
hewo~! okay, anyways. idk what i'm doing but have fun reading, i guess.
1. recall your most embarrassing memory530Please respect copyright.PENANAKblxDAxEgo
okay. welp, this is going to be weird to write about. okay, so, i was in 5th grade and i had the audacity to sign up for the talent show. so, i signed up and i went to rehearsal, right? i cried in front everyone at rehearsal. then the next night, we had a night where all the kids in the talent show performed in front everyone's parents. what did i do? i cried. again. then the next day, we peformed again but it was in front of the entire school, including my crush. mind you, i was wearing this ugly dress and i thought i was cute. then we were back in that era where we thought the orange justice dance was the shit. so, muy friend was shy and she was dancing so i went out onto the stage with her and danced sicne for some reason, i knew the entire dance to the entire song..? then my turn came and i had to put the ugly dress on, i went on stage and started to sing rise up by andra day and what did i do, once again? i fucking cried. yep. in front of my crush and everything. life sucks, mate.
2. think about the last time that you laughed until you cried. 530Please respect copyright.PENANAGfmXPD3cfg
that had to be like yesterday. i think i laughed at something bunny said and then started crying because it was so funny. maybe it wasn't yesterday but it was damn near last week or something. eh, idgaf.
3. write a story about what would happen if your day went in reverse. hint: the story would begin when you were in your pajamas and ready for bed.530Please respect copyright.PENANAkveHFAHjf3
*acting like a vlogger on youtube from 2016* hi, guys. so, i'm in bed right now. i can't get back up for a few more hours because of my schedule. *a few hours earlier..?* okay, hi. i'm in the bathroom right now taking my clothes off and using the shower. *after shower* i'm putting my clothes back on now. hold on, ms. shi! i'm getting undressed. --- omfg, i can't do this. it's too weird.
5. what was the best joke that you heard during the last week? what made that joke so funny to you?530Please respect copyright.PENANAmKBASkKiEV
the funniest joke to me in the past week was said on saturday when we were at barnes & noble. lovely, bunny and i were sitting in the little kids section, reading when out of no where lovely said, 'are you eleven protons because you're sodium fine.' and i stared at her. then i realized what she said and i started cackling.
6. make a list of your favorite puns.530Please respect copyright.PENANARBO3r2GNbz
i might seem lame right now but i don't pay attention to puns...
7. write a movie review about the funniest movie that you have ever seen.530Please respect copyright.PENANAA9klt4xLm7
*acting like a famous journalist* hello, my name is alex ugliana. today i am going to write a movie review about the movie- i give up. i'm not good at explaining things without spoiling it.
8. pretend that you are going to be performing a stand-up comedy act for your friends and family members. write a draft of what your act might sound like.530Please respect copyright.PENANAF9wkz6j7FG
hehe, okay. *clears throat and gets accent ready* *using "country" accent* hey there, y'all! my name is alex and i'm here tahday tah tell yeh fellers about the trump family! i believe thet man, donald trump, was a good president. and that's not jest becuz i'm caucasian and african amurican. i swear tah yer, he was a good man in my eyes. omfg, i give up. wtf am i writing? *yeets self into dumpster*
9. consider something that you are most scared of, and then write a story about a character encountering that fear. make sure the character has a reaction to their fear that is so exaggerated it becomes funny.530Please respect copyright.PENANAifSXREALUM
okay, lemme try this. i'm scared of the dark. lemma alone. omg. anyways-- genevieve walked into her home late at night. "i knew i shouldn't have gone to that stupid 'get together'." she groans --bitch wtf--. her house was pitch black. she couldn't see anything as she took off her shoes. she tried to flip on a light switch. it didn't work. she tried over and over again. "holy fuck, did i pay the light bill?" she said --shoulda never sucked dick for free, genevieve. omg, i'm going to hell-- she digs in her pocket for her phone. she turned on the flashlight. she walked through her house, heart beating like crazy, mind running at what could've caused her lights not to work. she walks past the couch and the corner of the couch grazes her thigh. she screams bloody murder. "oh my fucking god!" she screams and runs through her house like a little bitch. she runs into the kitchen counter. "ouch!" she yells. she goes for another light switch. it doesn't work either. she screams even louder. she runs to her room and flips on the light. she breathes a heavy sigh, seeing the darkness disappear from the light. --you know what? i declare gore!-- then a blade stabs into her neck. she gasps and chokes up blood, holding her neck. she bleeds all over her carpets. thoughts are running through her mind. am i dying? eh, i don't care. oh my fucking god! there is blood on my carpets! wait- who stabbed me? she turns around and there is the dark behind her. she falls to the ground and dies. you know, i liked where that went. morbid as fuck but who gives a shit. i liked it. i'm weird. anyways-- NEXT~!
10. how would you describe your own sense of humor?530Please respect copyright.PENANAc6lKlD3HqM
i would descibe my sense of humor to be kind of morbid, kind of crazy, not really that funny but somehow funny to other people. i think i'm a crackhead that doesn't do crack....make sense? yeah? okay, bye.
11. write a list of funny excuses that you could use to get out of doing your homework.530Please respect copyright.PENANACtu5vD2Ywi
okay, bet. number one - so what had happened was, i didn't really know what to do so i gave it to my mom and she got angry with it so she gave it back to me and told me to get the fuck out of her room so i went to the mall and got on the airplane and drove to japan and then i biked to south korea over the sea and i dropped it on my way to south korea. so it's in the ocean between japan and south korea. i mean, feel free to look in the ocean. i hope you don't drown. *silently wishing for them to drown* *smiles all inocently* number two - my pet dragon at it. number three - i got free tickets to a bts concert with backstage tickets and i needed the paper to make a poster for bts. number four - i cried and got it all wet and then my little brother got hungry so i fed my brother my homework for dinner because i was depression and did not feel like cooking. number five - wait- we had homework? oh my god, was that what i used to pick up my unicorn's shit? i'm so sorry! number six - i lost it in zamunda. you don't know what zamunda is? oh my god, it's in africa. what type of social studies teacher are you? what the fuck do you mean, 'why was i in zamunda'? i was studying, idiot. number seven - i was sick and i used the paper as toilet paper. don't ask me what sickness i had, you icky nasty, oh my god! you disgust me. okay, lemme stop.
12. write a funny short story in which the main character is your alter ego/you.530Please respect copyright.PENANAmhjJGX2ddd
funny? mm. i'll see if i can do it. so first here is my ego or aura, whatever. i'm nice, sweet, funny, "pretty", adorable, friendly, sometimes ghetto especially when i'm mad and i seem very social but i really don't like people. so, my alter ego would be someone who absolutely the opposite except for the fact that i'd still be funny and ghetto. story (btw this'll be like when i first moved here so jazzy won't be in this): i walk down the stairs of my new group home. all the heads turn towards me. the staff, bunny, gorgeous and kitkat. they all look at me, wide-eyed. i sigh, heavily and walk towards them, not wanting to get to know them. "hi." gorgeous says. "wassup." i say, sliding my hoodie on. omg, i give up. i can't do this lmao.
13. have you ever tried to use your own sense of humor to impress someone? write about whether or not your jokes worked their magic.530Please respect copyright.PENANAdZp5glugdP
i mean, yeah, mate. how do you think i have emmi? she likes me because i'm pretty, funny, loud/energetic, and i kind of don't care what people think about me.
14. think about an inside joke that you share with a friend or family member. how did that inside joke come to be? 530Please respect copyright.PENANAmUBvSfbmmD
bet~! me and bunny were just doing it. free real estate. i walked up to her one day and slid my hand down her arm and said that in a weird/seductive way and ever since then, it's been a thing. we were just trying to explain it to her boyfriend, lion. and yesterday, we were watching a movie and the thingy said in a british accent, 'and i'm greedy with the soup.' so now, that's a thing. we have too many inside jokes. i make too many jokes.
~~
i guess i'm doing those question things again. emmi looks sexy today, holy shet. anyways--
~~
full name? - lady leilani waterton of dogde charger.530Please respect copyright.PENANAdwxbAs6oT4
girl bestie? - coco <3530Please respect copyright.PENANAfMqTN97NLR
boy bestie? - idek anymore. i need a boy bestie.530Please respect copyright.PENANA02gxUWWk6Z
age? - seven years old.530Please respect copyright.PENANALN28aw7b3J
last person i texted? - idfk.530Please respect copyright.PENANAT0uq3fhYFn
last person i called? - probably my little brother.530Please respect copyright.PENANA0INoyQ2Ema
current crush? - my girlfriend, emmi, tf?530Please respect copyright.PENANAhl8vYg5CQG
random fact? - i like food.530Please respect copyright.PENANAtqqJvWOC7o
single or taken? - big, fat taken.530Please respect copyright.PENANACqoaTqTWFa
favourite quote? - if it delicious, it's zero calories. said by wwh.530Please respect copyright.PENANAaPvTUFM89g
first kiss? - bitch wtf?530Please respect copyright.PENANAwVGs4SnXHr
ever smoked? - nope.530Please respect copyright.PENANAccOwfMQlTj
ever done drugs? - nope~530Please respect copyright.PENANA1t60uYXtyp
ever been drunk? - i don't drink.530Please respect copyright.PENANAm8l5DmEibg
longest relationship? - five and a half months.530Please respect copyright.PENANAvYlMj1CP35
pet peeve? - my little brother. his entire existent. but i still love him.530Please respect copyright.PENANAU7UzHthe2K
eye colour? - brown. my little brother's eyes are really pretty.530Please respect copyright.PENANAuwl0Mks2mP
birthday? - 1930.01.01-- nah, i'm playing but no one needs to know my birthday.530Please respect copyright.PENANAboD0jPNFrx
obsession? - kpop.530Please respect copyright.PENANAzIwSwzCxaN
do you give second chances? - that depends.530Please respect copyright.PENANAGkCl80WKK1
play any sports? - no, bitch. the hell do i look like?530Please respect copyright.PENANAYc1b9SliJo
dream job? - kpop idol or just a singer in general.530Please respect copyright.PENANAoAisf2o8N4
day or night? - idk.530Please respect copyright.PENANA6fJHrJtEoL
your idea of a perfec date? - idk.530Please respect copyright.PENANA9RNpVLtWUo
sing in the shower? - yes, motherfucker. i throw whole ass concerts in the shower.530Please respect copyright.PENANAAX3nP1ZMCH
favourite colour(s)? - purple and black.530Please respect copyright.PENANAjV90xLauTi
any tattoos? - nope. i'm lame.530Please respect copyright.PENANAccoBqyR3jO
any peircings? - yes, in my ears.530Please respect copyright.PENANA3HDURVOctn
favourite movie(s)? - idk.530Please respect copyright.PENANAh3LnkVGLKF
current mood? - bored and tired.530Please respect copyright.PENANAs56AbXzdSF
jealous of? - a lot of things.530Please respect copyright.PENANAii7QYipeWr
place you want to visit? - south korea and cambodia.530Please respect copyright.PENANANiHJwWsne9
pets? - two dogs.530Please respect copyright.PENANAExCo22otjB
last song you listened to? - spring day and currently listening to crystal snow and trying not to cry. so far succesful in not crying and the song is ending.530Please respect copyright.PENANAaqUYpzcRfS
favourite number? - seven.530Please respect copyright.PENANAcIKbrgW232
nicknames? - vanilla, alex, suga, steph.530Please respect copyright.PENANAi7y7ufyLCv
siblings? - 5 older sisters and 2 brothers.530Please respect copyright.PENANATKudtruu0n
afraid of the dark? - yes.530Please respect copyright.PENANAc8gW2H54dI
one wish? - to be happy for real.530Please respect copyright.PENANANbYy2UOEhM
something you want to do!? - live life. vibe, you know?530Please respect copyright.PENANAHbXcW2ru2Y
~530Please respect copyright.PENANA3Z8V7W1ZIA
full name? - mind your fucking business, damn.530Please respect copyright.PENANA95LEtrWssp
age? - i'm still seven years old.530Please respect copyright.PENANAgKVOWQ3aVV
idols? - bts, stray kids, blackpink, kamla harris, etc.530Please respect copyright.PENANAElxXRTTfA5
something you hate about yourself? - my body.530Please respect copyright.PENANAgXH947emAb
something you like about yourself? - idk.530Please respect copyright.PENANA0PVwEoE0oI
someone you hate? - jason derulo and donald trump.530Please respect copyright.PENANAJ4ddx8WEAQ
favourite band? - bts.530Please respect copyright.PENANAlg7wmNtGU1
say 'sexy' what do you think of? - that time when stray kids was still nine members and they were roleplaying. felix was a grand father and he has this old man voice and it was still sexy but funny. but that's not it. he said sexy instead of saekshi, i guess and woojin corrected him and felix kept saying saekshi over and over. oh, i also think of bts and just-- agh!530Please respect copyright.PENANAGTrck7CyKy
ever had a boyfriend/girlfriend? - no, of course not.530Please respect copyright.PENANAnVmIS0WPhB
where do you want to be right now? - idk. south korea.530Please respect copyright.PENANAZik3vYaCcA
girl crush? - emmi.530Please respect copyright.PENANAPLIS2OfQOk
boy crush? - bts. plural, bitch.530Please respect copyright.PENANAsRjrjl6gWI
an embarrassing memory? - look at this top ^530Please respect copyright.PENANA8p0hA6uhdb
talents? - singing.530Please respect copyright.PENANAfarfNazlNZ
soemone i miss? - my step-mom.530Please respect copyright.PENANAZzjpLzLYO2
someone i love? - emmi.530Please respect copyright.PENANA2uoPJoYeBD
my future goals? - idk. graduate school. succeed in life, i guess.530Please respect copyright.PENANAXM7cWdEDze
a confession? - i am not ninety-one years old.530Please respect copyright.PENANAPLDxt2o7bC
something i'm addicted to? - love and affection even though i don't get a lot of them. oh, also, drugs! yeah, no. i'm playing.530Please respect copyright.PENANAAz81UgfeB4
favourite animal? - dogs.530Please respect copyright.PENANAwNmEUbCXQr
favourite tv couples? - weiyoung and touba jun. minde and di. jin-wook and yu-mi. spongebob and sandy. probably more but i don't feel like going through them all. 530Please respect copyright.PENANAZdc4vgr5pB
ships? - namjin, jikook, taekook, sope.530Please respect copyright.PENANAMqxiTO9ysr
worst movie you've ever saw? - i don't remember what it was called but it was just terrible. i was so cunfused.530Please respect copyright.PENANAuUaFyTd3YN
what's your biggest wish? - to be a singer.530Please respect copyright.PENANAFDEiL5Lxoj
bad habits? - hitting people out of affection. being sarcastic.530Please respect copyright.PENANAcfijOZ0J1m
food you hate? - pineapple pizza, school luch fried chicken because that chicken be fake and disgusting. caviar. 530Please respect copyright.PENANAdyg3aj2pha
hair colour? - brown. i'm ugly as fuck so when i say i feel sexy, ignore that shit.530Please respect copyright.PENANAnlZTHmB5gv
favourite kind of ice cream? - cookies & cream and chocolate.530Please respect copyright.PENANABFgrmN8XjP
~530Please respect copyright.PENANAeBavKvPtyv
gender? - oppa attack helicopter and/or female.530Please respect copyright.PENANA3vsFpaIi81
country? - i don't live on earth. 530Please respect copyright.PENANAqWGLn6Jyhk
languages you speak? - lunarian, trigedasleng, english, tiny korean, sorta french, kinda spanish.530Please respect copyright.PENANA8YcydDi3Ua
last lie you told? - that i'm pretty.530Please respect copyright.PENANAHoCishYs0w
favourite subject in school? - english language arts.530Please respect copyright.PENANAiq11MjmSRK
most expensive item you own? - a pair of vans.530Please respect copyright.PENANAK6hk3aUzYl
country with your favourite accent? - australia.530Please respect copyright.PENANAO3cOaJv2DH
do you have any children? - i was about to answer like, bitch wtf, no. but i do. li minde, touba jun, touba yu, cheng de, li weiyoung, jun tao, bai zhi, jungkook, jennie, lisa, ni-ki, all of txt, jasper from the 100, etc. i have a lot of kids.530Please respect copyright.PENANAyzXah4oCyw
dog or cat person? - both.530Please respect copyright.PENANAOepZZM6kDR
first kiss? if so, what age? - yes. thirteen years old.530Please respect copyright.PENANA8AzIRsaXSv
do you live in a house or apartment? - nosy, i declare. i live in a house. damn.530Please respect copyright.PENANAR5KtWfR02n
do you belive in God? - idk.530Please respect copyright.PENANAi1Fwp3F7Ff
single or taken? - taken.530Please respect copyright.PENANAM0XeBL5eKu
favourite body part of the opposite gender? - well, damn. heh heh. nah, perverts. torso and hands, omg. *dies*530Please respect copyright.PENANA177IAcXO0P
birthday year? - 1930.530Please respect copyright.PENANAPqtDgba87y
celebrity crush? - holy fuck, dude. i have a lot.530Please respect copyright.PENANANICuiIJMYX
age? - what's that?530Please respect copyright.PENANAxJZKNO17aR
enthinicity? - african american.530Please respect copyright.PENANAnErlchcdCr
tea or coffee? - neither.530Please respect copyright.PENANAhOyaRWsL0D
random skill you have? - i can make people smile.530Please respect copyright.PENANATGphlhXQoZ
prefer hugs or kisses? - i mean, both. *slow motion walks looking stupid as fuck*530Please respect copyright.PENANAsDMfoZ2eVP
favourite food? - ice cream.530Please respect copyright.PENANA9ocha24MtY
last person you saw naked? - myself, you fucking icky nasty. 530Please respect copyright.PENANA4l6d9E6E4O
shared nudes? - damn, people are nosy but yes.530Please respect copyright.PENANAECJVSwJQMe
eye colour? - the rainbow. get on my level.530Please respect copyright.PENANAwQMGNFvJaW
favourite soda? - sprite.530Please respect copyright.PENANABPl3lBiIzB
biggest pet peeve? - people being people.530Please respect copyright.PENANAnFp8pDVxGd
can you swim? - yes, wtf?530Please respect copyright.PENANASgCXYl2Apq
favourite song at the moment? - 19 by stray kids but that could change every 2 seconds. honestly i don't think i have a favourite song.530Please respect copyright.PENANAt8zMsTqW0Z
do you watch porn? - no, but i have with my cousin and her friends because we wanted to see the tony lopez leaked video so we searched porn hub. one thing went to another and we ended up seeing an apparent james charles leaked sex tape and then my cousin and her friend sat there and watched a bondage for like an hour while me and her other friend decided to cleanse our eyes with bleach and protect our assholes.530Please respect copyright.PENANAUuAzqc3ggS
virgin? - yes, omg. nasty.530Please respect copyright.PENANA4CDOR7HPE7
favourite social media platform(s) - twitter, weverse, snapchat.530Please respect copyright.PENANAUZUNLokpnr
colour of your current bed sheets? - weird question but, uhm, they're grey...yep *nodding*530Please respect copyright.PENANALH8ugRJV2q
apple or andriod? - apple.530Please respect copyright.PENANAYVSIG0t67T
best dessert? - mochi.530Please respect copyright.PENANAdQqziUAMmq
~530Please respect copyright.PENANABq2CRXu7sd
have you ever:530Please respect copyright.PENANADIIJTdDAbK
1. skipped class? - yes.530Please respect copyright.PENANAyvWcJHWV3H
2. done drugs? - no.530Please respect copyright.PENANAtNGt38CdPj
3. self-harmed? - yes.530Please respect copyright.PENANA8bOkXoXncO
4. drank? - no.530Please respect copyright.PENANA6QcNXNCkH3
5. shoplifted? - yes.530Please respect copyright.PENANA1wu9uBGXRS
6. gotten a tattoo? - no.530Please respect copyright.PENANAMtdLGSf4BA
7. broken up with someone? - yes.530Please respect copyright.PENANAUeOLX1DE3g
what's your favourite:530Please respect copyright.PENANAMvpah8Nl7r
8. show? - the princess weiyoung.530Please respect copyright.PENANA7IB0Gjz6Wa
9. movie? - break the silence.530Please respect copyright.PENANAxN6XvZ5L0R
10. song? - idk anymore and i just answered that, like, 5 minutes ago, omg.530Please respect copyright.PENANAJY21EAxUqa
11. artist? - bts.530Please respect copyright.PENANASWhQzt71hB
12. singer or band? - bts.530Please respect copyright.PENANAQHdlKfN9CY
13. memory? - idk.530Please respect copyright.PENANAVRoWfCamYo
14. book? - the cruel prince.530Please respect copyright.PENANA9znjMQxphP
this or that:530Please respect copyright.PENANAsLRoVZlhYX
15. invisibility or ability to fly? - fly.530Please respect copyright.PENANAq4r78DqySI
16. cookies or cake? - cookies.530Please respect copyright.PENANArtrFBPeHzH
17. twitter or facebook? - twitter.530Please respect copyright.PENANAGyUjIaHxrv
18. movies or books? - idk.530Please respect copyright.PENANA78yLQkjtth
19. coke or sprite? - sprite.530Please respect copyright.PENANAY8KkcwAdJ2
20. blind of deaf? - blind.530Please respect copyright.PENANACbTP7SjAE9
21. tea or coffee? - neither.530Please respect copyright.PENANAb6mts0HJXU
what's your:530Please respect copyright.PENANAo7n8uxDgq8
22. age? - ninety-one.530Please respect copyright.PENANA42H3SiC69h
23. zodiac sign? - virgo/libra cusp.530Please respect copyright.PENANAVHLVDFet8S
24. height? - 4'11.530Please respect copyright.PENANAZ9jKRLSlUT
25. sexual orientation? - bisexual.530Please respect copyright.PENANA73ATiFPyb1
26. shoe size? - seven.530Please respect copyright.PENANAHpMAoy849i
27. religion? - i'm not religious.530Please respect copyright.PENANAcPMLGFrIzU
28. longest relationship? - like, five months.530Please respect copyright.PENANAwfnMpGkyWJ
opinion on: 530Please respect copyright.PENANAaXi8SoXzJm
29. gay rights? - i'm gay...530Please respect copyright.PENANABsIhU24C8x
30. second chances? - it depends.530Please respect copyright.PENANAD2GtZEx93w
31. long distance relationships? - don't get hurt, baby.530Please respect copyright.PENANAReMRu3fw38
32. abortion? - ew.530Please respect copyright.PENANASo96BaVXV4
33. a death penalty? - ew.530Please respect copyright.PENANA4j0Yes54F9
34. marijuana? - i likes that.530Please respect copyright.PENANANh0Q70bojd
35. love? - what's love?530Please respect copyright.PENANAKM8jU0neWP
do you:530Please respect copyright.PENANAk8h1YmqGID
36. belive in ghosts? - sorta kinda.530Please respect copyright.PENANAupPFFNQDf5
530Please respect copyright.PENANAa2qS9gcIH4
omg, bye. i'm tired of this.
- Alex <3530Please respect copyright.PENANA9XYnc8mDyQ