好痛。242Please respect copyright.PENANAz3imsX550Y
242Please respect copyright.PENANAL7FSawdwSD
好痛,卻哭不出來。242Please respect copyright.PENANAWQ1VAbvTWL
242Please respect copyright.PENANAvyTu7rVYZo
眼淚會讓人迷路。自從爸爸離家後,媽媽總是會對我這麼說。242Please respect copyright.PENANAuJ73IDxRgp
242Please respect copyright.PENANAHWNuMOoja5
或許是因為如此,我才會忘了怎麼哭泣。242Please respect copyright.PENANAI9HqyC0KXf
242Please respect copyright.PENANAZkuXBpKhAa
但,即使哭不出來,國一的那堂體育課,我的膝蓋仍綻開了血淋淋的傷口;而那位名叫艾瑪的同班同學,才會向呆坐在地上的我搭話。242Please respect copyright.PENANAFtTbjzqo4g
242Please respect copyright.PENANAcIPUDqPHqe
『你現在在哪裡?』242Please respect copyright.PENANAAqNO4zwsHz
242Please respect copyright.PENANAYK1YqefEgu
說出這句令人摸不著頭緒的話語的,是因為孤僻的個性而在班上被欺負過幾次的陰森少女。242Please respect copyright.PENANALOg2iyLX38
242Please respect copyright.PENANAfis8r3h1vU
雖然不受歡迎,卻長得很漂亮。墨水似的柔軟黑色長髮、洋娃娃一樣的細緻五官、怕被發現一般的淡淡薰衣草香。242Please respect copyright.PENANAgSAbYJrjsX
242Please respect copyright.PENANAhe3ZE0Dy1L
她微微掀起裙角,露出左腳的膝蓋。242Please respect copyright.PENANApisRmZZGZR
242Please respect copyright.PENANAb0rD9OqMcL
一塊紗布包裹著那裡。242Please respect copyright.PENANADgQ3OJ0x1I
242Please respect copyright.PENANAs8eGID1fXi
『我們都在這裡呢,露娜。』她向我微笑。242Please respect copyright.PENANAe5IVZbxvLV
242Please respect copyright.PENANAnT8qgSFYAU
如此怪異的說話方式,或許就是她會被欺負的原因吧。但我並不介意,因為我想我們在班上都一樣格格不入。242Please respect copyright.PENANAW7uBStibt4
242Please respect copyright.PENANAZBaJ9ZTWvv
後來,她陪我一起到保健室。看見我沒有像其他同學一樣把她趕走,她似乎很開心。242Please respect copyright.PENANAV4IOsW7rVb
242Please respect copyright.PENANAUmT84Ug0E8
從此以後,她變得只黏在我身邊。242Please respect copyright.PENANAzyZYbmpeMU
242Please respect copyright.PENANARPeMINUE4F
我發現我們有許多相似之處。除了都很安靜以外,我們還喜歡看書,也喜歡畫畫。242Please respect copyright.PENANAjkRL0F4VHX
242Please respect copyright.PENANAm722gnCfGU
她買了一本筆記本,與我在上課時互傳、輪流塗鴉。我很喜歡艾瑪的塗鴉,她會畫她養的短毛貓高斯,以及她跟姐姐、媽媽——是的,我們都沒有爸爸。高斯這個名字是她姐姐取的,她的姐姐似乎很聰明,在鎮上的大學裡做大腦相關的研究。242Please respect copyright.PENANAL43imEN9F1
242Please respect copyright.PENANAdLQLAaoS4r
轉眼間,我們就迎來國一升國二的暑假。放假後,我跟艾瑪常去不同地方玩,有時去逛書店,有時去看電影。242Please respect copyright.PENANAIR7qhr5HnU
242Please respect copyright.PENANAnJi3ZMO8Wl
一次,我們去參觀科博館。那天艾瑪的話突然變得很多,到處向我介紹姐姐告訴過她的知識。242Please respect copyright.PENANAXrf3BlTDXW
242Please respect copyright.PENANAY5TC8y3k48
我記得她站在科博館二樓的大腦模型前面,平時暗沉沉的眼睛閃閃發光。242Please respect copyright.PENANAgxMbH2bwmL
242Please respect copyright.PENANAWi1HTvrCjS
『露娜,你現在在哪裡?』她這麼問我。242Please respect copyright.PENANAorUr5JHwjb
242Please respect copyright.PENANAnvEPJ3Ymab
又是這個奇怪的問題。242Please respect copyright.PENANAQWEf8s8UZU
242Please respect copyright.PENANATEMN2VAGok
她逕自接著說道,人們在某個時刻的思緒和感受,好比位在一張巨大地圖上的一個點;而那張地圖,解釋了我們從何而來,可以往哪裡去。242Please respect copyright.PENANApyh5ezgytx
242Please respect copyright.PENANAlDE5wkFG7M
可惜,那張地圖不是平的,而是立體的,或4、5,甚至更高次元的,所以科學家暫時還找不到它。若是找到了,人們就能知道怎麼從這件事想到那件事,怎麼從高興走到難過,怎麼從憂鬱走到康復。242Please respect copyright.PENANA5WEeWGxfbx
242Please respect copyright.PENANA78TANvU53Q
這些都是她姐姐告訴她的。當然,我一點也不知道她在說什麼。242Please respect copyright.PENANAnwZuV6gF4D
242Please respect copyright.PENANAQSEQOyCjyg
開學後,我們又度過了數週平平無奇的學校生活。242Please respect copyright.PENANAPGhbsDeCgi
242Please respect copyright.PENANAc3vu8rwNpu
上課、塗鴉、放學時一起回家,一切都看似毫無異狀。242Please respect copyright.PENANAREzIaWhkLU
242Please respect copyright.PENANA4cVILYvzpJ
然而,隨著國二的尾聲到來,那件事情發生了。242Please respect copyright.PENANAilagaBj0OW
242Please respect copyright.PENANAawnciaQWer
高斯死了。242Please respect copyright.PENANAzblTsakv0z
242Please respect copyright.PENANAKZeGes5OJG
這是在艾瑪因為難過而兩個禮拜都沒來學校後,才從她口中得知的事情。242Please respect copyright.PENANA17MuLI7uhB
242Please respect copyright.PENANAyXS7SzFobd
『就因為這樣?』242Please respect copyright.PENANAidBJl7MIO5
242Please respect copyright.PENANAQhg950TsN1
那節下課,站在艾瑪的座位前,我脫口而出這句話。242Please respect copyright.PENANA6VrtYMlrPF
242Please respect copyright.PENANA45hPgPZNja
我只是覺得她不因該讓自己那麼傷心。242Please respect copyright.PENANA0SKmlp6RZN
242Please respect copyright.PENANA24KpPvy7fa
因為,眼淚會讓人迷路。242Please respect copyright.PENANAFXskRoL5cN
242Please respect copyright.PENANARv7cWo31QF
然而,艾瑪似乎無法理解我的意思。直到我看見她的臉垮下來,眼眶裡有淚水在打轉,我才知道我搞砸了。242Please respect copyright.PENANAKOWafH05Yc
242Please respect copyright.PENANA9Im8joYr7v
後來,直到放暑假,她都沒有再來學校。我想了想,決定傳訊息向她道歉,但她只回了一次「沒關係」,就再也沒有回過我之後的訊息了。242Please respect copyright.PENANAZgrZ8k2JSc
242Please respect copyright.PENANAzk9UwsCrss
暑假過後,三年級的開學日,我再次遇見艾瑪。242Please respect copyright.PENANAdQ90xz7V3w
242Please respect copyright.PENANAii0Jpx8MUa
她的樣子變得古怪。她的眼神更加沒有生氣、更不愛說話,沒人知道她發生了什麼事。大家都避開她,而我也一直找不到機會跟她搭話,只能默默的觀察著她。那本筆記本上再也沒有新的塗鴉。242Please respect copyright.PENANAH9qm5IDiDJ
242Please respect copyright.PENANA4Iz7hybaAX
畢業後,我們又恰巧進入同一所高中。她就在我隔壁班。每次我經過,都會看見她一次比一次消瘦。242Please respect copyright.PENANAUQ8Y4L7TQl
242Please respect copyright.PENANAc6Bnj3F3M4
不久後,他們班的傳聞就傳到我們班上,說她得了癌症、她被家人虐待、她被附身了。有一次,我在辦公室聽到老師們聊到艾瑪,說她好像去了奇怪的教會。242Please respect copyright.PENANAIQHkzkRFvH
242Please respect copyright.PENANAHW8womfw7A
高二接近尾聲的一日放學,我經過他們班,看到裡面空空如也。在她的座位上,我看見有幾束鮮花和燒過的蠟燭擺在那。242Please respect copyright.PENANAtpFEidxuma
242Please respect copyright.PENANA7d7gLRWn91
艾瑪去世了。242Please respect copyright.PENANA2RAstVs7K6
242Please respect copyright.PENANASEUEGWjXUM
她是DMT中毒致死的,DMT是一種毒品的樣子,鎮上的報導是這麼說的。我不知道艾瑪為什麼會吸毒,也不知道她從哪裡弄來這種毒藥。242Please respect copyright.PENANAfLtWqZeGoX
242Please respect copyright.PENANABhtVoA17Xe
然而,我告訴自己不能哭,不能迷路。大家都得在自己的路上繼續前進。242Please respect copyright.PENANAIVBit6GKTR
242Please respect copyright.PENANAY5k4JLb64z
上課、作業、考試,一成不變的生活因此繼續運轉著,隔壁班似乎也一下子就忘了她。242Please respect copyright.PENANAJecXpnmfdW
242Please respect copyright.PENANAjT5HLKj22m
但,就在放假前一週的生物課上,老師跟我們分享了一個科學上的新發現。242Please respect copyright.PENANA4CAg4rDYk7
242Please respect copyright.PENANAuxXfEc5cow
他說科學家發現了一個多達數千億維的空間。這個空間記錄了人類大腦任何可能的思想狀態。科學家稱這個空間「意識宇宙」。242Please respect copyright.PENANA8be39rzsx9
242Please respect copyright.PENANAd8JxAvI5bP
當下,我想起了去科博館玩的那次,艾瑪所說的那張巨大地圖,還有怎麼從高興走到難過、怎麼從憂鬱走到康復。242Please respect copyright.PENANAUhO8IYXVl6
242Please respect copyright.PENANA1aVpguleUF
我感到一陣反胃。在以內急當藉口離開教室後,我跑向廁所。242Please respect copyright.PENANAfATBmEBlZT
242Please respect copyright.PENANAnM5JsISxIY
跑著跑著,跟艾瑪有關的回憶不斷湧現。242Please respect copyright.PENANAag556PyTIv
242Please respect copyright.PENANArrUlSjRprs
首先,是我與艾瑪的最後一次對話。那時的我只是希望艾瑪不要因為難過而迷失了,但我現在卻隱約明白,有什麼注定讓艾瑪流淚。242Please respect copyright.PENANA2PI3gcdES3
242Please respect copyright.PENANAbD6aU1NmSu
接著,是我們經歷過的種種。艾瑪和我暑假時常去的書店,艾瑪在筆記本上的塗鴉,還有艾瑪在那堂體育課向我說的那句話。242Please respect copyright.PENANAcnO56BThhH
242Please respect copyright.PENANAN5leo9MY1D
我頓時恍然大悟。艾瑪讓我看她膝蓋的傷,並不是想說我們受傷的地方一樣——242Please respect copyright.PENANA1a1b3UZk3d
242Please respect copyright.PENANA3yDdzf115f
而是想告訴我,在那張以數億個維度所描繪的地圖上,我們在同一個地方。242Please respect copyright.PENANAsfJ1GOIeIu
242Please respect copyright.PENANAv1g4lf0mVL
我們一樣痛。242Please respect copyright.PENANAs2sISbZH1V
242Please respect copyright.PENANAnL76n68oow
——我現在在哪裡?242Please respect copyright.PENANAP1AycIlBiw
242Please respect copyright.PENANAPoRVADLFQg
好痛。242Please respect copyright.PENANAFdRISre8As
242Please respect copyright.PENANAF5WiwrAy6t
好痛,卻哭不出來。242Please respect copyright.PENANAQVCswTmJwY
242Please respect copyright.PENANALhDS1GunAu
胸口就像膝蓋那時的傷口一樣刺痛;我停步在走廊上,難受的蹲下。242Please respect copyright.PENANANFjfEI5BTV
242Please respect copyright.PENANAC1Csj7rXJR
我好希望當我抬頭時,能看見艾瑪對我微笑。242Please respect copyright.PENANAzx4jqryI2m
242Please respect copyright.PENANAEEbJWBkkhb
但,倘若她還活著,或許只會回我一句「就因為這樣」。242Please respect copyright.PENANAjHi8qsmlGp
242Please respect copyright.PENANAn55tZ3CQi4
好痛,好憤怒。242Please respect copyright.PENANAfRfwuMlDb6
242Please respect copyright.PENANAA5xUugbEDG
艾瑪迷失時,我拋棄了她。242Please respect copyright.PENANAdIJeixQChO
242Please respect copyright.PENANAVCcxHBZeUD
我就這樣放手了,導致了這場悲劇。242Please respect copyright.PENANAFeFhYsyU6l
242Please respect copyright.PENANAr4BqqadSBz
艾瑪死後,我仍假裝自己沒有迷路。242Please respect copyright.PENANAVFrfytlvwm
242Please respect copyright.PENANASpnyJHE7WM
假裝不珍惜她,作為我曾經最好的朋友。242Please respect copyright.PENANAekkBJDfy53
242Please respect copyright.PENANAjPdVvhhkmw
突然,彷彿不留給我任何喘息的餘地一般,我的手機傳來震動。242Please respect copyright.PENANAaAs4p4aCn7
242Please respect copyright.PENANACh2kR4kRgl
我懺抖著從口袋中拿出手機,將恍惚的目光投向螢幕。242Please respect copyright.PENANAbXhrLQ9b2f
242Please respect copyright.PENANAPbGZVf5UYI
我看見通知欄顯示的屬名和訊息內容。一時之間,我所有的思緒都停滯了。242Please respect copyright.PENANARakVgeH2X4
242Please respect copyright.PENANAXBgbCi0ouo
『艾瑪:』242Please respect copyright.PENANA8Zi6n2xqeB
242Please respect copyright.PENANAJZCdkcKegV
『來地圖上找我。』242Please respect copyright.PENANAgjq09GodEz
242Please respect copyright.PENANAjz9kdg2kNi