A/N: A somewhat tongue-in-cheek skit as you can probably tell from the title, but this was plenty of fun to write. Maybe I'll return to properly finish it one day. 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8yax8ndtrh
-:-973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqgFPtm8haY
THE TYPICAL GOTHIC VICTORIAN MELODRAMA, ONLY GAYER AND LESS WHITE973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAX1pdtVrg5
CHARACTERS973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqs6V6KAvkJ
CECIL - male, twenties, biracial, well-dressed973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMnZD0dQ75v
XIUYING - female, twenties, Chinese, no-nonsense; a suffragette973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGhCiCxM4rZ
--973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXySv7letJ
EXT. GARDEN BENCH, NIGHT973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh20y7PoSdB
Early twentieth century. CECIL sits, head in his hands, as XIUYING studies a handwritten letter with furrowed brows. She carefully folds it back up and turns to CECIL.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXicb4xjsez
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡncnjOBpobS
We don’t have much time.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPSgijbgoxt
CECIL
I’m surprised we have any time left at all! It only came in the post this morning. What the hell am I going to do?973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXp4keAgkN
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhkz1qVVGcp
First, you need to calm down so we can consider the situation. 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLCNvGfLIJD
CECIL973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYJ8wUF0ptp
Calm? Calm? How can you expect me to stay calm after that? My lover is blackmailing me over poetry - explicit poetry that I sent him! He expects a thousand pounds by tonight, or else I’m in for ruin and two years hard labour!973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtyeIYIrmxd
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21pZEDbdhE
I understand you’re upset - 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbgIcaH64yA
CECIL973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GpfPkM08A
I damn well am! 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9u1gXr8IGt
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBB5XOpDlQD
- but panicking will get nothing done. I am so sorry this happened, Cecil, and… I’m so sorry about Laurence.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0JHyDNng5P
CECIL, stricken anew, breaks down. 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMxmNWmwxP5
CECIL973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjgQV5Zb7c
Dear God, I trusted him. The first person I ever trusted with my love, and he betrayed me. I didn’t know he had it in him. We were all so careful. There was no possible chance of discovery. The three of us were the only ones who knew. I don’t understand why he could do this. 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3P0IYmQxu0
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM5nkbMU8l7
(slowly)973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlLOzNE5Kka
As a matter of fact, I highly doubt it was him at all.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz4auUewaDm
CECIL freezes and looks up at her. 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9fLG0Opup5
CECIL973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZXxM8Yk9ig
What?973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlXQdntwauu
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAW7PsTcCsS
I cannot in good conscience believe that Laurence is behind this.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgxzeHRW7Ej
CECIL973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvz1dzvaT3I
Xiuying, what on earth are you talking about? This is Laurence’s handwriting. This is the very ink and paper he uses to write his plays! (He gets angry.) Do you think I haven’t considered the possibility that the love of my life couldn’t be blackmailing me like this? This is undeniably him!973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNFMeM8x1wr
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIupOJBHOb6
Yes, but if you had taken the time to read over this thoroughly, you would notice that his handwriting is wobbly.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQUy6rayhvM
CECIL973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhqcLdQ5aHy
It’s always wobbly. Messy handwriting is the staple of any artist.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjMCubbGy56
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPXggA3yh48
Messier than usual, I mean. You two may be lovers, but I’m the one who’s known him since grammar school. He only ever writes like this when he’s upset or under exceptional stress.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7VbHOKLFFY
CECIL973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWtksWH1IiP
Well, maybe he was nervous, pulling the rug out from under someone who trusted him. 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqHM4raEMqG
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡptXN7V1VHX
That may be the case, but look at this.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXmbIC092j
She points at several dark brown and rust-coloured stains at the edges of the paper. There are ink blotches everywhere, but these particular spots, upon close inspection, are distinctive. 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYPpCNJBvSZ
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7aMLjc2ch1
If I’m not mistaken, that is blood.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk8wEV0x3Ht
CECIL973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIwdP3MiS3M
Blood? (A pause as horrified realization creeps in.) Oh, dear God. Laurence.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJfB66W1KpI
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZzhMC70DZ
(grimly)973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjocm74J0IK
Exactly. There’s something deeper here, far worse than what’s on the surface. 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzgmkrWACBz
CECIL973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhsi484rpub
But - but if someone is forcing Laurence to write this, then how - how can we get him back? I don’t own a thousand pounds. I couldn’t possibly pay this person off.973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGuPzBs7n7N
CECIL is shocked to turn and see XIUYING smiling faintly. 973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5HeYUPOBYm
XIUYING973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WIN03WR8B
Who said anything about paying them off?973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmtCi5L0YB
--973Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZYEKQJP7sR
