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  • Writer
    翎淵
    翎淵
    我是翎淵
    25歲,人形自走打字機,日均產出3000字(血淚比例1:1)。

    我的創作儀式
    ▸ 01:00 AM:靈感開關啟動(大腦比白天清醒300%)
    ▸ 03:00 AM:角色開始不受控(他們有自己的想法)
    ▸ 04:30 AM:望著日出懺悔「明天一定早睡」→ 明日復明日

    讀者須知
    • 每日更新是病,但我拒絕治療
    • 留言區開放「押寶明日劇情」,猜中者獲得「通靈大師」角色客串權
    • 若發現我斷更,請立刻報警——我可能昏倒在鍵盤上

    死亡flag
    「等我寫完這章就睡」→ 通常結局是寫完三章+一篇番外


    I'm Ling Yuan
    25 | A writing machine fueled by insomnia and hubris.

    My Daily Apocalypse
    ▸ 01:00 AM:Characters start misbehaving (good)
    ▸ 03:00 AM:Plot twists attack (better)
    ▸ 04:30 AM:Swearing to sleep early (lie)

    Warning Label
    • Daily updates? More like daily exorcisms
    • Bet on tomorrow's plot in comments - winners get eternally cursed (in a good way)
    • If I miss an update, check if my face is stuck to the keyboard

    Ultimate Lie
    "Just one more chapter..." → proceeds to rewrite entire novel
    See more
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The Daily Disasters of the Useless Superhumans
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Chapter One: The Arrival of Pink Justice
Scheduled: 2025-05-31 16:00

Does "superpower" sound cool? — Until you discover that your ability is so useless, it’s laughable!

Lin Xiaoqiang, a broke community college loser who can barely afford to drink instant noodle soup for three days, suddenly awakens the superpower of "hearing animals’ thoughts."

— Only to find out that within a 10-meter radius, every animal is a vicious, sarcastic master of insults! The neighbor’s fat orange cat mocks him every day for being single, the pigeons on the street gossip about humans’ hairlines, and the stray dogs are secretly plotting a "world domination" scheme…

To survive (and prevent the dogs’ plans), he is forced to assemble a team of "useless superhumans":

  • Wang Meili: Can turn anything pink, but every time she uses her power, it makes the situation worse (like turning a gang boss's gun into Hello Kitty colors).

  • A Zhai: Can stop time for 3 seconds, which only serves to grab the last chicken nugget or trip over his own shoelaces when running away.

  • Qian Duoduo: Anything he touches increases in value, but the counterfeit bills he creates all have the same serial number, causing him to bounce back and forth between "getting rich" and "going to jail."

This group of "Super Useless League" has daily tasks such as:

✔️ Helping the breakfast shop owner control "telekinetic egg frying" (but the eggs always stick to the customers’ faces).

✔️ Stopping A Zhai from using his 3-second time freeze to sneak a peek at the goddess’s phone (only to find that the goddess is also using superpowers to edit photos).

✔️ Fighting the "Superpower Correction Center" — led by an obsessive-compulsive uncle whose power is "forcing everyone to wear turtlenecks instantly!"

When they discover that animals are planning to destroy humanity with their "lazy genes," this rescue mission turns into:

Lying dead on an IKEA display bed, forcing the whole city to do square dancing with a pink virus, and live-streaming the absurd business of selling "turning exes into hamsters."




This is a hilarious comedy about "how loser superhumans turn their daily lives into disasters, but accidentally save the world!"

If you've ever fantasized about having superpowers, after reading this book… you’ll be grateful to be an ordinary person!


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Chapter One: The Arrival of Pink Justice
Scheduled: 2025-05-31 16:00

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