以下是我看到某參賽作品以後，所寫的留言轉正文，供大家參考。
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRVxIGYJIY
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCeZePX8dea
感謝參與～121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKXdNKvcAo4
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbq5pZ5XFoN
老實說，這篇給我的感覺不是十行詩，是散文十行。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1tHaO2VQV5
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZOmvTv4fNC
雖然文章有哲理，但是詩度很低。詩的要素，如節奏、意象、音樂、譬喻都很平淡，甚至欠奉；內容太趨近說明，解釋過多，太黏了。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1nEfyy8UFp
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWytAHOdtKd
～～～～分隔線～～～～121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hVYL8z5BS
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFftV7L6TYb
我回頭看我自己寫的詩，有些也算不上是詩，例如121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVHnkWQC5xB
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUftcQIiBfd
〈限制和自由〉121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgePkTK0U1E
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ4Z4n46o4X
penana.com/article/1024895121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwdYrcwZz84
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsUIVjRqxMy
現在看來，我覺得它不是詩 (但為記錄故，還是收進詩集)。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWqhFOP5Iw0
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFvXSryWNTl
詩度 0。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgUESKcinl
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAn3gsfTjQS
～～～～分隔線～～～～121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7mPJtqfnxS
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLaZ6lHP8r1
〈問〉121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf3F2N4Jx9D
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCihxaXvaSm
penana.com/article/1024944121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVnpO3QizfB
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfgBguFXrjZ
詩度高一點。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDs5IB4Z0j
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdMkJSlet2Q
～～～～分隔線～～～～121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqm5H0fhoCd
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPrh6V5oIJV
〈摩天之輪〉121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBSUsGE1cpB
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAhoWDgaReR
penana.com/article/1045705121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgTXorpozCu
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGDdmdy7Sz4
詩度再高一點。
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTW2FjiX3pr
～～～～分隔線～～～～
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ35tEirbmYT
〈蝴蝶酥〉121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEpfmcDk2e9
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmT3iHC9vva
https://www.penana.com/article/1597713121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMhnqg56QsD
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccMOCGElKE
詩度比前三首都高。
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA5iQh2lcNX
～～～～分隔線～～～～
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRWOhLJ9Gp
我最近在看台灣詩人蕭蕭的詩論，詩人有句話簡單卻有道理：「詩，是『換句話說』，『再換句話說』」。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLEwgH9vuQe
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ZZWmtUBYH
我在筆記本上面，寫下自己的句子：「詩，是常句和變句的雙人舞。」121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYCIdTbv5de
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhV4FcNB6M0
跟你分享。
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqxY3LidazK
～～～～分隔線～～～～
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1MvEzSpS5N
此外，這篇連結文章也可作參考。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDPR3qLjpy3
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0dWg14mCN4
【認識新詩的基本元素】121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWFtwsNyTm
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXly1pNsWAD
blog.udn.com/shesiya/113597193121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN0fKLNjaFZ
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5WQPxgxDto
我之後應該會就我最近對新詩的思考＆自己詩作/非詩作的例子，寫一篇文章放在我的《寫詩這件事及其他》裡面。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeWc7VXDyC4
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHtbCk24jol
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgAI6Kak50q
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjm5dKBDWml
【我後來回答參賽者「希望較符合你的標準」的留言】
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1x4RlvQhpC
這不是我的標準啦，算是台灣詩人對新詩的定義。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxYNw7L7Zgq
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfmgTW3lJM
第二版「詩度」有提升，因為用了複沓/排比結構，綿延的音樂性增加了。121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡImiNycXXUR
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡma04CIZl5R
寫詩要多看詩，也不用急，我檢視自己這兩年多密集寫詩的成果，發現好多不熟的，甚至是皮球假裝成果子的，哈哈～
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEPa3ze8KpV
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvAYCMLjjhX
【這次全新寫的感想】
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7RIoqYW0S3
我拿自己青澀的詩果，甚至非詩的皮球作例子，無非是希望讀者能做個比較，認識一下不同詩度的詩，長什麼樣子；這裡再拿我寫的〈詠栗〉作例子：
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQ0qkqOpl3
〈詠栗〉
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwcrUSdS0wy
殼斗，第一層愛
張牙舞爪威嚇
眾鳥獸，為了
豐美的內在
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyxX6g3QZa
剝去愛，尚有
木訥果皮和刻苦種皮
無口而全然
環抱整個子代
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaonoMCBoVj
充盈在手中打開
當秋天到來
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlHMtw2K1Zj
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwF9bQ86ahF
如果寫成
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXuKeZPTLsl
〈詠栗〉
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXcDMO7DGzb
殼斗，第一層皮
長滿尖刺威嚇
眾鳥獸，為了
內在的果實
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3c3KG7WWlh
剝去殼，尚有
木質果皮和苦味種皮
沒有裂口而且完全
包覆整個子葉
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgnKmRPV9E
栗子在手中打開
當秋天到來
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ffVXpASkT
詩度就不見啦，成為一篇分行的散文，而且是說明文。
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZppcbL1dU
會寫詩的讀者，可將自己詩裡的詩句 (＝變句)，換成一般常用的句子 (＝常句) 玩玩看；而苦惱於抓不到詩度的讀者，反其道而行，將自己作品的句子，改動幾個詞彙，以「一般不會這樣用」的語詞 (也可改變詞性) 代替，或可抓到一點詩的感覺。
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK7QEywUlbs
當然，現代詩的面向不僅在於詞彙，但這是一個開始。
121Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdLB0giefF8
祝各位被詩淋透，不，淋得半濕就好。
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