在走路、在看電影、在說話，做任何事情的時候腦子都會一直轉，有時很想把它拿出來對它大罵：你給我差不多一點喔！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqoghgVTmD
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以寫文章來說好了，想寫點什麼，拿起筆，卻什麼都寫不出來。如同在沙漠中快要渴死，把身旁的水袋拿出來用力的一直擠、一直擠，最後袋子破了還是沒有一滴水。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcPzdjmYHMt
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說到底為什麼要追求靈感呢？407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxNMR9ObIkf
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這個世代最常說的what how why who where。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXMtbTZjgG
就連保全，是個就連我去別人家大廈時，一個普通的保全都會問我的：「你是誰？你在做什麼？你要去哪？」這樣一些哲學性的問題。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7w6a8ljI8w
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如果我沒有答案，沒有自己做這些事為了誰、為什麼的理由，我怎麼能真正意義上的說我在完成夢想的道路上？407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxNTE65fVm
我曾經以接近病態的情緒死死抱著這樣的理念。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMkzuOOREjm
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAs6BXCei6E
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxLEXpjAVI
所以我認真想過，多認真呢？大概是我把三色豆從蛋炒飯裡全挑出來，這樣超高層度的認真。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIm0owFTVrl
思考到我想再把腦子拔出來大罵：你還不TM給認真點！到底……407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrHrnJwRkJj
407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKDxL9tzBg
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為、什、麼、要、靈、感？！407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9JHEmsdNjc
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「因為沒靈感，會很想死啊。」407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnXJK5EjJ3X
不是隨便就能掛在嘴邊的那一種死喔，而是真的想從各種意義意上化為塵埃的那一種。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQSABWfszv
但如果我用口語來說，我想會用「輕描淡寫」吧，因為發現了這些事兒，不為任何人。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr6KAk1GSua
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很討厭沒能力的自己，但無論如何都無法將這份憧憬給捨棄。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLH1pF0N1S9
就是抱持著這種想法，才能苟延殘喘的走到現在吧。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnd2CiWdKAH
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每當夜深人靜想到這些，腦中就會浮出日本文學作家-太宰治，在人間失格中的開頭：身而為人，我很抱歉。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyLkDcoYwd8
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不過人呀，就是會在掉入近乎絕望的深淵之後，才發現另一種生存的方式。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXqzmTbZzMx
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所以我一直寫，把筆拿在手上，如鏟子一般，向孕育我的大地不斷的鋤著。每天戰戰兢兢、抱持感謝的，在我化為塵埃之前。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBIoEHJzNTD
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對不起。身而為人，我很感謝。407Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmcXK0ya4lC
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