
二十年前——314Please respect copyright.PENANAY9fypaZ80f
314Please respect copyright.PENANAcxmUFhUUMt
小荷是個人見人愛的六歲小女孩,胖胖白白的臉配上一雙水靈大眼。她每天穿著荷媽親手做的一雙由彩色布碎拼湊而成的小鞋子到處玩耍,有時會跟同村的孩子們跑上山頭採菇,有時會為獨居老人送上新鮮採摘的漂亮花朵,有時會在湖邊遊蕩。314Please respect copyright.PENANAru1XcuQkfL
314Please respect copyright.PENANA8YY7h21Yqb
荷媽曾多次提醒她切勿走近湖邊,但小荷偏偏喜歡看蓮花,說蓮花是仙女的化身。荷媽忙著預備晚餐,不甚耐煩地反譏小荷幼稚。小荷不堪被譏諷,激動嚷著會帶蓮花仙女回家,然後頭也不回衝出家門。314Please respect copyright.PENANAkUR76kCBLE
314Please respect copyright.PENANAK8WxvKDwX3
傍晚,晚餐備好了,小荷還沒有回家。荷媽心緒不寧,深怕小荷遇上意外。她挑燈外出,急步走往湖邊。314Please respect copyright.PENANADUlkH5SFAp
314Please respect copyright.PENANAuTifnEzibX
小荷不在。314Please respect copyright.PENANAJB0s9HlVp4
314Please respect copyright.PENANAKeONdCoRsi
荷媽的心頭涼了大截,連忙前去村長家求助。沒多久,大伙兒在湖邊叢林間搜索。314Please respect copyright.PENANAJbQDSGQpNH
314Please respect copyright.PENANAcSuTgIIuJI
無發現。314Please respect copyright.PENANAH3eyCTh66G
314Please respect copyright.PENANAwiaZQ95yy1
村長打算重新部署搜索行動之際,有人指著湖中央的一朵蓮花大叫:「看!湖中那朵蓮花上有一隻鞋!」314Please respect copyright.PENANAknS6525rK2
314Please respect copyright.PENANA1v8SGCxDAt
大伙兒定睛細看,卻因光線不足而未能確定那是否一隻鞋。荷媽救女心切,不理眾人勸阻跳入湖中游向那朵蓮花。游著、游著,她的身影突然消失了。314Please respect copyright.PENANA2YSDLkq21a
314Please respect copyright.PENANAeSFyxk8Wwn
為免有更多人命犧牲,村民只得待天亮才落水找荷媽。不出所料,荷媽的腳踝被水草纏住,溺斃湖底。村民認得蓮花上的鞋子確是屬於小荷,但找遍湖底亦找不到她的身影。唯有繼續在林間搜索。無果。個多月後,眾人認為找到小荷的機會渺茫,於是停止搜索。314Please respect copyright.PENANAdkQNhdF3kS
314Please respect copyright.PENANAqwaBuT2i6w
村裡開始流傳蓮花仙女帶走小荷的傳聞……314Please respect copyright.PENANAOFtJ2dfm24
314Please respect copyright.PENANAblujErzES6
「那是在你出生前發生的事情?」阿夏一邊聽得著迷,一邊望著車窗外的油油綠草地,驚嘆著這寧靜山村背後竟有這種可怕事。314Please respect copyright.PENANAeZSXu04NGt
314Please respect copyright.PENANANJuDPSqZiC
「不。當年我十歲,和小荷挺熟絡。」芙兒沒心情欣賞風景,逕自倚著椅背,微微仰首凝視車廂天花那色調偏冷的米光燈。314Please respect copyright.PENANAvhGn2Z97lD
314Please respect copyright.PENANA9u37j4jxE2
「小荷失蹤一事是你當警察的原因嗎?」阿夏與芙兒作伴數年,不難看出芙兒心事重重,尤其今趟「回鄉之旅」是離鄉別井十多年的芙兒主動提出,可見其別具意義。314Please respect copyright.PENANAWOwIo45rEM
314Please respect copyright.PENANAfENtd7p9fj
「嗯……一部份吧。不能說是完全因為她,也不能說是與這事情毫無關係。」芙兒苦笑,些許後悔無故主動提及這大煞風景的陳年往事。回鄉目的不是向各位鄉親苦老宣佈自己與阿夏的婚訊和設喜宴嗎?不是要歡天喜地、眉開眼笑嗎?314Please respect copyright.PENANA2ZdT8xagXd
314Please respect copyright.PENANASmxL9PG30X
「不管如何……」阿夏是個聰明人,明明對案件內容細節有興趣,但也知道要適可宜止。他輕拍芙兒的手背,安慰道:「事情已然過去,多想無益。」314Please respect copyright.PENANArPPvv22MYt
314Please respect copyright.PENANALjG0bNutIn
「是的。過去了。」芙兒吁一口氣,似是釋懷,奈何揪心的感覺難以單憑幾句安慰說話連根拔起。314Please respect copyright.PENANAQqo3brE9gC
314Please respect copyright.PENANAuqYT3KCO8w
顛著、簸著,好不容易來到村口。大城市發展一日千里,隱世小村亦逃不過時間巨輪的輾壓,已然根據政府的規劃建議打造成「山村旅遊區」。生來就是城市人的阿夏未曾到過農村,覺得這地方別具風味,但在村內待了十多年的芙兒卻嗤之以鼻:不也就是電視劇裡的假農村嗎?314Please respect copyright.PENANASG4f1TDLUW
314Please respect copyright.PENANAlk1aQFziii
驀地,一個想法在芙兒腦海掠過。314Please respect copyright.PENANAocX2dIX16s
314Please respect copyright.PENANAvcK8SVUKxh
「阿夏。」芙兒拉拉阿夏的手袖:「我們先去蓮花池那邊看看吧。」314Please respect copyright.PENANALxQbdzAhYT
314Please respect copyright.PENANAmej8AMIsyf
不出芙兒所料,蓮花池已面目全非。池邊的泥地與草叢變成了磚路與涼亭,上了漆的鐵製圍欄整齊繞池而立,蓮花換了個品種,顏色更亮麗奪目,尺寸亦比以往的大上數倍。唯一不變的是頭頂上的烈日,仍然熾熱得惡毒。314Please respect copyright.PENANA6Hke9tgYrq
314Please respect copyright.PENANAMC2puvid3a
芙兒逕自繞著蓮花池逆時針方向拐圈踱步。時間彷彿隨著步伐逆行,日落月出,瞬間回到二十年前那個夜晚……314Please respect copyright.PENANAlpcCbGJIh7
314Please respect copyright.PENANAqzynlrWVHx
「我帶芙兒外出散步散心。」晚飯後,芙爸病懨懨地對妻子說。314Please respect copyright.PENANABoTx7OzQlJ
314Please respect copyright.PENANA8ByVjajziE
「嗯。」芙媽忙於照顧病兒,分身不暇。314Please respect copyright.PENANAoSd5vgHtlE
314Please respect copyright.PENANAGTbLLjLsy2
夏夜有月,月下有蟬,蟬聲擾人又煩人。路上,芙爸眉頭鎖得更深。芙兒乖乖不作聲,默默尾隨他快步走。314Please respect copyright.PENANADIOqsHUGPG
314Please respect copyright.PENANADuomvZOGiT
「芙兒,你愛媽媽嗎?」314Please respect copyright.PENANAFg7nfUnbQc
314Please respect copyright.PENANADi9GXoXD9U
「愛。」314Please respect copyright.PENANAwOey37wOx2
314Please respect copyright.PENANAY9nuvYajP3
「你愛爸爸嗎?」314Please respect copyright.PENANAiFyl9ivZCT
314Please respect copyright.PENANAB2kUByu4pO
「愛。」314Please respect copyright.PENANAAs5Nwo9rn2
314Please respect copyright.PENANAxWSeL933LG
「你愛哥哥嗎?」314Please respect copyright.PENANAZa7lI94shW
314Please respect copyright.PENANAT2PrGZUs32
芙兒心裡一寒,不自已停下腳步——她早前無意間發現爸爸向前任村長秘密查詢有關人口販子的事。難道爸爸為了替哥哥籌措醫藥費而打算賣掉她?314Please respect copyright.PENANA9ynonXQjvD
314Please respect copyright.PENANAG54tY5Izwm
「你愛我嗎?」芙兒無力反問。314Please respect copyright.PENANAhIkN9i2OtN
314Please respect copyright.PENANAq9DqOM9QVw
芙爸沒有回答,繼續低頭開步走。314Please respect copyright.PENANAjXhhiTEo4n
314Please respect copyright.PENANAUGf0FhZAoy
芙兒想要跑回家去,雙腳卻不由自主隨著爸爸走,縱然明知那是不歸路。314Please respect copyright.PENANAQaNo4rQeek
314Please respect copyright.PENANAibGlDl1EWU
途經蓮花池,巧遇小荷。芙爸倏忽衝前打昏小荷。芙兒明白爸爸的意圖,連忙拉住他。314Please respect copyright.PENANAxAmjeqyKvN
314Please respect copyright.PENANAVVaWqn7Ywg
「小荷是無辜的!」314Please respect copyright.PENANA6NZmnYwLQr
314Please respect copyright.PENANA1qrh0AujFu
「但我捨不得你啊!」314Please respect copyright.PENANAhFFI7ARGnH
314Please respect copyright.PENANA35yut0CbFV
芙兒不期然鬆開了手——她聽得出話裡的割捨與堅決。爸爸向來善良老實,日子艱難亦不會做鼠竊狗偷的勾當。奈何今次關乎兒子的生命安危和女兒的命運!他寧可割捨良知,亦要保住家人。314Please respect copyright.PENANAv8SbHfxs8Z
314Please respect copyright.PENANAuV4dQYnPZ0
芙兒理解了、妥協了,芙爸眼神反倒更為悲憤不安。他脫下小荷的一隻鞋,使勁拋向蓮花池。鞋子剛好不偏不倚落在池中央的一朵大蓮花上。314Please respect copyright.PENANAd0d4tvG3sO
314Please respect copyright.PENANA4NTO7La6yB
父女兩人不約而同望向那朵大蓮花。純白蓮花被夜色沾污成帶有瘀青的淡灰色,悉才看來色彩繽紛的小鞋子亦被迫融入夜色,成了一個若隱若現的小黑點。314Please respect copyright.PENANAvdYAtryZva
314Please respect copyright.PENANAJQNHJK5kzN
小黑點,人生裡的大污點。314Please respect copyright.PENANAFOG43WTWC0
314Please respect copyright.PENANAaoxNSD7s9a
來到約定的地方。人口販子沒有芙兒想像中的鼠頭獐目。他相貌平凡,打扮平凡,舉止平凡,有如田裡的一顆穀粒,獨一無二卻平凡普通。314Please respect copyright.PENANAikXSZUpLel
314Please respect copyright.PENANAgBIbxdFmWH
二人無聲的奉上小荷,默默的收下金錢,不能見光的交易在無光的樹林中順利完成。314Please respect copyright.PENANAqS4kHF9NfQ
314Please respect copyright.PENANArXPFdJPf71
芙兒自此在這夜池邊中無限輪迴。314Please respect copyright.PENANAOJgJMUQoF1
314Please respect copyright.PENANAdtuXJ6eTD6
晝如夜,夜是夜。此人是小荷,那人是小荷,異裝同臉。池中有蓮,家中有蓮,路中有蓮,蓮上有鞋。314Please respect copyright.PENANAudT75HIGPs
314Please respect copyright.PENANAYRWEaKmYZo
瘋了。芙兒的世界瘋了。314Please respect copyright.PENANAate451bmTU
314Please respect copyright.PENANAoDZXCgiYUW
需要救贖。無人能救。只得自救。314Please respect copyright.PENANAGMPArzPLTK
314Please respect copyright.PENANAW1nkgd8pkl
救哥哥,犧牲小荷。救自己,犧牲誰?314Please respect copyright.PENANAwIbKKLK7BJ
314Please respect copyright.PENANAbcAfGI5QfZ
「記住,賣掉小荷的人是我,不是你。」314Please respect copyright.PENANA6r8ItDK0JL
314Please respect copyright.PENANAIpZ6hm760Y
「我沒有阻止你。」314Please respect copyright.PENANAHD5yrsTM4T
314Please respect copyright.PENANALI5PcpwkQq
「阻止得了麼?」314Please respect copyright.PENANAEfcqdDD6y8
314Please respect copyright.PENANAaD54d4abb4
「至少,我該要嘗試。」314Please respect copyright.PENANAY86g3eJRsd
314Please respect copyright.PENANAt4Eqyjtxvy
「嘗試有用麼?」314Please respect copyright.PENANAY1dtmaGFbK
314Please respect copyright.PENANAvPrcfqv4Ta
芙兒如夢初醒——芙爸企圖獨自扛起一切責任,救贖芙兒。她不自控笑著流淚,內心得到救贖的同時又跌落另一深淵——自己得救,爸爸犧牲。314Please respect copyright.PENANANumHbytSVl
314Please respect copyright.PENANA1WqnCBiAYY
真的得到了救贖嗎?不肯定。314Please respect copyright.PENANAFkTjUOjyCa
314Please respect copyright.PENANA2poH1sHZ2T
她離鄉到城市尋找工作,輾轉當上警察。對失蹤案尤感興趣。找人,找救贖。找到人,找不到救贖。314Please respect copyright.PENANAcKrJP6u0q3
314Please respect copyright.PENANAAaTIyn2b7a
收到來自家鄉的信,提及哥哥病逝。她丟掉信件,假裝未曾收到。根本沒意義,根本誰也沒能得救,無論犧牲多大。314Please respect copyright.PENANAbQhVuivJFm
314Please respect copyright.PENANAN2X7x6P1MB
芙媽來了,問芙兒為何不出席哥哥的喪禮。她說不知道哥哥逝世一事。芙媽低頭掩面大笑,笑了很久,然後哭了很久。「你爸說你不會為此回來,我說你不是狠心的人。原來我們都錯了——你根本不知情。」314Please respect copyright.PENANA3A1wIy5ksu
314Please respect copyright.PENANAombn4WGGO1
有甚麼值得笑或哭?芙兒不明白。或許媽媽也不明白,純粹為笑而笑、為哭而哭,無謂卻有為。至少她的情緒得以紓緩,面容不再繃緊。314Please respect copyright.PENANAitzjTO1jb6
314Please respect copyright.PENANAhK9KYmsVCW
數年後,芙媽死了。芙兒同樣沒有出席喪禮。她向上司請假數天,躲在家裡,足不出戶。不斷憶起媽媽當日又哭又笑的癲狂模樣。真羨慕。沒有隱藏,沒有秘密。314Please respect copyright.PENANAmliqQWl8ix
314Please respect copyright.PENANAwMgZ6lJ0bq
假期完結後,芙兒重投工作。警局來了一個新丁,名叫阿夏,比芙兒年輕數載。他長有一張孩子臉,胖胖白白,水靈大眼,像小荷。芙兒的目光離不開阿夏,主動接近他、勾搭他。二人由相識至同睡一床,僅是三天內的事。314Please respect copyright.PENANAZgarUvQIOq
314Please respect copyright.PENANAZ8yWSKRIgg
阿夏不解。314Please respect copyright.PENANApXcmf8G7Yt
314Please respect copyright.PENANAno3FQPOnJg
「你不似是水性楊花的女人。」314Please respect copyright.PENANANSpuUeDznB
314Please respect copyright.PENANAigOdzxzQKs
「你不似是諸事八卦的男人。」314Please respect copyright.PENANAmrbExUsShp
314Please respect copyright.PENANAFnuqgqtlSk
阿夏開始追求芙兒。芙兒不接受,卻偶爾與他同睡。為何不愛他卻會與他睡?是發洩,是鬱悶,或是對往事的情感投射?芙兒解釋不了,亦不想解釋——找到解釋之時,另一個問題就會隨即出現。314Please respect copyright.PENANAGA4cOjaMqI
314Please respect copyright.PENANAJ3yARowSMR
繼續同睡,繼續被追求,繼續找人找救贖。生活不過如此,平平凡凡,無無謂謂。314Please respect copyright.PENANAKTMQ7kHlCi
314Please respect copyright.PENANAOx01IMNK9q
數年後的某天,芙兒收到來自兒時鄰居的一通電話。對方說芙爸病重,行將就木,希望她回鄉探望。314Please respect copyright.PENANAk9v2xo7yDE
314Please respect copyright.PENANAoKkmYmoTQF
「是他希望我回去,或是大家希望我回去探望他?」314Please respect copyright.PENANAfr1Gwc2WtB
314Please respect copyright.PENANA7fT0Z448xP
「他堅持不要通知你,但大家還是決定要告訴你。」314Please respect copyright.PENANAUr7mjQZac1
314Please respect copyright.PENANAiEdzlBKq47
「我明白了。」314Please respect copyright.PENANAZCSSAB6YKv
314Please respect copyright.PENANA25WaCf74nQ
當晚,芙兒跟阿夏說要盡快回鄉宣佈婚訊、設喜宴。314Please respect copyright.PENANANmu2o1dYpI
314Please respect copyright.PENANAVjY8Nea3RB
「你跟誰結婚?」阿夏詫異。314Please respect copyright.PENANAhZTMNGfmFb
314Please respect copyright.PENANAnyd3A2BM6U
「你。」芙兒明白阿夏的不明白。314Please respect copyright.PENANAUL5fAYtouv
314Please respect copyright.PENANAL4NBS3dVFV
顛著、簸著,好不容易來到村口。大城市發展一日千里,隱世小村亦逃不過時間巨輪的輾壓,已然根據政府的規劃建議打造成「山村旅遊區」。生來就是城市人的阿夏未曾到過農村,覺得這地方別具風味,但在村內待了十多年的芙兒卻嗤之以鼻:不也就是電視劇裡的假農村嗎?314Please respect copyright.PENANAzKI6R3K9mb
314Please respect copyright.PENANAPBBMkTbGzN
驀地,一個想法在芙兒腦海掠過。314Please respect copyright.PENANAm7MhyWxM9t
314Please respect copyright.PENANA5HcELRZ6xM
「阿夏。」芙兒拉拉阿夏的手袖:「我們先去蓮花池那邊看看吧。」314Please respect copyright.PENANA1tuq8QowgI
314Please respect copyright.PENANAewKHz684hS
不出芙兒所料,蓮花池已面目全非。池邊的泥地與草叢變成了磚路與涼亭,上了漆的鐵製圍欄整齊繞池而立,蓮花換了個品種,顏色更亮麗奪目,尺寸亦比以往的大上數倍。唯一不變的是頭頂上的烈日,仍然熾熱得惡毒。314Please respect copyright.PENANAuoibO45aFP
314Please respect copyright.PENANAt1BdCWtSn1
芙兒逕自繞著蓮花池逆時針方向拐圈踱步。踱踱踱,時間有可能隨著步伐逆轉,帶她回到二十年前的那個晚上嗎?若明知結果,她還是會不阻止爸爸賣掉小荷嗎?314Please respect copyright.PENANAFTHCvKAAzI
314Please respect copyright.PENANAOfotgDP2Gg
老家陋宅裡,趁著阿夏上廁所的空檔,芙兒湊近芙爸耳邊直接問:「若明知結果,你還是會賣掉小荷嗎?」314Please respect copyright.PENANAWOS6vXfhtH
314Please respect copyright.PENANAM1xXxWdI6h
「會。」氣若柔絲的芙爸斬釘截鐵:「因為我是當爸的。」314Please respect copyright.PENANALEY1PYhvfN
314Please respect copyright.PENANAnynlhXKFQF
「若沒有遇上小荷,你會賣掉我嗎?」314Please respect copyright.PENANAZzYGkVFuPb
314Please respect copyright.PENANAJlxUwvSnaC
「會。因為你們兄妹倆都會活著。活著才會有希望。」314Please respect copyright.PENANAZdL8Q83OKk
314Please respect copyright.PENANAfUXu9KXu9E
芙兒大受刺激,轉身奪門而出。314Please respect copyright.PENANAdCO4J2Ix6a
314Please respect copyright.PENANAr6wBnNwSYQ
夏夜有月,月下有蟬,蟬聲擾人又煩人。路上行人疏落,卻異裝同臉,小荷的臉。路中倏忽生出白蓮朵朵,蓮上皆有小彩鞋一隻。芙兒知道自己瘋了,眼前盡是幻覺。理智脫軌,她不再恐懼,像個十歲的少女那樣跳脫輕盈,一步踏一蓮,來到池邊。314Please respect copyright.PENANAQc52MvEUYJ
314Please respect copyright.PENANAaqsVObkTR3
池邊有人,像小荷,像芙爸,像人口販子,像阿夏。她握著一隻彩色小鞋,木無表情直盯池中那朵大蓮花。芙兒走近女子,女子報以微笑,遞上手中小鞋。314Please respect copyright.PENANADgrLrAaOKv
314Please respect copyright.PENANAdpGyiAUWQG
芙兒接過它,模仿爸爸當晚的姿勢,以完美的拋物線弧度拋出小鞋。小鞋不偏不倚剛好落在池中央的蓮花上,有如二十年前的那夜。純白蓮花被夜色沾污成帶有瘀青的淡灰色,悉才看來色彩繽紛的小鞋子亦被迫融入夜色,成了一個若隱若現的小黑點。314Please respect copyright.PENANAeoKzv35TwV
314Please respect copyright.PENANArJ8smmNTOU
女人哈哈大笑起來,笑聲豁然開朗。芙兒腳下的白蓮和小鞋驀地消失隱去,唯獨女子依然完好站在面前。笑過以後,女子轉身離開,身影沒入林間不復見。314Please respect copyright.PENANA2dOLSHC9p8
314Please respect copyright.PENANAZuXW43LiSM
芙兒惘然——她不肯定對方是幻覺或是確切存在的真人。314Please respect copyright.PENANAFVdtyNFAcP
314Please respect copyright.PENANAmMLGHraC3Q
數日後,芙爸與世長辭。314Please respect copyright.PENANAQVAfxxVR1U
314Please respect copyright.PENANADo1zuTsqeC
「既然不需要沖喜,你還會跟我結婚嗎?」314Please respect copyright.PENANArzWX8EXa5a
314Please respect copyright.PENANAcOlWgPn5iC
「你想跟我結婚嗎?」314Please respect copyright.PENANAtnK6NOSwSa
314Please respect copyright.PENANAq58oNg0SSa
「想。我愛你。」314Please respect copyright.PENANAWGjTLD5LaV
314Please respect copyright.PENANAkzO7yVuJIY
「那就繼續吧。」314Please respect copyright.PENANA4mZEbklcDA
314Please respect copyright.PENANAQldSH7D21O
喜慶夜,大排筵席。此人是小荷,那人是小荷,新郎是小荷,老爺是小荷,奶奶是小荷,滿堂皆是小荷。芙兒帶醉喜極而泣,感激小荷前來祝福她。314Please respect copyright.PENANArD3GW0yG8P
314Please respect copyright.PENANARaEtbbIlZA
宴後,賓客散去。醉得幾近失去意識的芙兒被攙扶到新房去。滾燙的臉龐忽爾涼涼的。她知道有人為她用濕毛巾抹臉抹汗。314Please respect copyright.PENANAr7N2dQUsfe
314Please respect copyright.PENANAZZBRwhfTDj
「謝謝你……小荷……」314Please respect copyright.PENANAjL6pFMBDYX
314Please respect copyright.PENANA6xPMlo4woD
「不用客氣……」314Please respect copyright.PENANAlEIrZupR9c
314Please respect copyright.PENANALSbe2zObJO
說著說著,阿夏哭了。晶瑩淚水沿著胖白的臉頰下滑,水靈大眼楚楚可憐。像小荷。314Please respect copyright.PENANAukRwbo66T8