Prompt: Into the woods
There's an old riddle I tell to the folks who come tired to the halfway house.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSaZIFcyKQ8
'How far can you walk into a forest?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZReKjMkSGI
Some of them know the answer, some don't.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPyHkplfJme
'Halfway. Now take your rest.'
The Wood of White Nights was my home.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1oRncjFszI
It was a place between two places where rarely people had a reason to stay. Two poor towns, farming areas, or so they claimed, because the crops always failed and never the baleful cry of an animal I heard.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz9CskyDzuA
People had their own reasons for passing by the Halfway House, and I had my own reasons to live there.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡopjd2nZ5H2
I suppose, if nothing else, it gave me something to do.
It was a hobby of sorts - I had always had a way of talking to people, and at the Halfway House I could learn about a different life every day. All the sadness and - occasionally - gladness that would lead someone to stay at a dying building in a forest full of dangerous beasts.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hx5cWMcZO
For some, perhaps they were seeking something. Tales of lost treasure in the Woods, or old friends who stopped returning letters or calls. It's strange, really - the people who were looking for something were lost themselves.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7I7r06TMxD
The House provided refuge for others, a place where the outside world no longer mattered, a place where time itself failed to keep composure, a place where they could escape the judgements and expectations.
And I suppose that for a while it kept my interest. Lives and stories were precious things and the knowledge of each one was like a temporary high of intimacy - something that I could never have achieved elsewhere.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUeog39iE6
But too soon, I learnt that life was like a loop, a pencil retracing the same track over and over again - I met the same people, the same stories, the same tired faces with eyes of broken promise.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VoqkBcINy
There was nowhere else for me then, of course. So I stayed. And with every passing year, I couldn't help but feel that I was looking into the mirror every time I greeted a lost soul into the House. I was running. Away, or to, even I didn't know. But I was running, by staying still.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ42JaB3Sd7I
You see, runners inevitably hit a brick wall. For them, it was death. For me, it was an old friend who returned as a stranger under a rain-soaked sun.
'Welcome to the Halfway House.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW8pDMuPzWh
The girl was dripping, and the warm rays of light from the sky had done nothing to dry her. She was English - with those perpetual dimples and perceptive eyes - and her hair was dyed an angel white. She was short - and her complexion said that she couldn't have been any older than twenty seven.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7YgJw1vJ8q
'You must be tired. Sit, please.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ8jf2Gvu3m
She remained on her feet, and walked up to me.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWolddUlF3B
'Do you know how far you can walk into a forest?' I asked her, seeing myself ask myself the same question from the inside of the droplets hanging at her eyelashes.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNh6xTsD33h
'Halfway, you bastard. It's me.' The moment that tears began running down her cheeks and not just residual rain was misty, like a watercolor - perhaps she was crying before she even entered.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8fzBQ6oxGZ
'Aria!' I embraced her, but only lightly, conscious of my suit getting wet. 'You're looking younger than I last saw you.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTJwJIAIwpr
'Please don't give me that bullshit Al, I'm old. I'm too old for all of this.' She let go, and finally sat down. She never liked being told when to do things.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwq0eGmKNLV
'Another one?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhU9W8fKCpT
'What do you think? Of course it was another one.' She pulled out a few sepia polaroids from her satchel and gave a heavy sigh at them before handing the stack to me.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzJAD5AA5ZA
'What was his name?' Aria always picked the ones with the lovely smiles. Here - riding on his back in a park, laughing. Here - him making a mess of the spaghetti. Here - a kiss.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡANIrm0Cs9K
'Jacob. Jacob Ryans.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Oni17A96d
'He's very beautiful. You two look so happy together.' Here - both of them asleep on a couch. Here - a walk on the beach with a white dog.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡURj8vXjH6X
'Were, Al, we were happy.' She collapsed into an outburst of bodily fluid again. Crying, bleeding, orgasming, I never really got the differences. There's always the pain and the pleasure, and at the extremities, they merge into the one - like a great circle of emotions. 'God, Al, I don't know why I keep doing this to myself.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl83UguVSDz
'Don't say that. What you do is a good thing. You give these men an extra few years of happiness. You know that all these people would have died if you didn't come into their bodies.' Us Muses could pass into any dying body and grant it with immortality so long as we stayed inside. She was the Aria - the outpour of raw emotion. I was the Allemande - the noble, the detached.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXWYn7Mb73Z
'But you know what I took away? Closure. And not having that - that hurts more.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbIgCEMiPm9
'You can still fix things.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2KVb7sP7Ze
'Al, you know I can't do that. I can't tell them, I can't leave them in any way. I loved them all. I love them all.' She took the photos back and took a long look at the one by the beach. 'The dog was called Marbles. You like riddles, Al? Why's the dog called Marbles?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJkarad8xxq
'You tell me, sis.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSS82WkWNfX
She laughed. 'He's batshit bonkers. But adorable all the same. We got him from the adoption place in - I don't even remember. But he was heard barking from the sewers. His previous owner left him there.' A corner of the English girl's smile appeared and faded just as quickly like an imprint from the past.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwPgHhOPM5M
'I just don't know why I keep making the same mistakes.' She folded the photos.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkrxt0Mv3Q0
'Well, sis, life is like a loop - '938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3QNa8qjutj
'Can you just shut up for once, Al? Not all of your goddamn philosophies are goddamn right. You're stuck here for what you've done, how can you say you know about life?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIet2lUQSlX
I stayed silent. She was in a mood.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4rWr3IDyye
'It's like a spiral.' She said, suddenly. 'You always think you're heading somewhere but you just keep going round and round. You know the funny thing about spirals?' I didn't interrupt her - it was rhetorical, and I would only frustrate her further. 'You can draw an infinite number of spirals. An infinite number of lives. They get close, but the only place they really touch is at the center, at the end. At the end of them all.'
Having Aria around was always difficult, but I know she did it for me.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI023iMPgWP
You see - I couldn't actually leave the woods. I had made a mistake, a long time ago. Aria takes photos of the world for me, with an old polaroid that she never found the strength to throw away. After a few decades I had had enough of the cities and mountains and lakes, and I asked if I could just see her life.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi0BHoMeMxL
It was always about the love, for her. I never understood why. But she would purposefully try to find the ones who were in a healthy relationship, the ones whose boyfriends or girlfriends were always by their hospital bed.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡclRzY8QB15
And once those dying bodies woke again, she would never let those people go, not until she had to leave. She stayed with each one only five, ten years - you see, the bodies don't age once we're inside. To keep us safe, she left before it would become noticeable.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksf7G4hPWn
I suppose I should have thanked her more than I did.
'You're still here.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTupLwEIVXD
It was morning, and Aria was sitting, the English girl, in the dining room. She had never stayed longer than the night before. 'I need a break from it all.' She sighed.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqMLNuHxNKi
'You're at the right place.' I took the place beside her. 'The cornflakes are shit.' I reminded her. 'Have the yogurt.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJJywnv0ppz
'How did it feel, Al?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMr9GHUFBLp
'How did what...'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbRFl83i71d
'To do what you did. To do that to all those people.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpXkNZBbrYa
'Why are you asking me this now?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZumMqoaQaj
She laid her head into her palms. 'Because nothing has changed.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhx4powQTp1
She didn't want to say it, but I knew what she was thinking. She was tired of being trapped in this world with me.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6atKfXf6oO
'Sis, I'm sorry.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqUp51gHkh
She looked up, crying again. 'But were you really?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiUT37gpaVI
I couldn't answer that. One option would be a lie and the other would break her heart.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF950ykVNWj
I stood.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5KvAdIiycI
'I'll go get you some yogurt.'
'Do you ever wish you could die?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fLiUBjSIM
Aria was slowly retreating into a shroud of depression.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvCmNeykfUx
'No. There's so much to live for.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1lyFL6BO5V
'But I've seen it all. There's nothing left.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXPJcf2uwxv
'Don't say that.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxOyYpgZ8f7
Even I was surprised at how much she cried those few days she stayed at the Halfway House. It bothered me. I never wanted to see her like this.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf8i4vhLnaJ
And it was only then that I decided to do what I knew was possible several, several years ago.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6XVyorh86a
'Sis... I can get you out.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZVzSftx9bN
'...what do you mean?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡocF9VBJdE5
'I can get you out. I can get you back home. But you have to be patient.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡslXz9HZfa6
'...I don't understand.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGiMftov7du
'Back home, sis. Away from all of this.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMq7wdXtv2I
'But how?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ5nCkjb3PN
The tears had stopped and I knew I had made a promise that I couldn't bear to break.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAomkCn1vcY
'You'll understand tomorrow. Sleep on it.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuFVmEswgzF
She turned away again.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNanW9fdxwj
She didn't say thanks - reminding me even now how I had mistreated her before.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6rg7lgMRWh
'Remember. You'll have to be patient.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDoWkslYMxK
I wait a few moments for a response before I close her door.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIUwLeztgpB
It was time for me to leave. To run away, to run towards.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaWDE87yW6y
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An English girl with hair angel white, kneeled before the gates of her home.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEgT1sVMVgJ
'Father?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZAkdH6eyi
'Aria. You know you're not allowed here.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwxmKLyQAOz
'It's not Aria.'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSYDsWHcxJi
Muses could go only into dying bodies, of which there were none in the Wood of White Nights, where time itself lay tired.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwO7rOnGzHl
But there had been one - a girl with cancer, who should have died seven years ago, who woke at the brink and came to the woods.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLr6XYGRFgv
'Allemande?'938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8JSLiPODO
I could feel him, ready to send me back to the forest in a single spin of the landscape.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk33VYXRfek
'Wait.' I say.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZu5oFiwDT
I know what I need to do to make things right. I know what I need to do to pay for my past. I know how to send Aria home.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GRbAzZYkS
Because I realized, longer ago than I believed, that I was wrong. Life didn't have a simple shape, an order - life was a mirror, in the corner of the universe, in which you could see eternity, and the reflections of a thousand others -938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr7L32TZaWz
And so I will suffer the reflection of the suffering I caused.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5UsxjBFnQz
I had been running - not away from the forests in fear, not to the forests in hope of comfort, but to hide from the forests that festered within myself.938Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUqlYInta9A
And when all the pain finally ends, they will offer me the heavens once again in forgiveness - but I would stay only a moment to say farewell - and return home, to the Halfway House.
