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I am quietly installed in my office. This is my own place, in this family home. Far from the adventures of my children, I appreciate being able to breathe calmly from time to time. There, I decompress and take the time to think, to drown myself in my thoughts, in my memories.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGn19qPGVRP
Suddenly there is a knock at the door. I quickly slip the photo I had been looking at for several minutes into the pocket of my blouse, and pretend to be concentrating on a file. I barely have time to say, “Come in” when the door opens to reveal my daughter. At seventeen and a half years old, she has behaved like a real tornado since the start of her adolescence, four years earlier. However, in her face framed by long brown hair, childhood can still be seen.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbvvjlOFynW
— Mom, I need to talk to you about something super important ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzJY5d7jTf
I suppress a smile. With Orlane, everything is always mega important ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiPao4qKmo2
— Ok I hear you.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVYUBwPTXqX
— With Alexandra, we would like to get a tattoo ! She says, excited, as if it’s the best news of the year.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT1prCtXEfv
— A tattoo ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh6cLT3cag6
She nods energetically.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcAjvfdvEml
— While you are still a minor ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmoOLotLXT3
— Soon to be an adult.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBD2rjXVcGK
— Yes, so seventeen years and counting.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKMb8dV0ek3
— If you say so. So, is it yes ? I need parental consent to do this.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1trXe5y4AG
— No way ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPtA37Zqdsw
As I expected, my daughter's face turns an angry red, while her light eyes darken.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg0X8q5I4Md
— You never let me do anything cool ! She shouts, slamming the door behind her.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlrgzWPDfU3
Another of these great classics is to avoid any discussion by taking long strides. I hear him scream.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyiPJAv4Yok
— She always forbids me from everything ! She’s never there for us ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzKE2o6p3tu
— You exaggerate ! Mom is always there whenever we need her, tries to calm my son down in a paternalistic tone.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzO7hFtbPBV
Calm, thoughtful and very mature in nature for a young man of sixteen, my son has a character that is the polar opposite of that of his sister.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJKTG9V7Vu6
— She’s not a cool mother ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1gnudHcNj7
I decide to join them in the kitchen.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNS2MwQh8Z8
— If being fashionable means letting you drink alcohol, do drugs, let you date anyone, or allow you to get tattoos, then no, I'm not cool...495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCpw6GYUbCI
— But why don’t you want to ? After all, it’s just a little drawing on the skin, adds my daughter with a pout.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2QQH06qZ9
My God, how tenacious she is… Like me ultimately.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vW5xkiEKr
— Orlane, the day you want to get a tattoo for a good reason, I will accept, but not to be like your friends.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡigP6CNBUaC
My son looks at us, imperturbable.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIh6CHAOqwh
— You definitely have a tattoo ! She accuses me, angrily.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3DpADA5yv1
I look down, weighing the pros and cons, and end up telling them : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0PaFarre1C
— Follow me to the living room, both of you. I need to talk to you.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmWyXFdDNk3
Without a word, they accompany me, and each sit in one of the large armchairs, facing mine.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlMcsAAx0Vd
— You are both old enough now for me to tell you a story. And please don't interrupt me. The story I am about to tell you is personal to me, but it is important that you know it, because it has made us who we are.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYemRAKOyZa
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It all started on September 26, 1991 : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT6OThs6j84
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Autumn has not yet arrived although the leaves of the trees are starting to turn red under the less intense rays of the sun.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv1wVPcB2fI
I detail my reflection while doing my hair in front of the mirror. I don't think I'm pretty, although many people tell me otherwise. I'm not very tall, I don't have the figure of a top model, in fact, I find myself rather ordinary. Not to mention this damn hair that refuses to stay styled the way I want it ! Giving up trying to tame them, I abandon my hairbrush and go down the stairs of the house. I'm so happy to be in high school where I'm now one of the big guys. Sixteen is the age where my real life begins, the age where my parents finally treat me like an adult and no longer like an immature child. The age when all dreams are achievable and desires possible.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzgZeMQNT27
My mind escapes for a moment to fly towards Chad, my boyfriend of several months. Chad is young, handsome, athletic and intelligent when he manages to stay focused long enough on his homework instead of thinking about sports, which is hard for him. He's not very tall, but built like a sportsman : all muscles. I like his black hair in a crew cut, and his hazel eyes. We have known each other since childhood. I had been secretly in love with him for years. In high school, I was known for being the type of serious girl, always top of the class, which did not attract boys, much to my despair. Chad is the most popular boy in school, so there was no chance he would be interested in me until a teacher asked me to help him with math. When he finally asked me to go out with him, I couldn't believe it anymore.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGG5EvLPnMr
For six months, Chad and I have been in perfect love...495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkAShPiVofc
Okay, we only exchanged chaste kisses, we don't go out much, instead spending our time watching movies at his house. I also admit that contrary to what I had always imagined, I don't feel this passion that romance novels boast about, perhaps this is due to the fact that we have few things in common. When Chad kisses me, I have the horrible feeling of kissing my best friend but I’m sure that with time, our story will become more intense, passionate and that this feeling will disappear. After all, he’s the one I always wanted so everything will work out in the end.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZx26Dido2J
Letting out a romantic sigh, I enter the kitchen. Almost my entire family is gathered there : Ashley and John, my parents as well as Nina, my younger sister. The only thing missing is Nicolas, my big brother who recently left for New York University and who only comes home for the holidays.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9R9uAYk1Ym
— My little Megan… The more I see you, the less you look like my baby, my mother laments, staring at me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFasDVf3EuH
She isn’t very tall, she has a face with soft features that charms most people she meets. I get her brown hair and blue eyes from her. She always expresses herself calmly, but with conviction.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2uKmejbjjs
I act as if his rantings don't matter to me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjk3LuMutvM
— Mom, I’ll always be your daughter. And then, you have Nina as a baby…495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIYAcPr0oWA
My sister makes a face. At thirteen, she sees herself more as a teenager than as the youngest member of the family.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJAuR9a1d0V
— Are you still planning to go to Chad’s party tonight ? How many will you be ? Asks my father before swallowing his coffee.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50AK9YDBNd
— Yes I’m going. There will be about fifty of us.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCE0Mfs0Bcb
My father coughs and chokes.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskVtp6yGTH
— That much ? Ask my mother in turn.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8n6S0huCMC
I nod yes.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdik0cL8rtH
— There will be the whole class as well as Chad's friends, that's a lot of people, he's very popular at school.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFiAfoMRKPZ
— That’s true, my father agrees with a touch of pride.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvhxKRmfyu3
Even though he tends to be overprotective, I love my father very much. I find him a handsome man for his age. At forty, his dark brown hair begins to take on gray shades at the temples and expression lines slowly creep into his angular face, further marking his smile and his frown.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp7OcbDSybo
My father works in construction, his specialty is facade maintenance. He judges each house by the quality of its exterior paint ! My mother is a secretary in a real estate agency, which doesn't excite her, but she has fixed hours, which suits her perfectly. We are a middle class American family. We live in a residential neighborhood in the small town of Millisky, Pennsylvania, where almost everyone knows each other, if only by sight. The town has around five thousand souls. We have a hospital, shops, restaurants, cinemas, and even a large shopping center, so we never get bored. In addition, our town is surrounded by a beautiful forest which allows for long walks, we also have a lake about five kilometers to the south. To the west, a hill overlooks the city, it is the chic district where all the local bourgeois have built their beautiful homes, which most often only serve as second homes. To the north, a highway takes us to Pittsburgh, the nearest major city, a two hour drive, and to the east, Philadelphia is a three hour drive.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡENHeqX4eQX
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A little later that day, I'm in the main hallway of the school. It is a large white building, some classrooms have faded walls, originally cream-colored, and the same goes for places of frequent passage. The central corridor has on each side of its walls, two rows of gray lockers stacked on top of each other. I take some books from mine when, turning around, I see a boy of average height, with brown hair and light eyes, walk past me. He looks at me furtively. When I meet his gaze, I feel like I'm falling from a ten- story building. It's a strange thing I've never felt before and it only lasts a few seconds. Coming to my senses, I tell myself that I must be going crazy.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡww7X6Jb3Wu
— Not bad, admires Amy, my best friend, who followed my gaze.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcpjRyxYHMx
— New student ? I'm asking perfunctorily as I'm sure I've never seen it before.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHOVhpJszk
— I’ll find out, says my friend, narrowing her eyes with interest.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdbnPoRgvV1
— In any case, he’s very cute, I can’t help but point out.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1aIhGPsq2b
— You're the one who says that, even though you're dating the hottest boy in school ! She exclaims, shocked.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡckEdvesYNU
I smile, remembering that Chad never wanted to go out with her. He preferred me. It's so rare for a boy to reject her that I know she harbors a little resentment towards me. She has never told me openly but sometimes, like this moment, she throws a little barb at me. Without being mean, it gets heavy some days. However, she has been my friend for so long that I don't see myself falling out with her over such a small matter.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9wQIhz2Lei
Later that day, in history class, I am fascinated by the documentary that the professor shows us concerning the liberation of Europe during the Second World War. This is not the first report I have seen on the subject but each time, I am caught up in the violence, the abomination of this conflict. When the images of the concentration camps appear on the screen, I look away. This is too hard for me, so I concentrate on a completely different theme. Since the start of the course, I have had the strange sensation of feeling observed. As I turn to scan the class, I see the new student sitting two rows behind me, his eyes fixed on me. When he realizes that I have noticed him, he returns his gaze to the screen. I imitate him but after a few seconds, I turn around again.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRPaSGYgL0R
Grid ! I thought, giving a hint of a smile as he refocused on the documentary. For long minutes, I no longer dared to move. It's stupid but this boy intimidates me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9CYPVayXqq
When the film ends, I turn in my seat to follow the teacher as he walks around the class summarizing what we just saw. The newcomer is still staring at me. His look is indecipherable.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbokfzsoU2G
— Imagine these families separated during endless years of war, imagine their suffering. If you had been in their place, would you have chosen resignation in the face of the invader or would you have opted for resistance ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB5i6RjIDBk
I raise my hand, certain of my answer.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpW96jQom72
— Yes Megan.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4xLB3A1JVq
— I would have chosen resistance. Faced with injustice, I think I would have been incapable of looking at the situation without taking part in the fight.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFMnNBei4FR
— Good. Someone else's opinion ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ09WBN28Yks
Many raise their hands including the new one.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRMkCLot90
— And you, what do you think ? Asks the teacher, addressing him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqLKfQdXxFM
— I believe that with hindsight, it is easy to give your opinion, but at that time, people who engaged in the resistance ran enormous risks, not only for themselves but also for those close to them. All this must be taken into consideration.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQJhzSdXynY
— Perfect, Jessy ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmG8Vmn3JuT
Jessy… 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ45ROBQDAgo
I have a hard time taking my eyes off him even though his name resonates within me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWSv6lzRs07
— For the next class, you will write me a presentation on this subject, continues the professor.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVxdFE9HgGy
The bell announcing the end of classes rings, the new guy immediately picks up his things and leaves, bowing his head. It makes me feel like I'm running away from the whole world.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpGQCUNDBuM
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I head to the bathroom to put some gloss on my lips and find my friends Amy and Pearl there.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzWEmemMox7
— So, Meg, where are you with Chad ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzB9VPaZ8Go
My cheeks immediately turn red.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKKU3CpZnmY
— There is nothing to say.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNfriX60oas
— Don’t tell us you haven’t done it yet, Amy insists.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwYdpM2I2JB
— Well no… Well, I mean, do you feel ready ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZtQuWkjgDp
Amy shrugs. I know she hasn't been a virgin for some time.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1DAV90hDu6
— There’s no reason, Pearl assures. You're with the boy you've always wanted, so why not go all the way ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsMuHxHaMYi
These words make me think more than they should. I've been dreaming about Chad for years, so why do I feel this stuck ? Why don't my feelings push me to open up completely ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6vcM4M9TX0
I feel lost and I know perfectly well that it's not my friends I could confide in. They would immediately judge me, thinking I'm crazy for asking myself a thousand questions when I'm dating a great guy.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtEFv8NR0W
If only Nick were here, I thought with regret.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi5R5KhHuJn
My brother would be able to advise me perfectly. It's crazy how much I miss him. Looking forward to the next vacation so he can come back to see us.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9CLkhufoSS
— By the way, have you seen the new one ? Pearl continues, arranging her brown hair in front of the mirror. He is too beautiful ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCpLE92rgEa
It’s true that he is beautiful ! A finely sculpted body without being skinny and a face with fine features that I find refined, piercing green eyes lined with long eyelashes, slightly messy light brown hair... I also memorized the little chain with at the end a cross that dangles from his left ear giving him a little rebellious side that I find sexy.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ifECcXsIW
— I learned a few things about him...495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9nlxLWwCsj
This simple sentence from Amy focuses all my attention.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ58jWFwZmjF
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A few hours later, at the end of classes, I found my father in the high school parking lot. This day is important to me. I pass my driving license. I am confident, because for several weeks, Chad has been teaching me everything there is to know and, according to him, I am ready.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdOlLaTojia
— Megan, we need to talk, my father begins.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOBqBGcZrrb
Already knowing that I am going to be treated to a moral lesson, I hold back a sigh.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvDnURRVltv
— It’s about that party at Chad’s. You know I trust you, but... knowing you with him until late...495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG3uJsUaZLM
When I don't answer, he continues : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ14KWGlGWVK
— Will you be… serious this evening ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNyVAXXAUSb
— Dad, I'm still a virgin and I don't plan on that changing tonight.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtwbb2WuAt
— Thank God, he breathes with relief after grimacing.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeE8K7JVrXO
Shortly after, we return home, me with my license in my pocket and my father with the certainty that I am still innocent.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyuHjyYIDZB
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In the evening, I found Chad at his house. He lives in a large, modern and chic house, close to the city center. Their villa includes three bedrooms with an independent bathroom, a games room, an office, a fully equipped kitchen and a gigantic living room which, that evening, easily accommodated fifty guests. Outside, in a garden, in which my entire house could fit, is a heated swimming pool. As the girlfriend of the owner of the house, I make a grand entrance. I'm wearing a pretty black silk dress, perfectly fitted, which suits me perfectly. I turn heads as I pass, especially Chad who only has eyes for me. The party is in full swing, the whole class has gathered there.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeJEI6A5b5d
I'm chatting with Amy in the corner of the room, when I spot the new student, Jessy, standing a little further away. He observes me while chatting with Stanley, a friend of my brother. He stares at me and gives me a small smile to which I can't help but respond.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBygPtL1P1c
Why am I blushing ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdIm5f14nWY
— This guy is so hot. I'm going to go and get to know each other, Amy said to me, scrutinizing Jessy.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEuS887uGNe
Without knowing why, my heart sinks.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhVMH0HZoR3
— Amy…, my reaction is stupid. You look very pretty with this dress.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmU03m7LeRy
She smiles. I see her approach Jessy, Stanley quickly walks away while Amy launches into a tirade, pointing out several people in the room. She must inform him of the gossip that is circulating. I can't help the pang of jealousy that creeps into me when I see her place a hand on Jessy's arm. At this moment, he looks up at me, his expression is indecipherable. I have to look elsewhere... But I can't do it.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD9okgaryRb
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're having fun ? Chad appears in front of me and places his hands on my hips.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD8DpXzzDwO
Finally I take my eyes off Amy and the new guy. I have to think about something other than his green eyes which make me feel like they are penetrating my soul.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIpp2F41Xv
I place my lips on my boyfriend's in a brief kiss.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxpK1H8XvUb
— Where were you ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAKn827Txok
— I was walking around the house. Haven't you noticed that some people look like they've been drunk ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeZjvdEA5qg
— Yes, I met Matt earlier, he reeked of alcohol.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCabtZrEwmA
— Great, Chad breathes, annoyed. If my parents find out about this, I'm dead.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmLcoadinm9
I glance in Jessy and Amy’s direction. He has disappeared while she returns to us, blowing : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ1AsaB5IgX
— This guy is weird ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf5B5YJuXs3
— What happened with Jessy ? I said, trying to contain my relief.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4K5PNGi3V
— I don’t know, I was talking to him and, suddenly, he went out to get some fresh air. Who invited him anyway ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa3AGmEQTAX
— It's me. We had a class together, I told him it would be the best way to meet people.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbKs8c7CV9t
How nice Chad is ! That's why I love him, my heart reminds me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo5Oc3FF7iV
— I’m going to try to find out who brought the alcohol, he continues.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA7mOGAu1PJ
— I am coming with you.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡykyaVd5O7d
We leave Amy in the living room and head towards the kitchen. A group of American football players, of which Chad is the quarterback, are seated there.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCEJVlE1KlL
— Damn, you guys are annoying ! I warned you though : no alcohol.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYVcRVix7v
My boyfriend raises his voice.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKT9v7kdvNE
— Relax, Chad, it's just beers.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx35tvzlxlM
— Beers or not, if my parents find out I'll be in big trouble, get rid of it ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOHpYuayG8C
The five young people take their bottles while complaining and drop one which spills down the front of my dress.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMmHUXhKTd1
— It’s clever ! Chad exclaims as I gape.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfq2F7Wvs5N
I grab a roll of paper towels and try to wipe the alcohol off, to no avail.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMK8TQe5hzE
— Come with me, my boyfriend said, taking me by the hand. I don't mean to be offensive, but you stink of alcohol. We're going to have problems with your parents if you leave like that again.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQA7FaFCEGo
— I know, it’s because of your stupid friends ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN97FAcAhEe
— I'm sorry. I have an idea. Go take a shower, and in the meantime, I'll wash and dry your dress and off you go, neither seen nor known ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVTUDCRtpel
Having little choice, I accept.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6CkDBpPZA0
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Several minutes later, which seemed like an eternity, I found Chad in his room. I am in my bathrobe and my boyfriend is holding my clean dress in his hands when there is a knock at the door. Neither of us has time to make a move that Amy and Pearl are already initiating. They stand in the doorway, look at us and mutter an apology before closing the door, giggling.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡimP2JVeq3v
— Great, they’re going to think anything now, I mutter angrily.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ18Z1hpbG6A
— But no, they are your friends. You just need to explain the situation to them when we get down.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhZ5UJ9ggqV
I'm not convinced, but Chad is right, they are my friends, they will definitely believe me. And then, I have nothing to reproach myself for.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6QZISVqbdY
Clearly, this evening is far from being the evening I dreamed of ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6nWnIDbMm0
When we join the guests on the ground floor, I immediately feel that they are staring at me with eloquent little smiles. I'm going to pour myself a glass of non alcoholic punch when Amy and Pearl come to talk to me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnhfb5lf988
— So, Meg, how was it ? Is Chad as good a shot as he seems ? Amy asks me, with a spark of curiosity in her eyes.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡApBchS8bAR
— What are you talking about ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXefdGHag7V
— Of you and Chad half naked in his room ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZl8mbmNRZA
— That’s not at all what you think ! Nothing happened ! Some idiots had spilled beer on me. I had to take a shower while Chad cleaned my dress and he was dressed in case you didn't notice ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiz1KeXcIcc
It annoys me to have to justify myself as if I had committed a crime.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9lhGvOj0S6
— But of course ! Pearl replies, giggling with Amy before walking away towards other students in our class.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9dLc6MFAGG
This story is crazy, and the worst part is that no one wants to believe me, not even my best friends, at least the ones I thought were real friends. The looks that I already found embarrassing became even more insistent, and shame invaded me. It’s a shame to feel this ! Sensing my discomfort, Chad comes to join me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYf2V0qiOha
— I'm going back.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv71EUsELw9
— But no, stay, you're not going to let these idiots ruin your evening ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7F6U3HZb2h
He hugs me tightly to reassure me, but495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBPXxipZEe
I gently push him away. There are already enough comments as it is, there is no point in adding more.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjtnUfScGt
— No, I'm going back. See you tomorrow ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTblO9Y96Dt
Disappointed, he acquiesces. I kiss him on the tips of his lips as we usually do.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkXsGEyU8NO
— You don’t want me to take you home ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcy0o75lqQd
— I need to walk...495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDnoVsiMVwP
495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5InSdDN3S8
It feels good to be alone and to be able to enjoy the peace and quiet of the cool night. The moon just makes a crescent in the sky. Looking up, I admire the stars which, far from everything, don't care about the gossip that runs on Earth. Tears burn my eyes, I feel more alone than ever on this Earth which is definitely not running smoothly.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbgZQrFLVy1
— Did you need to get some fresh air ? A soft voice nearby asks, bringing me out of my reverie.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQZt80KzOh
Jessy is by my side, looking up to the sky.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGjowJkNN02
— Yes. Exactly. You too ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZKkNQPLnyD
This is the first time I've seen him up close. Immediately, my heart races. A small diamond shines in his ear, replacing the cross he wore during the day. Two locks frame his forehead, falling in front of his eyes when he lowers his head. I know I shouldn't stare at him like that, but I can't help it. I feel like an insect attracted by a light that hypnotizes it. He looks at me, gives me a smile. Why do I feel so intimidated around him ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfd7H1lbDZY
A breath of wind rises, making me shiver. Jessy takes off his black leather jacket and hands it to me, I put it on and thank him. Does he notice my trouble ? I don't know, but from his piercing gaze, I suspect he's enjoying the situation.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmxqyaI6bFd
— Yes, I needed to get some fresh air too, I don’t really like crowds. I saw you leaving, I thought maybe you’d like some company ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhA0nQuBmrM
— If you want, I shrug casually while being happy that he noticed me. Jessy, is that right ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCVE1rF40qX
He nods with a smile.
— I'm Meg...
— Megan, I know.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoqhp1mDJwA
I look at him, surprised.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxq6SdvLCWp
— Good. What else do you know about me ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡryzuGtJsTE
— Let’s see… You’re the best student in class, and you’re dating the star player of the football team.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaI8AJF3wNL
— You're good ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRke5Qp5D4p
— I guess you must have heard something about me too ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVm6yMkQIIl
— Not much, actually. I just know that you are seventeen, that you have just arrived in Millisky and that you are repeating your school year.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhNM1SdPlWD
— Everything is true. It's not that serious ? What upsets you..., he adds to my astonishment.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnsxNpZljYI
— No, there are much worse things in life. It's nothing, just nonsense.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkS2axu2Zl
— If it’s so harmless, then why did you leave your boyfriend’s party ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9eFdwJsnVH
— Maybe because, this evening, I saw the true faces of my so called friends. My confidence in them melted like snow in the sun.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEfbxOEjiiM
Jessy sighs as she looks up again to look at the starry sky.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXg5N4CAyrj
— I know this feeling of disappointment well.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8AC37HnjvF
— Did this happen to you too ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCkd5FTiBv
He seems surprised that I am interested in him and turns to me, burying his hands in the pockets of his pants.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL3ssdtjj7V
— To be betrayed, disappointed ? Oh yes ! Although I don't understand why your friends would turn their backs on you.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVTuJPpZQ9F
— Haven't you heard the gossip spread by Amy and Pearl ? They told everyone that I slept with Chad. Even though I told them that this is not the case, they did not believe me, and worse, they preferred to continue to denigrate me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9BGBcEGjtX
As I tell him this, I search his eyes to check if he is sincere or if he is making fun of me like the others.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGjE8tOis5m
— I have learned to no longer listen, and even less believe, what people say out of pure malice or jealousy. I am convinced that you are telling the truth.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD6AJsrtGfM
— You seem very sure of yourself for someone who doesn’t know me ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEACa5vBihj
He locks his gaze on mine before responding : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtsddp3TDeb
— I see in you.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTEOAwJ3iXE
This response leaves me speechless and upsets me more than it should. Faced with him, with his words, I feel lost. Fortunately, we arrived on my street and I just want to be alone to try to analyze what I feel.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMKTXLytjUc
— Thank you, I said, handing him back his jacket. And thank you for taking me home.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9b0aAjgEfm
— At your service, he says, turning left while I continue straight.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaAS0dUn56X
495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBkFLIkZjmz
495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQE640TmKZf
The following days, nothing erases this attraction which pushes me towards Jessy. This makes me feel so guilty that I try to focus on my relationship with Chad, without really succeeding. As for Jessy, I feel like he's been running away from me since the other night. He looks away as soon as I look at him and doesn't speak to me anymore. I don't know what I did wrong for him to ignore me like that, but it pains me a lot. Perhaps he also ended up believing the nonsense that was circulated about my relationship ? If that were the case, I would be extremely hurt.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwo9bKVtcH
It was during history class that the teacher gave me the opportunity to get closer to him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlb5oWCTe5p
— I asked each of you to write a presentation on the last lesson.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPD7qg6fVuW
At these words, several students point to their copy on their table.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgfu817wDE7
— Jessy, can you pick them up ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV1aYBNlAdy
This one executes. When he reaches my height, his gaze finally anchors on mine. I feel like seconds are becoming minutes. At this very moment, I realize how much I've missed Jessy these past few days. His hand brushes against mine as I hand him my paper, making me want to grab it and never let go.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP8MPo3A7jl
As if reading my thoughts, Jessy narrows his eyes slightly and purses his lips. Then he turns away towards the next table, breaking the spell that united us as the professor continues speaking : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoWv5XTpCz6
— To find out what you have learned from this course, I have prepared a written quiz for you.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1b2VcPWQYV
Immediately, boos are heard.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlFV9ekKfiD
— Yes, I know, I'm not nice. While you answer the questionnaire, I will go through your presentations and form teams of two. For next week, you will have to refine your different points of view, compare them, in order to share them in front of the whole class.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOxT9Jf5NgP
Although I am a good student, I don't particularly enjoy being on the board in front of everyone else and am already worried about who I will have to work with. As long as it's neither with Amy nor with495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8v1uxMpGcH
Pearl. I haven't spoken to them since the party at Chad's.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXBl1SP6TIo
They tried to come see me on Monday but I totally ignored them. Even if I find myself alone most of the time, Chad does not share all of my classes, I prefer that to being poorly accompanied.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH5QHNDp89p
For long minutes, I put these thoughts aside to concentrate on the questioning.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe2i4F7Btdm
When I finish, I raise my head and look behind me, towards Jessy who finishes a few seconds after me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJzsI9MWknB
The teacher notices us because he tells us : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE70ECQqYiX
— Alright. Megan and Jessy, you'll be teaming up next week. You can go.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxR8KntLieC
At the same time, we get up and put our homework on the teacher's desk before leaving the classroom.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLI1280sqoS
I thought we were going to be able to discuss this project but already Jessy is quickly moving away.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPjNe2Y4VG2
— Jessy, wait ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGNJRFSLys2
He slows down, but doesn't stop.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGqqZkxfVZs
— We need to discuss how we are going to approach this presentation.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs4JwNY9Qop
His shoulders relax and he exhales.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsPNHxUYCzw
— I don't like working with others. So I suggest you do your part on your own, I will do the same and we will meet again before the next class to compare our points of view.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx7st12AS4a
— Thank you for your proposal but I refuse. There's no way I'm going to get a bad grade because you're antisocial.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGz5XNDVlFj
— I'm not…495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8kWcMjojrM
Before he finishes his sentence, I raise an eyebrow which interrupts him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8XQmSeQVWz
— Okay, maybe I am a little, he admits with a little smile. Alright, you win Megan.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDqfhkM7soX
Feeling like I need to take advantage of my advantage before he changes his mind, I quickly scribble my address on a piece of paper and hand it to him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgHtFdFZZfc
— Come to my place at the end of classes, we will be quiet to study.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNUYf02hvkU
— Thanks for the address but we could just as easily meet up after school and go to your house together.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIg2E2SkB9
Why didn't I think of that ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcBS7MZZALX
I refrain from slapping myself.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmaVWAbo9l
Embarrassed by my stupidity, I smile shyly. Jessy leans towards me, slips my address into his pocket and adds mischievously : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6bVWqQrvmO
— I'm keeping it anyway. You never know, you might get lost along the way.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡakTmLsAwz3
I don't understand why just looking at him, talking to him, puts me in this state. I feel my cheeks on fire and I am certain that when I open my mouth, nothing but nonsense comes out.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8BP4mtVbMW
But what is happening to me ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ApYVnKWPK
495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFwEuv8Fst
During the next class, I feel Chad's gaze, sitting at the desk next to mine, weighing on me suspiciously. I do my best to appear comfortable and innocent until he hands me a paper.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGASP1jsi2p
What's going on with Jessy ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1zoEJEGpO
Astonished, I wrote : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlxXg9mI2eZ
What ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMILST9nDL
Chad's response was quick : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmKBgYz7ezZ
Amy told me you two seem close and that I should be worried. It's the case ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgCyZZbLnXv
Anger replaces disbelief. What the hell is his problem ? Is she not tired of taking care of my life, of making up stories for me ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRCcVQWyee
No, not at all. We just have a presentation to make together. 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLPKdnBUcpZ
A smile lights up Chad's features. I managed to reassure him, yet I fear I may not have been completely honest with him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUQqZx6SyYE
As I look at his profile, I have to recognize that my boyfriend no longer inspires in me the feelings that inspired me just a few months ago. I feel myself detaching myself from Chad, I come to wonder if I was only in love with him one day or if I have always confused love and friendship. Slipping my hands through my hair, I breathe deeply. The only thing I know for sure is that I am lost in my emotions.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRYGH89IFRI
495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdRW5nxQTO1
495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡov6XyRatYW
At the end of class, Jessy comes to join me, backpack on his shoulder and a book in hand.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi4c77NU7IR
— I love this book. I must have read it about ten times since last year, he tells me. I thought you might like to read it ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTzNxmeutpY
While walking the streets, I quickly skim a few pages.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡakdb5V4DcT
— Do you mind if I save it to read tonight ? I'll give it back to you tomorrow.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrbeVrxMO1r
— On the contrary. It’s so rare that I meet people who like to read something other than comics.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡriZeJX1dh1
— I understand you. Comics are Chad's favorite reading.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMW2Un1iR9p
— I'm not surprised, Chad seems more of an athlete than a cerebral one.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4K9eqFkpsk
I am left speechless.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAgt36eFkwq
— Are you always this frank ? Can't help but ask him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5vShhHWwBW
He shrugs his shoulders while responding : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2TNhAzUPi1
— Very often. I hurt you ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3nem5A0ILS
I thought for a few seconds before answering him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvic9u5ukTc
— No. I must admit that it is the truth.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwb3h3fH76X
His smile widens, making me melt a little more.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbUTcBWtRc
Arriving home, we sit in the living room and chat about the homework we have handed in. We both think we'll get good grades. My mother comes home from work and walks into the living room, surprising us. I suddenly feel uncomfortable being with a boy other than Chad under my parents' roof. I jump up, followed by my guest.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrAmVZf4bq2
— Hey, Ch…, it’s not Chad, she smiled.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBXNIQdCOqR
— Mom, this is Jessy.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQNlVBNt1zc
They greet each other.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNLxfo1tEAk
— We have a presentation to give to the whole class about the Second World War.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMvbI2UJS0K
With a nod, Jessy confirms my words. Since my mother arrived, he hasn't said a word, and seems intimidated. This adds as evidence : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmiUB8Smlk5
— Jessy, are you staying to eat with us this evening ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUbOXgYxcjQ
He shrugs his shoulders.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFvDUSKGXMt
— I don't want to bother you…495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfTCayeE4Cj
— Don't worry, I still cook too much since Nick left for college.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdjS2whb8k0
— Nicolas is my older brother…495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtRuhPKftCU
— It would be a pleasure to have you with us. My husband is tired of being surrounded by girls.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDAhCz5F20
— Okay then, Jessy said, smiling. Thanks ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYVPsGcoBcA
A little later, he met my father, then Nina. When it was time to sit down at the table, without anyone telling her, Jessy naturally took a seat next to me. I control myself so as not to let my disorder appear in front of those close to me. I feel myself vibrate every time his arm brushes mine. From time to time, Jessy looks at me sideways and gives a little amused smile, and I immediately blush ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzNHwmTuLXT
The meal passes in a good atmosphere until Nina, as usual, says out loud what she is thinking : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxOEM5AxDc0
— You're not bad, Jessy, but I prefer Chad. It is awesome ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡibHOdfI42i
— Nina ! We don't say that kind of thing ! Reprimands my mother.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQeb8jQgFu
— For what ? I tell the truth.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8GGpVJM4p
— Chad is nice, Jessy responds politely.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx9x6EPxIh0
— And he’s strong ! Nina continues, making me want to throw myself over the table and strangle her.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ZXvJo89Du
— It’s true, Chad is a great athlete, adds my father. He also taught Megan how to drive. Considering the number of guests at his party the other night, he's also very popular. He has everything going for him, this boy, says my father, whom I would like to strangle at the same time as my sister.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡloZDE14mvU
— It’s true that he’s really lucky, Jessy whispers, looking at me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7nRACUNSHf
I stare at him, not knowing how to react. I have a sudden and insane desire to throw myself into his arms to kiss him, this idea scares me as much as his words made me happy. Also, I'm left speechless, which makes him smile more.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvMfE3BzcB4
At the end of the meal, Jessy helps me clear the table, then asks me where the bathroom is. I tell him. My mother then approaches me and gives me a little smile.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVdkbweju6W
— This boy is very nice, she comments quietly so that only I can hear. And very cute at that.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3dKRE41s2a
I glance at him sideways, smiling.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtwvuWGKA3t
"I suppose you know what you're doing ? "495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTIieAQNbjh
— Not really.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTFPdqZ60K
— Meg, you’re sixteen. You didn't make a lifelong commitment to Chad. You are all young, you have the right to be carefree. I was, at your age, and I didn't know your father until much later, when I decided to settle down.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9zili28yI7
— You know very well that I am too serious to let myself be guided by my emotions without having first thought for hours.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiftlMUxuop
— Yes, I know, my mother sighs. And at first glance, I would say that Jessy seems to be just like you.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpggQv0RqUZ
— You think that…495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjDUnMxdQAf
I want to ask her if she thinks Jessy is interested in me, but I leave it hanging when I see him coming back to us.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjjEcTZtAvF
— Thank you very much for inviting me to your table. It's getting late, I'm going to go home.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwUi0q8gD3
— Wait, I'm going to walk with you for a while.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNpJpTDzH8f
Jessy nods before going to grab his jacket hanging on a hook in the entryway.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfPE4l9HbsB
— Thanks again ! Have a good evening everyone, he says as he leaves.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4loiQvhWTK
— Megan ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWOJjBCityD
I turn to my mother who is standing in the hallway, at the entrance to the kitchen.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWxfUkJsKJd
— I am sure of it ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnBK2xUwmnl
I give him a big smile.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsViDffo4uQ
— She is sure of what ? Asks Jessy who heard everything from the porch.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT0xK4zBsfg
— Oh, you're welcome, just something I asked him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtnBRZeLW62
Fortunately, he doesn't insist.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKhF78UWRBB
We walk down the sidewalk in silence.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXa2Dv1XGu6
My neighborhood is a quiet place, where all the houses495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmcnPN1XlGh
look alike with their little white fence surrounding the garden. Only the colors of the houses vary from one to another, sometimes white with blue shutters, sometimes brown with red shutters. Our family home is cream with green shutters. My father makes a point of maintaining it well, repainting it as soon as the paint shows signs of age, and mowing the lawn regularly. This corner of the city is not known for being the richest, but at least its inhabitants ensure that nothing can damage it. I love this quiet little town which seems to live as if in a cocoon where nothing serious ever happens and where the smallest event, like the arrival of Jessy, is experienced as big news. This thought pulls me out of my reverie and, turning back to my companion, I decide to question him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJwTsIA7dCq
— Did you move here alone ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYMvePd7vAb
This seems incongruous to me since he is only seventeen, but I never see him with anyone, not even in town.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLObDrvcyab
— No, I live with my mother.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkJ5iIlWH6W
— And your father ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpLteDiU8LG
— My father died when I was a kid.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ1eiZ77FO2
— Sorry.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB7vSPlZpeI
— It's nothing. My mother remarried and I have a little brother, Jason, who is now seven.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoqsobHBfga
— So your father in law and your brother live with you ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBIBM7bbp5g
Jessy grimace. 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLp5bUcxG4r
— No, they stayed in Allentown.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksk4dBqPFE
— For what ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUM6tGV01ZO
Jessy gives me a big smile while answering : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvvdMEf6aNX
— Joker ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKWv3tecCC
Preferring not to insist, I move on to other questions : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjcLVRKaqUS
— Why did you leave Allentown ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7GPzyFcGS4
— Re joker ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZskG5IZkz4
— OK. I always see you alone... but you must have friends ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡokfu26mgLr
— You know, I just arrived and I don’t know anyone yet, except you. In Allentown, I had friends, or so I thought, but..., he interrupts himself, purses his lips, shaking his head : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEhGOXCdDXs
— I don't want to talk about it... Let's just say, sometimes you think you know people and you're wrong.
— Like me the other night...495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwbxeygE1fI
Looking serious, he nods.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIUbIE4hMjd
— So you’re from Allentown ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGry6MfVMsv
— Yes, I lived in a small neighborhood where everyone had known each other forever, a bit like this one. (He looks around.) Except that in town, we couldn't see the stars as well.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgVY8p9wiqD
I follow his gaze, staring at the sky illuminated by hundreds of sparkling points that no cloud hides. I feel very small and fragile in the face of this immensity. It's strange to find myself next to this boy to whom I feel close and who, at the same time, intimidates me so much.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcrUClqBTaX
— Your family loves Chad very much, he said suddenly, breaking this magical moment. How long have you been together ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM9LzEbjUk5
I sit on the low wall bordering a house for sale.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4IjuLOLZJ
— My father was a big athlete in high school and I think he recognizes himself in Chad. My mother finds him cute and nice, and my sister is in love with him, I think ! (I smile.) He and I have known each other for a very long time, since kindergarten in fact…495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYpRWegx1T
— And you’ve always loved him, Jessy adds, sitting down next to me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8PwraAqGhx
I blush and lower my head.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbluiwDO7LR
— It’s complicated… But let’s talk about you instead. Did you leave a girlfriend in Allentown ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbo4BTsEznG
Jessy turns to me and raises his eyebrows, visibly surprised. I stare at him, both impatient and dreading his answer.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRTX5sIoBhn
— Your question is strange...
— Why ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFmhOY0qhvE
— Because you're dating the perfect guy according to everyone around you, so I wonder what your questioning is hiding.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlnbXNGb8yY
— It wasn’t you who told me that you shouldn’t necessarily listen to what others say ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs43fZyS6oX
— Touché, he smiled. Let's say I had a girlfriend.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp2Jvp7t3HK
— You still have ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsmGWdGuP1H
— Well no, we split up...495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xUWg8xTuy
I don't give him time to finish his sentence as my lips are already on his. Immediately, he kisses me back.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzcc9qympk2
His lips are soft and warm on mine, I feel him slide a hand to my waist, pulling me closer to him until, as suddenly as it began, he pushes me back forcefully before standing up abruptly. jump, visibly annoyed.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGhRk4qq41u
— That’s not true ! Why did you do it ? He writes to himself while standing in front of me, hands on hips waiting for a response.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4KnudgD235
— I don’t know, I said as sincerely as possible. Since I met you, I have felt lost. I don't know why but I feel like I've known you forever and this feeling totally upsets me. I was hoping you felt the same way I did.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYmjpC2Fc2Q
Far from calming down, Jessy walks away from me, walking as quickly as he can. I get up and run after him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXySlvQi4p
— Jessy, wait ! What is happening ? Please don't tell me that kiss was that bad ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh90Y9BE9Cx
He doesn't stop though. I grab him by one arm, forcing him to stop his way.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQnjVgdEwZ
He glares at me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN89iYDpAsX
— I'm sorry if... I shouldn't have kissed you, but I honestly thought you wanted to too.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPirxziz4bp
— It is, he whispers, staring at me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlNM9rqzcm3
— So where is the problem ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV0KnHICHfm
— I can not do that.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpxtYVyi7oW
— But why ? I know that compared to Chad it's a bad thing but...495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI25D6GLepH
— It has nothing to do with him. The problem is me. I'm not made for love, he gets angry again. I gave too much, now that is forbidden to me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOH0kN2D4pk
He frees himself from my hand before continuing on his way. Staying there, I say to him : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7maCtPm6Pc
— I don't understand ! You can't pretend to want to kiss me and then run away like that a second later. It's not me who made you suffer so why should I pay for what others made you endure ? I'm not your ex ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7CcS1BqHFu
Abruptly, he stops his running, turns around before coming back towards me. His features are distorted by anger but I also read a form of pain there.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCIUPLiXGIW
— No, you are not the one who changed my life and I in no way wish to become the one who changes yours in the same way ! My life is ruined Meg, I'm already at the end. I'm going to die, he adds when he sees that I don't understand his words.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx3uo4zhv1B
— Wh... What ? I stammer, in shock.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOa54AUfZCB
He gets closer. His face is only a few centimeters from mine.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjh6XQsq2h
— Meg, I'm HIV positive. I have the AIDS virus, he admits quietly so that no one else can hear him, although the street is deserted. So stay away from me, believe me it's better ! 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBOFezJbH5h
He leaves as quickly as possible. Soon night envelops it completely. For a long moment, I stay there, dismayed, unable to make the slightest gesture, no longer knowing what to think. His words seem to spin in my head like a wild merry go round that no one can stop. I don't know how long I stand on that sidewalk looking in his direction long after he's gone.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnrKOWZqCih
495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3YeA9tsdm4
495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxOhAlcINjY
When I get home, I try not to let anything show and lock myself in the kitchen. I thought I would be safe, but as soon as I closed the door, my mother opened it and stuck her head in.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6gblU7RL0o
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're very pale, aren't you sick ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqON0FqEjE7
— Everything is fine. I miss Nicolas, I would like to talk to him.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKkKpA1pUZP
Understanding the message, my mother nods and closes the door behind her. Immediately, I grab the phone and dial my brother’s number. Luckily he answers after two rings.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYWcqP5kxsN
— Hello ? he says, happily.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk40f5eQQ0C
— Nick, it’s me.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0VdzwwCDeO
I'm having a hard time keeping the tremors in my voice at bay.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡls2DnYCNhe
— Meg, what’s going on ? He worries.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUpoFUsXuD2
The day I met Jessy, I told my brother that same evening. He seemed happy that a boy other than Chad was messing with me. For some reason, Nick always grimaced at my relationship with Chad. 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbopY7Oz1j7
— Jessy came to the house for dinner this evening... 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnqzCCP6kv3
— Oh, he sighs, he threw you away.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1w74P3oxrv
I think about the way I kissed him and feel myself blushing again. If I had known how he was going to push me away, I would never have let myself be carried away by my desire.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcg7Zf998g8
— Yes, but that’s not the worst, I sob. Jessy admitted to me that she was sick.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ35ArS99ZB8
Realizing the horror of the situation, I fall to the ground. I am not afraid of AIDS, I know that I risk nothing. But I am terrified for Jessy, for his future which is likely to be short. My brother doesn't speak, he gives me time to calm down. When my sobs dry up, I continue : 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBulzY6S3QI
— Jessy is HIV positive, I blurt out in one breath.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡllvOklpEHa
A gasp of surprise escapes my brother.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4iazhvp8rT
— Okay, he breathes, making me understand that he’s thinking about the situation. What are you going to do ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgayziwE4EM
— I don't know. Nick, I need to know your opinion.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ8j7Tppfg4
— I admit that I didn't expect that at all. Do you see yourself turning your back on him ? 495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJnGeLLlCA
— I wouldn't be able to.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhiDgSGyBjY
— Meg, I know this probably isn't the kind of relationship you imagined, but based on what you've told me so far about this guy, I think right now he especially needs support and friendship. Don’t reject him because he doesn’t match your ideal.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRzgeMeVOEl
— Exactly, he corresponds to my ideal and the fact that he is ill changes nothing. If I am devastated it is because AIDS is an incurable disease. I don't want him to die, Nick, I'm crying again.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeyZzyY2aCg
I am aware that I have only known him for a short time but, without being able to explain it, he has already marked my existence.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZ4B6xIE1y
— Come on, little sister, don’t cry. For now, Jessy is alive and, even if he keeps you at a distance, I'm sure he would be happy to have you in his life. Try to make him smile while he's here. He must need to think about something other than this crap.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ08USOKVqyi
— You're right. Nick, what I confided to you must absolutely remain between us. No one should know.495Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEo9OHiV7JE
— Finally you know me ! Come on now tell me how he dumped you ! He laughs as I bite my lip in shame.
