Doctors' offices have always made me immensely uncomfortable. You never get through immediately; there's always a fifteen minute and up waiting period.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSzoZ2KKyIA
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcIuGKTZmGS
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIf8uO0042E
In that amount of time, someone as imaginative as myself can think a vast number of ways in which something could be severely wrong with me, because you're never at the doctor if you're alright.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwHQSVAaAJN
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3OTWiIQqyE
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKoo5VktEL5
Today, however, I'm at the doctor's office and I'm almost sure that there's nothing physically wrong with me.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Wv0dStgqw
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkkFGuDXKHw
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksr8auvERa
It's what's inside of me that's the problem.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpV8ZdKoeWY
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNh6rLGvWBG
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl16eJkKAs8
You see, I made the brilliant decision to have unprotected sex, which has landed me here, in a doctor's office, wanting to "make sure" that I'm actually pregnant, as if three positive pregnancy tests aren't proof enough. 896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeONVdkc7FC
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMsBEZoCQF
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkoyh07ChrK
Despite the knowledge that it is highly unlikely that I am not pregnant, I still hope; and with that hope comes nervousness.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrh2aHSXuLE
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHH2oCYhOep
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3DhnkHOrQ
My palms are clammy and I'm constantly alternating between bouncing my knees and tapping my feet against the tiled floor. The receptionist is looking at me with a concerned expression, as if expecting me to have a full blown panic attack, and to be honest, I'm somewhere pretty near to that.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5WU4RzY64
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKpQiAW2QBX
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9s18B3ZjJI
In an attempt to calm myself, I pull out my phone and play Candy Crush. It doesn't help. 896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWEAWEzEnQV
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7F9fmX5KO
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXfoBHxmDxP
I plug in my earphones and try to listen to some music, but after two minutes, I realise that I don't even know what the hell I'm listening to; it could be classical music, or rap music. I wouldn't know.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUhTnExFAVR
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgafkAS5I7
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLhHL0KuwZ5
I rip out the earbuds in frustration, and lean back in my chair, closing my eyes.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs4I1CoxLEZ
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm0OrA22J3i
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk6oFC6cS33
"Miss, would you like some water?" the receptionist asks, startling me.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6SgSfuDre
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv1aGGu0Cdd
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFx3RCsub6d
In my fit of irritation, I forgot that she was there.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡswBnnYJJBB
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCrRJgTsbgX
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7kfplhNDen
"Yes, thank you," I reply in what I hope is a calm voice, but even to my own ears, it sounds harsh.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrsS6kZLPKR
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOcfmqm8eYU
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5mucZHFQAh
She dips below the desk and comes back up with a small unopened bottle of water.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ43Mqsv9Sa7
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnhLinipNX7
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4GEJ42pNUy
"Thank you," I say to her, as she passes me the bottle.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwpusGNScGB
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXMY0dJjjnh
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhDSAHSXF6h
"You're welcome," is her reply. She looks as if she wants to say more, but she's cut off by the ringing of her phone.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjnppHFgS3z
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2koscnufvq
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnUbmsVRhwQ
She picks it up, and has the briefest of conversations, before saying, "Dr.Davidson is ready to see you now.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn3T9EWYnLY
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAwZl2j409z
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb5CCuYHsGD
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfev2D8AnOf
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoEJskp198w
*•*•*•*896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlY3t7EWelg
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgnJCbp9x1T
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwLugASO3yV
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbk9F7GYHn
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhd3cm45zd2
I'm shaking like a colt trying to walk for the first time.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAwIM798VR
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwIe1UGmnIX
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡar16JH9F30
"Sit," the doctor insists, pretending not to notice my nervousness.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLCQ9NRaLN1
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbXeMQ2tHxj
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9PwCrxIAAV
"So, tell me exactly what's going on," he says, looking me in the face.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh89O3OLUiY
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkCR8PLQHV2
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ovLFsvKu2
"I fucked without a condom, and now I think I'm pregnant."896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfqNFiDGK7D
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWshHp4yqE6
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMpgWHkOPpK
"Okay," he replies, completely unfazed by my bluntness. "Lets find out," he says, sounding like Dora the Explorer.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCidaFvokWc
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK1idwm0wtO
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXfz7rqmqa
And for some reason, on some level, I don't want to explore this, because it feels as if not investing it will make the problem sublime and diffuse, but I know it won't.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjUUr2f0k6
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSXR9GX0e9g
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgCyh2lDsSY
"Put this on, and change," the doctor tells me, handing me the gown that patients use to cover themselves.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4wGb7i5emi
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeVEtNfPLmH
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ27dNaxfKMt
He does an overall examination before the test, but to be honest, I'm not there; I tell him "no" when he asks if I'm experiencing pain during the breast and pelvic examinations, but apart from that, I'm gone.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsXuw1sLGq
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkK7fvv2UDs
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdMJQdk6JfR
"Okay. It's too early to see the baby doing an external ultrasound, so I'm going to have to do a trans-vaginal ultrasound."896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTnvWBvnB56
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6WWj2ZR32Y
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAw4cHeF0MU
All I hear is the word "ultrasound"; my heart beat skyrockets.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI1s4EvIrqV
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG72ftrODwB
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm71vBjvZ2w
He must be misreading my expression, because he suddenly try's to reassure me.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡORhixHgeEM
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBcsU6IdaKL
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXOoBzem1dk
"It won't be painful—"896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEvSQS7nfyn
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt2hV5HCO76
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbwxOimwRd6
"That's not it. I don't want a baby,"896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCkfYrCuWM
I reply, and god does it feel good to finally say those words out loud to someone.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKPhENDM6b9
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1mJvxfQUzD
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlB6PuXxG2
I've thought them many times, but there's this sense of release that comes with saying it out loud, like taking a shit after holding it in for an entire day (if you're one of those people who finds shitting in public to be absolutely terrifying, such as yours truly).896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoyCqtbT2zk
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxynzW4dhT0
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ETEZXLahn
He gives me a sympathetic look, but says nothing, and for that I'm grateful.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnhDljHLo7c
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv83Aoi2VBJ
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡav6jc7ePmc
What would he say? 'It's okay'? 'You'll be a great mother'? 896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQJO2iGKrr
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV3o7yDx8Ow
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSp18dxK7vP
I hate it when people know absolutely nothing about you, but suddenly become your personal counsellor once they hear a sentence of your life. If I were the kind of person to divulge my personal information and feelings, then maybe, I'd take their advice, but since you they nothing about me, it's just annoying.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAQucsMF5VA
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx3mpIOHNIK
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNZXMCnYYwe
He's talking to me now, preparing for the ultrasound and telling me what will happen, but I can't concentrate on what he's saying.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbv3qs0VS8K
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWgBjk3mW3
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjpMaw6zT1
However, as I feel the cold probe enter me, it feels so... final. Like the final nail to my coffin.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLErlaBIqd
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbCF6wRig2b
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe184GRAqoI
This is it.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlIYcF3Cdbq
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTAVi2KnkzU
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhxGhUAbj8N
He turns off the light so that he can see the image on the ultrasound screen, and that screen is now the only major source of light in the room, begging to be looked at, but I can't do it.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiPc1HucCV8
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrKJFEaaMer
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SZX2BoFPK
"Well..." Dr. Davidson says, sounding surprised, but not in a good way.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oPAwsES8I
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhH91dY3bjt
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3HNgbnuxXw
I start to shake, trembling so hard that the paper covering the cot on which I am laying begins to rattle loudly.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL0zOU6tMmI
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMLQBrtursk
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7J9cWHq5r
"Miss Quinn, the good news is, you're not pregnant", he says.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQBsxVpHZsV
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXfLKegYZC1
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjG3RTWnwqP
I freeze.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnmRRwxiGDs
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtn2u2RA2VW
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hgFu5cmUR
Then I breathe.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXFFgJ7N5hF
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyjIOSaa6o
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zCsTwnAPQ
I let out a loud breath of relief, as relief is my automatic response to hearing something like that in a situation like this.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyx0x85VIoY
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuF8BZECwmt
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhJxTvY4Tgz
However, as soon as that breath is released, I 896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsYjTMtTKUX
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa9lLh6SIfb
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb4Yv9osjdy
1) remember that Dr. Davidson seems unpleasantly surprised, 896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9kdEoGLgoC
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuepV1klNpI
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeCJJhNArgE
2) realise that he said "the good news is"; that means that there's bad news, too, and896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1PMuHwFvy
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMNuHawm8q6
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6BMgxlzKWS
3)realise that he is still inspecting my insides with the probe, frowning at the screen.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡno5FWP1vrX
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa82e8uJdun
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFYzzcZr2Wg
Something isn't right.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIjyKwdsT16
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbhl5bV3yO
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQOtMGrAGS
"Dr. Davidson, what's wrong?" I ask, sounding like a nervous wreck all over again.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiHrPdmXVoN
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE1Rm5E2fuO
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNX2xVhvGbv
He continues to look at the screen, and I can see that he knows exactly what is wrong with me; it's just one of those moments in which you try to figure out how to phrase something in the best way possible so as to lessen the blow.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GbmWaDkNX
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBifqA6Qdtp
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNJp62qWQJ
He sighs, and pulls the probe out, then switches off the machine.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJRaiEQZlyi
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2J9qGjkndM
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnF1FKXanGv
"Your condition is in no way life-threatening, Miss Quinn," he states, it might just cause complications in the future."896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡveTNPzDxEd
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2a9R0wzph
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0hB2uvJ4yq
"Do you mind telling me what my condition is, before I shit myself?" I snarl as he turns on the light and hands me a wad of tissue paper.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFwzM80ceKR
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFjIM3K4GtA
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtvOnJpYODo
His lips twitch. 896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfCYCWu27YL
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo3zIlc9DEf
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2IvdROpIY
"You've been nothing but nervous since you stepped into my office. I said that so that you wouldn't shit yourself."896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnrJILwT7tb
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdv8N9ILbJu
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMAHkXqT4Da
Through my nervousness I have to smile at him.896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNf7p0MzAsh
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpQywXeWntf
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf1BSIIQC2r
"Okay so what do I have?"896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRIYFIrb8q
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21iHWz1N3O
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3zDmiphKke
"Miss Quinn, you have fibroids."896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyRludUAHsN
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtAUfzJhIaT
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ24dNLxh4Dl
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvdCiZoNYnq
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMkDi3vbLLs
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsDjYXeBeHQ
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBFTdZOHKay
896Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Qx6krONWF
