Okay, here's some background knowledge. I post dad jokes daily (well, almost daily), and I finally can put them to good use. I hope it's okay that I just lumped basically all my jokes into one entry.
Why did the ghost use the elevator?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQMhH6MF2AL
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To lift his spirits.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA7XuwFGuQZ
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What do you call a French guy being mauled by a lion?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8njzuDJC04
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQtEdVBAdB
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Claude.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ73Sm72tXgf
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Why did the number of parking tickets spike when Persephone was carried off to the Underworld?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGjdzZJWqL
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3vXfcV6tZ6
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMqcakkidhH
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Demeter wasn't working.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWQvKS4efUd
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Yesterday I was washing my car with my son.
He said, "Dad, can't you just use a sponge?"474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDrmfd7Mftp
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Genie: What is your final wish?
Kid: I wish I were you.
Genie: Weurd, but alrught.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRBxcfvvgi
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What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuExsFlrPDu
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgz3AkvzfcN
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuFn8Fh8kJM
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"Bison."474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJZ4lyWFOhG
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Bread is like the sun.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QMVwR6MKj
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvrafXhDA8
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡirLecpx7iU
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It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE75b2zWNHH
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A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.
"You can't cut me down," the tree complains. "I'm a talking tree!"
The man responds, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtkzyfA5Cy
---474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFIpBAxEzc
What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 miles per hour?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh43ZDLhiaU
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP25jXyB507
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfcAlwyiAxK
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Its butt.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWVhb88E914
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Two windmills are standing on a wind farm.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgn9ZCXfWN
---474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQBXu24Utd
How do you get a farm girl to marry you?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZvJKa3Jlti
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpbTVZV95GZ
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqg8WZFCVg
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First, a tractor.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeOV0GtCcIE
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Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. But if you remove it, you get...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTn5FMPgRaJ
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC3WdFyXkyE
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Gravy.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡioUB48ye26
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Medusa caught the eye of a street musician.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMoW2lZYKuE
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...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYKzBnl6CaC
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Now he's a rockstar.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxolvD8WRNt
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A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a deep coma and woke up after almost 6 months. She asked the doctor about her baby.
The doctor said, "You had twins, a girl, and a boy. They're both fine. Your brother named them for you."
The woman said, "No! My brother is an idiot! What did he name the girl?"
The doctor replied, "Denise."
The woman said, "Oh, that's pretty. What about the boy?"
The doctor let out a deep sigh, and said, "Denephew."474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Q6LR6pEJT
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Do trees poop?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGPvSOZNco
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAfuSMPWGxo
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GwlXwGlhG
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Of course they do. How else would we get #2 pencils?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0l1mxiVQkO
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What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4vuu7Y8GUu
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmfXlSqa8Gt
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdTLapTKrio
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A "do-you-think-he-saurus."474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3kxeXSJ2SO
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Have you heard about the teacher who was cross-eyed?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgTaVfFpX6f
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhpXdC8DyuF
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlckte4eMaR
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She couldn't control her pupils.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8s2eC0dWss
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What do peppers do when they're angry?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5jJnGtmY2m
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdDagLLOgiz
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbFaM8D8phT
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡORFC9R33QC
They get jalapeño face.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkA5gEQI67E
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Today someone told me I am average.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS54Za535E2
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6yJ9gtfSH
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ck7ztMVO1
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I told them that's just mean.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRwBZ763dXu
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What do you call a pencil with two erasers?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3thc2SdygN
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKMAK5vD5z
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKhkreBOjYU
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Pointless.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLexfhquUwE
---474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡawkYVNtJTF
Dude 1: "Hey bro?"
Dude 2: "Yeah bro?"
Dude 1: "Can you hand me that pamphlet?"
Dude 2: "Brochure."474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy7RXRow2gr
---474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0xtWecmEpD
Did you hear about the racing snail who got rid of his shell?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSpP35mMwj0
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVp77lryy2T
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBSIkgSO7ep
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He thought it would make him faster, but it just made him sluggish.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMz5SOovep3
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Have you ever tried to catch fog?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcMw6CVDb6C
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVeOykPyMOd
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzInWRgs4Gv
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I tried yesterday but I mist.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuvrtaPA3wS
---474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4JG27hGOOq
Why can't you ever run through a campsite?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrgNmI7NNm0
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwI5EiPorm3
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhTTWJuqfSW
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You can only ran—it's always past tents.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡukQHrAspzk
---474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQYumwdur2
What country's capital is growing the fastest?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJ1NyjRpeO
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2uKgrmhd1
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgqVOkgTeMp
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ZIoP6yoB0
Ireland. Every day it's Dublin.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMZgqPRTcz
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What has four wheels and flies?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMLEaUtv21
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbzu9MkfePN
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIH8ima6ShD
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A garbage truck.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKmGochtVIh
---474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX9NFxhF46n
I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A woman asked me to check her balance...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKPbftdRgdP
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4NpSOk2DhN
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX4EySgPJve
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...so I pushed her over.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡstMA6T6Bdg
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUz5FRyK1CH
474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8R9vNyPYpa
...474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2X5OIHPQuw
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If they flew over a bay, they would be bagels.474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPR4wqT3Pc
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474Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCdEkpFf4Ni
Uh, yeah. That's all I got.
ns18.217.95.146da2
