好痛。269Please respect copyright.PENANAMiqIhw3ZTd
269Please respect copyright.PENANAI7meZsZjzL
好痛,卻哭不出來。269Please respect copyright.PENANAGS43VjQEJX
269Please respect copyright.PENANAJKtGK86SyN
眼淚會讓人迷路。自從爸爸離家後,媽媽總是會對我這麼說。269Please respect copyright.PENANAHY90eOSxeX
269Please respect copyright.PENANABNxJlz7Cph
或許是因為如此,我才會忘了怎麼哭泣。269Please respect copyright.PENANAcAeNGr1cf6
269Please respect copyright.PENANAIYSgXL568E
但,即使哭不出來,國一的那堂體育課,我的膝蓋仍綻開了血淋淋的傷口;而那位名叫艾瑪的同班同學,才會向呆坐在地上的我搭話。269Please respect copyright.PENANAJ46n8jbT14
269Please respect copyright.PENANA43B9d81yw3
『你現在在哪裡?』269Please respect copyright.PENANAWngDkGNtjV
269Please respect copyright.PENANAo2TvuqQRD1
說出這句令人摸不著頭緒的話語的,是因為孤僻的個性而在班上被欺負過幾次的陰森少女。269Please respect copyright.PENANAlNStC1SGr9
269Please respect copyright.PENANAydTQOuozJa
雖然不受歡迎,卻長得很漂亮。墨水似的柔軟黑色長髮、洋娃娃一樣的細緻五官、怕被發現一般的淡淡薰衣草香。269Please respect copyright.PENANAeGn6Hmrgee
269Please respect copyright.PENANASHHgaUqObZ
她微微掀起裙角,露出左腳的膝蓋。269Please respect copyright.PENANAOUHe8tVa6y
269Please respect copyright.PENANAGw5HjadHFE
一塊紗布包裹著那裡。269Please respect copyright.PENANA8RKjV1gBXp
269Please respect copyright.PENANA7Hf1NEvp8j
『我們都在這裡呢,露娜。』她向我微笑。269Please respect copyright.PENANASmySxKS0by
269Please respect copyright.PENANARNtyy5qVhf
如此怪異的說話方式,或許就是她會被欺負的原因吧。但我並不介意,因為我想我們在班上都一樣格格不入。269Please respect copyright.PENANAZGoUYhDJhw
269Please respect copyright.PENANAwbm9BvxlrX
後來,她陪我一起到保健室。看見我沒有像其他同學一樣把她趕走,她似乎很開心。269Please respect copyright.PENANAFToD4YNw4h
269Please respect copyright.PENANAuKlliN8yPi
從此以後,她變得只黏在我身邊。269Please respect copyright.PENANAFDkyE8N9As
269Please respect copyright.PENANAKCq81RgszS
我發現我們有許多相似之處。除了都很安靜以外,我們還喜歡看書,也喜歡畫畫。269Please respect copyright.PENANADN6z19XPtO
269Please respect copyright.PENANA61gv1gtcgu
她買了一本筆記本,與我在上課時互傳、輪流塗鴉。我很喜歡艾瑪的塗鴉,她會畫她養的短毛貓高斯,以及她跟姐姐、媽媽——是的,我們都沒有爸爸。高斯這個名字是她姐姐取的,她的姐姐似乎很聰明,在鎮上的大學裡做大腦相關的研究。269Please respect copyright.PENANAQvolbsobFI
269Please respect copyright.PENANAf08vIlLGPx
轉眼間,我們就迎來國一升國二的暑假。放假後,我跟艾瑪常去不同地方玩,有時去逛書店,有時去看電影。269Please respect copyright.PENANA6wy9wSAsjz
269Please respect copyright.PENANAFES3Ub2ttt
一次,我們去參觀科博館。那天艾瑪的話突然變得很多,到處向我介紹姐姐告訴過她的知識。269Please respect copyright.PENANAxWyKsp8kdN
269Please respect copyright.PENANAGBgQJ0dNAe
我記得她站在科博館二樓的大腦模型前面,平時暗沉沉的眼睛閃閃發光。269Please respect copyright.PENANABEByfA3Izy
269Please respect copyright.PENANApjXGtMy7ib
『露娜,你現在在哪裡?』她這麼問我。269Please respect copyright.PENANACSml49joPK
269Please respect copyright.PENANA4mV05cTpEP
又是這個奇怪的問題。269Please respect copyright.PENANAfZ2zkmDrkl
269Please respect copyright.PENANAen0c8OiZcm
她逕自接著說道,人們在某個時刻的思緒和感受,好比位在一張巨大地圖上的一個點;而那張地圖,解釋了我們從何而來,可以往哪裡去。269Please respect copyright.PENANAld8yuwI48C
269Please respect copyright.PENANAWZLPZp4SnX
可惜,那張地圖不是平的,而是立體的,或4、5,甚至更高次元的,所以科學家暫時還找不到它。若是找到了,人們就能知道怎麼從這件事想到那件事,怎麼從高興走到難過,怎麼從憂鬱走到康復。269Please respect copyright.PENANAdwbXfYhAWV
269Please respect copyright.PENANAccbF9gOy0g
這些都是她姐姐告訴她的。當然,我一點也不知道她在說什麼。269Please respect copyright.PENANABBFvfUJlVo
269Please respect copyright.PENANAfcr7rPjKqA
開學後,我們又度過了數週平平無奇的學校生活。269Please respect copyright.PENANAd9Hj4EZ2OF
269Please respect copyright.PENANAyQxYSS1ufK
上課、塗鴉、放學時一起回家,一切都看似毫無異狀。269Please respect copyright.PENANAMlqDGiwfoO
269Please respect copyright.PENANA0UpmkQxzYq
然而,隨著國二的尾聲到來,那件事情發生了。269Please respect copyright.PENANAHLsjzEDdad
269Please respect copyright.PENANAykqUQ9KYwU
高斯死了。269Please respect copyright.PENANAySuTHxaprT
269Please respect copyright.PENANApa64r6Bpp1
這是在艾瑪因為難過而兩個禮拜都沒來學校後,才從她口中得知的事情。269Please respect copyright.PENANAqej6PSYBFx
269Please respect copyright.PENANAB9oV05pIr7
『就因為這樣?』269Please respect copyright.PENANALTf60C7tac
269Please respect copyright.PENANA67ffm1cDjl
那節下課,站在艾瑪的座位前,我脫口而出這句話。269Please respect copyright.PENANAGiP9DXtTbx
269Please respect copyright.PENANA7MbDUtlwHV
我只是覺得她不因該讓自己那麼傷心。269Please respect copyright.PENANAdEfSfsRmG5
269Please respect copyright.PENANAR8etTOTdGl
因為,眼淚會讓人迷路。269Please respect copyright.PENANA5gSUufF812
269Please respect copyright.PENANAwPnOaKpPaq
然而,艾瑪似乎無法理解我的意思。直到我看見她的臉垮下來,眼眶裡有淚水在打轉,我才知道我搞砸了。269Please respect copyright.PENANAb8IDz8BSMp
269Please respect copyright.PENANAACwop9z3UE
後來,直到放暑假,她都沒有再來學校。我想了想,決定傳訊息向她道歉,但她只回了一次「沒關係」,就再也沒有回過我之後的訊息了。269Please respect copyright.PENANA79S8zIPE4c
269Please respect copyright.PENANAodMnmNwQAa
暑假過後,三年級的開學日,我再次遇見艾瑪。269Please respect copyright.PENANABNCShm1Wi2
269Please respect copyright.PENANAshJWZ7VpE9
她的樣子變得古怪。她的眼神更加沒有生氣、更不愛說話,沒人知道她發生了什麼事。大家都避開她,而我也一直找不到機會跟她搭話,只能默默的觀察著她。那本筆記本上再也沒有新的塗鴉。269Please respect copyright.PENANABh281NziJE
269Please respect copyright.PENANAVGxFxZJGJJ
畢業後,我們又恰巧進入同一所高中。她就在我隔壁班。每次我經過,都會看見她一次比一次消瘦。269Please respect copyright.PENANApGToOfx2eq
269Please respect copyright.PENANAUGrJeAR7hf
不久後,他們班的傳聞就傳到我們班上,說她得了癌症、她被家人虐待、她被附身了。有一次,我在辦公室聽到老師們聊到艾瑪,說她好像去了奇怪的教會。269Please respect copyright.PENANACnoelPVw7g
269Please respect copyright.PENANAFCamQ3FG6V
高二接近尾聲的一日放學,我經過他們班,看到裡面空空如也。在她的座位上,我看見有幾束鮮花和燒過的蠟燭擺在那。269Please respect copyright.PENANANmFCrUTA7k
269Please respect copyright.PENANACEK4RchyQR
艾瑪去世了。269Please respect copyright.PENANArJ2W5MzkzD
269Please respect copyright.PENANAqqe475LdOj
她是DMT中毒致死的,DMT是一種毒品的樣子,鎮上的報導是這麼說的。我不知道艾瑪為什麼會吸毒,也不知道她從哪裡弄來這種毒藥。269Please respect copyright.PENANAZf4Tpc9DxP
269Please respect copyright.PENANApv0dWqfD5U
然而,我告訴自己不能哭,不能迷路。大家都得在自己的路上繼續前進。269Please respect copyright.PENANAf3iF7eOzHm
269Please respect copyright.PENANAi6ttR0O0YL
上課、作業、考試,一成不變的生活因此繼續運轉著,隔壁班似乎也一下子就忘了她。269Please respect copyright.PENANAl6YdtyobyD
269Please respect copyright.PENANASTRYd1hzgW
但,就在放假前一週的生物課上,老師跟我們分享了一個科學上的新發現。269Please respect copyright.PENANAJJQsjPOfzy
269Please respect copyright.PENANA0OgqdvB90t
他說科學家發現了一個多達數千億維的空間。這個空間記錄了人類大腦任何可能的思想狀態。科學家稱這個空間「意識宇宙」。269Please respect copyright.PENANAZb8SfCgZTc
269Please respect copyright.PENANAwQppIBlbf1
當下,我想起了去科博館玩的那次,艾瑪所說的那張巨大地圖,還有怎麼從高興走到難過、怎麼從憂鬱走到康復。269Please respect copyright.PENANAgKCdLx3EUw
269Please respect copyright.PENANA9WDttk7Lpn
我感到一陣反胃。在以內急當藉口離開教室後,我跑向廁所。269Please respect copyright.PENANAk5l1zBEQy9
269Please respect copyright.PENANAAza3FgLDYU
跑著跑著,跟艾瑪有關的回憶不斷湧現。269Please respect copyright.PENANA177H8I5nL1
269Please respect copyright.PENANAgGL8SwzpZB
首先,是我與艾瑪的最後一次對話。那時的我只是希望艾瑪不要因為難過而迷失了,但我現在卻隱約明白,有什麼注定讓艾瑪流淚。269Please respect copyright.PENANAEMwFtIc5yH
269Please respect copyright.PENANAhjEq91tz13
接著,是我們經歷過的種種。艾瑪和我暑假時常去的書店,艾瑪在筆記本上的塗鴉,還有艾瑪在那堂體育課向我說的那句話。269Please respect copyright.PENANAGx7u7PTw12
269Please respect copyright.PENANAmemitUGmSs
我頓時恍然大悟。艾瑪讓我看她膝蓋的傷,並不是想說我們受傷的地方一樣——269Please respect copyright.PENANA859f6b5MCv
269Please respect copyright.PENANATB1PT3nepw
而是想告訴我,在那張以數億個維度所描繪的地圖上,我們在同一個地方。269Please respect copyright.PENANAPkMJnl6KYx
269Please respect copyright.PENANAKAZsyY4Jj6
我們一樣痛。269Please respect copyright.PENANAnyCsXLeJQC
269Please respect copyright.PENANAejl2lXsb2m
——我現在在哪裡?269Please respect copyright.PENANATnVzZcwLAg
269Please respect copyright.PENANAcn7gWAEaEa
好痛。269Please respect copyright.PENANAkIfrkeob05
269Please respect copyright.PENANARTXzTI1C8v
好痛,卻哭不出來。269Please respect copyright.PENANA7a3ot2kkrs
269Please respect copyright.PENANAWThr9rswsr
胸口就像膝蓋那時的傷口一樣刺痛;我停步在走廊上,難受的蹲下。269Please respect copyright.PENANARyZOG5zhyQ
269Please respect copyright.PENANAw8HTLhkcZb
我好希望當我抬頭時,能看見艾瑪對我微笑。269Please respect copyright.PENANA6lMsf20uwx
269Please respect copyright.PENANANmO2gbZe7W
但,倘若她還活著,或許只會回我一句「就因為這樣」。269Please respect copyright.PENANA8785qUWkvr
269Please respect copyright.PENANAvYFkkxCecj
好痛,好憤怒。269Please respect copyright.PENANAfLmkRo7jEW
269Please respect copyright.PENANAKsa2sllsEY
艾瑪迷失時,我拋棄了她。269Please respect copyright.PENANAr3qpSAixU9
269Please respect copyright.PENANAk7yhCNg7DS
我就這樣放手了,導致了這場悲劇。269Please respect copyright.PENANA1Zywj3fFfC
269Please respect copyright.PENANALYsqLBlAtj
艾瑪死後,我仍假裝自己沒有迷路。269Please respect copyright.PENANAmorHHSI0mp
269Please respect copyright.PENANAPfa2Xv6c7W
假裝不珍惜她,作為我曾經最好的朋友。269Please respect copyright.PENANAnfIfvAjFTl
269Please respect copyright.PENANAFf5pkHDy23
突然,彷彿不留給我任何喘息的餘地一般,我的手機傳來震動。269Please respect copyright.PENANAizg9mfupsZ
269Please respect copyright.PENANAueBHzy1Cy8
我懺抖著從口袋中拿出手機,將恍惚的目光投向螢幕。269Please respect copyright.PENANAOnBN4cty0d
269Please respect copyright.PENANAzoVQkEAAVx
我看見通知欄顯示的屬名和訊息內容。一時之間,我所有的思緒都停滯了。269Please respect copyright.PENANAvuM8uRnicR
269Please respect copyright.PENANA6eIxoX5jBu
『艾瑪:』269Please respect copyright.PENANAJZgYuZcfx8
269Please respect copyright.PENANAqlKpIlByW9
『來地圖上找我。』269Please respect copyright.PENANABcWoNJYWE1
269Please respect copyright.PENANAjEdheDxzjq