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#5

山寨妙麗之我一舉手就是在召喚地獄

辛波棉 辛波棉
Apr 20, 2025 56 2 Mins Read
x
No Plagiarism!2PZLHSKG3PvMkroY9uTgposted on PＥNAＮＡ

我真的有一種恐懼，是對上一種人。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIH6CH6s3bq

像《哈利波特》第一集電影版的妙麗——

老師問題還沒問完，手已經高高舉起，根本就快要站起來那種，彷彿生怕全世界不知道她存在一樣。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSrBgEvnImR

然後黏在老師屁股後面當永不疲憊的「優等生」。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8SUYGyWQj7

但有種人，比妙麗in real life還可怕，60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaTayNpntnH

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3MMuMOvPbP

就是沒能力也不聰明，但是還要舉手讓別人以為他是妙麗那種人。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Zoe0cXCaU

我遇到了，就是X。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe0TeZ7X4fz

一開始就耳聞他是那種「小報告型」人才，專門緊跟上司屁股，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrJY4ALqcU1
60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzl21ADHki

仗著嘴皮子幫人捅刀、搞陰招，辦公室經典劍貨代表——用劍的貨色。60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpDPUxtEIV

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwcZZX3lvDP

等一下，我太含蓄了，他是劍的批發商才對。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ746qM8GD0B

後來某種宇宙業報，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEQBjSiFOpI

也可能是升遷亂流，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgUYrCsbz25
60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6FH1bJml3

他被調來我們team，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYRbtm0D9t5
60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR5C0qHNDiY

命運趁機開了我一個不好笑的玩笑——我還要指導他。60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO0DHWIneSK

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXH1WuNE2RJ

我真的謝謝命運。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdKTBdjj32V

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFvdjTlozs

在我不情不願的開始指導他，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjb9awKv6xl

告訴他什麼東西該怎麼做時。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvgRREQ6ob7

我發誓我每句話都說不到三分之一，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKS27qjZXdj

就被他的

「這個我知道」、「這個我會」打斷。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz85CfXakq0

一次兩次還好，當每一次都這樣，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWsNmiLqAFu

我真的會像康熙的小s一樣。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZQwpHI8DNn

「不要吵！！」（封面圖片支援）

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhwtBxS6PCR

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOPFkouDfHC

然後這位「什麼都知道」的劍貨，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAEQbSeWhqT

想當然，下班之前，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCxGspONNx6

交出了一張全錯的傑作。60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszZGSWuVU0

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQuheMmyjRD

他在錯誤的路上穩定輸出，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4OqINABvwm

簡直擁有史上最驚人的KDA —0/99/0。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IesQ3YIsc

沒有一件代辦事項是對的。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKeyXump8c

Hello?這個我會？這我知道？

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKk4Wxtd7A9

你除了知道怎麼打小報告，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs4cz8GfOsi

背後捅同事刀之外，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Z1UIzbkDM

你還知道些什麼？

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnEGgUDSSW9

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoAVZF1khFt

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bXCT3NcC1

我現在跟瓜爾佳氏一樣，舉手發誓，

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw3gXI7PC53

我真的快崩潰了，60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡueunwpiBtX

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBCt8vgvxPq

只差沒有在雨天奔跑，大喊皇后娘娘申冤。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ML7rPHfcD

我的職位是負責擦屁股的嗎？

我是擦屁股大使嗎？

我是便便使者嗎？

我在替人擦屁股的路上，不斷加班。

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3mY0Mb5xHy

唐綺陽，我是不是又水逆了？

還是我的星盤整個掉進馬桶裡了？

60Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM5y1u2Fku2

誰來救救我好嗎，拜託。

216.73.216.17

ns216.73.216.17da2
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Table of Contents
#0 Intro
#1 平行宇宙編劇產生器
#2 沈默是金，但他沒有這個東西。
#3 巨嬰女友踩地雷，一踩就把我踩成社交祭品
#4 這個作品其實叫做「八婆叔叔的碎碎念」
#5 山寨妙麗之我一舉手就是在召喚地獄
#6 幫我撐10秒———氣爆加班斬
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