一起床已到九時，要還的時間未免太多了吧。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMHxYKtwhx5
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我換好衣服出門，在等待升降機時發了「投降」的短訊給上司。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Ut6UiKI3C
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhLyR1Og3dX
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到車上也是一直的休息。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW3Dur1AZ2Z
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhm328Iyfqf
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSAdU4MIY7I
看來世事還真的是等價交換，你總不可能永遠的利用著時間而放棄休息。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA235bybUu6
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563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ2nipn7QxL
回到公司也沒甚麼特別的事，但「自由兼職者」的工作由我要來善後，太多的錯處。我也有疏忽監管的責任。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgXflHjO47A
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLAOm2pxkN7
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcYJgnQmDuu
由於工作的關係，我盡量也沒有找她，忍耐着。也沒有什麼想太多，也做着一些閒事、加入同事說關於無聊的話題。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡojbzomrIXm
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA6xQyLa3z5
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無聊的應對。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0bHv4kqDw6
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjXYxZZLbn
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKyK69k46b
心底裏整天都在思考「愛」的問題。究竟愛是什麼？我的愛和她的愛又是什麼？那是因為昨日聽到初中女孩們對話的因由。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNDgCF4mNWn
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtWVojVuzWZ
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因為我對愛的觀念很不同，對我來說找到愛的人、對的人我就會非常珍惜，儘管美麗的誘惑或者好感，我也覺得比不上她。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUpQLLdvPIW
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqzVDQrFzPr
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那是確確實實我真誠的答案。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUjuonqO5x9
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRPQlCk3hEN
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是十多年來得出的答案。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjISGRJa9D6
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw9eEXmFoGD
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfUv251FSEA
與在我讀設計後，我很清楚自己的需要，也很相信自己的眼光。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAEdCQethkf
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrYMV73rxAv
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjubmlA5UDq
而我相信現在的她需要的應該是熱戀的感覺，看到她的反應，就和我了解的她一樣，寫到這裏嘆了一口氣。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSUSv4t5hsz
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmaAud1ckbO
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ68JbUFlxWr
我也很相信是我「離開」了十個月的報應。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPmQA8nXaxy
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyAtBpe7suh
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WPiO0lUn8
我很清楚她需要的是什麼，就是原本我會做的東西：563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3cbWSqlP02
精心設計的旅程；563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7fuxUKDeOi
驚喜的禮物；563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkB1gL2erIR
做給她的手工藝；563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡivtKwAqJ6c
畫給她的畫；563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsXBQdkMff7
還有勇敢果斷有正義感的「本我」。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GNLoIk2Oj
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOyxJXvLIz
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMteYgQndQ6
結果整天都在思考，也想起MLA的歌，內容說着不同的偉人對於愛的解讀：563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrq63BnOMc3
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuiCmjeTTDI
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsh4WEqplR3
「耶穌說的愛是無條件的、獻身的，563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10M6QV5Ef9
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPpFHZRacjc
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYZrGlgbyc0
奧修說的愛是能量的互動、是自由的、無束縛的，563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ADkdJ8hYd
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqGxUuSbVH8
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmTlPJHYL4
昆德拉說的愛是機遇的、偶然的、命定的，563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDbYvEeFP2a
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT1v7kwUngM
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAWTyQNqghJ
高達說的愛是刺激的、好玩的、有今生沒來世的、哲學的，563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTi7GwKIu1j
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz1M8o9EFr6
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwotwMP92up
小津安二郎說的愛是溫柔的、隱藏的、非愛的，563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFghfsxwffL
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv6vYreOUE6
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk28mzKBSgr
畢卡索說的愛是經驗的、性慾的、美好的，563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8NLHOBLpea
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkMjy5eztVE
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夏卡爾說的愛是聖潔的、救贖的、唯一的。」563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNxDfpll7VS
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbpV4qwZGCt
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聽着也很難理解。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXqaEldmcPS
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晚上九時，我到運動場跑步時，查了一下維基百科，「愛」和「既視感」。「本我」是對我有感覺的字，很喜歡。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQRKAxL6Odo
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsVX8fzXvG
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqVlrJtDRmw
既視感也是其中之一，因為我是一個很愛做夢的人。做夢時，常會看到一些似曾相識又毫無記憶的事物。現實時，看到一些在夢中看過的事物感到似曾相識。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOX0h8uqIDD
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHMxpyb31j8
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsthtjctm8Q
我會感覺到很神奇，很浪漫。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2q2CyUbFK4
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lCaVmR2rZ
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpsBxhXCUaM
而「愛」在我看完維基百科，理解的是「人類的本能」，過於複雜是因為人性。基本有寫到愛情三角論：親密、激情、承諾。而衍生出的一個「元素表」，直白而又殘酷。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQljPWeGMcf
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJo8fnhcou
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愛的風格比較有趣的是利他的愛：563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMwX4y7MD0k
「完全無私的愛，可不惜傷害自己或捨棄任何東西，重視神交。現代多半喜歡稱呼這種愛為『真愛』。」563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhaTNRExRi
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ7yAseIU12
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我大概對她就是這一種愛。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuT8QLfRUTD
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNdawJfXlu
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6yevzTTXJR
愛的階段說出來就像她在我「離開」短短時間的轉變過程。情慾、吸引、最後依附，到情消失後，由熱愛轉為友愛，由浪漫轉為好感。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkyv92H8Tl1
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoxEZoUTP9
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和她那一天告訴我的一樣。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrYs9amft89
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMouL0yiaBU
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfsalahzdyC
回家洗澡後，我拿出為她畫的貓畫簿，那是我很久之前已經開始畫的畫簿，那是我想念她的方式。而我不否認很久也沒有畫新作品，可能是覺得我和她的時間還有很多，可以慢慢到一起生活時才畫我們一起養的貓而特意留給牠們幾頁。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Oi0EZEEG6
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDMUjjFFppy
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeeVbFosZfQ
也可能是這兩年我對於貓沒有太大的靈感，在我生活的地方，流浪貓走的也走了，而她養的一隻貓也同樣走了，這也是令我很傷心的事。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRvl4bHUy6
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb75zXqgZ30
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVh2ej26y5p
在夜裏，我畫的貓是我在「第四天」拍下的照片作參考──即是她家裏的貓。那張照片是我的左手摸貓貓的頭，而貓貓也很溫馴地把頭向左貼着我的手。而我用了我很少用的木顏色作畫，那木顏色是她和我一起買的。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNLRDFv2125
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靈感也到了，影響了挑選顏色的感覺。用了紅色代表我，藍色代表貓貓，取代了鉛筆的黑色。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkCeexXXRIy
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5IKJcV5qzE
563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡspRiZYP3CC
我就這樣坐在工作台前，在殘黃的坐枱燈下作畫，直至太陽升起。563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXdDOTqDRt7
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563Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNkRsmj29Ut
完成一張畫。
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