「我是個意外不該出生」
我從夢境中醒來,595Please respect copyright.PENANA42iK3cpnCj
595Please respect copyright.PENANAsXt4zwxHxV
事隔多年我還是會被那些回憶驚醒,595Please respect copyright.PENANAbyj3P5aGed
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那是父親童年時光常常告訴我的,595Please respect copyright.PENANA37ftwJNKlY
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幼小我的父母就離異,595Please respect copyright.PENANASFq8m6vyYI
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母親是內地人離婚後就回國了,595Please respect copyright.PENANAKW6fd6Qd1d
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對母親的記憶還是有,595Please respect copyright.PENANAuJH6iZUAqZ
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記得她很常酗酒,595Please respect copyright.PENANAySiGW1wgxx
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後來的日子,595Please respect copyright.PENANAt36iBR4jeS
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我總是在房間聆聽他們的爭吵。
父親獨自承擔起照顧我的生活,595Please respect copyright.PENANAzUt4N13UXV
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忙於工作的他,595Please respect copyright.PENANAVE2sqU0JW1
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常常讓我睡在幼兒園,595Please respect copyright.PENANAl73lf7ZpdL
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到了上課時間再直接上課,595Please respect copyright.PENANAw11ob6BvXc
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什麼?為什麼能睡在那裡,595Please respect copyright.PENANAj6k0oiYdw4
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因為姑姑是那裡的英文導師,595Please respect copyright.PENANA6vaJIDHZEN
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所以我總能寄宿在那裡,595Please respect copyright.PENANATgjhZbmHvd
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剛開始還會看著監視器期盼,595Please respect copyright.PENANAfE9uS6FeF9
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漸漸的知道自己並不會被接走。
開始在小學上課,595Please respect copyright.PENANAT1ou69oiWB
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父親工作的地方不一定,595Please respect copyright.PENANAI6YCYC5I9u
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輾轉的換了三所小學,595Please respect copyright.PENANA8cIpovD5e0
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以至於我跟同學之間的關係並沒有那麼好。
父親性格上也開始逐漸扭曲,595Please respect copyright.PENANANx76eOGfLV
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他開始會喜怒無常,595Please respect copyright.PENANADcLNVo0YRK
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沒來由的找我發脾氣,595Please respect copyright.PENANAVWCfYrXDUY
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下一秒又對我十分和善。
我很好奇……家人還有被關愛的感覺,595Please respect copyright.PENANAzFfqY4oI6f
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很小我就與異性交往,595Please respect copyright.PENANAkneZcHpIfi
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試圖尋找一些慰藉。
父親,是一名水電工,595Please respect copyright.PENANAob5ieEafFR
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家裡總是擺滿各式各樣的工作,595Please respect copyright.PENANApL6sxmNwOB
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偶爾我也會陪同他工作,595Please respect copyright.PENANArKFBS8NiQP
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我會睡在工地,595Please respect copyright.PENANAJUdM2BXrlQ
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用紙箱跟外套搭建自己的窩,595Please respect copyright.PENANA4VzzQXN0ZE
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父親在工作上十分認真敬業,595Please respect copyright.PENANAMKTqxi8Ely
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委託人總是非常信任他。
國小三年級,595Please respect copyright.PENANAkCjXXr0S3g
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他開始會講貶低的話語,595Please respect copyright.PENANASx6mj4w7cb
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那些原本用來工作的用具,595Please respect copyright.PENANAm1V4vDaAVv
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偶爾會成為威脅我的道具,595Please respect copyright.PENANAO7OuMXRogu
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他會拿著水管說:「你信不信我會打你」595Please respect copyright.PENANAN4k4IES4GT
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有次,他不蠻玩沉浸電腦跟網友聊天的我,595Please respect copyright.PENANAobiDZOQrOi
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他直接逼迫我隔天不准上課,595Please respect copyright.PENANAIHYZE6P3rX
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要我轉告給老師,595Please respect copyright.PENANAeHCawayLhh
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電話裡他說:「老師吼?有種你就報警」595Please respect copyright.PENANA7LujLQOgBC
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老師報了警,結果不小心報錯地址闖錯的門。
之後,我偶爾會逃家,595Please respect copyright.PENANARByEU6MV2U
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沒過多久被安排進了補習班,595Please respect copyright.PENANAgs4VVArThj
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那樣的對待仍然持續,而我染上了自傷的習慣。
這樣的日子長達了三年的光陰。
我從回憶中反應過來,595Please respect copyright.PENANAEqzok3FBXq
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細細去回想每個片段,595Please respect copyright.PENANAndVz2ZnYR9
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父親,很不容易的照顧了我的起居,595Please respect copyright.PENANAI4ZeQOXJ8J
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仔細想想一個照顧小女孩,595Please respect copyright.PENANApTAGpxXTzE
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對他一個大男孩很不容易,595Please respect copyright.PENANAnrs73b0jEK
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所以他很常說:「我是個意外不該出生」595Please respect copyright.PENANAME5F5ccsKl
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卻不知不覺間深深烙印在我腦海。
或許,我本不應該誕生吧。
整理了一下情緒,595Please respect copyright.PENANAqIeRBWfTDs
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走進廁所打理了一下自己狼狽的摸樣,595Please respect copyright.PENANABOAeA9QgBm
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我打開冰箱,拿出冰牛奶,595Please respect copyright.PENANA8MWdACFQ1N
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打算為自己做份牛奶麥片當早餐,595Please respect copyright.PENANAMmj1OE8yCc
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是父親最常為我做的簡易餐點,595Please respect copyright.PENANAGc1cnacDDF
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還是有很多屬於他的回憶,595Please respect copyright.PENANAcZp3hfNRwg
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我喃喃自語到:「好想失憶啊~」595Please respect copyright.PENANAd3XbIAigCK
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正準備吃下第一口時,595Please respect copyright.PENANAPwaJIFrD8y
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手機螢幕上顯示著今日的新聞,595Please respect copyright.PENANAblqIp39QOZ
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《少女淚訴遭狼父性騷擾》
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頓時,回憶到了我國二那年。595Please respect copyright.PENANAd9bi0ZERpG