[FANFIC - HBD, KARIN!] PÉRIODICITÉ (SK)
Title: périodicité464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKT8Jn1Neje
By: Kanae (Goth-Punk88 @ ff.net)464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgilcBnv66e
Rating: K+464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxLXEuj0rrI
Word Count: 2.817464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmDJ18b03C
Author's Notes: Made for our "Karin's birthday week" over at the Ice&Spice FC @ NF ♥ I... don't even know what this is, or where it came from, and it's possibly one of the cheesiest pieces I've written for SK. But I kind of regret nothing lol - Oh and that novice drawing at the top of the fic? yup, mines. guilty as charged orz464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpFBi0myRN
Summary: June 20 has never been an ordinary day for one Uzumaki Karin.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd02CTvK8ul
périodicité (periodicity)464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzi8VpN60un
"recurrence at regular intervals of time."
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périodicité;464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTFLoF5tPa4
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by Kanae
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“Don’t look so down, darling. This is a great chance for you.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGttZQJ5m1k
“…Yeah… a great chance to make a fool of myself, you mean.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv4cfABujgy
A twinkling laugh, a delicate hand warmly lands over a girl’s head and—
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At twelve, there aren’t many things that Karin has done or that she wishes to do. She is just an ordinary girl from an ordinary family living in an ordinary village; there is nothing special about her, nothing out of the norm, nothing that makes her stand out—if one ignores her flagrant red hair, that is.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXajO2I9o2f
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But that is just what her father seems to have wanted to do all along.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ2ToUFvBBb
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You’re going out? Don’t forget to put your hood on, Karin, he would say, whenever Karin had to wander away from the immediate realms of their home. Why, papa? She used to ask when she was no more than a little girl; but that was a habit that slowly but surely withered and died as she began to grow up—as she started to grow aware enough to notice the wary air her father’s kind, wise red eyes acquired as the reminder left his lips.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy6xiXllQ91
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As she grew older, Karin learned to recognize it for what it truly was: more a warning than a piece of advice; and she began to grow more jittery as result, more worn at the seams.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk3KEQk5tur
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Her red hair was her only outstanding trait, the only thing that made her different—without it, Karin may as well fade into the scenery.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡasNjCK1nsB
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She may as well not exist.
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—and ruffles her hair.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUQgeB70ht
“Now, now, don’t be like that. I have a good feeling about this, you know?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5XrpkPlewL
“…What do you mean, mama?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAg22gpO5Tl
A secretive smile highlighted by—
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At thirteen, Karin nearly dies.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡArpikIcQla
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And then she is saved—saved by a striking boy with a rich voice and eyes that warm her up to the core the moment he smiles—at her, for her—and suddenly, Karin does not feel so ordinary anymore.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8nTVQ49JEa
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There is something different about you, her mother tells her once with a knowing smile, ever since you came back from Konoha.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8tpgj26aW7
Karin jumps in her seat, awkward denial bubbling up in her throat and evaporating the moment her mother laughs, I like it. You look prettier, Karin.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4y1M8Mi8YJ
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She does not know about that—can’t see any difference as she looks at herself in the mirror, self-consciously pulling on some strands of red hair and squinting at her reflection.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2dJL4g3XNS
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What she does know, though—what she can’t forget, is—464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvoGe0huKhX
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See ya, he had said, and it takes Karin a surprising amount of time to realize that, for the first time since she could remember, there was something she wanted.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyDzFtS6Wdk
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Wanted for herself; not for her parents, not for those she cares about. Something that was completely hers, in all its staggering intensity and youthful hope.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUd1P5zcQGz
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See ya, he had said, and until then Karin had never quite known how good it felt to feel alive.
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—by amber eyes that seem to spark.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs03b3iTYAe
“Ara~ I wonder if I should tell you. It is a safely guarded secret, you see.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIJwAfKVzfI
“I will keep it! I promise, I won’t tell anybody, mama!”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDAmNUznlw3
A chuckle, “Alright, alright! Since you insist, I'll tell you. It—”
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At fourteen, Karin breathes her last breath.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9bg4qUp1ws
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There is no blood—not hers—involved, nor are there any wounds—not physical ones—or any white walls or tunnels and gates of light—no light, only dark—only smoke—only the smell of burnt flesh and intest—464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwQBtCGnOOy
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There is, however, anguish. An agony so great that Karin bit her lip until it bled, fisted her palms until her nails left permanent crescent-moon shaped scars in the contours of her skin, new batches added to already cracked life lines.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2k3Gt8Rpd
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There are silent, chocked sobs that made her throat burn and her sight blur until she has ran out of tears.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK33s6e9opU
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And there is also horror; a burning, paralyzing sort of horror that reaches its peak and fades into a mute but perpetual tune stringing the chords of her being as she comes back and stares at the corpses of her father and mother, unrecognizable masses of ashes retching of burnt blood and bodily fluids that make a pile of vile crawl its way up to her tongue.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj3SR7BTJmA
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And then, there is he—sidestepping the man with ominous dark chakra and extending a hand towards her, onyx eyes boring into her own with the same might with which the understanding in his chakra drove her horror away.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLzx8bb1S2W
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You staying here will amount to nothing, but you leaving just might, he says. Come, Karin, he calls.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMYq8x4Mmxh
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She takes his hand, and there is hope.
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“—It is said that one too many women in our family have found their fate in the lands of Konohagakure.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE6o9PVGcCV
“Their… fate?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ663op7srZ0
Her voice curls up around the edges, as if it were a spell.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0vtr9B2RCT
“You will understand in—”
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At fifteen, Karin has shed her skin.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡySuvbPSS8i
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There are now sharp edges where there used to be soft contours; angry frowns where there used to be kindness, smirks where there used to be smiles; buoyancy where there once was shame, barriers in what once were vast landscapes—and there are also scars.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvGZ6J7bQ2F
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Tell-tale scars of the Karin she used to be and new, revolting ones from the Karin she has become. She hides the latter and denies the former; pretends they’re long gone, never aching, never hurting anymore.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPlyFFtGvFQ
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Yet, he sees them all. As if she wore them on her sleeve.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnSvFqweIzK
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“Say, Sasuke, since we’re alone how about we—”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOvjDtJgy0K
“I have to leave soon, Karin.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJaL6CY7Exi
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She puts her glasses back on and crosses her arms with a frown, moving away from him. “Why did you even bother coming, then?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdnErgvWZcu
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Sasuke says nothing, then. He says nothing, and Karin straightens, her back suddenly assaulted by gooseflesh; could he—?464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVVRdajYylv
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Could he have possibly known? Known how before his unexpected arrival, Karin had been hounded by her memories. Seeing familiar faces in the nameless prisoners of the base, ghosts come back to haunt her and pull her down with them to the depths of hell—a hell made of nothing but flames and guilt of mistakes she is not sure she would take back, even if she could.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvzvhSwi9GS
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“…I had business here, is all.” His voice reaches out to her through the haze of her thoughts, pulling her back with nonchalant words that seemed devoid of any meaning.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLNyraBTnTl
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But as she turns and her eyes meet his, Karin sees.
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“—in due time, Karin.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1kf0eNEKd
“Still, mama… it just isn’t fair.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbUpauIumzs
“What isn’t, dear?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC8IADBYxC4
“… I wanted to spend my birthday with you and papa.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFur9xo5Fv5
Her smile—
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At sixteen, Karin falls.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZ2GctHAQB
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She falls from a great, great height at appalling speed; she hasn’t even had time to acknowledge the abysm before she has hit rock bottom, her goals and dreams spilling through her open chest and pooling on the ground alongside everything she knows.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpCxFAqvhxy
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Alongside everything she once held dear. Everyone she relied on. The one she trusted.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs4pfFrmtGD
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Now, there was no one left.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxsCFyPfoVR
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No one left but the roaming, empty carcass of the boy she once loved; the boy who taught her what it felt like to be alive, the boy who gave her hope and helped her find meaning back when she had lost her way, the boy who helped her to be reborn from her ashes into someone better; someone stronger, someone capable of standing up for herself and for him, too. The boy who flared her will and her drive with a single touch, with a single look, with the simplest of words—464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS29Imrcl4l
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I need you464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9oa0sslGps
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“So much for that,” Karin mutters to no one, her back pressed against the cold walls of a cell and her fingers absentmindedly tracing the ghost of the wound that had taken her heart out for good.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXq0gQaYnXd
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And then it comes. An almost unnoticeable flicker—too subtle to be perceived, but too longed for to be ignored.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2LTVXAtYp
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No… I’ve had enough, Sasuke but her withered heart is trying to beat again, and it makes up her mind for her.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzjbQYom0gd
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“…So much for this,” Karin murmurs to herself—and then she is on her feet again, her inner eye tracing his every move.
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—melts.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVMdHqkQjYu
“Cheer up, love. There will be many birthdays left for us to celebrate together.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡggGzlPlBcO
“… You promise?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bjsJjH2H1
Her gaze softens.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4G4jaAWs8s
“I promise.”
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At seventeen, Karin kisses him.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjc65YQpix
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She impulsively crashes her lips against his, her arms thrown around his neck in a desperate attempt to hold onto him—to anchor him down before his essence could have the chance to fade into pitch black darkness again, to feel him before he could have the chance to waste his life—her life, their future—chasing phantoms all the way to the death.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5k0GK5aFpf
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When the impromptu kiss ends, Karin sees him—the him she knows, the him she loves—flickering across his eyes for the briefest of moments, and she hears her name resounding in her ears even though he has not uttered a single sound.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZpGPHuhysU
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She smiles ruefully; trembling eyes boring into his—and then wordlessly lets him go.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN5UnKD3eAt
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She has given him a reason, but the choice is his to make.
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“Ha, so it was about a boy, I knew it!”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6VRulZqkAs
“Shh, mama! I don’t want papa to hear! And… it’s not like I’m ever going to see him again, anyway….”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKYxGDKzR4
Her mother has to hide her smile, “Actually, Karin… something tells me you just might.”
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At eighteen, Sasuke kisses her back.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50w3QcZlWR
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It is not nearly as passionate as her—their—first kiss had been; there is no desperation, no adrenaline—but there is craving all the same, waving through the serenity threading over her through the gentle pressure of his fingertips over the nape of her neck, enveloping her like a makeshift cloak and warming her down to her very core.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6Ka4TgoZz
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And Karin feels her very essence quiver under it—under the warmth and the way her heart seemed to want to leave her and jump into him instead, to claim the home it has always longed for; the home it has always fought for.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxHkMk15oyu
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The home it belonged to.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVp40nhKazU
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As he kisses her, sunrays clumsily dancing upon her lips, Karin feels like she would vaporize into him if Sasuke were to take a single breath.
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“How do you know?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjj5tfWnlWY
“Because, that’s how fate works, Karin.”
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At nineteen, Karin smiles.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrGOU7dckgT
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“Itachi,” she says, and Sasuke looks up to her, startled. “The name… Itachi. That’s what you wanted, isn’t it?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvYIW7Q2W5Q
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Sasuke parts his lips—once, twice—but no sound comes out and soon enough he gives up altogether, lowering his eyes to stare at the bundle in his arms. It stares back at him, impossibly red eyes widened with innocent curiosity, pink tongue sticking out from underneath rosy lips.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡELDNRZsX8T
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“Are you sure, Karin?” he whispers after what seemed like an eternity, and Karin’s smile only widens.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3cI19ptEQK
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“Yeah.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFWc1A1pw6N
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And as she sees them—as she sees Sasuke hold their baby as if he were holding the whole, wide world in the crook of his arms—Karin remembers her mother with such vivid clarity that she catches a breath of her perfume. The memory—the vision is bittersweet, and it makes Karin’s throat clog, because she recognizes that look.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGHU8yVBJQ9
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It was the way her mother used to look at her father and her, eyes brimming with love and pride, unspoken but ever-present, never changing. Karin had not been able to understand it, then—464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyBV9dDIIvB
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But she did, now. And the understanding squeezed her heart in a way that was both, wonderful and terrible. To think it took her this long to finally understand, once and for all, what it all meant.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡifVcVaTW3c
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To understand who her mother truly was, what her mother felt, what her mother desired for her—and how her mother hurt.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt5QovXunfI
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You’re special, Karin. She would tell her sometimes, her eyes half-lidded and afflicted by thoughts she would never get the chance to say aloud. One day, you will realize that.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBrHaG1bhMV
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She realized it, now; what it meant to love to her roots, what it meant to be a woman.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFjOamkx24q
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An Uzumaki woman.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2SoZSMbzSa
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“… Thank you, Karin.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsauy7flpo6
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“Idiot,” she shakes her head, weakly, traitorous tears prickling at the corners of her eyes and threatening to spill. “That... should be my line.”
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“They will be here soon,”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2omDlwFZN
“Who will be here soon, mama?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK7dJmuyGui
“It could be anyone,” she finally replies, and her hold is steady as she combs through Karin’s hair, “we have long since lost any care for their identities, Karin. What matters is… what their presence means.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLqFg0v36Z3
“And what is that?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg8WcCSZHRf
Her silence provides the only answer; and Karin wishes it weren’t enough.
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At twenty, Karin celebrates her birthday for the first time in seven years.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuIJlcS4r7n
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And it starts with a soft but firm admittance whispered as she caresses the baby’s nose, all too aware of the pleasant weight of Sasuke’s gaze, of the feelings swirling in his chakra.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHvenpTvGSa
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Hearing them is unexpected, however—and her widened eyes snap to his only to find his lips beginning to curve, his own hand coming to caress her cheek in much the same way she was doing to their son.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRUAlvh1wq7
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“W—what was that about?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlYwO1cL2Gn
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She asks; some habits are hard to break, and her awkward way of fighting down her embarrassment seemed to be as persistent as ever.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwJpbItvZK4
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Sasuke doesn’t seem to mind, though. If anything, his smile seems to morph into an amused smirk as he shrugs, noncommittally. “I just felt like saying it, is all.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxe8Tv4t521
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“Dumbass,” she mutters, hoping the darkness will hide the way her cheeks have warmed up like bonfires, so reminiscent of her prepubescent days when all she could do was a dream she would one day lay with Sasuke the way she does now. “...You didn't need to.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRC9dtBvGwQ
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“I know, Karin,” and this time he is positively smiling, suddenly mutating back into the Sasuke that had stolen her heart so many years ago. “But it still felt good to say it.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb7X1p4obio
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Karin says nothing in response; simply snuggles closer to him, eyes on the baby as he opens his eyes and blinks, his little hands curling and uncurling up into the air.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqraFKTizy
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“He is going to be strong,” Sasuke assesses, and Karin would have mocked him by how ridiculous it was that he sounds that proud of Itachi when the baby hasn’t even said his first word yet, weren’t it because she felt the same way.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMgjmVDfCkp
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He was going to be strong. A little piece of herself and Sasuke—a memento of those who had given their life up for them; a torch for those who had granted them the chance to live this moment.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrtSQks3mc
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To live this happiness.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwXg7G8TZya
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“Happy birthday, Itachi,” she whispers, and squeezes Sasuke’s hand. “I love you.”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ6cWCKYU3h
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The words feel dusty, and unknown—but familiar.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcquZxq3eui
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She knew them, once.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVaLZDUg6JX
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She has known them all along.
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I'm sorry, Karin.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA5diwSDjfx
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Were the last words her mother told her before her father ushered her out of the house and prompted her to run—run as far as she could, away from them—and forced her to leave them to die.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaCAH5ogHcn
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To survive.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTIHzVmFWJ
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Those words used to hunt Karin down in those nights when sleep refused to lend her its hand, the eerie walls of Orochimaru’s hideout caving in on her and Sasuke’s steady chakra being her only relief, her only shield.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡob3TuDL490
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Yet, what haunted her weren’t the words themselves, but their meaning; Karin had instinctively known then, just as clear as she knows now, that her mother was not apologizing for forcing her to forsake them and live on.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH33I9eELQU
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No, that was not it—that was not the kind of woman her mother had been.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsvK4tk2kW9
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Instead, she had apologized for something else entirely.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ZNToI4oaM
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For the unsaid.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC4Wymn5m9V
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“What are you thinking about, Karin?”464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF43OyWCqW1
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Her lips curl upward as he takes the seat by her side, repentances fading away into the evening sky.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8eu2IeHBy5
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“Nothing,” she replies, threading her fingers through his and gazing back to their children, who were laughing and running together through the backyard, a lively mixture of reds and blacks; the Uchiha and Uzumaki crests proudly etched on their backs, on their hearts.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs142LyyxBk
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“Nothing at all.”
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"You will be fine."464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQfWxq7ZDY6
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And through the tears and the pain and the loneliness and the longing and the hardships and the fear, Karin should have known better.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIDshoFCJbP
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Her mother was always right.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡymOJcqMjUa
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end.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVRqifwtVGn
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I... seriously don't know where all this came from; my best guess: Uzumaki feelings. Uzumaki feelings everywhere. lol, I tried to play with the different facets of Karin, and how she grows into each one of them; plus SK, of course.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSRDUB4oQ06
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The stuff I wrote here is not quite how I see things going, though; to do that I would have had to write about 395749574 vignettes per year, rather than only one lol so I went for rushed versions of a couple of scenarios I had thought about.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2B3PudZBmh
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Oh and while I did not state it in the fic: every vignette takes place on Karin's birthday, so the baby was born on June 20, too.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg94kGA3Y6X
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Anyway, hopefully, it wasn't that terrible! ♥464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcB2VMsgkg5
tags: fanfic, karin, naruto, sasukarin, sasuke
i'm : 
cheerful
listening to: never let me go - florence + the machine
ns52.14.228.67da2
