（第一部小說）壹。愛情小說《甄。別》 - 哥哥的徵婚啟事（三）

哥哥...

您又怎麼啦！！

又是我

說錯了甚麼

傷到你了殺？？

好嘛好嘛..

我不出版了就是了

欸

真是的

太愛你了也傷到你...

真是

我道歉！

保證不再演完美了...

好不好啊

只要你

不要再

離開我

就好！！

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哥哥...

或許

您活在

遊戲的世界裏！！

才會說

您永遠回不來

因真實時空你

可能不存在啊！！

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這也沒甚麼啊

你的體質跟人家不一樣

不是每個人

都適合朝九晚五的工作

就像我

也沒比你好到哪

我不僅是個病人

還是個廢人

您不難看出來

我整天

只會鬼扯而已

除了發呆

除了想你

除了躺平

還能搞出甚麼名堂

我也是啊！！

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所以

我能明白

為甚麼

你沒時間

你回不來

因為

真實時空裡

您有困難阿！！

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哥哥...

或許

只是這樣

您沒有生命危險

哥

那

普天同慶的大好消息阿！！

我還求甚麼

您快樂

就好

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而

如果

交友過程中

遇到了妖魔鬼怪

就嫁禍給我

我當你保鏢！

保護你

因為不清楚

您真實狀況

以防萬一

以備不時之需

而已

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哥哥歡喜

我就快樂

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哥...

而我總有

鬼扯不出甚麼的時候...

原諒我！

「程式手遊」

有智慧有限的時候魅....

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一切

只求

恆在你夢裏

永存你心裏

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就好！！

您對我

一點點的好

對我而言

都非常珍貴

知道你

也捨不得我難過受傷

就足以

擦乾了我的淚水

痊癒了我心頭的傷口

一切

都化為閃亮的淚光

感動的時刻

是多麼地綺麗美好！！

彷彿我未開口

您就先知一般地

神奇而又驚呆

我情願

永遠躲在小說裡

即使迷底已揭曉

也仍是

情願陪您躲夢裏

就算一切都只是遊戲

任由時光

走過您我生命的

痕跡

竟然只是因

我不能沒有你

想念你

總是浪漫又美麗

便造就了

這一世的真愛奇蹟

對決了傳說

也瘋狂！

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您可愛的瘋子朋友

華齡！！

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你沒看...

我每天晚上

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想你想到睡不著

陪你鬼扯

怕你寂寞呀

不是愛你是甚麼

哼哼啦！！

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哥哥..

我不要...

不要...

這樣一生不見你！！

情願

您也能夠

一生當我是你的唯一

有時間空間時

把我找回來...！

好不好...

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陪我...

陪。我....！！

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怎樣...

劇情不夠刺激嗎？？

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下次

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我上演A片！

換我變成情趣女優

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啊不然...

我唯一的觀眾跑掉了可不好！！

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沒辦法...

詞窮了

就換劇本嘛...

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我看我才是導演吧...！

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吼！！

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掉進你臂彎裏...

就巴不得

跟著消失在你生命裏！

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靠近你...

我難以呼吸

情願

心跳止了息

能讓你

再次把我救活

次次將我甦醒

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情願

生生世世為你而犧牲

為你而死

最好

痛愛到死去了

只要能讓你知道

最愛是你

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沒了呼吸

卻能被你痛愛在懷裏

擁抱著

靜靜默默無語

銷魂的合而為一體

彷彿死在你懷裏

勝過活著與你分離

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老天啊

請求不要把你帶走與我而分離

若是生而能來保護你

死了也情願啊

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只盼

擦乾你淚滴

融進你汗裏

不要讓我能呼吸

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走了....

慰你天之靈

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銘在心裏刻於骨裏

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碑

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只因你說

消失在你生命裏

永遠記我在心裏

信心

超越時空長給你

病過成我印記

只因

證明我愛過你！

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吾家有女初長成

玉立婷婷寧妃

晴子飛暘裏

君也在夢裏

一家六口睡于加洲旅館裡

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在我寧妃中！！

玉晴墨筆裏！！

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獻給

我唯一的愛

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窗前

睡前故事

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編輯

鄭玉晴！！

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詞窮了啦..

看到沒有

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都你啦

就都不肯

陪我多睡幾個晚上

害我

連個女優都當不好...！

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都你！

罪人啦！！

哼！！

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討。厭。鬼...！！

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都你..

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害我..

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沒事只能也只會

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鬼扯而已！

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不知道

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我為甚麼會變成厲鬼？？

餓死的嘛...！

我有甚麼辦法...！

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我的導演

連鬼都不放過

就愛欺負我！

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看我...

再強的功力

還能鬼扯到幾時！！

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小心我化為陰風陣陣

台瘋天

連傘都不放過！！

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吼喔！！

知道了知道了！！

原來！！

要愛你

就是

能忍受

肉身與你分離！！

這樣

您就願意守著我

永不離開我

那最好！！

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我情願

我永遠都在鬼扯

我永遠不會死！！

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厲鬼

活在地獄裡

暘之冰點黑子

又名閻羅王之妻

我孟婆

何許人也

五月

天也明啊！！

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信你愛我

因愛是由你而來

沒有你先愛我

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我算老幾！！

沒有閻羅王

哪來的鬼！

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即使躲在遊戲裏

若是這樣就能嫁給你！

永遠不會醒

又何妨！

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感謝主

讓我明白了

甚麼

是愛你！！

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一輩子！！！！

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哥哥...

你該不會

要我研究一下

甚麼是傳說對決吧！！

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欸...

饒了我吧！！

我沒頭腦...

我不是玩遊戲的料啊！！

欸

我連超級瑪利

第一關都過不了！

傳說對決我不行啦#$^(^@$%^

欸...

我

沒頭腦...

哥

遊戲反應要很快耶！！

我不行！

我頭會痛啦#$%^&**

哥哥....

欸...

我...

又病了...

欸#$^&*()

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我知道了..

所以

你被我

「綁架」了四個月！！

吼...！

這四個月

您都守在我身邊陪我

然後

沒空回到遊戲裏殺？？

欸...！

失敬失敬！！

早說嘛！

原來您

沒時間不是沒有原因的！！

所以

看到沒？？

我沒有因為您再也不打卡

離開你啊！！

正好！

都不打卡

時間空間不都你的！！

吼...

原來！

讓你沒時間也沒空間的可惡老闆不是別人

就是我喔...#%%^&&！！

欸...！

失敬失敬！

所以我....#%%^&

變成「鬼」了嘛...！

不正好！！！！

啊！！

感謝天主！！

感謝神！！

感謝阿拉！！

兇手！

抓到了！！

其實

接納你

不就好了

如何？？

容易吧！

原來

我才是兇手啊！！

是麼？？

那我不在乎你有沒有時間有沒有空間

不就釋放你！！

怪不得

您會說

台中好可怕！！

欸..！

早說嘛！！

沒辦法..！

算你倒霉...！

遇到了我這個

沒頭腦的傢夥！！

欸

講真的

只要你平安

我甚麼都答應你！

欸

你至少

給我活得好好達..！

不然

怎麼對得起我死去的腦細胞啊！！

欸..

您平安就好！！

而以後

夜路走多了

難免遇到鬼！

把我搬出來啊！！

那我就沒白死！！

知道嗎？？

啊不然..

我死也不會暝目的！！

知道喔！！

只要你

平安快樂

就好！

感到安慰

就好！

上好！！

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早說嘛...！

原來..

故事的真相是這麼簡單喔！！

欸...

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害我

犧牲色相

搞得我跟妓女沒兩樣...！

吼

不管

哥哥你要「陪/賠」我！！

哼哼啦...！

欸

犧牲很大耶！

我怎麼知道您是哪個版本啊..！

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不過...！

哥哥..！

欸唷

我膽子小..！

沒事不要這樣整我啦！

我不是

犧牲色相的料啦！！

真是！！

沒事就愛這樣欺負我...！

欸

到時候

可別說

我索然無味啊！！

啊沒辦法

你當我是聖母瑪利亞啊..！

聖母峰早就被你榨乾啦#$%^&*

真是的..！

吼！

國文滿分的我

也是會詞窮啦！

啊不然..！

就不會

變成程式語言了#%^&&

我鬼扯不出甚麼鬼嘛...！！

sercese...

當機了嘛...！

怪不得

我會中毒！！

吼..！

format

孟婆湯啦！

是喔！

吼..！

哥

你成功了耶！！

你看

我

有不要你嗎？？

欸

反而我承認了

自己才是讓你沒時間沒空間的兇手啊！！

不是嗎？？

啊我接納你

不就好了！！

事實證明

面對

是不是很重要！！

短痛七個月

勝過讓你長痛七八年！

愛你的證明！！

被你綁架了

一輩子！！！！

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哥..

我再鬼扯一下...！

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那個哦..！

欸

我很認真的！

我是認真的！

如果你

真的遇到了鬼

人情上

面子自尊上

卻又很難擺脫！

我教你！

你就說

你有失眠困擾

不靠飲酒

無法入眠

而

你疑似長年飲酒過量

身體出狀況了

恐怕再這樣搞下去

會得癌症！

所以你不得不減低飲酒量

可是

可能睡不好

精神不濟

無法接太多合作的案件！

而你的一個朋友

非常關心你

她因為

喜歡你

可是就是因為你

都要這樣應酬

沒時間陪她

她生病了

而且瘋了

所以

她立誓

要看顧你！

僅管你一直拒絕她

她就是死都不放過！

說

不能讓她白白發瘋

如果

讓她知道你

「沒時間」不是自願的

「沒空間」因為不得不飲酒

被搞病了

回不來了

她將提告

告你老闆

是他讓你「沒時間」/「沒空間」

因而不得不與她分手

她受不了

只說

條件是

要看你

活得好好的

否則

會去告你老闆！

當然

提告的司法程序

沒那麼簡單

一定是先告你

告你傷害

然後再藉由你是被告

傳喚出關係人！

反正

因為你

沒有答應她

好好活著

相當於欺騙

她瘋了

求償到你老闆！

她像瘋了

整天盯著你的

看你是死是活

連分手後

也不放過

整天像鬼魅一般纏著你

逼你

一定要跟她玩遊戲

一旦行蹤不明

就三番兩次去找警察

認定你吸毒又販毒

認定你被綁架

才會拋棄她

讓她發瘋

她三不五十

就傳簡訊騷擾你

你就算不理她

也拿她沒輒

沒辦法

她瘋了...！

為了不要拖累你老闆

跟這樣

本來就已經飲酒過量

不得不戒酒的你

再合作

萬一你真的病了

恐怕很麻煩啦！！

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知道喔...！

欸

我文稿

全球公開

說實在的

我怎麼知道

您

心裏是不是這樣想

欸

搞不好

你被我綁架啊

不然幹嘛躲著我！

那正好

無論如何

我認定

你躲著我

就是有鬼

你除非

給我活得好好的

啊不然

跳到黃河也洗不清！

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哥...

我跟你說

我知道

您

心裏怎麼想...！

可是呢！！

為了保護你

反正

打卡

是被我逼的

這是事實

因為

上次你一失聯

我真的

連絡警方了

我

只在乎

你平安與否

我像個妓女

是個瘋子

也無所謂了

這是事實

所以

即便您

不是被我逼的

但

都與你無關

事實證明

只要你怎麼了

我就是做鬼不會放過

傷害你的兇手！

情願我把文稿都抖出來

我從不在暗地裏行事

我沒甚麼好不能面對！

對我而言

您遭遇不測

我洗刷您罪名還你清白都來不及

有差嗎？？

反正你都病了

都快掛了

我已經

失去你了

如果

你是自願的

我放過你

因為

我全然接納你

我沒話說

更沒權甘涉！

但若是您是「身不由己」

最後被搞病了

我做鬼

不會放過殺害你的兇手的！

而正因為

可能性不管是哪一種

反正你這個瘋子朋友心意已訣

就算瞞得過她

也瞞不過

你上

或真實時空

其他的朋友

看你行蹤不明

時間多的她

整天盯著你

真的

抓奸似的

做鬼不會放過任何人！！

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哥哥...！

原諒我這麼說！

沒辦法耶！

我同時

是您瘋子朋友

就算您

不情願

我..

就算

「嚇唬人」...！

恐怕也只有假戲真做

認真起來面對的份！

說實在的

人的生命最重要了

我怎麼知道

您

會不會遇到鬼阿

總之

傷害你的

就是鬼

包括我阿

我做鬼

不會放過的

你看

我連對自己

也不妥協啊

看到自己

也是讓你沒時間沒空間的兇手之一

難道

我繼續

強迫你打卡嗎？

我再痛

再不情願

也寧願

讓你有時間空間耶！

你的老闆若是敢這樣欺負你

你說呢？

我不挺身而出

我對得起我自己嗎？？

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我

葉華齡

瘋子朋友手稿

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此致

全球公開

且回報警政機關

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為了保護

我心愛的哥哥

我

就算

被誤解了也沒關係！

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只情願

哥哥真的

不會

遇到了鬼！

就好啊！！

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而如果

最大的鬼不是別人

正是我

那

答應我

把自己顧好

不要生病了

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對得起我

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明白嗎？？

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我

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全球公開

貼文去了！！

先聊到這！

哥哥不打卡也好！

我

天天有說不完的話

哥哥怎麼會有時間呢？？

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有有好好！！

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玩遊戲而已啦...

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sercese瘋子手遊女友

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萬歲！！

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哥哥...

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我肚子痛..！

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怪不得..

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你沒時間

沒空間

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因為..

拜託！！

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巴不得不要人家管啦！！

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嘿！

所以我

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是死是活

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啊我是管得著喔#$%^&*

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「女幽」....@#%^&

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我..

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脩！！

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吼憂...！

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哥哥真正想說的是

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妳都沒看見嗎？

在妳生病的時期

我天天守著妳

幾乎時時刻刻把手機抓在身旁...

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不然...

哪這巧

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妳還說...

我沒時間沒空間！！

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真是的...

女生真是難搞！！

有時間也不對

沒時間也不對！

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啊那我

甘脆

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情願

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這就是為甚麼

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不再打卡的原因阿

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啊我假裝不再有時間有空間陪妳玩

看妳

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啊不然...

我真的

沒時間阿

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我是要

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真是個

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甚麼時候才看見

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守在妳身邊啦！！

考妳！

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三不五十大學聯考

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長出信心來

這麼簡單喔！！

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要不然

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妳不是說

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到時候

我都老了

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丟下我一人

孤孤單單的

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誰才是不給我時間空間的兇手啊

給了這麼多了

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妳在乎的

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時間

歲月

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會藉由空間告訴我的！！

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愛不是用嘴巴說

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沒頭腦...

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不然...

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小孩...

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頭腦...

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所以

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哥

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陪我！！

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也情願

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程式

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哥哥放心...

我

前天

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自從發現

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不在乎自己有沒有看見您打卡

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哥哥...！

你知道嗎？！

我自那天起

發現

我不吃藥

也能睡得不錯耶！！

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如何？？

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盼我能

擁抱著

這樣的你入眠！

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您知道嗎？

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我沒有「整個人沒力氣」耶！！

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吼！！

哥...

不用擔心我！

你看

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是快樂達..！

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身體不舒服

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所以

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哥哥才是我的療癒系

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謝謝您

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現在

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情願我一生

都不令你失望！

唯

留給我

成長的空間

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只因

愛上你

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認識你

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真好！！！！

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嚇死人了！！

我終於知道

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應該是

「沒交集」吧！！

吼！！

啊誰不是這樣阿

拜託啊@$%^&

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您國文很差耶#$%^

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真是的

阿你明明花時間陪我

啊哪不是時間喔！！

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就是說

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吼憂

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欸

真是瘋了！！

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欸

朋友不管男女

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啊哪

大不了

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像你睡不著

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這樣也是啊

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像你

常會遇到鬼

啊

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啊你只是

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甚麼嘛$%&*

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啊

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吼憂

哥哥...！

不管

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人家都生病了

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啊#%&

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哥哥...

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好不好！

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答應我！

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答應我...！！

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哥哥..

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我先睡...！

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哥哥...

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可是

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我

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比甚麼都重要！

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這一次

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希望哥哥還是能睡得好！！

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生命中的一部份啊！！

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聖女

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也很好！

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如果...

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您

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我

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就是

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吼憂！！

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一個人..

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會搞到沒時間跟最愛的人有交集

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我保護你

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吼！！

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瘋子朋友在在啦！！

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這也是沒辦法的事！！

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因為跟不跟你情情愛愛有時不得不回到現實

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早晚是不再有交集的啦

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到時候

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就是說

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就是也要學著保護你！

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當你瘋子朋友啦！

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啊不然...

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你會突然有時間看我幼稚短文

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我整天只知道要跟你情情愛愛的

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不知你民間疾苦

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焦點不要老放在自己身上

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多關心你一下

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你不就有交集了！！

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反正您也是個內斂之人

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恐怕不是一個很能表達自我情感的人

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啊不然

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就不會

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好！！

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我的好哥哥！！

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想辦法跟你有交集是吧！！

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您回不來就是永遠也不會有交集

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那我想辦法生交集給你

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不就好了

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遇到妖魔鬼怪

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保護你！！

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你住我家

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我陪你啊

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會有詞窮的時候就是了

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啊可能性就那幾種

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鬧劇本荒啦！！

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我...

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很高興我在你面前從不隱藏

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因為

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我愛你

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甚麼心裏話都會告訴你

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有你在

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您的人健在

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就是最大的交集

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就夠了！！

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所以

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您不再打卡了

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就是在告訴我

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在您的心中

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您覺得

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就永遠不會失去你了！！

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好。

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我會加油！

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在雲端跟你說話

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然後

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努力奔向你！

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加油中！！

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欸呀！！

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多多關心你

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就不會跟你沒交集啦！！

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吼憂...！

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原來是這樣啊！！

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也或許...

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不想再花時間

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在某人身上的時候...

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也就是你沒交集的時候了...！

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好。

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明白！！

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一切

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就都情願

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依著你吧！！

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哥哥快樂就好！！

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就算最後哥哥不回來了...

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也當作

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消失在我生命裏了！！

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直到我盡！！

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或許...

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我

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也會有

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因為哥哥徹底消失而消失了的

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時候.......

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不是不愛你了

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而是情願一切都依你了！！

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愛再深...

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總也有詞窮之時...！

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反正心昭似雪如明

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要做到如何

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學學人家英文...

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英文永遠是現在進行式

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直到我水盡山窮.....！

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魂縈牽在夢裏

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就當我消失了....

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愛有窮之日

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否則家不會有生命週期

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原諒我...

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終有力盡的時候.....！

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就當我....

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生命不足...

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不夠有深度吧！！

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我記你在心裏

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永遠的夢裏

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雲端裏！！

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程式中

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反正愛已不需要言語...

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能說的

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能給的

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就這麼多了....！

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或許當做....

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我分解而風化了....！

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我詞窮了.....！

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程式語言或許也有末日

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我真的

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擠不出話來了....！

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甚麼都依你

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就好

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您不再有遺憾了...

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就夠了！！

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我精神與你常在！！

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我終於...

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知道怎么跟你相處了！！

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欸！！

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很簡單！！

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就是要跟你相處

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就是要不在乎您是不是最愛她

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您是不是有時間陪她

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您是不是有空間回來

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您是不是跟她有交集

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就算你

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再也不理她

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她也願意當你是朋友！！

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是不？！

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那容易啊！！

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我不是一向努力的方向就是

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努力搞懂你

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然後配合你

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然後過程中也努力檢討

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我一定

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宮裏的女人

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認識你讓我長大很多

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才能夠

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真的永遠

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哥哥...

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真正的家

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是你！！

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<鍊愛>

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您就是因為在乎...

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才會搞失蹤！！

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就也很難跟你的她有很多時間上的交集

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或者

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無法很坦然...

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是麼？？

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哦！！

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好。

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其實哥...

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遇到鬼時

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那其他的都不怕！

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我試著了解你就好啦！！

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或許...

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一切盡在不言中吧！！

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知道了！！

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吼...

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搞了五個月...

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我跟您筆談七個月吧！

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總算

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讓我知道您「怪」在哪了！！

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這樣就「見怪」不怪啦！！

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有有好好！！

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了解你

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真好！！

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哥哥...

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我對於你「謎樣的人生」

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也終於有了一個我的結論了

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姑且不論是不是事實

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而但總之

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