Being locked up in the attic for almost three years is no different from a guilty criminal in jail after being released. I never got to see anyone except the young maid around my age to take care of me when I'm hungry and sick.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA2cjQkp6oj
She was kind to me. She pitied me more than her sick brother she told me.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgLZV8xNesl
It took me a year to trust her completely, 'cause I thought she's one of the people who's only kind at first, but my prejudices about her was completely wrong. She's one of the kind, I could tell by the way her eyes look at me like I were a friend to her.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSG5zHglBAP
"Miss, do you want me to open the window?" She'll asked everyday, then I would just nod staring at her. Then I would asked what it feels like outside. She'll told me things, like how the flowers and leaves swayed the moment summer has arrived, like how the roads will get to be occupied by snow when the winter came, like how the trees looks like it just lost life in the fall when the dried leaves fell, like how it felt to live when the spring has to come.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCjq8nwyYcp
I utterly envied her everytime she told me things about outside.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCVXPNeRdK
Though I've seen it all before, I wanted to keep feeling every season of the year. But this time for years, I feel left out. I missed it.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBKidFqEIMX
I only saw one thing outside the window everytime ; and that is the dark forest that seemed to be has no life in it, only ebony. Darkness, all over, even if it's a day or any seasons has to come. An abandoned forest by Gods, based on the legends.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXKFX2AznUG
I could be scared everytime I stare at it, but I never felt like it.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwma8eXcuTI
Because the forest was like reflecting myself.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzTftzG5f3t
Dark. Feel nothing. Just there, staying. It looks dead, it seems dead but not.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnIhQv6bXZX
I feel numb.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCyNd2tm4EH
I didn't see Magnus, it seemed like mother has forbidden him to come here, she know he'll go anywhere just to take this destination to see me. He wouls do something about it, but mother will immediately would come to know that he visited me, and she will take him somewhere he's scared off or take away his important things if he didn't obey her.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwxVWufkp5l
Magnus was sensitive, he was always scared, there was time he was courageous, but most of the time, he'll stay silent when he fear something he couldn't talk about.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkL6xW09jEw
Though I didn't see him, he'll secretly deliver message his message for me to Estelle. I thank all the Gods for mother not knowing it.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYXJ9tr0EjD
He's nineteen this year, I bet.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQxCgmoLaE
And my father...what about him?
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Bq2lJuntE
He wouldn't care about his family. No one ever really cared about this family. I think he's just there to exist. To have someone who will inherit the Barony.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTTxiboeYlg
I really didn't know what he reacted when he heard I'm the Duke's secret lover. Or just like my mother said...the duke's mistress, a whore.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfcC2TlViIO
Magnus knows it was never true. It was really never true.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡceEm9X9EIc
I was never his mistress, I was his lover.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdvfIVyrZGt
I wish I could screamed everything I wanted to say to them, but what's the use? I will look like more a whore to them.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2H8ZbeQLkk
And in my case, that's a reality I'm living in.
136Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyabPabtqFm
A complete agonizing existence.
ns216.73.216.82da2
