It was a VERY strong wind that day, and I absolutely swear to god that none of it was my fault. Seriously, guys. It was the WIND that knocked my umbrella into that dork's face. And his coffee fell too, rolling away. I explicitly articulated my most SINCEREST apologies and how I was just as much publicly humiliated as him.
"What is wrong with you-- I'm Gabe by the way--," he took my gloved hand to shake before returning to his nuclear meltdown. "--And what is wrong with you, coming out of nowhere, a ninja slash cat monkey assaulting my vulnerability, battering me to a pulp, leaving me struggling within in an inch of my life. I have asthma, you brute. Precious people like me die from wheezing. How dare you."
"I am MIRANDA," I shrug at Gabe. "Guess I am TOO MUCH of a woman for you."1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZ9IzakUrF
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With the last word, I STRUT away. A minute later, it grew apparent he won't let that happen. He ran to my side, stammering and BLUBBERING like a fool.1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAde8DYk3FT
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"Now, just wait a gosh-darned second here!" Gabe raised a finger. I kept a straight face when inside I just wanted to LOL. "You still owe me coffee-- and for mangling my face-- who knows if I ever see you again."1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡylOiXp429k
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"I did not MANGLE your face! The wind did! Your face is not mangled, your face is perfectly FINE!" I huffed, realizing we stood outside the cafe. "I am being blackmailed and entrapped. I am not okay with it!"1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfGtihoAUvC
1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDaO70E2Sxj
The clouds roared back, and rain shattered. I fought with the umbrella.1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBqueBreGl9
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"So it's a date!" Gabe shouted over the hysteria. 1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJueReUnfR4
1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHNIrCNC8gz
"NO. GOODBYE FOREVER." I stormed off into the storm, wrestling with the umbrella and the wind. It took until the stoplight when Gabe ran up at the moment the wind grew VERY strong again. I swear to god, it was NOT ME the first time and it was STILL not me the second time. SMACK.1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnzveopFZ4V
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The umbrella slapped Gabe ... again. I SHRIEKED in horror.1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQCXSFqUxIe
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"What is wrong with you-- ," Gabe said as the pedestrian sign lit up and chased me across the splashing street. "-- I think I'm bleeding! Am I bleeding? My poor mangled face. You may rob me of my coffee and my dignity but you can't get rid of me that easy, infernal murderess. A menace to society, I say! We are all in danger!"
"Then stay FAR away from me!" 1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6AXV1eacs
1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQeJhkDp5V3
Gabe took my gloved hand, and at that moment our hair rose. White lightning struck -- shocking us both. We keeled over, tased and jolted in waves until it was over. We glanced at each other with fresh and cooked eyes. Smoke steamed from our bodies. Boots were knocked from our feet. We marveled that we were electrocuted and somehow miraculously survived. I nodded, "Okay... Coffee sounds good right now..."1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdydBfjXJa
1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYYlihBbkx3
"So it's a date, Miranda," Gabe said, pleased. "That is spectacular."1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRqZaji4vN
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"It is NOT a date," I insisted. "This is strictly normal and boring. People get hit by lightning all the time, Gabe."1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyn40c9bvtf
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"And you're buying!" He pointed an accusing finger.1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiuLd8t9dZQ
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"No, if anything it is YOU who are buying," I bickered. 1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsSgu1aGtCw
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"If I'm buying, ergo it's a date."1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6HwAdB7nWn
1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUsIxr30Fr3
"NOPE. WRONG. Regardless of someone buying, it is NOT--"1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMEGT1Fb47
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We got struck by white lightning twice and wound up in the hospital, in the same room, with a curtain drawn between us. We spent hours staring at the ceiling arguing whose fault it was and how awful the coffee were here.1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeu2BaPvPLe
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Then his voice stopped. I looked at the curtain, hearing a droning flatline. I tore the curtain back. He was off the machine, leaning in for a kiss.1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvd9YGvefaN
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"Kiss me?" 1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT9DTVuSG0t
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It was so OBVIOUS he was going to be my husband.1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaF2dMfwDMJ
So OBVIOUS he was going to be the father of my child.1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjgWmD57IGg
Gabe. That sweet dork. How can I not love him? 1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjZ6GX61Hw
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"No, you kiss me," I said. His eyes closed, as if to melt.
In our hospital gowns, we locked lips. And the rest?1153Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqT9mJ1L6z0
The rest was, as they say, a WEIRD love story.
