根據居民的指示，我沿著竹林小徑走了一整天，終於到達目的地：一間全竹結構的寺廟。它比我預想中更為破落，冷冷清清的。我抬頭望向高高懸掛在山門的匾額，寫著「竹寺」。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ86l18NLwY
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ6UeDpWMwC
蠻有意思的名字。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAlRhuHHwq1
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡStRfDhnmEf
當我正要邁步內進時，一個打扮樸素的瘦削大叔剛好開門踏出。四目交投，雙方都愣住了幾秒。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQnEWdRXByW
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx9232Ij7fF
「歡迎內進。」沒等我回答，大叔已轉身為我引路。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡae6zxiCt8i
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTw2yISAT0M
眼見天色漸暗，我不再磨蹭，看能否找到綫索，省卻逗留此地的時間：「不好意思喔，大叔！請問黃XX女士住在這裡嗎？」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lIOVcd3pM
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpcdR6fZCZf
大叔的腳步突兀地戛然而止。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpU559IPu7P
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5992Jv9a6N
是我的提問過於唐突嗎？368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPPvWS3lvZq
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsvhfqlGkn
大叔回頭仔細打量我，神色疑惑，似乎在猜測我和黃女士的關係。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNYk40jDpL6
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9gJuvzOIOy
「有人託我將信件親手轉交予黃女士。」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF1Z8mBZHv8
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoBhDp0T0Vz
「黃女士已離開這裡好一段時間，不知何時會回來……甚或是不知會否回來。」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlWAjnXhsD
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMr71jOqN6I
「她有透露去處嗎？」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDvOaojXloH
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIEpceBA7ka
「沒有……我帶你去她昔日的房間試找綫索。」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLUk6xjSbRN
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofeaGs66uF
大叔再次邁步，步履沒有之前的輕，重若銀鉛。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGILUMqr6n
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLbXKObxs5l
陰冷的空氣，空洞的房間，慘白的牆身，最基本的傢俬和雜物。沒有生活的氣息。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNucEkMKwSV
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRpJr9WOmud
「剛才在門外碰見你，也還真令我驚訝。」大叔沒有進入房間，逕自在門外呢呢喃喃。「竹寺曾香火鼎盛。後來毗鄰的兩個小鎮分別新建更大更金碧輝煌的寺廟，無意間將信眾分流開去，到來竹寺掛單的僧侶亦逐漸減少，住持最終徇眾要求到另一寺廟主持大局。他指派我長駐於此，打掃清潔，說要方便途經的旅客。我一直覺得他想多了，豈料今天就遇見你。」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡucVG8yJm40
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrfEp4uUfVl
「可能佛祖不想我白走一趟。」我話中有話，提醒侍奉佛祖的大叔不要忘記佛祖的存在，萬萬不能撒謊。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQtqRWDP0kF
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmiiCK4aCNO
「我可以明天帶你見住持。他有掛單紀錄，可能有黃女士的聯絡資料。」大叔也不是省油的燈，簡單幾句就將我逼至沒有退路的位置：「但我希望你能先對我坦白事情的前因後果。住持是個大忙人。我可不希望為他增添不必要的麻煩。」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcfonuEPlhf
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1pvDuwbvEm
我只得坦白交代。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5DKJzwPuch
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAUjZzVvM0r
我的妻子過身了。臨終前，她希望我能預留一年時間為她完成唯一的遺願：親手將遺書交予離家出走多年的生母——黃女士。事隔多年，黃女士曾在多個地方落腳。我每次根據綫索趕至時，她早已遷居。輾轉間，我追尋至竹寺……368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAMdhNSVJ4j
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUTU1FfBrJw
「距離一年限期，還剩多少日子？」大叔生起關切之情。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLbT4G6m8US
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt0gCKGcdHR
「三日。竹寺很可能是我的最後機會。」我加倍留意他的神色舉止。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyNY8iOYX1W
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt2r5uR9tp6
「不考慮延長？」大叔表現出來的的關切絕對超過一個陌生人該有的限度。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcuqbMmroCn
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwXVslVCsbj
「妻子信緣份。她認為努力過後仍沒能找到，證明彼此有緣無份，毋須強求。她還叮囑我要燒毀遺書。」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuIW4FyaE2m
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtnowrVLXfy
大叔若有所思後，講出驚人的一句：「若果一年期限屆滿時仍找不到黃女士，介意給我看看遺書嗎？」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvBD30UXaB5
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqw1BsIgKBC
「極度介意！」我心裡認定大叔有事隱瞞。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7sqMxxebUP
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgcEOkvHPY
尷尬氣氛令大叔不再多話。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YrDig0g7S
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8htD4OwkqC
晚餐後，大叔在其他地方忙著，我則留在房間對著愛妻的照片痛哭一場。哭過以後，壓力得以紓緩，但心頭卻未能添加半分澄明，混沌混濁。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNU33gKvir0
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8NjIun5HU
我離房在寺內溜達散心。逛著逛著，忽爾看見大叔彎腰對著花園中的小樹喁喁細語，臉上盡是蜜甜。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw4U7F3jqRp
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhUBIP2V1zv
我上前跟大叔打招呼。他微笑回應，和顏悅色，渾身散發著慈祥氣息，沒有白天時的隔膜。我嘗試放下戒心，開心見誠與他聊天。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzu4QdHKRGe
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlVdTmvdhrP
不知怎地，聊著聊著，話題竟牽到大叔的心事去。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRn18ufGmc
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1l6FJPa0m
「貪，使人執著於一切順情之境。嗔，使人執著於一切違情之境。痴，使人不明白真理，致使生起貪嗔。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3kLiKBgRWG
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBi2u4jeT6z
我痴愚半生，痛苦不已。到此地求法，希望住持指點迷津。但他認為我凡心未盡，要我留在這裡靜思。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4T1GNNwxu
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGBCnYGEXf
我在竹寺侍奉多年，住持依然不為所動。我以為他在敷衍我。今天遇到你，我才明白住持所言非虛：任何無關的人事物都可輕易勾起我對逝去伴侶的思念。」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3GUYBqs2LU
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvOKFhUn7aA
我終於明白初時大叔何以對我不太友善。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgB2Tsxixwq
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSlL6VthshZ
將心比心。喪妻之後，任何人事物均能勾起我和對太太的思念。我曾抱怨上天幸災樂禍，何解不讓我安靜避世。我已盡力放下身邊一切，辭掉工作，不聯絡親友，遷出愛巢，但偏偏愛妻的遺願就是要我去彌補她的畢生遺憾！我沒有一刻能放下她，因為我的分分秒秒就是為她而過。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUASb5v8Ctf
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIDPxaKgr3g
那種痛苦實非筆墨所能形容。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX8FrCl5Oej
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Py5WeQnSA
「你的妻子真聰明，給你的痛苦設下一年期限。只要你在這一年裡拼命為她圓願，往後也就了無遺憾或悔疚。我可沒那麼幸運，不知要拖著這副臭皮囊乾等到哪年哪月哪日……」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0kp2JCeISm
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwe5GYXZome
說罷，他跟我和小樹說晚安，然後揚長而去。
翌日，我翻遍整間竹寺亦找不到大叔，只在他的房間找到他留給我的手繪地圖。我跟著地圖的指示走了大半天，來到住持現處的寺廟。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmO84DlTzls
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6xBidl2Zjx
住持聽罷我的經歷後，不禁黯然慨嘆：「黃女士始終凡心未盡……」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfHwLLXfpl
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLpP1mhOXrC
黃女士當年拋夫棄女，與情夫私奔。豈料甜蜜日子不長久，情夫患急病逝世。黃女士大受打擊，認為是自己作孽甚深，連累情夫。她來到竹寺，望住持能指點迷津。住持認為她深陷激動情緒當中，容易作出錯誤選擇，逐要她在竹寺靜思己過。可惜她半夜逃離。當黃女士重臨竹寺時，她已花光積蓄在黑市做手術整容及變性，以情夫的外表現身……368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOIVnASQP17
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEInjJVpvWq
「大叔就是黃女士？」我不禁驚呼。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEynVcXKNXV
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFhDCrtdF75
震驚之情瞬間即逝，取而代之的是說不出的矛盾。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE3roMfgnuO
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxwAwTpHyXO
這個人，我恨不來，亦原諒不了。
翌日，我和住持往竹寺走一趟。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqPSupvH2Kt
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrdNAP4N55P
寺前，我倆不約而同抬頭望向匾額。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVj3hECMJ97
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1CiViNXRvI
「你知道『竹寺』何以得名嗎？」住持問。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT5hl9znB2n
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ40vs267mVY
「等？」我的猜想有如初來之時。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfSsfZ8TFe4
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3Nnd2nuTA
「這名字只不過是客觀描述寺廟本身。」住持揚手指向全竹結構的寺廟：「大家實在想多了，對自己的想像投放情感，賦予它過多的意義，致使看不見眼前真象。」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5CJBGgTyAd
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kUx1mM03n
我驀地憶起大叔前夜的說話。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkTI2Anfrvf
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwXF43OVz3n
住持直接走往花園。不出他所料，小樹已被連根拔起，樹下土地被挖出一個大坑，足以容納一個成人。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkj7lMBq4Hf
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPxXlzauIQN
我心頭一涼，頓時明白那是甚麼一回事：多年以來，情夫的屍首一直埋在這裡。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvO5WRGeoUJ
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8OLld3dUde
我鼻頭一酸，淚如雨下。368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHIEen8mSAL
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9llqBXaytQ
「『強逼自己放下執著』也是一種執著。」368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgUVIHiaJqB
368Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAc26Njxrr
住持淡然望天，開始為一切生者亡者誦經。
