Awaking in one of the beds at Romangero Hostel, Cay steps out of the dorm room and into the shared kitchen for a glass of water.
“Hello,” says Daniel — a Mexican graduate Cay and Judas briefly met before their heavy slumber. He’s a lone traveller.
“You’re from Mexico, right? Sorry, can’t recall.”
“Yeah…” Daniel fumbles for his words. “You slept well?”
“Yeah. Where’ve you been, mate?” Cay diverts the conversation, hoping to end it soon.
“Eh... lugares? Eh…”
“Sí, lugares. Been somewhere fun?”
“Sí — Trevi Fountain, Piazza Navona, Pantheon. Lovely places.”
“Nice.”
Cay finds badly answered questions frustrating during conversations. Still, something about Daniel makes him seem like the sort of person you could share a pint with. They both return to the room. Cay and Judas begin preparing for their second outing around Rome while Daniel clambers onto his bunk bed — thankfully unoccupied — as the cheap metal frame creaks beneath him.
Trevi Fountain is the obvious first stop from where they’re staying, since most of the early afternoon was spent resting. They take only their wallets, phones, and a bottle of water each. The walk is short and straightforward, as shown on their phone GPS apps.
The fountain’s monumental design is only tarnished by the swarm of tourists surrounding it — most taking photos exclusively of themselves before uploading them to their social media. The need for public affirmation of one’s travel status seems deeply rooted in every conscious mind, especially those of foreign visitors.
The Spanish Steps are less impressive. They offer a view of the city’s high street — designer shops, health-conscious food stalls, and overpriced “Italian” restaurants that aren’t very Italian. The steps lead up to Fraternita Monastica delle Sore di Gerusalemme, while below sits Piazza di Spagna. Its central fountain, situated beside the steps, is a dwarf in both design and scale compared to the overcrowded Trevi Fountain.
Judas mutters a chant as they descend the stone steps:
Spanish Steps, step-by-step;861Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Kjs8xvp9n
Signorita falls, signore rolls;861Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5Ld9u7UKY
Oh what the heck, they’re just a flight of steps.
Perhaps they’re off to a poor start — a result of putting too much faith in glowing online reviews by amateur tourists. Cay silently curses the overflowing crowd but holds no blame for Nicola Salvi’s beautifully sculpted fountain, nor the elegantly curved marble steps. The problem lies not with the creations, but with what they attract.
The Pantheon, with as many footsteps upon its floor as the ground can support — save for the staff and guards behind small boxes — maintains the same calming atmosphere as most Catholic churches across Europe. The room is almost silent, interrupted only by the faint snapping of cameras and phones, most of which point skyward toward the open oculus in the ceiling. Life inside the Pantheon would be dim if not for that perfectly measured circular beam of natural light.
It’s not that Cay and Judas are disappointed by the attractions. It’s just that a culture of elevated expectations — cultivated in England — has made disappointment far too easy. The need for “ambitious standards” set by elite nations becomes contagious. It infects not only those within them, but also those orbiting around.
“Be good to Jenna, and take care of her!” said her mother, Kuan, as the group wandered around the city centre of Bath, looking for the promised freshers’ week event happening in several local pubs. Jenna and Cay were beneath an Indian restaurant when her mother caught sight of them.
(“It wasn’t that hard to spot her, dear,” Kuan explained later. “She’s the only brunette Asian among your lot.”)
“Nice to meet you, Auntie,” Cay said — just moments before Kuan bestowed her expectations on him.
“Oh no! The pleasure is mine!” exclaimed Kuan, in a pitch more appropriate for theatre than greetings.
She added, “I presume it’s freshers’ week activities, yeah? Call me Kuan.”
“Yes, Auntie.” Cay still found it awkward to address someone senior by their first name, particularly someone from Taiwan.
Kuan left the two after the brief encounter, returning upstairs to where Dylon — Jenna’s father — waited for his wife, the curry now lukewarm.
The whole encounter left Cay and Jenna feeling awkward. Take care of her, Kuan had said, loud enough for everyone in the group to hear with painful clarity. They shuffled from one indistinct pub to another, while student leaders handed out rubber bracelets for drink discounts faster than the freshers could process what was happening.
A few individuals splintered off to stake out the bars themselves, including a young Caucasian mother named Charlene, who let a tall, baby-faced man order two pints of cloudy cider on her behalf.
That fresher event ended with the group fragmenting into even smaller clusters, each team moving from one bar to the next, hoping one of them would finally serve proper tap alcohol. Cay and Jenna walked back to the student hall, barely finding their way in the dark after sunset. They talked about Jenna’s upbringing; Cay hadn’t yet built the courage to answer any questions he considered too personal — as many parts of his life were.
“I’m so sorry my mum embarrassed you in front of everyone,” Jenna said, once the others had gone their separate ways.
“She was just worried about me, like any mother would be.”
“That’s OK. I could imagine my mum pulling something like that too,” Jenna replied with a polite giggle.
“Well... nice meeting you. Good night,” she said as her sweet smile vanished behind the closing door.
It wouldn’t be my first embarrassment that I had to pretend I was fine with, Cay thought later, after his shower, staring at his reflection with mild detachment.
It wasn’t fine — not for Cay. It wasn’t the embarrassment itself that got to him, but the unwanted attention it attracted. Pulling the duvet (what a strange term for a thick blanket, he thought) up to his shoulders, he remembered the laughter and pointed fingers from his early school years.
He didn’t sigh. He simply buried it — deep at the back of his mind — alongside the others.
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