Okay, here's some background knowledge. I post dad jokes daily (well, almost daily), and I finally can put them to good use. I hope it's okay that I just lumped basically all my jokes into one entry.
Why did the ghost use the elevator?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH4ykpOF1eA
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCSbxsnCuAC
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To lift his spirits.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiP5cfAjdYR
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What do you call a French guy being mauled by a lion?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4nFKG5BmP6
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNlRFWV2uL
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Claude.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhdyZBMxizS
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Why did the number of parking tickets spike when Persephone was carried off to the Underworld?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi2dle6JiKz
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUD17jiKvPo
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTA2dgdXFt
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Demeter wasn't working.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsBbq9uzbfn
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Yesterday I was washing my car with my son.
He said, "Dad, can't you just use a sponge?"498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FTp3Z1TNZ
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Genie: What is your final wish?
Kid: I wish I were you.
Genie: Weurd, but alrught.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk4ZsbCeOMx
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What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡanHorya9mK
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlurvW3uVV1
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡehlH0pumCu
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQVucfFCD7v
"Bison."498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lkUe4JgYu
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Bread is like the sun.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLlmgcinT6x
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVENX5SuHpp
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It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmuZKchhBgf
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A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.
"You can't cut me down," the tree complains. "I'm a talking tree!"
The man responds, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5ctcdlnWk
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What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 miles per hour?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGjkbI2VGQh
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuveNgKCXnQ
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1G8GN5MwDw
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Its butt.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8O2OMuA0Dq
---498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6h7mSM7oAt
Two windmills are standing on a wind farm.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJzhH5bAYD0
---498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GBhjDZZcg
How do you get a farm girl to marry you?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6veSeE5qz
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67nUPWvDDt
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ619x6Kk6n7
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First, a tractor.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1G8Yex4ZOa
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Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. But if you remove it, you get...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPclF0u62dw
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0SJKq5lM1V
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Gravy.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMBKMx37Xt2
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Medusa caught the eye of a street musician.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡreaQDEdI8G
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa7CQQeurLx
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX7lxc659h9
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Now he's a rockstar.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMvbshnjivA
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A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a deep coma and woke up after almost 6 months. She asked the doctor about her baby.
The doctor said, "You had twins, a girl, and a boy. They're both fine. Your brother named them for you."
The woman said, "No! My brother is an idiot! What did he name the girl?"
The doctor replied, "Denise."
The woman said, "Oh, that's pretty. What about the boy?"
The doctor let out a deep sigh, and said, "Denephew."498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFS3eF4F0hH
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Do trees poop?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlPUOsokcmD
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...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuhAx7IeXbq
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Of course they do. How else would we get #2 pencils?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vOOtpxVz3
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What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0wOv5zY7yI
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLG4VAuWzTj
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhLDDYL0Yht
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK25GCv5mv3
A "do-you-think-he-saurus."498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjWV73gfKCg
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Have you heard about the teacher who was cross-eyed?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcsnn6sqgjw
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp3c7JH7PF7
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9LQnaQyQV7
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0yjyhXT1eb
She couldn't control her pupils.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXwzIC1SuQ3
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What do peppers do when they're angry?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vPfGSr9x5
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WhP6Y3y0g
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYvNsKJkNSB
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They get jalapeño face.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkJsYVZ8dkA
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Today someone told me I am average.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhC77j6TbuL
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNhWCgrkc0a
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKKE9cv2YRs
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I told them that's just mean.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCnpDZttfZf
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What do you call a pencil with two erasers?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNt8YQQvH0
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDEhrMiJv5t
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0YIaIaktEN
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡms6nkdQ2SM
Pointless.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf6Bv30pbqY
---498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszYkxY1GZV
Dude 1: "Hey bro?"
Dude 2: "Yeah bro?"
Dude 1: "Can you hand me that pamphlet?"
Dude 2: "Brochure."498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiaHQUIN9W5
---498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQuarXsAROL
Did you hear about the racing snail who got rid of his shell?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡReEJsx8baD
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡivEwEj1zL6
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyJdsR1CVzj
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgem5rhH6XN
He thought it would make him faster, but it just made him sluggish.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRFSK8JOyu
---498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPTf5QykuVY
Have you ever tried to catch fog?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2z8g0a7uTj
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7OVKJBy5GS
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0AmFWvFow7
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp1D80IdQvY
I tried yesterday but I mist.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2oL6vHS84
---498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlPFBET75BA
Why can't you ever run through a campsite?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtsIiXKLl1Y
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ87Mb8ouvZh
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5tIqpX7x3b
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJuS5gnw0he
You can only ran—it's always past tents.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAMfAFpUR8J
---498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDzUbuwWuCB
What country's capital is growing the fastest?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqcxADBJLYM
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMbz4g8hmq3
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqu9k48Y0M
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdnhcHM8d2
Ireland. Every day it's Dublin.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ42IHpedlWo
---498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DJjJ1OQ2M
What has four wheels and flies?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeaqLTpDdGa
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtMxAMPBIl2
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpZio9bWwNH
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYYkb50S2w3
A garbage truck.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FVOKClRo9
---498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqE3RzjoEwJ
I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A woman asked me to check her balance...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7sNR2Me55
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuTaarNWKrG
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqaduSC37h
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Mf6sEDOcV
...so I pushed her over.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTQhjDILIPy
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0bP55vS7dj
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtr0H4fMtAm
...498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3D80r8Qcly
498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw3ZbOxnxj5
If they flew over a bay, they would be bagels.498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcMc0gpeN38
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498Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwJMnAxLXR
Uh, yeah. That's all I got.
ns3.22.51.104da2
