以下是我看到某參賽作品以後，所寫的留言轉正文，供大家參考。
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRMSKM10fUW
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwwlRbqPqW7
感謝參與～169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqPjm2LeDXJ
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcc7lx0Z9BL
老實說，這篇給我的感覺不是十行詩，是散文十行。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJFk4NCodd
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPpwB4goI5T
雖然文章有哲理，但是詩度很低。詩的要素，如節奏、意象、音樂、譬喻都很平淡，甚至欠奉；內容太趨近說明，解釋過多，太黏了。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvyra7IQzSS
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCBi3FtK9yq
～～～～分隔線～～～～169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYyqeRWDR0j
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1nkBJ3yUf5
我回頭看我自己寫的詩，有些也算不上是詩，例如169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡODXFG4cC0M
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfGV4uCG3dg
〈限制和自由〉169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsNCaOrBJfT
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMaE7e9y644
penana.com/article/1024895169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUjNsD6lPEl
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKOuQFUezAC
現在看來，我覺得它不是詩 (但為記錄故，還是收進詩集)。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNw6rJu3T43
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqmWpy7AY6y
詩度 0。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJOKlY7EHB0
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2JjJQrNsO
～～～～分隔線～～～～169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeZSFKr28wo
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxws1PPBtIP
〈問〉169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw0GdAl2kZD
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV3AM01vN8E
penana.com/article/1024944169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHV3CLwWwJw
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGFmSXN6q4c
詩度高一點。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfKqOIzUV8m
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXbRaOHMFmd
～～～～分隔線～～～～169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXde4jqZSJ
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdZVr013D5Y
〈摩天之輪〉169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW8fpNuX37B
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJZA7YTMjoi
penana.com/article/1045705169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQJjAHOVMdM
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjyxrNO4rug
詩度再高一點。
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ80b7oPf3jc
～～～～分隔線～～～～
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBP7boOiYKI
〈蝴蝶酥〉169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiihmR6snpR
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJALnVPHQHD
https://www.penana.com/article/1597713169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAIZXji0sRP
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5vz5F9PWYE
詩度比前三首都高。
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfkFkTY9JPJ
～～～～分隔線～～～～
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAPXEF0gHb8
我最近在看台灣詩人蕭蕭的詩論，詩人有句話簡單卻有道理：「詩，是『換句話說』，『再換句話說』」。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9iID8xZwQq
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXkUPeh3Pom
我在筆記本上面，寫下自己的句子：「詩，是常句和變句的雙人舞。」169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAd8ohfrzas
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAdbBdSoi6f
跟你分享。
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRNG39uIml
～～～～分隔線～～～～
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNrM2vBUJK3
此外，這篇連結文章也可作參考。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2OdMvOFFCK
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr0m3hIbe1K
【認識新詩的基本元素】169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjRZ2Cxy9K8
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqpInKxvHo
blog.udn.com/shesiya/113597193169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnWJoaJs14M
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcmhv6Yn6O7
我之後應該會就我最近對新詩的思考＆自己詩作/非詩作的例子，寫一篇文章放在我的《寫詩這件事及其他》裡面。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHbFChwmnP
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNMYBRpskCe
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmgfZjd0uPT
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJeUrahQcKb
【我後來回答參賽者「希望較符合你的標準」的留言】
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGrPUhmd2Vw
這不是我的標準啦，算是台灣詩人對新詩的定義。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJmS2sSAYpb
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwMiGifs8lf
第二版「詩度」有提升，因為用了複沓/排比結構，綿延的音樂性增加了。169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqqSCHFyF94
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmFlbSIVA53
寫詩要多看詩，也不用急，我檢視自己這兩年多密集寫詩的成果，發現好多不熟的，甚至是皮球假裝成果子的，哈哈～
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSaS0oGGraA
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzWBH1XL2D
【這次全新寫的感想】
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlp8ulTu0hC
我拿自己青澀的詩果，甚至非詩的皮球作例子，無非是希望讀者能做個比較，認識一下不同詩度的詩，長什麼樣子；這裡再拿我寫的〈詠栗〉作例子：
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmixvSJblXl
〈詠栗〉
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4wDZFUjna
殼斗，第一層愛
張牙舞爪威嚇
眾鳥獸，為了
豐美的內在
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDxx1mNlcUJ
剝去愛，尚有
木訥果皮和刻苦種皮
無口而全然
環抱整個子代
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZeKBPD6Hnq
充盈在手中打開
當秋天到來
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm1Oxkwf0er
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOPiqZECSl2
如果寫成
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNWwJXuVxQF
〈詠栗〉
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8XymsljHbv
殼斗，第一層皮
長滿尖刺威嚇
眾鳥獸，為了
內在的果實
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzO7DyPJW2s
剝去殼，尚有
木質果皮和苦味種皮
沒有裂口而且完全
包覆整個子葉
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtk4VdAJFH
栗子在手中打開
當秋天到來
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcvpX2oamx
詩度就不見啦，成為一篇分行的散文，而且是說明文。
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7sLf4SOkRu
會寫詩的讀者，可將自己詩裡的詩句 (＝變句)，換成一般常用的句子 (＝常句) 玩玩看；而苦惱於抓不到詩度的讀者，反其道而行，將自己作品的句子，改動幾個詞彙，以「一般不會這樣用」的語詞 (也可改變詞性) 代替，或可抓到一點詩的感覺。
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡghfBaog6Bu
當然，現代詩的面向不僅在於詞彙，但這是一個開始。
169Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7TB9UGyEaY
祝各位被詩淋透，不，淋得半濕就好。
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