你好，我是莊坌但。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3PG5y2Vet
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJWJR3y7bfL
等等，你現在一定「噗嗤」的笑了出來，然後想著這是什麼白痴名字啊？485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVSjEGy1AnO
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo5EXKRAh2G
對，我也覺得這名字很白痴，尤其這還是我爸整整一年叫我兒子，終於在我一歲整時，去找個算命師特別算出來的名字，據說是九五之尊的好名字。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgwX5DK4yff
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqGV8C3phj
我覺得這應該是九五加滿的屁名字，九五個屁。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDiis248jKN
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMDhtRdXzr
再說說當我爸第二天再帶我去找那個算命師時，那個算命師竟然被警察抄掉了。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHpOFqIrFPc
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsib8lQYEeQ
媽的，在我面前被抄掉耶。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGaa8MT6hZ4
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkDzZ5neJSK
我想這件事絕對對我造成很大的創傷，不然我也不會把一歲發生的事記到現在了。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCxz1UvoeL
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRlP6mLYQZ
更別說每次的自我介紹了，那簡直是地獄。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYFrZjIvt48
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3ZQuWt5Xy
「大家好，我叫……黑板上的就是我的名字。」我總是低著頭，不想看到班上同學討論我名字的嘴臉，那會讓我不小心上社會新聞頭版。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAeZYS6wOjj
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9l72sCAiKm
小學一年級，同學看不懂我的名字，還有種「你好屌喔」的感覺。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIpNbuuwrx9
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFeYQ9AGnB
到了小學六年級，那真的很恐怖。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcRFGPFbXfV
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvQz3QvsFBQ
「喂，那叫莊什麼但？」一個看起來長大會拿刀跟別人問好的同學，轉頭問一個年紀輕輕就戴了看起來和戴起來度數都超深的眼鏡的同學。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6TPdYzILZH
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4yUoiXrhVj
「坌，念起來就跟笨蛋的笨一樣。」戴眼鏡的同學想都沒想就講出來。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3NDpJbXJzX
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9PKCdYvt3a
全班開始爆笑，我只能站在台上傻笑，一直笑，不然我會想掐死那個戴眼鏡的同學。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZWlgRwPiYQ
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZt7BMRgsu
請把這個畫面重播，這也是我國高中自我介紹時，所發生的慘劇。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzXQfNsm3hL
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmURok6PalW
而我的綽號，也一路走來，始終如一的「笨蛋」加上一個會心一笑。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1vzN3XLyo
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJWncnhg5Q9
大學聯誼時，我想我就像是在地獄被天使笑吧。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3BphsWWv7A
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7pzoLEvYir
「你好，我是……」485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2NZwOhqYaW
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkUvuLdbjm
「他的名字叫莊坌但喔！超厲害的對不對？坌就是大坌坑文化那個坌，但就是但是的那個但，所以我們都叫他笨蛋喔，超屌的對不對？」485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSKe4LrXJEi
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGsA7lyCWS
室友真是幫我介紹的相當好……個屁！485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdrK1pUaGLV
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ30fqGExdXh
我就只能傻愣愣的笑，然後對面女生就摀著嘴笑。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsruVKFNYLj
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ25Rynf3pOu
偏偏，我的長相比普通還普通，也沒有有錢的老爸，更沒有找男人屁眼的癖好，所以我一直沒有女朋友。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOgY8CLiofN
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJEOMLSx8H6
畢竟，誰也不想叫「笨蛋的女朋友」吧？485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnZqVRtE7lT
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgz0vhiAj8g
再說說我的人生吧，這名字絕對是個詛咒！485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlIhEWT0wBh
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtv2Mu5fMCH
從小體適能1600跑走就是我的惡夢，更別說在那段期間我身體的抵抗力還會自動升級一個level！485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxAKxaKQPkn
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdeJNeOFPT7
此時你一定會想，抵抗力提升有啥不好？485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzQv1z4Y8Ah
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJnExfgqiGx
不好啊非常的不好啊！485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡArq0Q0Mcn2
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3XXMDCqayK
感冒簡直跟我是好碰友，我家擺的藥也簡直可以開一間藥局了。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ85etPXFFY5
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwPdbepVlOQ
而體育老師的規定，只要身體不舒服就可以不用參加，前提是，他會陪著你去保健室。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡocosXdc4ai
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMbrSh1iWE
但是，就算測體適能前一天，我的鼻子還在被鼻涕強姦，只要一覺醒來，我就能夠用鼻子呼吸，然後痰也會自動消失，肚子痛什麼的也一併痊癒！485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpaaG9g3mNO
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT442ChAUSS
然後我當然只能哀怨的等著老師點到我的名字，接著緩緩的跑完1600……或是走完。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqCqlk9T6j
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmXRX6R9d7L
出了社會，總是得找份工作。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhRvxquKGwx
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRc1gHvcwGU
我自己買了台50CC通勤。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBcEozIcTmH
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM8OdpOFZ44
但我想它跟我一樣，體弱多病。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7olQfQjeWG
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmq9JBnHKf5
常常停個紅燈後，它就不想動了，所以我得一個月去車行一次，不然我就只能走路去上班。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSYVfckysps
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu6RfBu8BSc
而且我想，它是台只要載別人就會很威猛的50CC。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNRCQXlB7R
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhv85OcpLQa
「坌但我今天坐公車來，等等載我回家喔。」485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNqsG4Z9PlN
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyeAELkd4zS
「喔，不過我的50CC很爛，有可能一半就掛了喔。」485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTv2kjcbiQi
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1EzHwqwNi
「哎呀，沒差啦，真的掛了再說。」485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJz2xN8osL5
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3YwPOn6YCz
然後，我很順利的將同事載回去，而我家的50CC在路上連熄火都沒有。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwb08znc9k
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhTtCgHToge
「沒很爛啊，聽它引擎的聲音感覺很猛咧。」同事在他家門前這樣說。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKb6VIaL9my
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtagalUcT2c
我發動50CC，然後同事關門。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgR94oGib3Q
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWm0uAZ4x4n
它熄火，我傻眼。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3Urw7CuhS
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKgmxTj3k2I
好險我跟我同事回家的路是同一條，所以我一邊緩緩的牽著它回家，一邊罵著它這台竟然給主人熄火的50CC。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPc7G6oxWHf
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRCVkbuUAap
當然，出了社會還是沒有女朋友。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvdqP5b5VmV
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh6KtEpBTri
畢竟誰也不想當「笨蛋的女朋友」乃至於「笨蛋的老婆」吧。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTIlUIrWu3g
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqcmefdgKnJ
但叫坌但又不是我的錯！485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuf6JF4zvs3
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy1lqcFtzeq
我無聊環顧著新租來的房子──前一棟因為地震垮了，隔壁的房子頂多家具壞掉，偏偏就我的整棟垮掉──看到了我目前用不到，以後可能也用不到的雙人沙發。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPQB1sKHOkw
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbanklxtIsQ
我打開筆電，百無聊賴的看著日本的動畫，也許我還是希望能夠像裡面的主角一樣，開個後宮吧？485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWbXYfJff9
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKHACweakjn
不過那就叫「笨蛋的後宮」了，想到這裡，我竟然不自禁的笑了出來，笑到眼淚都飆了出來。485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzaPlfSYzkJ
485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2aU3ygwAfl
混帳，一個人的人生哪是名字能夠決定的啊！485Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SpthyVL0w
Penana
search
Loginarrow_drop_down
Registerarrow_drop_down
