The things I hate. - I hate being empty. | Penana

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#8

I hate being empty.

savandler

May 17, 2025

22

1 Min Read

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I hate being emotional.

I hate being vulnerable.

I hate being empty.

I hate it because,

It gives someone the chance to hurt you.

It always hurts.

As much as I hate being empty,

I hate hurting more.

I’ve been empty for five years.

Never feeling,

Never caring.

Never trusting.

Only crying after the buildup of months explodes.

I learned that everyone leaves you at ten,

When the most important person left, C.W.

I learned then it was better to never feel than hurt every day.

So I have to thank her for teaching me that.

I wouldn’t be me without her lesson,

always looming over me,

Ever present,

Never leaving.

Why can’t I forget the things that hurt me the most?

Why can’t I stop being empty?

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Table of Contents

#1 C.W. I hate the memories I still have.

#2 I hate how I feel.

#3 I hate the lies I tell every day.

#4 I hate my philophobia.

#5 I hate the distance.

#6 I hate waking up.

#7 I hate you C.W.

#8 I hate being empty.

#9 I hate that I can’t cry anymore.

#10 The real payment.