492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEp0I5vYnNs
492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRj5tjNY53s
For long minutes, I stroke Jessy's wet hair, trying to soothe his pain, his fears. When he straightens his face, he seems ashamed to have cried in my arms. Delicately, I wipe away his last tears, surprised that he lets me do it, and smile at him to reassure him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWM7VJID3NE
We set off on our way back in torrential rain, yet we walk peacefully, savoring the fact of being together. I don't care if it rains as long as I'm with him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcNx9UDQT8S
— Anyway, we're already soaked, I answer Jessy when he asks me if I want to run to get to his house faster. It'll be OK ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNIKKMksl7E
— Yeah, I think so.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCtsIuRC2Mb
— Jessy, please promise me you’ll never let yourself fall into the void like that again. I got the fright of my life.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ20XS2S4ESK
Hands in his pockets, he shrugs his shoulders and breathes deeply before telling me : 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYtpSSQBGQ5
— Promise. Why do you care about me so much ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmIsREaliZ
His question makes my heart beat faster. I'm not ready to tell him the feelings he inspires in me. I have to analyze them first and try to find out what he feels. So even though I feel my cheeks turning pink, I answer him evasively.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0WWzkuNJNQ
— Why not ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5OwFjLWRbZ
— When people learn about AIDS, they turn their backs on me. This is why my mother and I came to live here. Even my father-in-law couldn't stand me living under his roof anymore.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqRyZlpyN5c
— There are morons everywhere, I whisper. Jessy, I like you. I'm not going to start ignoring you because you have a health problem.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2yy1ccIaa
— Thank you, he murmurs, pursing his lips. I'm sorry for everything I said to you. I didn't mean to be so rude.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoS4qBC1hbe
His unexpected apology really makes me happy. When Jessy stops telling me off, I see in him the boy I had guessed at first glance : A good guy to whom difficult things happen. I think that's why he always tries to show an angry face, he has suffered so much that he doesn't want people to perceive his fragility.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgSlsZjt28R
— It's forgotten. By the way, I met your mother. She seems very nice.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcMLZEoOyvx
Despite our slow walk, we already arrive in front of his house.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMpHiLRuVri
— She is. Do you want me to take you home ? I can borrow his car.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKXGmOhC7FC
— No, it is going to be fine. I don't want to get the seats soggy, I smile. See you tomorrow ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPkDA6QX8c2
I am happy to see him nod with a big smile. And as I walk away, I realize I've never been closer to him than I am tonight.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0kCoiV7o28
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It's almost 11 p.m. when I get home, completely soaked. My parents are waiting for me, impatient and worried.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2dkI3dTNtf
— Finally, here you are, my father roared. Look at you, you're good at wringing ! 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ5wkkntOjP
— Were you with Jessy ? My mother asks in her usual soft voice.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBuQT8XoEQG
I nod, shivering from the cold.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0duRyrSoEb
— We spoke with Mrs. Sutter at the meeting. She told us that her son had been missing for hours and that she had no idea where he might be. She was very worried about him, my father told me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ls7BpPdoa
— He went back home. How did the meeting go ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYPBpQxvGnm
— Start by drying off, we'll tell you later.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4x9nVEAfp5
I head into the bathroom where I warm up quickly and quickly put on my pajamas, as well as a warm dressing gown, as I can't wait to see how the evening unfolds. I find my parents in the living room, where everyone, in an armchair, drinks coffee while waiting for me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkxFF9Ap4eO
— So how did it go ? I said, sitting across from them on the couch.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡraAAmb22UV
— Difficult to say, my father grimaces. The principal had asked a doctor to come and answer the parents' questions. It calmed some when he assured their children were not at risk of breathing the same air as Jessy or touching him. But other parents are obtuse and want him to be expelled at all costs. They are simply scared to death, to the point of not understanding that AIDS is not caught like that.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnjgXut4kWk
— Mrs. Sutter spoke, saying how much she loves her son and that there is no risk in sharing his life since she has been doing it for a year without problem, my mother added. She is a very dignified and courageous woman. She told us you came to see her.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTwnFOVH478
— Indeed, I was looking for Jessy.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu7QB7yWMpK
— Nina told us that you went looking for him after Chad’s visit. Did you find it ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3PgW7hnj9
— Yes, and as far as you know, it’s over between Chad and me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQorM0vHEX1
Contrary to what I thought, my father doesn't seem surprised. My mother must have already told him about it. However, I don't like the look they exchange before my mother asks me : 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgUuiqv1mE
— Because of Jessy ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAepzXnQ5x7
— Yes and no. Jessy and I are friends. But let’s say that meeting him allowed me to open my eyes to Chad and his little world. I realized that, contrary to what I believed, I am not in love with him. I like him a lot but in a friendly way.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuQEpTbaURF
Once again my parents exchange this strange look which seems to mean that they are not at the end of their trouble with me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcQ4LRy5vUK
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The next morning, when I arrived near the school, I saw Jessy waiting outside on the sidewalk.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpeIWZ0YUv9
— Hi, how are you ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTvh1FikKXc
He puts a hand to his heart.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGXtXMIx6Yx
— Oh, you scared me ! 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQwnxGj0M9r
I burst out laughing.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2hpdG7SCm
— That’s for the scare you gave me last night ! 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkPQNvjbNDz
— It’s fair game, he smiled.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoL8zaYbuaF
He stares at the large white building without taking a step towards it. Since I stayed in his arms the day before for several minutes, he no longer intimidates me as much, and this impression of knowing him for a long time has strengthened. I saw his fragility behind his anger, I saw his despair, but also his strength.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEwvt1FHF6
— Are you planning to come to class today ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLAYg5tvsB
— I don't know. After what happened yesterday...and then this meeting.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡML2d6Y7Vsm
He huffs and then purses his lips, visibly uncomfortable.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡITQkspq3ns
— Did your mother tell you ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZqfIwsDYMi
— Yes, apparently the parents can't do anything against me, but there is always the possibility that they will contact the academy and file a complaint to have me fired. In fact, I wonder if it wouldn't be better if I gave up... 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ljxE1NSEl
— No way ! 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKngrQvp906
Jessy looks at me, surprised.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAiqn29bIgO
— We'll go together and everything will go well, you'll see.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAUKMCd3bfx
— There are looks that are sometimes hard to bear, he admits to me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUw2ceaZur3
However, I notice that he accompanies me towards high school.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS1ihW5PbRI
— I believe that, unfortunately, you can never please everyone, so give a chance to know you to those who want it and forget the morons.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQYPeXRJXeF
We enter the main hallway, students turn to look at us as I continue talking so that he focuses more on my voice than on the eyes focused on him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcnhRKICAZP
— With time, there will be those who will realize who you really are and they will come to you, as for those who continue to criticize you, act as if they don't exist. They're the idiots, not you.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcjRQf0Sitn
I meet the gaze of a tall guy, named Tyler, who grimaces when he hears me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡERgMdkzBwa
— Yes, complete idiots, I said again in a louder voice.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvkhdVBG0vr
Jessy gives me a grateful smile.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMK7v7crB7X
— Oh, it’s getting bad, he murmurs.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ41QO6njRDl
I follow his gaze and see Chad striding towards us. He stands in front of Jessy and, after a few seconds of hesitation, offers his hand.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvLMcB1VcQH
— I'm sorry for yesterday. For the fight…and everything else. I should never have listened to your conversation and above all I should never have repeated his secret. I'm really sorry.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi2SwQ9iyOh
Jessy hesitates for a few seconds then squeezes his hand, nodding.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8iy9BHv0C
— Thanks.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKNgp5jM3X9
His eyes move from Jessy to me, he doesn't seem to know how to behave around me anymore.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡunKn7sz9p4
Around us, several students observe the scene. Chad is the most popular boy in school and I suspect that after this reconciling handshake, the attitude of some people will change.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpgm9ctotgl
He taps Jessy on the shoulder and says — See you later and walks away.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ969V8dhrDg
— It’s weird that Chad came to apologize. Did you ask him to do it ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD4oNiQZX6B
— No, he did it alone, but you know, he’s like that. He is impulsive, but quickly regrets his outbursts... I feel, more than I see, Jessy looking at me in profile.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3FBwcsQgxd
— What ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqz4KXeFS9R
I turn my head towards him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6p8p6FqRy5
— Why did you break up ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV9CtHkFQJI
— We are too different.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeXMIf2cKZW
I shrug my shoulders as if it were obvious.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5wZ7BvThNW
— And are you okay ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡamHy4fv6la
I see in his eyes that he really cares about me, it warms my heart.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4igLqq3f8l
— Alright.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvhMAB5xoxg
A small smile appears at the corners of his lips.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb7Yrb9XJmd
— I know you don't like Chad very much, but erase that little smug look. (I smile in turn as the bell rings for the start of classes.) We're going to be late, come on.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8b7Z1LCAP1
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492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7dhvtZqt9
In the days that followed, things calmed down at the school. I can't say that Jessy goes unnoticed, but he is seen less as an outcast, which is already a small victory. At school, I was always the model student, collecting good grades. The super serious girl who has the teachers on her side. When I dated Chad, who is the most popular guy, I became popular and other girls tended to take their cues from me. So, even if there are a few who look away and whisper as she passes, most of the students are starting to accept Jessy. Since the evening on the bridge, we have spent a lot of time together. I prefer to be with him rather than with my pseudo friends : Pearl and especially Amy, who has turned her back on me since Chad and I separated.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPdbKDm62o5
Jessy has become my best friend. I can talk to him about everything without being afraid that he will judge me; however, he always gives me his honest opinion.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJtCuSpdixj
Jessy lived surrounded by family and friends before learning of his HIV status, but he told me that when those close to him learned of his illness, everyone turned their backs on him and, overnight, he found himself abandoned. Only his mother remained near him. By moving to Millisky where Mrs. Sutter found a job as a secretary in a bank, she hoped that her son would finally be able to return to a normal life.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGB0uU4gmsO
The more I get to know him and the less I want this solitary life for him, it's like a kind of mission that I have set for myself. I may not be able to save him, but I can make him smile again. Also, I force him to accompany me to the cinema, to the theater, to fast food. Jessy complains, protests, sometimes drags his feet, but in the end, I always make him give in.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2zZNAGt68c
— You've lived locked up enough like that ! » is my key phrase to convince him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdoYWrCjIkF
He then rolls his eyes, huffing in exasperation while his cross— shaped earring swings to the rhythm of his breathing. Finally, he looks at me with a little smile which alone symbolizes my victory.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbywsIYLN84
I am myself with him. We have a lot of tastes in common, we laugh at the same jokes, we talk about everything and nothing without ever getting tired of it. And when I'm not with him, he haunts my mind. He is the first person I think of in the morning when I wake up and the last in the evening before I go to sleep. In a few weeks, it has invaded my life and I hope more than anything that it continues as long as possible.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy3ajZYrCTP
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— Hello Mrs. Sutter, are you well ? I say happily as I enter the living room, accompanied by Jessy.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNuhbncwIYT
Over the past few weeks, I've been spending so much time at the Sutters' that it feels like my second home. I really like Jessy's mother. Just by his look, we perceive his kindness and his strength. I am always welcome at their home and even though Jessy can come to my house whenever he wants, I understand that he is more comfortable in his environment.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLI7MbdEbBi
— Good Meg and you ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8IStErcX5
— I’m fine.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡED3ObnjZ5I
Elise gets up while Jessy goes to turn on the television.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlOjzJvfYjN
— What movie are you going to watch ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpgV16Z6N46
— Ghost ! With a big smile, I show the video tape I brought, asking him : Are you staying to watch it with us ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8koFOByh3q
— Unfortunately, I can't. I have not finished completing a loan application for a client. I’m going to go lock myself in my room with this file, she sighs.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwHUdR4c1F2
— Good luck, Mrs Sutter. 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd46P7Qn0lU
She takes a few steps away before turning back to me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK4FIyzTdWc
— Meg, for the hundredth time, call me Elise.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7jP6TdKDD2
— I'll try, I promise.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsTy9j85OBM
His mother leaves the room, leaving us alone.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbqeI3clZS
— Pop corn ? Jessy asks me. I only have salty, I don't like sweet.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8YaBvaug0H
— That suits me very well.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKxFS5z9Jj
Once the popcorn is in a large bowl, we sit on the sofa in front of the television. Almost two hours later, I overcame my fear that he would send me away for daring to lean my head on Jessy's shoulder. To my great relief, he just smiled as he continued to watch the film. Now that it is ending, I can no longer contain my emotion and shed many tears.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg9SgL9IV0m
— Don’t make fun, I said, seeing him laugh discreetly.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBBfojulxs
I stand up and stretch before wiping my eyes.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBjCfnuzfVO
— Patrick Swayze is too sexy, I comment.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyvo2jlrl2d
— Demi Moore is not to be outdone, he sighs, lowering his head.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkeIt3bm4Vu
He suddenly seems sad, which worries me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZf1GEvMw1K
— Isn't that okay ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQiq5K9U4lV
— Yes, it’s just that… Do you believe that the afterlife exists ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2GbxWLOgJk
Still sitting on the couch, I turn to him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsKL1BL19Nb
— I think yes. However, I don't know if it's like in this movie.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVPx8iK5uJz
He adopts the same position as me, we find ourselves face to face.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ4eTjW6xsN
— If that’s the case, I’ll make sure to let you know when I get there.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA6hRYt9I0t
I wasn't expecting this response which took me completely by surprise. New uncontrollable tears flood my face. Reality suddenly reminds me. When I am with Jessy, I forget his illness because he is him, the boy I love with all my heart even if he knows nothing about my feelings. But there, faced with the virus, I find myself facing its imminent death. It’s a horrible thing that I try not to think about, as if that could prevent it from happening. I know this is stupid and despite all my efforts, AIDS still remains in the back of my mind. But hearing Jessy talk about his departure is upsetting. I would love to tell him that I am in love with him and that he has no right to leave me, ever. However, this is one of the subjects that I cannot discuss with him as I am sure that he would send me away again. He needs support, so I'm content to be his friend, secretly hoping that one day he'll realize that I mean more to him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuP8RoBNZTI
— What do you have ? He is surprised.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEUVASJi2vW
— I don't want you to die Jessy ! 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFv4IW7DVx
I burst into tears as I threw myself on his neck. Immediately, he hugs me back.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5vb5kmvBV3
— Don’t cry, he whispers in my ear. I don't like seeing you sad.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrobnmk9Vc
His heart beating wildly against my chest reminds me that he is still very much alive and that as long as that is the case, we must not lose hope.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgBbQoT6Bel
Staring at him, I detach myself from him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvMuuW21jMH
— You're going to fight to stay alive, aren't you ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡciSKNSzCQz
He strokes a lock of my hair that falls to the side of his face while observing me attentively. He seems to weigh the weight of his words.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9EiRuqklnh
Finally, he nods in agreement.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc87sVyMSQv
— I have confidence in the future and in medicine. They will find a cure, it’s just a matter of time, I resume with confidence.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhoBMYkKPwP
— Meg, we've already talked about this. You can't save me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszSnqpAJhn
He lowers his head but I have time to see his eyes fill with tears.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe0A5HvVmE5
— I know... For the moment, but I can keep hope, I smile, wiping away the last tears that linger on my cheeks.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTvUH6qNoUE
Mrs. Sutter enters the room at this moment, breaking our moment of complicity.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6AlS4wTSf1
— Megan, are you crying ? She worries, looking at us in turn. And you too ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlHOd1NS2fN
Jessy and I exchange a look before bursting out laughing under the surprised gaze of Elise.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxX3LbOQrQG
— I’m going to go home, I announce, leaving the sofa.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiqmojl753F
— I'll take you back.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4FXKEBLUxJ
— No, it is going to be fine. I need to get some fresh air.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAXLtHb08A9
Above all, I need to expel from my body this disorder that I am trying to control, and also to silence my fears about its future. Kindly, he will get me my coat. After putting it on, I turn to him and take him in my arms. For a few more seconds, I want to feel him against me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLT2OrLiz5W
— Do me a favor, hold on to life, I whisper in his ear.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKdoN3bytpo
Emu, he acquiesced.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡime7yXFdME
When I leave the warmth of his arms, I see Elise watching us from the kitchen, she wears a little knowing smile, which makes me understand that she knows perfectly well how I feel about her son.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA6FktWhcq5
— Good night, see you tomorrow ! I throw before going out.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQbEzkP6tLK
I take a few steps while staring at the dark sky, inside I promise myself to do everything to save Jessy's life.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgPnE1bK3aB
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Since Jessy stubbornly refuses to tell me about his virus, during the days that follow, I go around bookstores looking for medical journals. At that time, when AIDS was terrifying the population, I had hoped to learn more, unfortunately the articles were still rare and the possible treatments even more so. Everyone repeats the instructions to follow in order not to be contaminated but none of them informs me about the solutions to overcome this cursed disease.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM4hn0cB0zO
— What is all this ? My mother asks me when I return home, my arms full of magazines and books.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡExTFvaKrpJ
— I'm finding out about AIDS, I admit, placing my load on the kitchen table.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZsfqbkGwvO
— Meg, I know you care about Jessy but... Don't waste your life for him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgqLJVimyzc
My mother's words felt like a stab to the heart.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRc8KQUmPn
— That's not what I meant, she continues, realizing my fear.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxRjwmEHCz
Hand on her forehead, she shakes her head as I grab my books again, determined to put an end to this discussion.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4R7Xa3dnnh
— Megan, you are 16 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFnzEz2lmHF
— And not Jessy, right ? ! I get angry.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRN14qukC5
My mother looks down.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIpXWoxpmql
— That's not what I said. I just think you're too young to have all these worries. You should be able to enjoy your teenage years completely carefree.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYmK3s2oxyp
— I would have liked it too, Mom, believe me I would have preferred that Jessy wasn’t sick. But he is and if I can help him in any way I will be there for him. I realize there's not much I can do, however, maybe one of these books will talk about a treatment and I can tell Jessy about it.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6iHiQTYVpU
My mother nods weakly.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWCKI970TWR
— I just ask you to be careful. Don't get too involved.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡheGn3JU5AL
— It's already too late for that, I emphasize. If it was Dad who was sick, wouldn't you do what you could to help him ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc5VKgX2lag
I turn on my heel, ready to leave the room when my mother asks me : 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlMIv5HDxAy
— You love him, don’t you ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyCabT6hk4c
I don't answer. I lock my gaze on my mother's, trying to make her understand all the feelings that are inside me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLPkkZqzP7s
— Please don’t tell Jessy about these books, I ask her before going out.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSI5uklAkye
492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVVJTtGUqXR
492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXB7JQsRjLf
— Good evening, Megan, Mrs. Sutter calls me from the kitchen when I arrive at their house.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2A6oxKSP8
— Good evening.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAutMGsCZwx
— Jessy hasn’t come home yet.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmwb4elmvq
I look up at his mother with worried eyes. It's 8 p.m., classes ended several hours ago.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxdIcNCLWYv
— Don’t worry, she reassures me. You know that his doctor advised him to go to the AIDS center, there was a meeting this evening. He had no desire to go, but I think it will do him good to talk to people who are going through the same thing as him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0X5We8we1G
— Did he leave there complaining ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmc07karRPH
— You know him well enough to know that he complains a lot, she said, smiling.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡih2LuZAl4i
— When he is with me, he is rather...492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNF8sO7Rd9
Hearing the front door open, I don't finish my sentence.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4dq8Eu5JBA
— Yes, but you are special to him, Elise whispers to me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZeX8uJA0Jz
I remain speechless, wondering what she means by that.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBPPeusZ7pe
— Sorry to be late.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCHAGrTneB
Jessy's face is tense, he seems upset. The evening could be long if he remains in this state of mind.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsxJl5NF2Ci
— How was it ? His mother immediately questions him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWOtk83EsFK
Jessy glances at me quickly before responding coldly : 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiaDKPIL1Pf
— I don't want to talk about it.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ao2pgE0CV
Mrs. Sutter looks at us in turn before announcing that she is going to watch television in her room so that we can watch the screen in the living room. Jessy walks around the bar and goes to help herself to some fruit juice.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs0cp9MQ91B
— You want some ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUf9IXkGDjf
His tone is less cold, but still full of anger that he tries to contain.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpHBZTE78R6
— Yes, thanks.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3VU9QE8R5I
He purses his lips before asking me : 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs0hdRj5WKr
— What movie did you bring this evening ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU5cPFLtKBJ
The week before, I had brought the filmGhost which caused us both to end up in tears. This time, I chose to take a lighter one, but still with my favorite actor. Proudly, I take the video tape out of my backpack and show it to him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyLPfMhdZL6
— Dirty Dancing ! 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAx8qla2lAs
He rolls his eyes, but I sense that he is holding back a smile.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwHRb3eGx94
— You and your Patrick Swayze ! I know you think he's the most handsome guy in the world, but your obsession with him is starting to turn into an obsession.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6nYLY4la9N
I pretend to look shocked, which makes him laugh.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwLNY0ThorY
— It’s true that he’s hot, but in my ranking of the most handsome guys, he only occupies second place.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeEojGZzh5b
— Oh, my God, he whispers with a hint of despair. Which other actor are you planning to pester me with when you're done making me watch all his films ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBAu1vtLraL
Jessy sighs, making a face. His good mood has returned, which makes me happy. I don't want to ask him about the meeting; If he wants to talk to me about it, he will do it alone. I just want to take his mind off things and see him smile. I get up to turn on the VCR while he puts away the bottle of orange juice.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGm260yV2g8
— No others, I promise. For me, the hottest guy isn't an actor.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDufUanPI0z
— Ah good ? Who is it ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeeytrFJjDc
He comes to join me on the sofa, frowning.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX98XC2AZh1
— He’s someone I see every day.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1lz4yF3hzw
The movie starts and I shut up. Out of the corner of my eye, I see my friend racking his brain to figure out who I'm talking about.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86zWUwBd8n
— Your father ? he asks after a few minutes.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQSdpLD8szZ
Without taking my eyes off the screen, I shake my head and smile. It amuses me to see him searching.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjWwsgoHKiw
— Someone from high school ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ754ayEyW58
J'acquiesce492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Ot5qgM3Xf
— Chad ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCEMacelEMt
A hint of anger and disbelief filters into his voice.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5E6VCQjwlV
— No. Jessy, do you want to watch the movie or tell me all the names of the guys at school ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw5AOKs825u
— Sorry, but no matter how hard I look, I can’t see who…492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtu8ksJQwyk
— It's you.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5smgbGQoeH
I didn't mean to tell him, it just came out, and now I feel myself blushing as I keep my eyes glued to the television. The words have barely passed my lips before Jessy chokes on swallowing and starts coughing. He gets up to go drink some water.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRQVkXkXiiV
— Well, that makes you feel, I said mockingly, pausing the movie.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMZ8kniX798
— You got me, he says from the kitchen.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoL4XXi62eI
I turn around on the couch to look at him.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnOqYsrzGke
— It’s the truth, Jessy, I’m not making you walk.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTt3Qu7lKFX
He comes back to sit next to me on the sofa. His cheeks are red as he places a kiss on my forehead.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzhys4PTZD4
— It’s nice of you to try to cheer me up. I love you.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh2vXqvRAEd
That's not what I'm trying to do, I really mean it, yet my heart immediately races : he adores me. 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrpoKoYkRqt
— Is it true ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlsKLrnh9am
— Of course. You're my best friend, Meg.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIPvCA1NVsL
Oh… Friend ? My heart calms down quickly.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzl2iVa2Y3W
— Aren’t you in good spirits ? Is it because of the meeting ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxAzKGkt9u
Your mother told me about it, I add in front of his frown.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE6RQ9YtKR6
— Yeah… it was depressing. Hearing all these patients talk about their fears… it brought me back to my own.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeVLPodDpo5
— Did you speak with them ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD2uuu7AT54
— No, I listened to them. It’s strange to arrive in this center where I don’t know anyone and where they invite me to confide.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH09BvqfxFp
— If you want, next time, can I accompany you ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VxJD4hx0z
I suggest, but I already know the answer.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5bYYcjS9Qo
— Non ! 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEaumhgS3TB
His tone is harsher than I thought. However, he softens very quickly.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQL0hV0Jjwl
— That’s nice, but no. I don't want you to come into this part of my life.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgjlG6KhX27
— For what ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCYRvDkums
Anger reappears in his eyes, he lowers his head.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFFM6CN3cwS
— Because you are too important to me for me to drag you into this world of illness with me.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTJcBdXX53
— Jessy… 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Sjp6YMttt
— No, Meg. I'm willing to give in when you force my hand to leave this house, but when it comes to AIDS, I won't change my mind, he said firmly, turning his gaze back to the television.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCEq8b2Ief
— OK as you want.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ17PdTkqMc6
I sigh as he resumes playing the movie. After a few minutes of silence, he glances at me and whispers : 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6EKlasoxsJ
— Are you mad at me ? 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ZHY1BdOSi
I can't help but smile and lean my head on his shoulder like I've gotten used to doing when we watch movies together.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTHLN18RuUO
— No, it’s your choice.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt6TkpUaP1a
He places another kiss on my forehead. I whisper to him without taking my eyes off Patrick Swayze : 492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0U2w4s7vB
— Me too, I like you.492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEFrPY0HUMG
492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcYSQR3qozv
492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXcPEQGCRpl
492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFrRk5onBhD
492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRKzvnXN6o
492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRUy32D05UH
492Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ98m0SThBqU
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