以下是我看到某參賽作品以後，所寫的留言轉正文，供大家參考。
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvJzqf1UDuB
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感謝參與～227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmD8ZszClVV
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ZhGuhRs5s
老實說，這篇給我的感覺不是十行詩，是散文十行。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCDmr4nogeD
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ku52WdXPl
雖然文章有哲理，但是詩度很低。詩的要素，如節奏、意象、音樂、譬喻都很平淡，甚至欠奉；內容太趨近說明，解釋過多，太黏了。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQNF9SrxEh
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpeMDf4VyNW
～～～～分隔線～～～～227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhlTGBaHMU7
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCuEkLxOp2
我回頭看我自己寫的詩，有些也算不上是詩，例如227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH2JxiGb6Oj
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOD1zJeBByP
〈限制和自由〉227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡks5nopbv0m
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡalLxDclSG6
penana.com/article/1024895227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9nGRlizpPu
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5FItUGnRjx
現在看來，我覺得它不是詩 (但為記錄故，還是收進詩集)。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMTLpV2AMic
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8CTGaLOBw
詩度 0。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoFMtHisnXg
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwGPzI1Csc7
～～～～分隔線～～～～227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAfbjhwShYG
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqRdYIeGz7B
〈問〉227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM4pys935pQ
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH1AksJ0qQp
penana.com/article/1024944227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdw6stpqIfl
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ34uycKERX9
詩度高一點。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO7DyZI5Qpp
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRzIsCZVNRq
～～～～分隔線～～～～227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNKD01WrLTy
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTOes4FPJq
〈摩天之輪〉227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0tbTC1DvxE
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3oh7GIpsI5
penana.com/article/1045705227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwqDrGabiy
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNf9vWVbNxV
詩度再高一點。
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡecFmEToIyq
～～～～分隔線～～～～
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH6xk4wMWWN
〈蝴蝶酥〉227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4gRmvwO3Ai
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdUlHig0yb
https://www.penana.com/article/1597713227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDdPImbUM8A
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4s1LKVrZn8
詩度比前三首都高。
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjvi8HMeVsc
～～～～分隔線～～～～
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhRpfF7Ht0
我最近在看台灣詩人蕭蕭的詩論，詩人有句話簡單卻有道理：「詩，是『換句話說』，『再換句話說』」。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxFPgNd9fUd
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpcGBqcBlat
我在筆記本上面，寫下自己的句子：「詩，是常句和變句的雙人舞。」227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyB4sRdo1pF
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIlovAtACX1
跟你分享。
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ972VwSFmhs
～～～～分隔線～～～～
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNyEV0OWT5w
此外，這篇連結文章也可作參考。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoIZwxRlQd
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeePeliGce
【認識新詩的基本元素】227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXNePM1ochq
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbCW2GFt999
blog.udn.com/shesiya/113597193227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ730Z4PWy2q
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaq9SFRoZuW
我之後應該會就我最近對新詩的思考＆自己詩作/非詩作的例子，寫一篇文章放在我的《寫詩這件事及其他》裡面。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTJEnlPM6P0
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNE3fAnqoo
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVKAy1nwYVf
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKbwUqmSHUr
【我後來回答參賽者「希望較符合你的標準」的留言】
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMjbi2dOwiL
這不是我的標準啦，算是台灣詩人對新詩的定義。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQCBRasXw3A
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsTIsrz6D2W
第二版「詩度」有提升，因為用了複沓/排比結構，綿延的音樂性增加了。227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Vx7u8ZqnS
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9bHNymWNLL
寫詩要多看詩，也不用急，我檢視自己這兩年多密集寫詩的成果，發現好多不熟的，甚至是皮球假裝成果子的，哈哈～
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9iI2QamQuu
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9bQcYySQjU
【這次全新寫的感想】
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmYsTH3JxhQ
我拿自己青澀的詩果，甚至非詩的皮球作例子，無非是希望讀者能做個比較，認識一下不同詩度的詩，長什麼樣子；這裡再拿我寫的〈詠栗〉作例子：
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHW2U6zip8r
〈詠栗〉
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡylAGzPxOSz
殼斗，第一層愛
張牙舞爪威嚇
眾鳥獸，為了
豐美的內在
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgkKjugeNV
剝去愛，尚有
木訥果皮和刻苦種皮
無口而全然
環抱整個子代
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR5m6def2g0
充盈在手中打開
當秋天到來
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7hSGBFinT7
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbNwVhWtI7
如果寫成
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〈詠栗〉
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQau77ftN0g
殼斗，第一層皮
長滿尖刺威嚇
眾鳥獸，為了
內在的果實
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaBWpXp1Mi9
剝去殼，尚有
木質果皮和苦味種皮
沒有裂口而且完全
包覆整個子葉
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRf7brHnGZM
栗子在手中打開
當秋天到來
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZpsoCz3Ffw
詩度就不見啦，成為一篇分行的散文，而且是說明文。
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPxA4ULotGe
會寫詩的讀者，可將自己詩裡的詩句 (＝變句)，換成一般常用的句子 (＝常句) 玩玩看；而苦惱於抓不到詩度的讀者，反其道而行，將自己作品的句子，改動幾個詞彙，以「一般不會這樣用」的語詞 (也可改變詞性) 代替，或可抓到一點詩的感覺。
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMD1dI2m74K
當然，現代詩的面向不僅在於詞彙，但這是一個開始。
227Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4nG7zNPgsX
祝各位被詩淋透，不，淋得半濕就好。
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