi
二郎神：啊！我的神器！55555……（大哭）87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQTAnwJVhin
悟空：什麽神器，不堪一擊。要麽是次品，要麽是膺品，要麽是仿品。不要為它難過了。回家找個不是奸商的鐵匠，重新打造一件。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVOhtbw8PKL
二郎神：我的真是上古神器。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgCi9KG8DtB
悟空：是麽？我這根棍子，是上上古的神器，你的材質沒我的好。不要為它難過了。回家買件上上上古的，肯定比我的好。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxv3LKbpgUa
二郎神：我要為我的神器報仇！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoExhGFcKoI
悟空：你回家買一件再說。過幾天，我約你再戰。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpII3ELeaO9
二郎神：我還帶著一件上古神器呢。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNotK84BF00
悟空：留著吧，別斷了再傷心。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBJCvXUgXDj
二郎神把2指頭伸進嘴裏，吹了一聲口哨。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0j4V8cGndO
悟空：這也算神器？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAJkxcPrbZy
口哨一吹，不知從那冒出一條狗，在孫悟空腿上咬了一口。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SEYwJXjH6
悟空：疼死我了！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOqoVPNmzFp
二郎神：哈哈哈。這是我的第二件神器——上古神犬。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXDpALI8ocY
悟空：有沒有狂犬病？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4PyXEfw3Al
二郎神：不確定。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ024qGMg8BU
悟空：來人！我要看醫生！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs3vV0OJqoO
南天門的大門口。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIUFyA7ZkM
觀音：孫悟空被二郎神打傷了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblqS501jz9
玉帝：貌似不是2郎神傷的。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8yXjT9B99Y
太上老君：陛下，我可助二郎神一臂之力。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvFDiWkFZPy
玉帝：你也養狗？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5YnddfWlm
太上老君：我沒養狗，但我有一個套狗的金剛圈。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3AFTdxLYw3
玉帝：能套猴子嗎？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfeZWahr3iE
太上老君：都是動物，應該可以。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡslYpk0yW6Z
說著，老君拿出金剛圈，瞄準孫悟空，把金剛圈發射出去。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6n0WbZ2BKn
孫悟空還在忍痛求救，沒註意天上掉下東西，被金剛圈砸中頭部，暈倒了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXc9S6tsExp
二郎神叫來托塔天王，將其繩索捆綁，返回天宮。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs1O0BFjReZ
孫悟空被天兵押到斬妖臺，玉帝率眾觀斬。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2UkBTo9zd3
玉帝：孫悟空，沒想到，你怕狗。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkGbLRDWLA
悟空：剛才，是誰扔磚砸我頭的？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9jW9aIW12n
太上老君：不是磚，是金剛圈。你恨我吧？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGAa7s7xL7l
悟空：謝謝你！我被你的金剛圈點穴，止住大動脈，控製了狂犬病毒在我體內的擴散。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwjSrk9xr5
太上老君：啊。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSIvM0kFy1O
悟空：諸位，我被狗咬了。和我保持一定距離，小心狂犬病。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFCbygQvKQ
玉帝：開斬！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsK6OdtWQCX
悟空：等等。我是仙不是妖，不能在斬妖臺斬我。求換地方。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX9ZVaJo5ky
玉帝：換什麽地方。把「妖」改成「仙」，筆墨伺候。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAM2rtZrBnb
在斬妖仙臺，孫悟空被刀砍斧剁，火燒雷擊。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrQekZz4KWS
悟空：我死了沒有？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi88qzWGHE8
玉帝：啊！怎麽還不死？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0G9oXiE9Nr
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空偷吃仙界食物，已是金剛之身，殺他的方法不對啊。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡltDIEFAxgL
玉帝：咋辦？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNEVej7z89R
太上老君：把孫悟空放進我的八卦爐，扣緊蓋子，煉上7749天，他化成金水，能煉出金子。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfonFXMqeiL
玉帝：太好啦！煉出金子，可以招兵買馬。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3tLBCd5bS
孫悟空被天兵押到兜率宮。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72vdKKtW7z
太上老君：把孫悟空推進八卦爐。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt0mMNjdbwl
悟空：真要把我煉成黃金？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXxudGSCGxC
太上老君：玉帝急需用錢。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOMAHzCgl0p
悟空：這裏有沒有浴池？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6KvRMHHbP7
太上老君：想幹嘛？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjHYi8rfcZ
悟空：我想脫掉衣服，洗洗澡，去趟廁所。可以確保煉出黃金的含金率在99.9999999%以上。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt5wSOYNoPI
太上老君：放心的進去吧！我這爐子煉成的黃金，都是100%的純度。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUizNMIqiBM
悟空：需要煉我多久？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD3YyTdnBWp
太上老君：7749天。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNuu1X9Wf1Z
悟空：盡量快些。我很想體驗一下，變成黃金的感覺。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMekpqjZ0ra
1天，2天，3天………7749天後。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvA7xVGDUVc
太上老君：開爐！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2F1H1p2Zfh
老君探頭向爐中一看，看到2個圓圓的、閃閃發光的東西。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWPu2qyyV4r
太上老君：哈哈！孫悟空被煉成金蛋啦！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcEBUzpd9D9
說著，伸手去拿金蛋。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY1zIvRol1c
只聽爐內「哎呀」一聲！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZvaeRC22j
爐內：誰插我？誰插我？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SRvqEfvQp
太上老君：我的金蛋！我的金蛋！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgTdlvwKevU
爐內：哪個王八蛋插我？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0I2MKl42Rm
呼！孫悟空從爐內跳出來。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJnPZpk7asL
悟空：哪個王八蛋插我眼睛？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fADVdL9xP
這時，老君才看清楚，發光的2個金蛋，是孫悟空的2只眼睛。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86DgavgLoP
太上老君：孫悟空，你怎麽還沒死？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBm5FYl6PO4
悟空：我也想知道。我怎麽還沒變黃金？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbGW6wq5Iz2
太上老君：你的眼睛已變成黃金。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZQp9zcNZIP
悟空：多謝了。我的眼睛已經變成火眼金睛！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUZmzjyRAtL
太上老君：有什麽了不起。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm8eYAuBEK2
突然，老君的衣服起火。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAIIh5TidoA
太上老君：啊！孫悟空，不要用你的眼睛看我！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLD0qjQMq8
兜率宮內，孫悟空眼睛看到的地方，急速起火。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXlSGPbNKI
太上老君極速報知靈霄殿的玉帝。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO5D0j6ouGi
太上老君：陛下，備水！備水！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6CwHhi1nVp
玉帝剛好喝下一口茶，看到老君衣服冒火，嘴裏一噴水，火滅了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzGMrSUSaxU
玉帝：老君，你煉金小心點。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6NjefoKojK
太上老君：陛下，孫悟空從火爐逃出，還煉成一對火眼金睛，看到什麽就使什麽著火！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiGfc5pe12I
眾仙：啊！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiLpatq3Go7
玉帝：怕什麽。來人，放狗！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkdgmLBZwZp
剛說完，孫悟空來了。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiHPa8qYSte
悟空：玉帝，狗在我這。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUEe5ioZgc2
玉帝一看，孫悟空用火眼金睛，正在烤一只狗。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7fapQxNhSQ
玉帝：啊！護駕！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH9L1kbq4r9
眾仙神護住玉帝。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1M5ldQ9twB
悟空：別緊張。等會兒大家一起吃燒烤。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGTIi3m7jik
一會兒，靈霄殿上，到處是火。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3bEN5uMXH8
玉帝和太白金星躲在一張桌子下，一杯一杯的不停向身上倒水。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS7TBV95kH1
玉帝：愛卿，快幫朕想想辦法。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTy3iCet7Es
太白金星：陛下，聽說西方雷音寺的主持如來，有一坐騎是一條狗，很厲害。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhY6W0Fjfkx
玉帝：他哪是啥狗？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjE9tiRrIe5
太白金星：好像叫佛獒。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8enytWcdUM
玉帝：速請西方如來！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsbE8sC0daL
如來騎著佛獒，從靈山雷音寺趕來。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGnQJQ8M45V
悟空：你哪位？愛吃燒烤嗎？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf7XtyGnQxn
如來：我是西方極樂世界釋迦牟尼尊者，南無阿彌陀佛。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwPgIyx6EUz
悟空：歡迎！一只狗不夠吃，你的這條狗，能不能貢獻一下？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsc9uHNrXzH
如來：孫悟空，狗是人類最好的朋友。很多人反對、反感吃狗肉，你怎麽一點也不愛護動物？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBfym1ln0cZ
悟空：難道你愛護動物？整天騎著狗亂逛，你願意被人騎著亂逛啊？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNASV8QLKl7
如來：額。。。我這條狗名叫佛獒，很兇猛。我騎著它，是防止它咬人。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡetwnCTTedm
悟空：防止咬人還會咬人。吃進肚子，省心看管，絕不咬人。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM58O0Zr6ky
如來：我這條狗，可不好吃！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡun7QIKo3XL
悟空：調料放全，好吃的很。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg150jaFp3i
如來：我先讓你吃一小塊。難吃，你別吃它，留它一條性命。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrgqCwJte03
悟空：先來一條狗腿。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO2issMqCg1
如來：我先給你一只狗掌吧。接著！87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXuRrwCpt6V
如來投給孫悟空一只狗掌。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNiSUTDAF4c
悟空接住狗掌，發現狗掌上有一串字——唵嘜呢叭嘧吽。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw47FCBomag
悟空：你還會微雕？87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6EmZNt0HDG
突然，狗掌越變越大、越變越大……87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg0TSXKVQsj
悟空：這麽大，我可吃不完。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcvuSGCUPY1
狗掌化作金木水火土五座聯山，喚名五行山，墜落在地球，重重的把孫悟空壓住。87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡckixsdyze4
87Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE37ggkX4n9
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