我鍾意同妳鬥氣，其實只係因為… （連載中） - 一百三十二

一百三十二

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「搞咗咁耐，佢哋終於修成正果喇！」孫興泰興奮地道。

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「係啊！真係替佢哋開心！」演技大爆發既我，嘗試用最真誠既語氣講出黎，但其實我一啲都唔想繼續就呢個話題同孫興泰講落去，不過條友都唔識停，於是我個腦自動安排咗錄音機去應付佢，無論孫興泰講乜，我都係果幾句︰「係啊！好開心啊！」、「係啊！佢哋好襯啊！」、「係啊！阿賢真係叻仔啊！」

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洪偉賢同葉佩儀就響我眼前不遠處肩並肩咁行，我一路留意住佢哋，佢哋最初冇拖手，當時我個心仲有少少鬆口氣，不過洪偉賢隻手係咁high下、掂下葉佩儀既手背，又想一嘢拖落葉佩儀隻手度，葉佩儀就係咁避開佢，又對佢講咗啲乜唔知乜嘢，但係洪偉賢死都唔放棄，開埋口又呃又氹咁再嘗試多幾次，最終葉佩儀終於就範…

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我響後面睇住洪偉賢同葉佩儀十指緊扣呢一幕真係好似比雷劈咁，口中既錄音機都hang咗機，個心真係好似比人大大力用利刃拮咗一下咁。

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「阿必？」孫興泰見我唔答話，突然問我嘢。

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「仆街，急屎！」我見到前面有個廁所標誌，情急生智，拿拿淋飛奔過去男廁，邊衝邊講︰「你哋上去先，我屙完屎打比你哋！」

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屌你老味，我當時演技仲未大成，再望落去我驚自己hold唔住…

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好彩我衝得切入廁所，我第一時間衝埋洗手盤度洗臉冷靜…

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唔準喊…唔準喊…林必才，你喊過雙眼人哋係睇得出架…頂撚住啊林必才！

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做戲做全套，為咗唔好比洪偉賢或者孫興泰真係突然衝入黎見我冇屙屎，我真係走咗入廁格度坐響馬桶上面冷靜咗一陣…

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坐坐下，我好似真係有啲急屎，咁就順便屙埋，今次真係名副其實既「做戲做全套」。

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屙完之後個人都冷靜返少少，我再調整下個樣，對住塊鏡擠眉弄眼、整估做怪，雙手仲插埋落個口度做鬼臉，練習下啲表情，為一陣既「演出」再做下準備。

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我係唔可以比人睇穿我鍾意咗葉佩儀既！

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「…」

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我發覺隔離有個小朋友望住我。

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我兩隻食指仲插住響口度拉長個嘴…

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「…」

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「…」

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「爸爸，呢個哥哥傻咗啊！」

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比個小朋友咁樣搞一搞，我自己都忍唔住笑咗出黎，總算令自己輕鬆返少少。

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我打咗比孫興泰，佢哋已經搵到間餐廳坐低咗，佢講咗間餐廳比我知之後，我就跟住上去。

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「喂！」

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「搞咁耐架？」孫興泰笑問。

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「條屎長吖嘛，屙極都屙唔斷，係屙得耐少少架喇。」我講完之後仲要自己鳩笑出黎。

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「妖好核突你個死人頭，就黎食飯可唔可以唔好講埋啲核突嘢？」葉佩儀不滿地問。

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「嘻嘻，我講事實咋嘛！」我仲係白卡樣咁笑住答。

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「妖。」

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洪偉賢拎起個餐牌遞過黎，道︰「你睇下有乜嘢啱食喇，唔好嗌咁貴啊，錫住我個荷包啊！」

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葉佩儀呢個時候插口奇道︰「做乜嘢要錫住你個荷包既？」

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洪偉賢笑道︰「其實妳知唔知，我哋可以喺埋一齊，阿必果陣都幫咗我好多架，所以我應承佢，為咗報答佢，就請佢食飯！」

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喂！

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屌你！

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唔好亂講嘢！

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不過已經太遲，葉佩儀奇奇怪怪咁望住我，不發一言。

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「如果唔係阿必，我又點會識到妳呢個咁好既女朋友呢？」洪偉賢笑道︰「阿必可以話係我哋既媒人黎架！」

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「哦。」

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呼…你講呢樣咋吓嘛，咁的確係我介紹班女仔比洪偉賢同孫興泰識既。

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於是我堆起笑容，用精湛既演技說道︰「哎呀呀，咁果陣真係有人話我身邊好多靚女，所以想我介紹比佢哋兩個識吖嘛！呢啲媒人費，抵比喇！」

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我講完之後孫興泰有啲尷尬，不過洪偉賢呢個同我一樣面皮幾尺厚，佢笑道︰「抵，梗係抵比架！」頓了一頓，佢續道︰「而且…有時我媾妳果陣真係有啲嘢諗唔通既話，佢都幫我諗咗好多計仔去追妳架！」

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嘩屌，我中伏！

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我仲以為你只係諗住同葉佩講多謝我介紹你哋識啫，你連呢啲都講埋出黎？有冇搞錯啊！

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一百三十二

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