Okay, here's some background knowledge. I post dad jokes daily (well, almost daily), and I finally can put them to good use. I hope it's okay that I just lumped basically all my jokes into one entry.
Why did the ghost use the elevator?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTKjEbDHkm
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...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvZ3UV0nvRJ
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To lift his spirits.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcJv3RO6VJC
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What do you call a French guy being mauled by a lion?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2MH4Cf0nIg
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2VzYiQf2C
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg5gnjCUpJv
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Claude.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTuzHIDscf4
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Why did the number of parking tickets spike when Persephone was carried off to the Underworld?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4ZS9wBnhY
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Jt2Gu7es5
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh8Lcxqcw4A
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Demeter wasn't working.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFH2Cx0oSO8
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2tfFAEvPol
Yesterday I was washing my car with my son.
He said, "Dad, can't you just use a sponge?"430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1U2JnxuQW
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJR1IwmV9ta
Genie: What is your final wish?
Kid: I wish I were you.
Genie: Weurd, but alrught.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcrMHno9gAP
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What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuCVYBQ08OZ
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt4NNTjMHSh
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5pFN6sroR0
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"Bison."430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP4WTGVCzrW
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Bread is like the sun.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlaeupMKQfv
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfw046ztoDd
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLM5jFYOvT
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It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNxXYXiROSf
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8v4Geyg7Ae
A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.
"You can't cut me down," the tree complains. "I'm a talking tree!"
The man responds, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8LPci4DRNS
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxJebJ2Usi
What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 miles per hour?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMcTox8uUeQ
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBF3WBjXoJx
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqqxr1FGLvl
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Its butt.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBu9PUnfBvJ
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2KdhrQF0iZ
Two windmills are standing on a wind farm.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTFZX1hXpqX
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPQ22SmhMxP
How do you get a farm girl to marry you?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6lZSMx1Q7H
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3oA4Lydvw
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSYqxHemYBO
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First, a tractor.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6LpGfoOTe7
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Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. But if you remove it, you get...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxScUpyW6n0
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Gravy.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGM9ayNnrcV
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Medusa caught the eye of a street musician.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZag2B36VWy
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...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTarTPJuznG
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Now he's a rockstar.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjNJMpDPy6b
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Z9VQf5Trw
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a deep coma and woke up after almost 6 months. She asked the doctor about her baby.
The doctor said, "You had twins, a girl, and a boy. They're both fine. Your brother named them for you."
The woman said, "No! My brother is an idiot! What did he name the girl?"
The doctor replied, "Denise."
The woman said, "Oh, that's pretty. What about the boy?"
The doctor let out a deep sigh, and said, "Denephew."430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXGUrh6vOJ
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhPOnUJyM4L
Do trees poop?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxMLlL8fTZe
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...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBWpEuu1yfM
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Of course they do. How else would we get #2 pencils?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFttjS4vxTX
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIOl4iBvI3z
What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKdYDAFBo7f
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7CNGpLvcCU
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOhWnvkqDIG
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRdBjkBITCJ
A "do-you-think-he-saurus."430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUlYUVcQ5K
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIFzSUI1ZU4
Have you heard about the teacher who was cross-eyed?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2Z5QcHArM
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...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLvW703yDWt
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She couldn't control her pupils.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeUwV9dQou6
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjusBjfNlnW
What do peppers do when they're angry?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHyx3NBKRMq
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...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVq4JKSLnFb
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They get jalapeño face.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWrtgxuaClE
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1266EQ6mnc
Today someone told me I am average.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkHPN4uUTGR
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9dlOE1gv9Z
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxqUKI0Pum
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I told them that's just mean.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLQ8iav6gv
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVw4HMiT5Y6
What do you call a pencil with two erasers?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrafCQnHLiD
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUVe784LFaX
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh0o4QbJRYD
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Pointless.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRIjY06W7N
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4Fnntxp9d
Dude 1: "Hey bro?"
Dude 2: "Yeah bro?"
Dude 1: "Can you hand me that pamphlet?"
Dude 2: "Brochure."430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU7reK9AN4F
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3alj1KcGLF
Did you hear about the racing snail who got rid of his shell?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg29r2q8Bp9
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC6kXYgVhrb
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDKOgdDpb6Q
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPl7rsSXY8
He thought it would make him faster, but it just made him sluggish.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXGU2JC3YXw
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYY49iYaJfv
Have you ever tried to catch fog?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuEkdogsdPi
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD8gVqMBYxU
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Nrg9KQm0y
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I tried yesterday but I mist.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEjZTEoFcgR
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSWbJsCzkrr
Why can't you ever run through a campsite?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAxp1oYpp7A
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ26AmdQ7kmO
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfcevYR1pOG
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You can only ran—it's always past tents.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHO0Njsqq9f
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq67cOxz4LV
What country's capital is growing the fastest?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkOdSEt2C62
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJKNUmEpep
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10QV0JHdPs
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFoFH2F1JUQ
Ireland. Every day it's Dublin.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxEpSSQSkG8
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxMykzRzCwf
What has four wheels and flies?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8PGuN1fAO1
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMMrq7QbcgW
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlekxs8xXPT
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfrL06j06Ax
A garbage truck.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRaIUZeBBXy
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2qA4FISoHE
I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A woman asked me to check her balance...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQwoK2ZbDU
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtTXBJS2juv
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBzsnk5S3s
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl0Tzbwp06A
...so I pushed her over.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWRl3Teia8
---430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhnMUicM2Ro
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKl3zqoH9yV
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpMxCW4e0rX
...430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTKfvrdeKTY
430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvp2lkA4ZBF
If they flew over a bay, they would be bagels.430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxCz3pTZY59
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430Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYDbaalCYs5
Uh, yeah. That's all I got.
ns3.16.159.162da2
