「其實點解咁堅決想剃⋯⋯哎。」我問到一半,醒起錐人痛處唔應該,立即收口,「咁我要點幫你,講句想你做和尚就得?」286Please respect copyright.PENANAPb8ycTzccg
286Please respect copyright.PENANAYZCzHojZYY
「唔止㗎啦,仲要好誠心咁諗先得啦。」客人笑咪咪補充。286Please respect copyright.PENANAKGfksuraXs
286Please respect copyright.PENANAWF2rTUfbwh
「哦。」老實我都唔知點為之誠心,自私講我緊係唔想同客人結仇,但點解要做和尚,啫係我希望佢開心得唔得先,就算出家,唔可以做神父牧師架咩,做道士又得唔得?不過試試無壞:「咁你去做和尚啦!」286Please respect copyright.PENANAN5osnyAwiq
286Please respect copyright.PENANATMD47lm3Jh
我都無學過佛,咁樣心態真係會得咩?286Please respect copyright.PENANAYmBZKkrNIS
286Please respect copyright.PENANALmstbwraiM
師傅睇怕一早知唔得,都無等冷場,拍拍我背脊:「你知唔知和尚係做啲乜?如果唔知好難許願啫。」286Please respect copyright.PENANA8bM07Z2OC7
286Please respect copyright.PENANAkHuWqg55xO
「係咪敲經拜神食齋打坐果啲?」死,我又擔心自己在師傅面前答得太輕佻,於是恭恭敬敬講多句,「啫係好虔誠咁拜佛信佛嘅修行者?」286Please respect copyright.PENANALGgjsZIe1V
286Please respect copyright.PENANACzwfIT2ONx
師傅無奈搖頭笑一聲,露出了滿口煙屎牙,「咁又唔話得你錯,和尚日日都做呢啲⋯⋯不如咁啦,你拎住閻摩降,上清涼山補吓習先。」286Please respect copyright.PENANAyqV84GucFt
286Please respect copyright.PENANAiPLaH6DeWU
我正想問清涼山係邊,客人立即無獎遊戲搶答:「五臺山我呀媽都去過啦,醫生話佢生唔到小朋友,佢就上山搵文殊菩薩,坐旅遊巴果陣巴士倒後衝落山,但去到山涯邊就煞住咗,呀媽話成車人唯獨佢見到菩薩顯靈,仲指示佢去拜送子觀音,送子觀音即係童女嘅化身之一,童女就送咗我俾佢做仔啦。」286Please respect copyright.PENANACH06OVpODj
286Please respect copyright.PENANA8qokwcKtv8
「傻佬,我話清涼山啊,咩五臺山啊!」286Please respect copyright.PENANAhU8dF8tZPy
286Please respect copyright.PENANA5Tbve5CKqQ
「唔係咩!東北方有處,名清涼山,從昔已來,諸菩薩眾於中止住;現有菩薩,名文殊師利,與其眷屬、諸菩薩眾一萬人俱,常在其中而演說法。《華嚴經》明明咁講架啵!《佛說文殊師利法寶藏陀羅尼經》咁講,有國名大振那。其國中有山號曰五頂。文殊師利童子遊行居住。為諸眾生於中說法。佛經咁講,人人都咁講!」286Please respect copyright.PENANAPkW0T8a2bN
286Please respect copyright.PENANAwgWfkNEgvc
「哈!同我講經!咁你識唔識臨濟義玄!有一般學人向五臺山裏求文殊,早錯了也,五臺山無文殊!」師傅講到笑呵呵:「講經無撚用!拜佛哂鳩氣!你呀媽更加黐撚線!」
286Please respect copyright.PENANAReS4FpNofA
「唔準鬧我呀媽!唔準鬧我呀媽!唔準鬧我呀媽!」客人摸住自己耳仔,開始原地跳。「菩薩都無情講,菩薩都無情講!」286Please respect copyright.PENANA9GAvIO4dBT
286Please respect copyright.PENANABk9BNf2iM6
我無見過客人呀媽,唔到我亦唔識得評論,我唔識心理學,唔知咩叫自閉症,但知道要體諒多啲,師傅無再激客人,口講「你啱你啱」當投降,但我又唔見師傅有後悔過自己鬧人娘親,好似本身知道好多客人兩母子嘅事。286Please respect copyright.PENANAr8rWUlFbjB
286Please respect copyright.PENANAA2byVm8jaR
師傅望望我,叫我嗱嗱臨去一轉清涼山,佢話我剃開個頭唔知點收尾,本身預咗,因為我唔知點解要人做和尚,又唔知和尚係乜,但知完自然就得心應手。286Please respect copyright.PENANAD9DnoVKOAX
286Please respect copyright.PENANAAYQo8C1IKG
我心急問清涼山係邊,師傅就咁話:「唸返句咒就得,閻摩降識路架啦,同埋唔洗急到走夾唔抖嘅,頭先剃頭唔乾淨,元神又無斬甩到,反正你返嚟都要再搞一次。」286Please respect copyright.PENANAWsNAJ3foXe
286Please respect copyright.PENANAIgJMnxS942
我心入面馬上嚟反應,覺得自己好似一個交唔到成績表嘅學生。286Please respect copyright.PENANAlK5kiXIEdw
286Please respect copyright.PENANATNWZ7QhS04
師傅又拍多下我背脊打氣:「俾啲精神!都唔關你事,係佢未諗清楚自己飛髮定剃頭啫,到時俾佢揀多次咪得!好好好,走先啦!」286Please respect copyright.PENANAAz70JOyHvO
286Please respect copyright.PENANARdt9QAbC3K
我點頭說知道,打算要走,行去門後又想拆門鈴,師傅話唔洗帶啷啷,因為我唔洗帶客人路,呢轉我自己去就得。286Please respect copyright.PENANA5Pn3Fpb0Rh
286Please respect copyright.PENANAKJJJ2aQr3u
客人想跟去,師傅叫佢唔好,而且未剃眉頭眼額,元神又跟咗入呢個新身體度,出門實會俾人斬,我宜家知咗咩係劍俠,就知師傅唔係真係講緊《天若有情》,油尖旺似乎一街都係劍俠,真係唔講無留意,失禮晒!286Please respect copyright.PENANAgThczpOLRo
286Please respect copyright.PENANA9EnIQdxP4w
「咁叔叔呢?佢都係奪咗人身體,劍俠唔會斬佢咩?」286Please respect copyright.PENANADqH28zkooN
286Please respect copyright.PENANABTPAbkvwhX
師傅同客人講的野不嬲精彩,但我都唔想耽誤件事,我拋高剃刀,講句「請寶貝轉身。」286Please respect copyright.PENANA5jsCa2idGg
286Please respect copyright.PENANAcdCDIMrk15
「哈!」師傅無理啦間冷笑一聲,「佢前世咁惡咁記仇,邊個敢開佢齋啊!」286Please respect copyright.PENANAfCOspJj4RQ
286Please respect copyright.PENANAO8vsVTaBos
師傅輕鬆講,我聽到背脊骨都直一直,完全係頸梗膊痛,但飛劍快,我呢刻已經唔再身處係飛髮舖。286Please respect copyright.PENANAfIv942pbee
286Please respect copyright.PENANArkpdNH1b5E
清涼山?但呢度雪山嚟架喎。286Please respect copyright.PENANA4Ctztk6UFw
286Please respect copyright.PENANA3eA3HOHecl
我落在積雪面上,兩腳立即插入雪中,深度差不多到膝頭哥。286Please respect copyright.PENANA8kAPyEe1iF
286Please respect copyright.PENANAZ1q3Rmufy5
我呢刻仲戇膠膠,以為去到雪山好撚出奇,屌你老母,我仲未知原來飛劍送咗我出太空。286Please respect copyright.PENANAwMs0mzqJvf
286Please respect copyright.PENANAmkHx62UkHG
俾啲心理準備我得唔得!