根據居民的指示，我沿著竹林小徑走了一整天，終於到達目的地：一間全竹結構的寺廟。它比我預想中更為破落，冷冷清清的。我抬頭望向高高懸掛在山門的匾額，寫著「竹寺」。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUuLspMhzAB
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBVEA2UPn4e
蠻有意思的名字。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5lu3jFDg1D
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3EdfpzKSU
當我正要邁步內進時，一個打扮樸素的瘦削大叔剛好開門踏出。四目交投，雙方都愣住了幾秒。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7XRBLPLDhk
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOfOE7ZoYNC
「歡迎內進。」沒等我回答，大叔已轉身為我引路。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9umeomYzWO
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkP9KnzUp4
眼見天色漸暗，我不再磨蹭，看能否找到綫索，省卻逗留此地的時間：「不好意思喔，大叔！請問黃XX女士住在這裡嗎？」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa1MuXFaKyV
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA7fnuNwjBU
大叔的腳步突兀地戛然而止。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6y4ldcnsqB
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNOe41Hjier
是我的提問過於唐突嗎？369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHXNblaphh
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjnfMNyADh8
大叔回頭仔細打量我，神色疑惑，似乎在猜測我和黃女士的關係。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYyuOHC5qsV
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOVaNaQ0Kzg
「有人託我將信件親手轉交予黃女士。」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL9H0J9lMnc
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMw91Bp3N5F
「黃女士已離開這裡好一段時間，不知何時會回來……甚或是不知會否回來。」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8CCtXWthcG
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8zjrIdQ7ci
「她有透露去處嗎？」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7zcZAqcBOe
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1u9nZWIdnW
「沒有……我帶你去她昔日的房間試找綫索。」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP0dVXAFM5y
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz90dA2dJn4
大叔再次邁步，步履沒有之前的輕，重若銀鉛。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62TZhIKRUl
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdkgCNgVFiR
陰冷的空氣，空洞的房間，慘白的牆身，最基本的傢俬和雜物。沒有生活的氣息。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJU4bXhzsHq
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm9nWf4dCxg
「剛才在門外碰見你，也還真令我驚訝。」大叔沒有進入房間，逕自在門外呢呢喃喃。「竹寺曾香火鼎盛。後來毗鄰的兩個小鎮分別新建更大更金碧輝煌的寺廟，無意間將信眾分流開去，到來竹寺掛單的僧侶亦逐漸減少，住持最終徇眾要求到另一寺廟主持大局。他指派我長駐於此，打掃清潔，說要方便途經的旅客。我一直覺得他想多了，豈料今天就遇見你。」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWEKCNiYDIJ
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ56GlmLYMxi
「可能佛祖不想我白走一趟。」我話中有話，提醒侍奉佛祖的大叔不要忘記佛祖的存在，萬萬不能撒謊。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTlN3qqF4E
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYPxygvU9nF
「我可以明天帶你見住持。他有掛單紀錄，可能有黃女士的聯絡資料。」大叔也不是省油的燈，簡單幾句就將我逼至沒有退路的位置：「但我希望你能先對我坦白事情的前因後果。住持是個大忙人。我可不希望為他增添不必要的麻煩。」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2VE3fAoei
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9IIjNX8Egv
我只得坦白交代。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Fq1FABghV
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmuHI9jt6Dw
我的妻子過身了。臨終前，她希望我能預留一年時間為她完成唯一的遺願：親手將遺書交予離家出走多年的生母——黃女士。事隔多年，黃女士曾在多個地方落腳。我每次根據綫索趕至時，她早已遷居。輾轉間，我追尋至竹寺……369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqA2E89xt7R
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFej4A1fUyp
「距離一年限期，還剩多少日子？」大叔生起關切之情。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIvQlX4uIw
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDTHbAVrL48
「三日。竹寺很可能是我的最後機會。」我加倍留意他的神色舉止。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsjBdXMatzn
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9EZrKWLIM9
「不考慮延長？」大叔表現出來的的關切絕對超過一個陌生人該有的限度。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡevZbKLwck6
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtGqcWA0aFT
「妻子信緣份。她認為努力過後仍沒能找到，證明彼此有緣無份，毋須強求。她還叮囑我要燒毀遺書。」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7d6SVzwgNn
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7HExiCXHNV
大叔若有所思後，講出驚人的一句：「若果一年期限屆滿時仍找不到黃女士，介意給我看看遺書嗎？」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYR7q1o3HF6
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqOg0NZntVs
「極度介意！」我心裡認定大叔有事隱瞞。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJVK2oEYgvA
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwjLldenEns
尷尬氣氛令大叔不再多話。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZEQKNMln4
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFyxklQzKbc
晚餐後，大叔在其他地方忙著，我則留在房間對著愛妻的照片痛哭一場。哭過以後，壓力得以紓緩，但心頭卻未能添加半分澄明，混沌混濁。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoSa3PZ6hrG
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWS7lCMSdy
我離房在寺內溜達散心。逛著逛著，忽爾看見大叔彎腰對著花園中的小樹喁喁細語，臉上盡是蜜甜。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVDrlUVMHhK
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVCit6vF3pp
我上前跟大叔打招呼。他微笑回應，和顏悅色，渾身散發著慈祥氣息，沒有白天時的隔膜。我嘗試放下戒心，開心見誠與他聊天。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡowswju7yyl
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ7ZcdrEzDJ
不知怎地，聊著聊著，話題竟牽到大叔的心事去。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRTuT3yluCH
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcPTBJK1bNa
「貪，使人執著於一切順情之境。嗔，使人執著於一切違情之境。痴，使人不明白真理，致使生起貪嗔。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlPfvGX4uQp
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMq6V5gKb8Q
我痴愚半生，痛苦不已。到此地求法，希望住持指點迷津。但他認為我凡心未盡，要我留在這裡靜思。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU8Vhz2Apng
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvpINaWnHnT
我在竹寺侍奉多年，住持依然不為所動。我以為他在敷衍我。今天遇到你，我才明白住持所言非虛：任何無關的人事物都可輕易勾起我對逝去伴侶的思念。」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi3fu4UAbzm
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfUQQQ7Vx5Z
我終於明白初時大叔何以對我不太友善。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmuNcrZaQVc
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTF0mCrpTAl
將心比心。喪妻之後，任何人事物均能勾起我和對太太的思念。我曾抱怨上天幸災樂禍，何解不讓我安靜避世。我已盡力放下身邊一切，辭掉工作，不聯絡親友，遷出愛巢，但偏偏愛妻的遺願就是要我去彌補她的畢生遺憾！我沒有一刻能放下她，因為我的分分秒秒就是為她而過。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX2mLnqSc2S
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDmexuTe1a2
那種痛苦實非筆墨所能形容。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10MhYvSkjl
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcAKAvxCDgz
「你的妻子真聰明，給你的痛苦設下一年期限。只要你在這一年裡拼命為她圓願，往後也就了無遺憾或悔疚。我可沒那麼幸運，不知要拖著這副臭皮囊乾等到哪年哪月哪日……」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFm0akF7O2O
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuP1SSqYzDZ
說罷，他跟我和小樹說晚安，然後揚長而去。
翌日，我翻遍整間竹寺亦找不到大叔，只在他的房間找到他留給我的手繪地圖。我跟著地圖的指示走了大半天，來到住持現處的寺廟。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8M9jX4xzG3
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ezPhvJusV
住持聽罷我的經歷後，不禁黯然慨嘆：「黃女士始終凡心未盡……」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzdp6TzWf8s
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WWa5el26W
黃女士當年拋夫棄女，與情夫私奔。豈料甜蜜日子不長久，情夫患急病逝世。黃女士大受打擊，認為是自己作孽甚深，連累情夫。她來到竹寺，望住持能指點迷津。住持認為她深陷激動情緒當中，容易作出錯誤選擇，逐要她在竹寺靜思己過。可惜她半夜逃離。當黃女士重臨竹寺時，她已花光積蓄在黑市做手術整容及變性，以情夫的外表現身……369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmfKJartgsV
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV06NburhcJ
「大叔就是黃女士？」我不禁驚呼。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn6FBrucAGw
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD4QAWpYtNr
震驚之情瞬間即逝，取而代之的是說不出的矛盾。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmKp31FJiX
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2DkvqX4xYx
這個人，我恨不來，亦原諒不了。
翌日，我和住持往竹寺走一趟。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwn4KCILJX1
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ309V5rp0S8
寺前，我倆不約而同抬頭望向匾額。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf0YfkeehGc
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7kcBOwjDkS
「你知道『竹寺』何以得名嗎？」住持問。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdD4CwU0OhL
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT2NNJF4djZ
「等？」我的猜想有如初來之時。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvWa3GdCp4D
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWKCzJWAeAx
「這名字只不過是客觀描述寺廟本身。」住持揚手指向全竹結構的寺廟：「大家實在想多了，對自己的想像投放情感，賦予它過多的意義，致使看不見眼前真象。」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXocQ3podo
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbY2HBznV41
我驀地憶起大叔前夜的說話。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvX8eBBpwxx
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLFhfRLyB7h
住持直接走往花園。不出他所料，小樹已被連根拔起，樹下土地被挖出一個大坑，足以容納一個成人。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCZfxnoD20k
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNAyDMpjKF
我心頭一涼，頓時明白那是甚麼一回事：多年以來，情夫的屍首一直埋在這裡。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKpsjN0OhVP
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTUiKNGWwj9
我鼻頭一酸，淚如雨下。369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpQ5BcazlRE
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqwaQ4KoWHF
「『強逼自己放下執著』也是一種執著。」369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJXKbCnOsJ2
369Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHTOsTXdlw5
住持淡然望天，開始為一切生者亡者誦經。
