A few weeks later, Homer rang Strudel's doorbell.
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"Hey, Homer" said Strudel. "What's up?"
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"Strudel, I have a question" said Homer.
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"Ok, go ahead" Strudel said, letting Homer inside.
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"Ok" said Homer. "I know you probably had sex with Pixie when you were going out"
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"Actually, no" said Strudel. "Not real sex, we just fooled around. But I HAVE had real sex before, just not with Pixie"
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"With Pancake?" Homer asked.
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Strudel nodded. "But don't tell her I told you, she already hates me enough as it is"
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"Ok, I won't" said Homer. "But how do you ask a girl if she wants to do it?"
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"Are you talking about Monkey?" Strudel asked.
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"Yeah" Homer blushed.
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"Are you guys both virgins?"
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"I'm pretty sure that she is"
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"Are you?"
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"Yeah" said Homer.
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"You need to make sure that you're both ready" said Strudel.
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"I know I am" said Homer. "But we can't do it at her house, because her parents are always home"
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"Ok, here's the deal" said Strudel. "Next Friday, I'll invite CJ to come over here. You just need to get Pancake out of the house"
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"Ok, I'll invite Monkey over then" said Homer.
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"Make sure you have protection" said Strudel.
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"I do" said Homer. "I can't wait until next Friday!"
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On Friday, Strawberry, Montana, Pancake, Kiwi, and Carlotta were having a 5way conversation on the phone.
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"I am seriously going to kill myself" Strawberry said.
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"Why, what happened?" Pancake asked.
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"Chester broke up with me" Strawberry sobbed.
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"Oh my God, why?" Pancake asked.
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"Because he's a dumbass" Carlotta said. "Strawberry, any guy that breaks up with you is a dumbass"
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"I still like him" Strawberry sniffed.
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"Strawberry, you'll find someone else" said Kiwi.
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"I don't want anyone else"
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"It's not that bad being single" Carlotta said.
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"How would you know?" asked Strawberry. "You've been with Honky for like, ever"
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"Strawberry, I'm single" said Montana. "It's not that bad, I promise"
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"It is" said Strawberry.
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"You weren't even together that long" said Carlotta.
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"So what?" said Strawberry. "I liked him for a long time.. I even liked him when I was with Frosty"
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"Why didn't you say anything?" asked Montana.
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"I don't know" Strawberry sniffed.
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"You'll be fine" said Kiwi. "You'll find someone else"
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"I don't want anyone else!" Strawberry repeated.
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"You will eventually" said Pancake.
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"Strawberry, we both got over Muffins" said Kiwi.
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"Speak for yourself" Strawberry said. "I'm better off dead. I'm going to bed. Goodnight."
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"It's only 6:45" said Carlotta.
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"Bye" Strawberry hung up.
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Meanwhile, on the phone, Montana was saying "She's not gonna kill herself"
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"Yeah, he's not worth it" said Carlotta.
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"She's tried it before," said Kiwi. "What if she tries it again?"
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"True" said Pancake. "I'll try calling her back in a little bit"
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Meanwhile, Strawberry had just finished an entire bottle of Jaeger Meister. She took a few pills, went up to her room, crying hysterically, turned her ipod on full blast, and took out her knife that she kept in her drawer.
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