這種劇情發展怎麼跟日本毒撚動漫十分相似，突然有個陌生女子在家中出現，然後同居。這種既異想天開又陳腔濫調的劇情，連我在講故台看到都會唾棄。若是毒撚甚至是一般男生絕對會點首答允，這樁美事發生十個男生九個都嚮往，剩下一個應該是同性戀。不好意思，我是第十一個。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgTRAzgUk5
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡelTcxd7F6i
作為一名A0毒撚當然想盡快交女朋友擺脫這個稱號，但論到同居我絕不同意。先撇開她是一個不知從何而來的陌生人，與女生同居這種事沒你想像中那麼美好。為何我知道?全因我之前與家姐同住十幾年，徹底了解與女生這種生物在同一屋簷下是甚麼狀況。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU0NUW7eSPA
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYCNznYpFYI
女生與你老媽不同，她們不是照顧你忍讓你的角色，早上搶洗手間，晚上搶電視，半夜在床上與男朋友講電話使你無法入睡，還沒算上其他破壞形象的行為。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oHAaDSBXD
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrZcw5FUTI
可能你會說家姐是有血緣關係無法與其他女生相提並論，起初我也是這樣以為，但實際例子往往是最好的論證。有一年暑假，家姐的同學來了我家住了幾星期。家姐的同學長得非常可愛，但這個印象僅維持了幾天，往後的日子仿如多了另一位家姐一樣，我平日遇到的痛苦乘以雙倍。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAFd84PgE7t
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFXOrZ8WuZg
因此我對與女生同居一事只有一個看法，女生的形象率先崩壞，然後你的生活亦隨之崩壞。可能是我太偏激，抑或是我對上述女生本身沒有多餘的遐想。即使今天要與我同居的女生是岑月寧，我還是會拒絕，我怕會破壞她在我心目中的形象。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmDgse3HlN3
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpoFsKHoFwJ
「你傻架?你話係度住我就會俾你住架啦?就算我肯，我老母都唔肯啦。」我將老媽二字搬出來。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfNGW109QAH
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj1faS02N4j
「即係你阿媽肯俾我係度住，你就肯?」她抓我說話的漏洞。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡysIJuY5PkV
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsblZ5iA2Uh
我心裡想著老媽怎麼可能答允，我就放長雙眼看她怎麼垂頭喪氣的離開。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKLzm36ohPv
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2fIP2X3EgK
「睇下我老母點應你囉。」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ0XOZmsdJl
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaM6Yj20BDf
我跟她說老媽在上班，要十二點才回來，讓她在客廳等。我趕緊換回衣服，然後自顧的走到廚房從櫃中拿出杯麵，打開杯麵提起熱水壺倒水進去。我提著杯麵進房間，打算邊吃邊看伍公子的公子玩walking dead。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVnCbezKFF5
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0MkYNXtyia
想不到她跟著我進房間，我回頭望向她，只見她望著我手上的杯麵嚥口水…261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTWG5ZlUw3V
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvM5o8KscKo
「又點啊?想食啊?」我問。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7M54GQsCJW
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoI8v0ziDvN
她按著肚輕輕點頭。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ZhAH5EFsz
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNc7Neun1Z0
「又話自己係仙子，乜仙子會肚餓架咩?」我嘲諷著說。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQZ88R9UIT
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWRdWBD681N
「唔食咪唔食囉，好叻咩!」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO9AWr3FJ6n
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1lyyZdVRRT
想不到她是如此倔強，我沒理會她繼續享用杯麵及公子玩。吃完後打算扔垃圾走出房間時，發現她坐在沙發一邊按著肚一邊怒視著我。她的眼神兇悍得猶如我是她仇人一樣，我怕了她，把垃圾扔掉後，便從櫃子裡拿出另一個杯麵，還注滿熱水送到她面前。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡquLeW204r9
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLkkMXtsEOw
「嗱，食啦，廢事你好似隻餓鬼咁啤實我。」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx8gnOLzBQn
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNGvwPMZHA
「邊個話我肚餓。」她口嫌體正直，雙手已經捧著杯麵。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBU7rZiUi75
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK1ndyCeCLR
看著她這種反差意外地帶點可愛。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXJFabJMFu2
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXblSaqkZoZ
她打開杯麵用鼻吸了一口問:261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3bdyaNjo99
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsYh3kNPKI
「辣架?」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bQdwSvwlG
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZEYs1P3jO9
我家的杯麵一向由我包辦，而我只會吃合味道的香辣海鮮味，要在我家找到別的口味是不可能的。我看她神情驟變便說:261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrIiuDpC9gu
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YM4CDVnpy
「唔食得辣啊?咁唔好食囉。」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJ2Ee9rmOn
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCuIP8pEAW8
她聽到後反而大口的把麵條吸入，看她吃得滿頭大汗就覺得有點好笑。這種杯麵的辣連譚仔十小辣都不如，居然有人會吃到出汗。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡREEFvsvJgK
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1WF9dqwF1n
我看她雙唇變得紅彤微腫，便倒了杯水給她，她接過水杯說:261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkVfTdg7SKP
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZV9xlFeN0e
「唔該。」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvqvxqTf8HJ
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtv9nzD2XpS
「唔駛，我唔該你就真，俾我發現原來有人咁渣，連合味道嘅辣都頂唔住。」我笑著說。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVYTJCDcNVh
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ19Zv7rTj8W
「好好笑咩!?」她突然怒吼。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV6lnAyghh3
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLpnYg0dzzL
我被她的神情嚇一跳，收起了嬉笑的嘴臉…261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSsrfBw7RLy
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDrPd7cBGkK
「你咁嘅態度對女仔，睇死你一定冇女朋友啦。」她噴出一句。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdLJdKPIJwU
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAfkL2dCEWO
她這一句完全是我的致命傷，我不知如何反駁。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUWVfyFE88U
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvRSPzT1gxD
「唔出聲即係我講中啦。」她接連的攻勢讓我快招架不住。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOs4RTF86G4
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0jD3W6fssE
被她說穿事實，我無法裝腔作勢…261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtFeKc4tac1
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlzfXlkBmbn
「係啦係啦，你啱晒啦得未，我無拍過拖就係原罪，你地有拖拍嘅咪即管笑囉!」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXAkEXtSnQw
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7gGQDAWMXS
我突然想起今早韓信他們也攻擊我這一點，說完我垂頭回到房間裡再沒跟她講話。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxK5S46jBep
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdd9rJbr0K2
尷尬的氣氛維持良久，直到聽到開門聲，老媽終於回來…261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOPfAC24YcY
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSn2O4mOiib
老媽回來便看到那位女生，問我:261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAW7RWm6I7O
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu0waykKkSM
「阿仔，呢位邊個嚟?」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyTgK8KNBtp
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡClh5iqbael
「你問我?你不如問下你帶返嚟個茶…」我說到一半嘴巴一隻手被捂著。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm4D7LwbpO2
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKVvqQ3xNJC
是她阻止了我，然後她把我老媽拉到廚房小聲的密談，我站在客廳聽不到對話內容。片刻後她們出來，我老媽對著我說:261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP48akjUEcs
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vFaNYuqiN
「仔，之後曦…啊唔係，呢位茶小姐會係度住一排。」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10wzfwb39T
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vlrvLITsy
WTF!?老媽你搞甚麼?居然會讓她住下來?261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlb1ypME37L
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKN0Hx8ADcM
「吓!?點解啊?三唔識七點解要俾佢住?邊有咁多地方俾佢瞓?」我愕然的問。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYkpzrU2uUB
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQdLcrdlSG
「你咪理咁多啦，同埋你執返上格床啲野佢瞓返你家姐張床咪得囉。」老媽四兩撥千斤的化解我的問題。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWtFUux9DsO
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ75IU3LWdM3
現在同居還不夠，還要同房是嗎?我完全無法接受，顯然我的抗議無法撼動我老媽，我便抓了那女生到一旁…261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIiaGF6xS23
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfsH1RZ5aG0
「喂!你好講做左啲咩搞到我老母咁順攤?」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95i3Cb64F1
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPOiqtVYrjR
「我都話左我係茶碗仙子，呢啲野難唔到我，係你唔信我咋嘛。」她囂張的道。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bHKiyuR4q
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhIQxleq5SO
「仲有我唔係叫喂，叫我做茶小姐!」她接著說。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrSrLiZ12js
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC3uCYIVg1g
「茶你老…」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQAjlHCZ2Gc
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn6T4u5G4o5
「阿仔，今晚你瞓廳啦，俾人地女仔瞓房啊，聽日返嚟要執好上格床啊。」老媽打斷我的同時下了不人道的命令。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡatuRJfbjoW
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ9PGyDbYOZ
我不解為何要讓出我的床，怎麼說都應該是她睡在客廳吧…261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnU1taaXmWN
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMfO0eBstu1
「瞓廳啦你。」她擺出欠打的表情說。261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI5UGXdcyBH
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfoXxWRibgc
「你都痴線，我今晚老虎蟹都瞓房。」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdqBMVzbCTS
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgjvR1yNRha
我絕不退讓，可是強硬姿態敵不過她下一句…261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmoshDu0Sx
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk1gh6DendI
「今晚想同我同床瞓啊?咸濕仔…」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo3FUGeZ5lF
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSGOZip8YsY
我不知道她是故意挑逗還是隨口說，換著別人恐怕早就把她吃掉，可是我在這方面是個廢物，面對這種事情就當機不懂反應，她看我呆掉便說:261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTFhQsj80D
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcarqVht5B5
「你唔係真係想啊嘛?發夢啦你，同我死出廳瞓!」261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSag5Jw58yF
261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuPDZp5zCQJ
砰!房門大力關上，就這樣我與我的床相隔一道門，只好認命的睡在沙發。唉，我究竟做錯了甚麼落得如此下場，果然與女生同居就不會有好日子過…261Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOHcju5iXzM
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