Okay, here's some background knowledge. I post dad jokes daily (well, almost daily), and I finally can put them to good use. I hope it's okay that I just lumped basically all my jokes into one entry.
Why did the ghost use the elevator?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQZo2foo1br
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To lift his spirits.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccTEpbm5n1
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What do you call a French guy being mauled by a lion?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6XHKpizZzy
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Claude.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGjCdb6wOgu
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Why did the number of parking tickets spike when Persephone was carried off to the Underworld?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡel7zau0oVz
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Demeter wasn't working.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNyMW64OxdO
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Yesterday I was washing my car with my son.
He said, "Dad, can't you just use a sponge?"537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs95d5Hl3Ig
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Genie: What is your final wish?
Kid: I wish I were you.
Genie: Weurd, but alrught.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuJrjfcSfO7
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What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3ZQ6hdtZE
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"Bison."537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2lOsJaq56J
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Bread is like the sun.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4l6c9pdTJf
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It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEn2oNcXTK
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A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.
"You can't cut me down," the tree complains. "I'm a talking tree!"
The man responds, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsbpFClt4fx
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What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 miles per hour?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKgEtmfgYz
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Its butt.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe24jbUnTS8
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Two windmills are standing on a wind farm.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡds4A6ePI2z
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How do you get a farm girl to marry you?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPJUncnbUKe
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First, a tractor.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5dIo98sOCu
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Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. But if you remove it, you get...537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOVU7n3g6ao
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Gravy.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUOMpANPTLU
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Medusa caught the eye of a street musician.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdqb9IIcfkh
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Now he's a rockstar.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdp8KTrBqRM
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A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a deep coma and woke up after almost 6 months. She asked the doctor about her baby.
The doctor said, "You had twins, a girl, and a boy. They're both fine. Your brother named them for you."
The woman said, "No! My brother is an idiot! What did he name the girl?"
The doctor replied, "Denise."
The woman said, "Oh, that's pretty. What about the boy?"
The doctor let out a deep sigh, and said, "Denephew."537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk5rPI3dC3R
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Do trees poop?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrdSQ9botGw
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Of course they do. How else would we get #2 pencils?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSiHB8I1hXu
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What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡagZP5Coqrg
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A "do-you-think-he-saurus."537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2pWMax4rQA
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Have you heard about the teacher who was cross-eyed?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv3LMf7Jkyw
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She couldn't control her pupils.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ78gPmui39H
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What do peppers do when they're angry?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQdLmIjORJj
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They get jalapeño face.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFL3cvMu0UY
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Today someone told me I am average.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVoIDDiugQW
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I told them that's just mean.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBnc51CMQl7
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What do you call a pencil with two erasers?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqIf6HVX5AH
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Pointless.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSjweB625Dm
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Dude 1: "Hey bro?"
Dude 2: "Yeah bro?"
Dude 1: "Can you hand me that pamphlet?"
Dude 2: "Brochure."537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBFcFQkobdO
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Did you hear about the racing snail who got rid of his shell?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj5qq45kwfZ
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He thought it would make him faster, but it just made him sluggish.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG71OGsKZnL
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Have you ever tried to catch fog?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxFEtRkQI0B
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I tried yesterday but I mist.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcvaQglQVA4
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Why can't you ever run through a campsite?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQGC5mxC0j
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You can only ran—it's always past tents.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbDoeKN0B8
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What country's capital is growing the fastest?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT3eKVlPhXJ
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Ireland. Every day it's Dublin.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhDlVkHvMYt
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What has four wheels and flies?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6yPi5HopC
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A garbage truck.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZuTlhzMm4O
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I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A woman asked me to check her balance...537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBe7iXgFZhP
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...so I pushed her over.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYTFfLV1xE3
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd1Y3Mus9Ei
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If they flew over a bay, they would be bagels.537Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfFG3YQmogt
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Uh, yeah. That's all I got.
ns216.73.216.144da2
