Revision: a lonely girl in this big, horrid world.
P.O.V: 1st-person
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I'm caught up in your expectations
'Clarissa why are these marks so bad??' 'Why are you so pessemistic??' 'Crazy?'
You try to make me live your dream
"You're not here to make people smile. Only reason you're here is to make friends and GO." "You only make me jealous!" "Youre not equal." "I don't trust you."
But I'm causing you so much frustration
I cover my ears to drown out the booming sound but it isn't any use to me anymore. It hurts like hell but its my decision and mine only.
And you only want the best for me
Today.. Today they'll find out why I died inside.
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You're wanting me to show more interest
I loss almost all feeling in my heart. I only feel numb and scared.
To always keep a big bright smile
My fake smiles and forced laughs came along with the package.
Be that pinky little perfect princess769Please respect copyright.PENANAOzcRYteyFV
But I'm not that type of child
Glad it ends today cause im tired and sick of this.
769Please respect copyright.PENANA1vLyQeLdp9
And the storm is rising inside of me
As I burst out for lunch and break to go hide I find no one following me. I was glad till I was spun around to face someone.
Dontcha feel that our worlds collide?
"Where are you going?" he asked, "No where." I huffed and turned to leave. "Youre not going till you tell me why you keep running away!" he shouted.
It's getting harder to breathe769Please respect copyright.PENANAt7jKgyCcSv
It hurts deep inside
I felt my chest tighten. What did he want over all this time?!
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Just let me be769Please respect copyright.PENANAxPd1WymsyU
Who I am
I just fled.
It's what you really need to understand
I didn't care that my face was soaked in tears.
And I hope so hard for the pain to go away
My heart and soul was already broken and retching inside of me.
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And it's torturing me769Please respect copyright.PENANANzmKRCJOap
But I can't break free
"Clar! Stop!" he kept chasing me, I didn't listen.
So I cry and cry but just won't get it out
I felt like the world lost its color.
The silent scream
It became dull.
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Tell me why you're putting pressure on me
I finally found my hiding place and sat down.
And every day you cause me harm
"Clar!" I heard someone pant and sit next to me. "Wow you can run fast." he smiled.
That's the reason why I feel so lonely
I didn't smile back and felt my eyes become watery again.
Even though you hold me in your arms
"Clar..?" he hugged me. But I pulled away.
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Wanna put me in a box of glitter769Please respect copyright.PENANAlzTtK3JMrY
But I'm just trying to get right out
"Clar please tell me what's wrong, you're my world, my perfect doll, my —" "STOP!" I cut him off.
And now you're feeling so so bitter
"Fine then." he straightened up and left.
Because I've let you down
I let my head drop while I sobbed quietly.
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And the storm is rising inside of me
"Why do they take it as a joke? Why do they think im lying when I say that im scared..?"
Dontcha feel that our worlds collide?
I whispered to myself with glossy eyes and looked up at a gang of girls and guys coming towards me.
It's getting harder to breathe769Please respect copyright.PENANACylNU4P0kp
It hurts deep inside
"You're so overly sensetive!" one said, "She's just over thinking!" murmured another and they left.
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Just let me be769Please respect copyright.PENANAzmEpKgcJLV
Who I am
The bell rang as per usual when I stood up.
It's what you really need to understand
I wiped away my tears and pulled up my black hood in shame as I walked the path back to the hell-zone.
And I hope so hard for the pain to go away
I cover my ears then slowly cup my hands around my mouth and nose like an oxygen mask. Its what I always do to stop myself from crying.
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And it's torturing me769Please respect copyright.PENANAtQpwgv5jvO
But I can't break free
I feel cold, that's why I always wear my jacket in case you're wondering. But why would you care about me anyways.
So I cry and cry but just won't get it out
I feel eyes all on me as I walk in.
The silent scream
But I don't say a word.
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Can't you see
Bell rang and I fled again, to the highest part in school.
How I cry for help
I got on it and sat there for awhile, just, thinking.
Сause you should love me
I finished my last thought about life and stood up on the ledge.
Just for being myself
I turned my back to the world.
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I'll drown in an ocean
Pulled down my hood.
Of pain and emotion
And leaned back.
If you don't769Please respect copyright.PENANAoxRVdWoBYl
Save me right away
I expected to be dead. I should be dead. But then I felt something I never felt in a long time.
Love.
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Just let me be769Please respect copyright.PENANAu4JpQMTxeI
Who I am
"Clar!" he patted all around me as if checking im in one piece.
It's what you really need to understand
Once he was sure I was, he hugged me tightly. So tight I felt like I was suffocating.
And I hope so hard for the pain to go away
I felt my shoulder get wet, "Oh my God youre okay..I thought...why...?" I just teared up again and cried softly.
And it's torturing me
He hugged me tighter, "Im sorry I wasn't there...Im sorry I wont understand, Im sorry I-" I placed my index finger on his lip.
But I can't break free
"Its okay." I whispered.
So I cry and cry but just won't get it out
I wiped away my tears and his; and talked through my problem with him.
The silent scream
'Finally' I thought, I could finally tell someone about this.
769Please respect copyright.PENANA2xvTDDpTSp
My silent scream