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I am quietly installed in my office. This is my own place, in this family home. Far from the adventures of my children, I appreciate being able to breathe calmly from time to time. There, I decompress and take the time to think, to drown myself in my thoughts, in my memories.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXG1v2LPE0l
Suddenly there is a knock at the door. I quickly slip the photo I had been looking at for several minutes into the pocket of my blouse, and pretend to be concentrating on a file. I barely have time to say, “Come in” when the door opens to reveal my daughter. At seventeen and a half years old, she has behaved like a real tornado since the start of her adolescence, four years earlier. However, in her face framed by long brown hair, childhood can still be seen.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTrQBUESMw6
— Mom, I need to talk to you about something super important ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoVEAB5l9Rw
I suppress a smile. With Orlane, everything is always mega important ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0IifhMz8uy
— Ok I hear you.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIevAN1wzcQ
— With Alexandra, we would like to get a tattoo ! She says, excited, as if it’s the best news of the year.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcZ9DQSaLpW
— A tattoo ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ826wx2Kzy9
She nods energetically.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5wUf4GOn8B
— While you are still a minor ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡae9FpwzZ1T
— Soon to be an adult.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgnUDW9UL2q
— Yes, so seventeen years and counting.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzPc8XJ25jR
— If you say so. So, is it yes ? I need parental consent to do this.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWDqSkZfiXH
— No way ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyCcvdI7BHH
As I expected, my daughter's face turns an angry red, while her light eyes darken.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6tTCZZ9ouB
— You never let me do anything cool ! She shouts, slamming the door behind her.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9oLFd3kPsn
Another of these great classics is to avoid any discussion by taking long strides. I hear him scream.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUxxn1Ca5d
— She always forbids me from everything ! She’s never there for us ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIpewWswJf
— You exaggerate ! Mom is always there whenever we need her, tries to calm my son down in a paternalistic tone.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡryc5LiMXey
Calm, thoughtful and very mature in nature for a young man of sixteen, my son has a character that is the polar opposite of that of his sister.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1DgwID83Uc
— She’s not a cool mother ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLOLcvu2WP
I decide to join them in the kitchen.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB8exmoJbJZ
— If being fashionable means letting you drink alcohol, do drugs, let you date anyone, or allow you to get tattoos, then no, I'm not cool...478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJQqwotCYli
— But why don’t you want to ? After all, it’s just a little drawing on the skin, adds my daughter with a pout.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvAoHRxGKLh
My God, how tenacious she is… Like me ultimately.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB11e4wXFU4
— Orlane, the day you want to get a tattoo for a good reason, I will accept, but not to be like your friends.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLvBi7KUJwY
My son looks at us, imperturbable.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEgYJrP226
— You definitely have a tattoo ! She accuses me, angrily.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYkzbEL3nZ2
I look down, weighing the pros and cons, and end up telling them : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXSneskhHeF
— Follow me to the living room, both of you. I need to talk to you.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPQXeCrpwi
Without a word, they accompany me, and each sit in one of the large armchairs, facing mine.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmfOJURgNm
— You are both old enough now for me to tell you a story. And please don't interrupt me. The story I am about to tell you is personal to me, but it is important that you know it, because it has made us who we are.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVPqmpvz5KX
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It all started on September 26, 1991 : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwV2JrmC9f
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Autumn has not yet arrived although the leaves of the trees are starting to turn red under the less intense rays of the sun.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB6e6uM9RTz
I detail my reflection while doing my hair in front of the mirror. I don't think I'm pretty, although many people tell me otherwise. I'm not very tall, I don't have the figure of a top model, in fact, I find myself rather ordinary. Not to mention this damn hair that refuses to stay styled the way I want it ! Giving up trying to tame them, I abandon my hairbrush and go down the stairs of the house. I'm so happy to be in high school where I'm now one of the big guys. Sixteen is the age where my real life begins, the age where my parents finally treat me like an adult and no longer like an immature child. The age when all dreams are achievable and desires possible.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7MK5rnKB2
My mind escapes for a moment to fly towards Chad, my boyfriend of several months. Chad is young, handsome, athletic and intelligent when he manages to stay focused long enough on his homework instead of thinking about sports, which is hard for him. He's not very tall, but built like a sportsman : all muscles. I like his black hair in a crew cut, and his hazel eyes. We have known each other since childhood. I had been secretly in love with him for years. In high school, I was known for being the type of serious girl, always top of the class, which did not attract boys, much to my despair. Chad is the most popular boy in school, so there was no chance he would be interested in me until a teacher asked me to help him with math. When he finally asked me to go out with him, I couldn't believe it anymore.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGApdWJaEGe
For six months, Chad and I have been in perfect love...478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMUs1kJzSBq
Okay, we only exchanged chaste kisses, we don't go out much, instead spending our time watching movies at his house. I also admit that contrary to what I had always imagined, I don't feel this passion that romance novels boast about, perhaps this is due to the fact that we have few things in common. When Chad kisses me, I have the horrible feeling of kissing my best friend but I’m sure that with time, our story will become more intense, passionate and that this feeling will disappear. After all, he’s the one I always wanted so everything will work out in the end.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbHpUMzNmVw
Letting out a romantic sigh, I enter the kitchen. Almost my entire family is gathered there : Ashley and John, my parents as well as Nina, my younger sister. The only thing missing is Nicolas, my big brother who recently left for New York University and who only comes home for the holidays.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDdNDJKAQhx
— My little Megan… The more I see you, the less you look like my baby, my mother laments, staring at me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr7jisVtcAa
She isn’t very tall, she has a face with soft features that charms most people she meets. I get her brown hair and blue eyes from her. She always expresses herself calmly, but with conviction.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQkvTYL3Uo
I act as if his rantings don't matter to me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlqiuep8EeR
— Mom, I’ll always be your daughter. And then, you have Nina as a baby…478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzndEPs78tz
My sister makes a face. At thirteen, she sees herself more as a teenager than as the youngest member of the family.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCYLTMwSqdm
— Are you still planning to go to Chad’s party tonight ? How many will you be ? Asks my father before swallowing his coffee.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GvIc46S9i
— Yes I’m going. There will be about fifty of us.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFvZtdCcjgO
My father coughs and chokes.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMSYDuvleeV
— That much ? Ask my mother in turn.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlmkboWKPxT
I nod yes.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXZrIHDjZhW
— There will be the whole class as well as Chad's friends, that's a lot of people, he's very popular at school.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRC6sGp0MeM
— That’s true, my father agrees with a touch of pride.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkpKl7Dl9gW
Even though he tends to be overprotective, I love my father very much. I find him a handsome man for his age. At forty, his dark brown hair begins to take on gray shades at the temples and expression lines slowly creep into his angular face, further marking his smile and his frown.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNuizyXKyG1
My father works in construction, his specialty is facade maintenance. He judges each house by the quality of its exterior paint ! My mother is a secretary in a real estate agency, which doesn't excite her, but she has fixed hours, which suits her perfectly. We are a middle class American family. We live in a residential neighborhood in the small town of Millisky, Pennsylvania, where almost everyone knows each other, if only by sight. The town has around five thousand souls. We have a hospital, shops, restaurants, cinemas, and even a large shopping center, so we never get bored. In addition, our town is surrounded by a beautiful forest which allows for long walks, we also have a lake about five kilometers to the south. To the west, a hill overlooks the city, it is the chic district where all the local bourgeois have built their beautiful homes, which most often only serve as second homes. To the north, a highway takes us to Pittsburgh, the nearest major city, a two hour drive, and to the east, Philadelphia is a three hour drive.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwGYMZQisNq
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A little later that day, I'm in the main hallway of the school. It is a large white building, some classrooms have faded walls, originally cream-colored, and the same goes for places of frequent passage. The central corridor has on each side of its walls, two rows of gray lockers stacked on top of each other. I take some books from mine when, turning around, I see a boy of average height, with brown hair and light eyes, walk past me. He looks at me furtively. When I meet his gaze, I feel like I'm falling from a ten- story building. It's a strange thing I've never felt before and it only lasts a few seconds. Coming to my senses, I tell myself that I must be going crazy.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWUcAhEcvfK
— Not bad, admires Amy, my best friend, who followed my gaze.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3jbvU2kdVY
— New student ? I'm asking perfunctorily as I'm sure I've never seen it before.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOv8zVDhDvJ
— I’ll find out, says my friend, narrowing her eyes with interest.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdfEfN7Riw3
— In any case, he’s very cute, I can’t help but point out.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPTnPxUFdaO
— You're the one who says that, even though you're dating the hottest boy in school ! She exclaims, shocked.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYT0siZp2BB
I smile, remembering that Chad never wanted to go out with her. He preferred me. It's so rare for a boy to reject her that I know she harbors a little resentment towards me. She has never told me openly but sometimes, like this moment, she throws a little barb at me. Without being mean, it gets heavy some days. However, she has been my friend for so long that I don't see myself falling out with her over such a small matter.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtSmacJZhyn
Later that day, in history class, I am fascinated by the documentary that the professor shows us concerning the liberation of Europe during the Second World War. This is not the first report I have seen on the subject but each time, I am caught up in the violence, the abomination of this conflict. When the images of the concentration camps appear on the screen, I look away. This is too hard for me, so I concentrate on a completely different theme. Since the start of the course, I have had the strange sensation of feeling observed. As I turn to scan the class, I see the new student sitting two rows behind me, his eyes fixed on me. When he realizes that I have noticed him, he returns his gaze to the screen. I imitate him but after a few seconds, I turn around again.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡguFejvLsG5
Grid ! I thought, giving a hint of a smile as he refocused on the documentary. For long minutes, I no longer dared to move. It's stupid but this boy intimidates me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV2kkG1C9rj
When the film ends, I turn in my seat to follow the teacher as he walks around the class summarizing what we just saw. The newcomer is still staring at me. His look is indecipherable.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7UrekaY2nv
— Imagine these families separated during endless years of war, imagine their suffering. If you had been in their place, would you have chosen resignation in the face of the invader or would you have opted for resistance ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlIiZG31cDA
I raise my hand, certain of my answer.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUsKmOGivF3
— Yes Megan.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4jFD8XVjH
— I would have chosen resistance. Faced with injustice, I think I would have been incapable of looking at the situation without taking part in the fight.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwm7A2fNfgE
— Good. Someone else's opinion ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQWxjkJyTh
Many raise their hands including the new one.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSP2ujNhLyS
— And you, what do you think ? Asks the teacher, addressing him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡesYw7M2O1k
— I believe that with hindsight, it is easy to give your opinion, but at that time, people who engaged in the resistance ran enormous risks, not only for themselves but also for those close to them. All this must be taken into consideration.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOcmMzSZWuW
— Perfect, Jessy ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEQWVO6edT6
Jessy… 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9NrDe8hBNr
I have a hard time taking my eyes off him even though his name resonates within me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqf68tLapc5
— For the next class, you will write me a presentation on this subject, continues the professor.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPXrBcvNQbV
The bell announcing the end of classes rings, the new guy immediately picks up his things and leaves, bowing his head. It makes me feel like I'm running away from the whole world.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyC5JC3JXeY
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I head to the bathroom to put some gloss on my lips and find my friends Amy and Pearl there.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq9XRgIpQcm
— So, Meg, where are you with Chad ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg9FPL9xewT
My cheeks immediately turn red.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX1W2NiU82B
— There is nothing to say.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDcv7eLXxLj
— Don’t tell us you haven’t done it yet, Amy insists.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0Tl5PYnAOA
— Well no… Well, I mean, do you feel ready ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIr0isicqKb
Amy shrugs. I know she hasn't been a virgin for some time.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMRx49MFJCn
— There’s no reason, Pearl assures. You're with the boy you've always wanted, so why not go all the way ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGQSprj2nbv
These words make me think more than they should. I've been dreaming about Chad for years, so why do I feel this stuck ? Why don't my feelings push me to open up completely ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG3fhpriwFs
I feel lost and I know perfectly well that it's not my friends I could confide in. They would immediately judge me, thinking I'm crazy for asking myself a thousand questions when I'm dating a great guy.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBtWI06a32i
If only Nick were here, I thought with regret.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ccCdwgD89
My brother would be able to advise me perfectly. It's crazy how much I miss him. Looking forward to the next vacation so he can come back to see us.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzsrUgFLRFX
— By the way, have you seen the new one ? Pearl continues, arranging her brown hair in front of the mirror. He is too beautiful ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkCBzTUYuTy
It’s true that he is beautiful ! A finely sculpted body without being skinny and a face with fine features that I find refined, piercing green eyes lined with long eyelashes, slightly messy light brown hair... I also memorized the little chain with at the end a cross that dangles from his left ear giving him a little rebellious side that I find sexy.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJgojqQwTH5
— I learned a few things about him...478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbYc9m9ARGO
This simple sentence from Amy focuses all my attention.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyxTZOkcmda
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A few hours later, at the end of classes, I found my father in the high school parking lot. This day is important to me. I pass my driving license. I am confident, because for several weeks, Chad has been teaching me everything there is to know and, according to him, I am ready.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIX6pZhYqYv
— Megan, we need to talk, my father begins.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6InLLSyxyT
Already knowing that I am going to be treated to a moral lesson, I hold back a sigh.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1d5B5yEEuy
— It’s about that party at Chad’s. You know I trust you, but... knowing you with him until late...478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuHwbSeZjVZ
When I don't answer, he continues : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG9PDUMJmID
— Will you be… serious this evening ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21k94ewZYg
— Dad, I'm still a virgin and I don't plan on that changing tonight.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1gFnWPLA2S
— Thank God, he breathes with relief after grimacing.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKF2NqeOumq
Shortly after, we return home, me with my license in my pocket and my father with the certainty that I am still innocent.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiKOaJIoRlC
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In the evening, I found Chad at his house. He lives in a large, modern and chic house, close to the city center. Their villa includes three bedrooms with an independent bathroom, a games room, an office, a fully equipped kitchen and a gigantic living room which, that evening, easily accommodated fifty guests. Outside, in a garden, in which my entire house could fit, is a heated swimming pool. As the girlfriend of the owner of the house, I make a grand entrance. I'm wearing a pretty black silk dress, perfectly fitted, which suits me perfectly. I turn heads as I pass, especially Chad who only has eyes for me. The party is in full swing, the whole class has gathered there.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPykgs0dpoz
I'm chatting with Amy in the corner of the room, when I spot the new student, Jessy, standing a little further away. He observes me while chatting with Stanley, a friend of my brother. He stares at me and gives me a small smile to which I can't help but respond.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIhAwqXOSpQ
Why am I blushing ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFC34oQuX6
— This guy is so hot. I'm going to go and get to know each other, Amy said to me, scrutinizing Jessy.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVCXHDw74kj
Without knowing why, my heart sinks.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjCEMwzJ6u5
— Amy…, my reaction is stupid. You look very pretty with this dress.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSMSH6Zny26
She smiles. I see her approach Jessy, Stanley quickly walks away while Amy launches into a tirade, pointing out several people in the room. She must inform him of the gossip that is circulating. I can't help the pang of jealousy that creeps into me when I see her place a hand on Jessy's arm. At this moment, he looks up at me, his expression is indecipherable. I have to look elsewhere... But I can't do it.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyKDL30WnM2
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're having fun ? Chad appears in front of me and places his hands on my hips.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyCw5W4SvWt
Finally I take my eyes off Amy and the new guy. I have to think about something other than his green eyes which make me feel like they are penetrating my soul.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs6UOkmwPEr
I place my lips on my boyfriend's in a brief kiss.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkrCb2vzHsJ
— Where were you ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEK0DwRzQxG
— I was walking around the house. Haven't you noticed that some people look like they've been drunk ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡryml3GwEsL
— Yes, I met Matt earlier, he reeked of alcohol.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrcbvIybiSD
— Great, Chad breathes, annoyed. If my parents find out about this, I'm dead.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Dz1nfOiyb
I glance in Jessy and Amy’s direction. He has disappeared while she returns to us, blowing : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgS1NCgSliR
— This guy is weird ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPbvcNPsdvM
— What happened with Jessy ? I said, trying to contain my relief.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhLduWmmSQp
— I don’t know, I was talking to him and, suddenly, he went out to get some fresh air. Who invited him anyway ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMguXyREAC
— It's me. We had a class together, I told him it would be the best way to meet people.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8Xn3ejyul
How nice Chad is ! That's why I love him, my heart reminds me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmV7yzLd63d
— I’m going to try to find out who brought the alcohol, he continues.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4SM5rVqwxR
— I am coming with you.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpT69qOsRQ7
We leave Amy in the living room and head towards the kitchen. A group of American football players, of which Chad is the quarterback, are seated there.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCw6m01RWJ3
— Damn, you guys are annoying ! I warned you though : no alcohol.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8lyqq2UTkL
My boyfriend raises his voice.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD1NcZAfObY
— Relax, Chad, it's just beers.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF1hJ42TE3J
— Beers or not, if my parents find out I'll be in big trouble, get rid of it ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2kY8PGoMGh
The five young people take their bottles while complaining and drop one which spills down the front of my dress.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPmKYkWdK0j
— It’s clever ! Chad exclaims as I gape.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIdTCBjL1Wo
I grab a roll of paper towels and try to wipe the alcohol off, to no avail.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG1W3YZq3ZZ
— Come with me, my boyfriend said, taking me by the hand. I don't mean to be offensive, but you stink of alcohol. We're going to have problems with your parents if you leave like that again.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXHodhEp7PY
— I know, it’s because of your stupid friends ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpwcGG93KAX
— I'm sorry. I have an idea. Go take a shower, and in the meantime, I'll wash and dry your dress and off you go, neither seen nor known ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwttbWgknoy
Having little choice, I accept.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQazPNhsx0u
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Several minutes later, which seemed like an eternity, I found Chad in his room. I am in my bathrobe and my boyfriend is holding my clean dress in his hands when there is a knock at the door. Neither of us has time to make a move that Amy and Pearl are already initiating. They stand in the doorway, look at us and mutter an apology before closing the door, giggling.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFwwi71DWLP
— Great, they’re going to think anything now, I mutter angrily.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dw0RCgbs1
— But no, they are your friends. You just need to explain the situation to them when we get down.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDgppfAQUtl
I'm not convinced, but Chad is right, they are my friends, they will definitely believe me. And then, I have nothing to reproach myself for.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJ7qu0JVzb
Clearly, this evening is far from being the evening I dreamed of ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKb5Amu2JQI
When we join the guests on the ground floor, I immediately feel that they are staring at me with eloquent little smiles. I'm going to pour myself a glass of non alcoholic punch when Amy and Pearl come to talk to me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqcP6VGLONc
— So, Meg, how was it ? Is Chad as good a shot as he seems ? Amy asks me, with a spark of curiosity in her eyes.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKC9B0KKpgg
— What are you talking about ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQiGkT31Axc
— Of you and Chad half naked in his room ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvHirNrbfz2
— That’s not at all what you think ! Nothing happened ! Some idiots had spilled beer on me. I had to take a shower while Chad cleaned my dress and he was dressed in case you didn't notice ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKrBk7Plx8w
It annoys me to have to justify myself as if I had committed a crime.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf7Te1bD43q
— But of course ! Pearl replies, giggling with Amy before walking away towards other students in our class.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYXISs8XE1i
This story is crazy, and the worst part is that no one wants to believe me, not even my best friends, at least the ones I thought were real friends. The looks that I already found embarrassing became even more insistent, and shame invaded me. It’s a shame to feel this ! Sensing my discomfort, Chad comes to join me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdSZBvmSu58
— I'm going back.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFhSemS5fw3
— But no, stay, you're not going to let these idiots ruin your evening ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVpAQdERpcn
He hugs me tightly to reassure me, but478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkHMQI0DLN
I gently push him away. There are already enough comments as it is, there is no point in adding more.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpGuRNssh0r
— No, I'm going back. See you tomorrow ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoqSXXUDg5C
Disappointed, he acquiesces. I kiss him on the tips of his lips as we usually do.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXhuwcAcmf1
— You don’t want me to take you home ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgVFxtq4m1z
— I need to walk...478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrNZ2ZJf8oy
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZXA8h6JBU
It feels good to be alone and to be able to enjoy the peace and quiet of the cool night. The moon just makes a crescent in the sky. Looking up, I admire the stars which, far from everything, don't care about the gossip that runs on Earth. Tears burn my eyes, I feel more alone than ever on this Earth which is definitely not running smoothly.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx03LUZ2km7
— Did you need to get some fresh air ? A soft voice nearby asks, bringing me out of my reverie.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPSv80V68O7
Jessy is by my side, looking up to the sky.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwM8evxQWCX
— Yes. Exactly. You too ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8vvIpq828
This is the first time I've seen him up close. Immediately, my heart races. A small diamond shines in his ear, replacing the cross he wore during the day. Two locks frame his forehead, falling in front of his eyes when he lowers his head. I know I shouldn't stare at him like that, but I can't help it. I feel like an insect attracted by a light that hypnotizes it. He looks at me, gives me a smile. Why do I feel so intimidated around him ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsUXTgtI3Zz
A breath of wind rises, making me shiver. Jessy takes off his black leather jacket and hands it to me, I put it on and thank him. Does he notice my trouble ? I don't know, but from his piercing gaze, I suspect he's enjoying the situation.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXEC63mB31O
— Yes, I needed to get some fresh air too, I don’t really like crowds. I saw you leaving, I thought maybe you’d like some company ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡppfTaRpkkf
— If you want, I shrug casually while being happy that he noticed me. Jessy, is that right ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVodaLsNHXB
He nods with a smile.
— I'm Meg...
— Megan, I know.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX1m32Jd0Qf
I look at him, surprised.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3FkWY9MHdT
— Good. What else do you know about me ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPiGWi46YBn
— Let’s see… You’re the best student in class, and you’re dating the star player of the football team.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOzJFe2FTTI
— You're good ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡicCIYvTVaP
— I guess you must have heard something about me too ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡABl6qsai0i
— Not much, actually. I just know that you are seventeen, that you have just arrived in Millisky and that you are repeating your school year.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfSSa3g4K9h
— Everything is true. It's not that serious ? What upsets you..., he adds to my astonishment.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡie0VQg5neS
— No, there are much worse things in life. It's nothing, just nonsense.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgMJCKzqCKO
— If it’s so harmless, then why did you leave your boyfriend’s party ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCoIngbqrkA
— Maybe because, this evening, I saw the true faces of my so called friends. My confidence in them melted like snow in the sun.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxq5fmogdOm
Jessy sighs as she looks up again to look at the starry sky.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW7bf7L3uq6
— I know this feeling of disappointment well.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3D0Lof19JY
— Did this happen to you too ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnyWQ2Hq5bG
He seems surprised that I am interested in him and turns to me, burying his hands in the pockets of his pants.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQdvpX4HZrn
— To be betrayed, disappointed ? Oh yes ! Although I don't understand why your friends would turn their backs on you.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbzokR40Ns9
— Haven't you heard the gossip spread by Amy and Pearl ? They told everyone that I slept with Chad. Even though I told them that this is not the case, they did not believe me, and worse, they preferred to continue to denigrate me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWUp2G57Ecr
As I tell him this, I search his eyes to check if he is sincere or if he is making fun of me like the others.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqVNavrTqt
— I have learned to no longer listen, and even less believe, what people say out of pure malice or jealousy. I am convinced that you are telling the truth.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvPerIuN5Ik
— You seem very sure of yourself for someone who doesn’t know me ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxJmtAIv7EX
He locks his gaze on mine before responding : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9l7pWCjhq
— I see in you.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaihGCsvJkB
This response leaves me speechless and upsets me more than it should. Faced with him, with his words, I feel lost. Fortunately, we arrived on my street and I just want to be alone to try to analyze what I feel.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO5p16HTp0A
— Thank you, I said, handing him back his jacket. And thank you for taking me home.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2a8nQkLWae
— At your service, he says, turning left while I continue straight.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIW8GcQO9NE
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIL50uPeNc7
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU8T5aHgo9m
The following days, nothing erases this attraction which pushes me towards Jessy. This makes me feel so guilty that I try to focus on my relationship with Chad, without really succeeding. As for Jessy, I feel like he's been running away from me since the other night. He looks away as soon as I look at him and doesn't speak to me anymore. I don't know what I did wrong for him to ignore me like that, but it pains me a lot. Perhaps he also ended up believing the nonsense that was circulated about my relationship ? If that were the case, I would be extremely hurt.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuKFLvaQ9At
It was during history class that the teacher gave me the opportunity to get closer to him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcZvwlXXQDx
— I asked each of you to write a presentation on the last lesson.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6fRwYGpw9l
At these words, several students point to their copy on their table.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlFtsC9QyQ
— Jessy, can you pick them up ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU8gord7MSL
This one executes. When he reaches my height, his gaze finally anchors on mine. I feel like seconds are becoming minutes. At this very moment, I realize how much I've missed Jessy these past few days. His hand brushes against mine as I hand him my paper, making me want to grab it and never let go.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8NMHGCusV1
As if reading my thoughts, Jessy narrows his eyes slightly and purses his lips. Then he turns away towards the next table, breaking the spell that united us as the professor continues speaking : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX01IIGJZjU
— To find out what you have learned from this course, I have prepared a written quiz for you.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCnvXEhFYCt
Immediately, boos are heard.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡheURp9Onpj
— Yes, I know, I'm not nice. While you answer the questionnaire, I will go through your presentations and form teams of two. For next week, you will have to refine your different points of view, compare them, in order to share them in front of the whole class.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIRdalDdevA
Although I am a good student, I don't particularly enjoy being on the board in front of everyone else and am already worried about who I will have to work with. As long as it's neither with Amy nor with478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ99mdTVHCm6
Pearl. I haven't spoken to them since the party at Chad's.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9gwv8Tejmc
They tried to come see me on Monday but I totally ignored them. Even if I find myself alone most of the time, Chad does not share all of my classes, I prefer that to being poorly accompanied.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXLeMrJgBLk
For long minutes, I put these thoughts aside to concentrate on the questioning.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn87SSbhHEb
When I finish, I raise my head and look behind me, towards Jessy who finishes a few seconds after me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ007x9Da3PN
The teacher notices us because he tells us : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWuDDejTsCT
— Alright. Megan and Jessy, you'll be teaming up next week. You can go.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡut55C4w6p3
At the same time, we get up and put our homework on the teacher's desk before leaving the classroom.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT1JQTtgSs7
I thought we were going to be able to discuss this project but already Jessy is quickly moving away.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGSj2Yss7kw
— Jessy, wait ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEGL3Ivp5jA
He slows down, but doesn't stop.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr18J90v24k
— We need to discuss how we are going to approach this presentation.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡroASsXEwRc
His shoulders relax and he exhales.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡabCLaACE6Q
— I don't like working with others. So I suggest you do your part on your own, I will do the same and we will meet again before the next class to compare our points of view.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlZVCzMLuOI
— Thank you for your proposal but I refuse. There's no way I'm going to get a bad grade because you're antisocial.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVuALD9pLYo
— I'm not…478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡld8tMvwH25
Before he finishes his sentence, I raise an eyebrow which interrupts him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm2zge0I603
— Okay, maybe I am a little, he admits with a little smile. Alright, you win Megan.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKrhSE9pa3u
Feeling like I need to take advantage of my advantage before he changes his mind, I quickly scribble my address on a piece of paper and hand it to him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbjuT9uJ4e0
— Come to my place at the end of classes, we will be quiet to study.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD0sMkYL9lS
— Thanks for the address but we could just as easily meet up after school and go to your house together.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS0psXocb0D
Why didn't I think of that ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlTsITWWuqS
I refrain from slapping myself.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcfZzL7XjTx
Embarrassed by my stupidity, I smile shyly. Jessy leans towards me, slips my address into his pocket and adds mischievously : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1os97f1mH
— I'm keeping it anyway. You never know, you might get lost along the way.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLG1c13auV1
I don't understand why just looking at him, talking to him, puts me in this state. I feel my cheeks on fire and I am certain that when I open my mouth, nothing but nonsense comes out.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD4EaIZrJQh
But what is happening to me ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdMngrMC67F
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtiFtOmjtPN
During the next class, I feel Chad's gaze, sitting at the desk next to mine, weighing on me suspiciously. I do my best to appear comfortable and innocent until he hands me a paper.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqilSiwSRG
What's going on with Jessy ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡabpjSxBHRh
Astonished, I wrote : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnxK1rXT2mx
What ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHIBWOFL31H
Chad's response was quick : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtzW81b1nM
Amy told me you two seem close and that I should be worried. It's the case ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8iOi6WLryo
Anger replaces disbelief. What the hell is his problem ? Is she not tired of taking care of my life, of making up stories for me ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8g50DX9CJ
No, not at all. We just have a presentation to make together. 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2IlsfZe4eL
A smile lights up Chad's features. I managed to reassure him, yet I fear I may not have been completely honest with him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY4y6UrsRhR
As I look at his profile, I have to recognize that my boyfriend no longer inspires in me the feelings that inspired me just a few months ago. I feel myself detaching myself from Chad, I come to wonder if I was only in love with him one day or if I have always confused love and friendship. Slipping my hands through my hair, I breathe deeply. The only thing I know for sure is that I am lost in my emotions.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBEcwsnoE7A
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOGwiQ1iPxx
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6DT5IDTAnu
At the end of class, Jessy comes to join me, backpack on his shoulder and a book in hand.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeHlrNhlyKH
— I love this book. I must have read it about ten times since last year, he tells me. I thought you might like to read it ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrGXzUwqSj
While walking the streets, I quickly skim a few pages.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBa4iLD93NH
— Do you mind if I save it to read tonight ? I'll give it back to you tomorrow.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVEl7qRK61H
— On the contrary. It’s so rare that I meet people who like to read something other than comics.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt4xY1eK17Z
— I understand you. Comics are Chad's favorite reading.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ0iJizp8Bl
— I'm not surprised, Chad seems more of an athlete than a cerebral one.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5JbnSpMwxH
I am left speechless.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzicd31HBCd
— Are you always this frank ? Can't help but ask him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1muiuRnHDF
He shrugs his shoulders while responding : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaaZDjAN1JU
— Very often. I hurt you ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEgZY251Y5P
I thought for a few seconds before answering him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9l3KXHqJvo
— No. I must admit that it is the truth.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNuBgJf6pwy
His smile widens, making me melt a little more.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUuiOTRiiyr
Arriving home, we sit in the living room and chat about the homework we have handed in. We both think we'll get good grades. My mother comes home from work and walks into the living room, surprising us. I suddenly feel uncomfortable being with a boy other than Chad under my parents' roof. I jump up, followed by my guest.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQYbqWd4La
— Hey, Ch…, it’s not Chad, she smiled.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJCdeU1iAd
— Mom, this is Jessy.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh1wJT3530C
They greet each other.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjzB1gQ1R8m
— We have a presentation to give to the whole class about the Second World War.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDk8sZAPUC5
With a nod, Jessy confirms my words. Since my mother arrived, he hasn't said a word, and seems intimidated. This adds as evidence : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRU8ourM2AI
— Jessy, are you staying to eat with us this evening ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKbHlYNivjS
He shrugs his shoulders.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrjfLNA7D1p
— I don't want to bother you…478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAzt44JZxan
— Don't worry, I still cook too much since Nick left for college.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmWLVh2OY2L
— Nicolas is my older brother…478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7gAm1H5zBx
— It would be a pleasure to have you with us. My husband is tired of being surrounded by girls.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1270hIMPZP
— Okay then, Jessy said, smiling. Thanks ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfOjpeg1NYp
A little later, he met my father, then Nina. When it was time to sit down at the table, without anyone telling her, Jessy naturally took a seat next to me. I control myself so as not to let my disorder appear in front of those close to me. I feel myself vibrate every time his arm brushes mine. From time to time, Jessy looks at me sideways and gives a little amused smile, and I immediately blush ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNqIuNkbbvA
The meal passes in a good atmosphere until Nina, as usual, says out loud what she is thinking : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDNn429X7Bj
— You're not bad, Jessy, but I prefer Chad. It is awesome ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXDBoeFGBli
— Nina ! We don't say that kind of thing ! Reprimands my mother.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRLd8jajCaY
— For what ? I tell the truth.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fxOU067TP
— Chad is nice, Jessy responds politely.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJipSGZAWe2
— And he’s strong ! Nina continues, making me want to throw myself over the table and strangle her.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuJIP1KDO6G
— It’s true, Chad is a great athlete, adds my father. He also taught Megan how to drive. Considering the number of guests at his party the other night, he's also very popular. He has everything going for him, this boy, says my father, whom I would like to strangle at the same time as my sister.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfAgoDC4Rqn
— It’s true that he’s really lucky, Jessy whispers, looking at me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmVdJ2Y1rjU
I stare at him, not knowing how to react. I have a sudden and insane desire to throw myself into his arms to kiss him, this idea scares me as much as his words made me happy. Also, I'm left speechless, which makes him smile more.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWI46HJ5UQC
At the end of the meal, Jessy helps me clear the table, then asks me where the bathroom is. I tell him. My mother then approaches me and gives me a little smile.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOohWlKpiKn
— This boy is very nice, she comments quietly so that only I can hear. And very cute at that.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRJdoEdnAyn
I glance at him sideways, smiling.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCqJ95WcTYR
"I suppose you know what you're doing ? "478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfgb9p92e0
— Not really.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgy3qUnGXFK
— Meg, you’re sixteen. You didn't make a lifelong commitment to Chad. You are all young, you have the right to be carefree. I was, at your age, and I didn't know your father until much later, when I decided to settle down.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRgLirAyObb
— You know very well that I am too serious to let myself be guided by my emotions without having first thought for hours.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlLmhFlzLJk
— Yes, I know, my mother sighs. And at first glance, I would say that Jessy seems to be just like you.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡapu7Uz45ta
— You think that…478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlkMAp3Qzs
I want to ask her if she thinks Jessy is interested in me, but I leave it hanging when I see him coming back to us.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdUrPfXuiv4
— Thank you very much for inviting me to your table. It's getting late, I'm going to go home.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfvnH3gvSt3
— Wait, I'm going to walk with you for a while.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrvuZar2NoY
Jessy nods before going to grab his jacket hanging on a hook in the entryway.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsNS8DyySiE
— Thanks again ! Have a good evening everyone, he says as he leaves.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMlY7uMAc9O
— Megan ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdFK236mazJ
I turn to my mother who is standing in the hallway, at the entrance to the kitchen.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUrVzfLDZBX
— I am sure of it ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2rfXrSM6j5
I give him a big smile.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWUMCxZbhGc
— She is sure of what ? Asks Jessy who heard everything from the porch.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf9ov64JP2y
— Oh, you're welcome, just something I asked him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV5LDj0cVNc
Fortunately, he doesn't insist.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Blpg6JxaF
We walk down the sidewalk in silence.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZGs4vJQrAJ
My neighborhood is a quiet place, where all the houses478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf4o1BYRwcs
look alike with their little white fence surrounding the garden. Only the colors of the houses vary from one to another, sometimes white with blue shutters, sometimes brown with red shutters. Our family home is cream with green shutters. My father makes a point of maintaining it well, repainting it as soon as the paint shows signs of age, and mowing the lawn regularly. This corner of the city is not known for being the richest, but at least its inhabitants ensure that nothing can damage it. I love this quiet little town which seems to live as if in a cocoon where nothing serious ever happens and where the smallest event, like the arrival of Jessy, is experienced as big news. This thought pulls me out of my reverie and, turning back to my companion, I decide to question him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzN8MHnqyuE
— Did you move here alone ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdkXLkS31F
This seems incongruous to me since he is only seventeen, but I never see him with anyone, not even in town.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6DdEuLHf3H
— No, I live with my mother.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ePMGVhtls
— And your father ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSlWMPUCJcJ
— My father died when I was a kid.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvpMtMCjyom
— Sorry.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDmGxpyRRYe
— It's nothing. My mother remarried and I have a little brother, Jason, who is now seven.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlQcFh9i4BT
— So your father in law and your brother live with you ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeUMi3oGYEB
Jessy grimace. 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGikZkPvOEc
— No, they stayed in Allentown.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhBRJp3A3o
— For what ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfI0bqPMluL
Jessy gives me a big smile while answering : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrSXZpHE2s
— Joker ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZKFqdrGisX
Preferring not to insist, I move on to other questions : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaXnUNermnu
— Why did you leave Allentown ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDBz0wsiFnk
— Re joker ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1AaUbw6vuO
— OK. I always see you alone... but you must have friends ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGes1l6CO9J
— You know, I just arrived and I don’t know anyone yet, except you. In Allentown, I had friends, or so I thought, but..., he interrupts himself, purses his lips, shaking his head : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy9iGuiuJoS
— I don't want to talk about it... Let's just say, sometimes you think you know people and you're wrong.
— Like me the other night...478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPtQvo8TXNP
Looking serious, he nods.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ97bv9oPs8Q
— So you’re from Allentown ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuvGHXKnvsO
— Yes, I lived in a small neighborhood where everyone had known each other forever, a bit like this one. (He looks around.) Except that in town, we couldn't see the stars as well.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrMBnh6IyFt
I follow his gaze, staring at the sky illuminated by hundreds of sparkling points that no cloud hides. I feel very small and fragile in the face of this immensity. It's strange to find myself next to this boy to whom I feel close and who, at the same time, intimidates me so much.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx8ndf2eEza
— Your family loves Chad very much, he said suddenly, breaking this magical moment. How long have you been together ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr5hfG9z5gX
I sit on the low wall bordering a house for sale.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMmpSQKIKnE
— My father was a big athlete in high school and I think he recognizes himself in Chad. My mother finds him cute and nice, and my sister is in love with him, I think ! (I smile.) He and I have known each other for a very long time, since kindergarten in fact…478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmXU9e80lDg
— And you’ve always loved him, Jessy adds, sitting down next to me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUobTo6ax2J
I blush and lower my head.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbE6EdcCAkR
— It’s complicated… But let’s talk about you instead. Did you leave a girlfriend in Allentown ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmV4ppfh2sn
Jessy turns to me and raises his eyebrows, visibly surprised. I stare at him, both impatient and dreading his answer.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhmBuNTY6AS
— Your question is strange...
— Why ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHvA7oC8C6I
— Because you're dating the perfect guy according to everyone around you, so I wonder what your questioning is hiding.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq4L6yx5zqN
— It wasn’t you who told me that you shouldn’t necessarily listen to what others say ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPIESDY5o5C
— Touché, he smiled. Let's say I had a girlfriend.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmabWFGw6Eb
— You still have ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8faNmmYcvj
— Well no, we split up...478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4OCIGAkOh1
I don't give him time to finish his sentence as my lips are already on his. Immediately, he kisses me back.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJMU589xL7
His lips are soft and warm on mine, I feel him slide a hand to my waist, pulling me closer to him until, as suddenly as it began, he pushes me back forcefully before standing up abruptly. jump, visibly annoyed.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWRHDLRpFb
— That’s not true ! Why did you do it ? He writes to himself while standing in front of me, hands on hips waiting for a response.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbjx5pGWhXk
— I don’t know, I said as sincerely as possible. Since I met you, I have felt lost. I don't know why but I feel like I've known you forever and this feeling totally upsets me. I was hoping you felt the same way I did.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwexgYrnkx0
Far from calming down, Jessy walks away from me, walking as quickly as he can. I get up and run after him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0rJAEA81LR
— Jessy, wait ! What is happening ? Please don't tell me that kiss was that bad ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GDJqiRpxO
He doesn't stop though. I grab him by one arm, forcing him to stop his way.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEQE0NF6izE
He glares at me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsGi7wClSFk
— I'm sorry if... I shouldn't have kissed you, but I honestly thought you wanted to too.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYxxeNZlY4C
— It is, he whispers, staring at me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ22ozPZhCWg
— So where is the problem ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6HNPR3AMwt
— I can not do that.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ33IKLASCe9
— But why ? I know that compared to Chad it's a bad thing but...478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlll0S6B3OY
— It has nothing to do with him. The problem is me. I'm not made for love, he gets angry again. I gave too much, now that is forbidden to me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTW1WsQ9jk
He frees himself from my hand before continuing on his way. Staying there, I say to him : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9qbCHDBPcg
— I don't understand ! You can't pretend to want to kiss me and then run away like that a second later. It's not me who made you suffer so why should I pay for what others made you endure ? I'm not your ex ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWjG5zHinAk
Abruptly, he stops his running, turns around before coming back towards me. His features are distorted by anger but I also read a form of pain there.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ02iDScr4U
— No, you are not the one who changed my life and I in no way wish to become the one who changes yours in the same way ! My life is ruined Meg, I'm already at the end. I'm going to die, he adds when he sees that I don't understand his words.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ41DALdARi
— Wh... What ? I stammer, in shock.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSPa8nLxNAf
He gets closer. His face is only a few centimeters from mine.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbWbmi004nZ
— Meg, I'm HIV positive. I have the AIDS virus, he admits quietly so that no one else can hear him, although the street is deserted. So stay away from me, believe me it's better ! 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBaLMGLCEQP
He leaves as quickly as possible. Soon night envelops it completely. For a long moment, I stay there, dismayed, unable to make the slightest gesture, no longer knowing what to think. His words seem to spin in my head like a wild merry go round that no one can stop. I don't know how long I stand on that sidewalk looking in his direction long after he's gone.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhR6VPlPEs
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqWhrVIxNT5
478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqNXtoZQ0A7
When I get home, I try not to let anything show and lock myself in the kitchen. I thought I would be safe, but as soon as I closed the door, my mother opened it and stuck her head in.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbhFTqWfhAJ
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're very pale, aren't you sick ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfJNao1rWtm
— Everything is fine. I miss Nicolas, I would like to talk to him.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEayrKgNtyr
Understanding the message, my mother nods and closes the door behind her. Immediately, I grab the phone and dial my brother’s number. Luckily he answers after two rings.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu5R4gzOsTY
— Hello ? he says, happily.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc7gZ4TmUEv
— Nick, it’s me.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1dWMVsoozK
I'm having a hard time keeping the tremors in my voice at bay.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kCICNt9YF
— Meg, what’s going on ? He worries.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLbciLagD0F
The day I met Jessy, I told my brother that same evening. He seemed happy that a boy other than Chad was messing with me. For some reason, Nick always grimaced at my relationship with Chad. 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnKf2882c8j
— Jessy came to the house for dinner this evening... 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgq7ItXU0Kv
— Oh, he sighs, he threw you away.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ93B89q8XIV
I think about the way I kissed him and feel myself blushing again. If I had known how he was going to push me away, I would never have let myself be carried away by my desire.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPbCxGlNQ20
— Yes, but that’s not the worst, I sob. Jessy admitted to me that she was sick.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5mQxD2e0ip
Realizing the horror of the situation, I fall to the ground. I am not afraid of AIDS, I know that I risk nothing. But I am terrified for Jessy, for his future which is likely to be short. My brother doesn't speak, he gives me time to calm down. When my sobs dry up, I continue : 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMuNab5nLjt
— Jessy is HIV positive, I blurt out in one breath.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrD3xT3cPOI
A gasp of surprise escapes my brother.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu9egzSBat8
— Okay, he breathes, making me understand that he’s thinking about the situation. What are you going to do ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡASRZJYXGjq
— I don't know. Nick, I need to know your opinion.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡITtCkEtE1Q
— I admit that I didn't expect that at all. Do you see yourself turning your back on him ? 478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbHrLjU9Bdf
— I wouldn't be able to.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSOdSi2fbO4
— Meg, I know this probably isn't the kind of relationship you imagined, but based on what you've told me so far about this guy, I think right now he especially needs support and friendship. Don’t reject him because he doesn’t match your ideal.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh83DNfam9q
— Exactly, he corresponds to my ideal and the fact that he is ill changes nothing. If I am devastated it is because AIDS is an incurable disease. I don't want him to die, Nick, I'm crying again.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG9IJdiNUAB
I am aware that I have only known him for a short time but, without being able to explain it, he has already marked my existence.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuZIhYdSUxB
— Come on, little sister, don’t cry. For now, Jessy is alive and, even if he keeps you at a distance, I'm sure he would be happy to have you in his life. Try to make him smile while he's here. He must need to think about something other than this crap.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyFhqYyKQ9D
— You're right. Nick, what I confided to you must absolutely remain between us. No one should know.478Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG4EY5W6L4Q
— Finally you know me ! Come on now tell me how he dumped you ! He laughs as I bite my lip in shame.
