494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ68CwL0UtTg
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For long minutes, I stroke Jessy's wet hair, trying to soothe his pain, his fears. When he straightens his face, he seems ashamed to have cried in my arms. Delicately, I wipe away his last tears, surprised that he lets me do it, and smile at him to reassure him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo02oeQj1Rw
We set off on our way back in torrential rain, yet we walk peacefully, savoring the fact of being together. I don't care if it rains as long as I'm with him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv9CkLtkCkC
— Anyway, we're already soaked, I answer Jessy when he asks me if I want to run to get to his house faster. It'll be OK ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzHtwtTrlvr
— Yeah, I think so.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzAZlU570CR
— Jessy, please promise me you’ll never let yourself fall into the void like that again. I got the fright of my life.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoMGyttkCj1
Hands in his pockets, he shrugs his shoulders and breathes deeply before telling me : 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkmblWeUiBn
— Promise. Why do you care about me so much ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3uGA8yx5m
His question makes my heart beat faster. I'm not ready to tell him the feelings he inspires in me. I have to analyze them first and try to find out what he feels. So even though I feel my cheeks turning pink, I answer him evasively.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjLKviAIPD
— Why not ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9QQOejf2uT
— When people learn about AIDS, they turn their backs on me. This is why my mother and I came to live here. Even my father-in-law couldn't stand me living under his roof anymore.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ58zwdE6hp3
— There are morons everywhere, I whisper. Jessy, I like you. I'm not going to start ignoring you because you have a health problem.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDUnd1byrOK
— Thank you, he murmurs, pursing his lips. I'm sorry for everything I said to you. I didn't mean to be so rude.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNHzuHRzpCM
His unexpected apology really makes me happy. When Jessy stops telling me off, I see in him the boy I had guessed at first glance : A good guy to whom difficult things happen. I think that's why he always tries to show an angry face, he has suffered so much that he doesn't want people to perceive his fragility.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHqFnXoqIWS
— It's forgotten. By the way, I met your mother. She seems very nice.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHs03EQpHa3
Despite our slow walk, we already arrive in front of his house.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBXngmOn4Z4
— She is. Do you want me to take you home ? I can borrow his car.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVupUurDEi4
— No, it is going to be fine. I don't want to get the seats soggy, I smile. See you tomorrow ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3yOeqjwZB2
I am happy to see him nod with a big smile. And as I walk away, I realize I've never been closer to him than I am tonight.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbVjVn7LJq
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It's almost 11 p.m. when I get home, completely soaked. My parents are waiting for me, impatient and worried.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5s4IEVrdKU
— Finally, here you are, my father roared. Look at you, you're good at wringing ! 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJl3TijXxSD
— Were you with Jessy ? My mother asks in her usual soft voice.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQrNAE0Ov8f
I nod, shivering from the cold.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk87Z9PVHqA
— We spoke with Mrs. Sutter at the meeting. She told us that her son had been missing for hours and that she had no idea where he might be. She was very worried about him, my father told me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh4BKp2FGSL
— He went back home. How did the meeting go ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRmYl2K0jtk
— Start by drying off, we'll tell you later.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwxJhHkuda3
I head into the bathroom where I warm up quickly and quickly put on my pajamas, as well as a warm dressing gown, as I can't wait to see how the evening unfolds. I find my parents in the living room, where everyone, in an armchair, drinks coffee while waiting for me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwKwbKxgWhJ
— So how did it go ? I said, sitting across from them on the couch.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwIEBsK63a9
— Difficult to say, my father grimaces. The principal had asked a doctor to come and answer the parents' questions. It calmed some when he assured their children were not at risk of breathing the same air as Jessy or touching him. But other parents are obtuse and want him to be expelled at all costs. They are simply scared to death, to the point of not understanding that AIDS is not caught like that.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnuYmw5OwFs
— Mrs. Sutter spoke, saying how much she loves her son and that there is no risk in sharing his life since she has been doing it for a year without problem, my mother added. She is a very dignified and courageous woman. She told us you came to see her.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPUHLKNsTXi
— Indeed, I was looking for Jessy.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqnPVtEr7bu
— Nina told us that you went looking for him after Chad’s visit. Did you find it ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmZ00rAOBfK
— Yes, and as far as you know, it’s over between Chad and me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA3gOlbUvan
Contrary to what I thought, my father doesn't seem surprised. My mother must have already told him about it. However, I don't like the look they exchange before my mother asks me : 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRGWcK2YNoX
— Because of Jessy ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs7mVrGTBWn
— Yes and no. Jessy and I are friends. But let’s say that meeting him allowed me to open my eyes to Chad and his little world. I realized that, contrary to what I believed, I am not in love with him. I like him a lot but in a friendly way.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0VoMMqTRye
Once again my parents exchange this strange look which seems to mean that they are not at the end of their trouble with me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcDTpIQQFj3
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The next morning, when I arrived near the school, I saw Jessy waiting outside on the sidewalk.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHSry57r3qn
— Hi, how are you ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ3vGZOs3bk
He puts a hand to his heart.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2WJgCi8Pug
— Oh, you scared me ! 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1wW29Jp1lG
I burst out laughing.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9rRihHVsn
— That’s for the scare you gave me last night ! 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB5rUdj6YAx
— It’s fair game, he smiled.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo6ZylI7gxV
He stares at the large white building without taking a step towards it. Since I stayed in his arms the day before for several minutes, he no longer intimidates me as much, and this impression of knowing him for a long time has strengthened. I saw his fragility behind his anger, I saw his despair, but also his strength.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmBw3Uzal3D
— Are you planning to come to class today ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhSQw3ZNk8N
— I don't know. After what happened yesterday...and then this meeting.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeQcRCGgoj4
He huffs and then purses his lips, visibly uncomfortable.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPvGAK9LjOj
— Did your mother tell you ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxcm2qmsxz
— Yes, apparently the parents can't do anything against me, but there is always the possibility that they will contact the academy and file a complaint to have me fired. In fact, I wonder if it wouldn't be better if I gave up... 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2o50iSaJe5
— No way ! 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiWCP6112Ic
Jessy looks at me, surprised.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXbu5ZMHb5i
— We'll go together and everything will go well, you'll see.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBqKPL5pM8C
— There are looks that are sometimes hard to bear, he admits to me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPYbPrWzLat
However, I notice that he accompanies me towards high school.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvF04WrROqM
— I believe that, unfortunately, you can never please everyone, so give a chance to know you to those who want it and forget the morons.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡya0WaI6zf4
We enter the main hallway, students turn to look at us as I continue talking so that he focuses more on my voice than on the eyes focused on him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKXUBRmZXPt
— With time, there will be those who will realize who you really are and they will come to you, as for those who continue to criticize you, act as if they don't exist. They're the idiots, not you.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3thFtlsLXd
I meet the gaze of a tall guy, named Tyler, who grimaces when he hears me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIQBjyNc8ZU
— Yes, complete idiots, I said again in a louder voice.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAcJ3oUFIZC
Jessy gives me a grateful smile.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEGCn18pnU
— Oh, it’s getting bad, he murmurs.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEod5cZjvgL
I follow his gaze and see Chad striding towards us. He stands in front of Jessy and, after a few seconds of hesitation, offers his hand.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpSlYPf4uO9
— I'm sorry for yesterday. For the fight…and everything else. I should never have listened to your conversation and above all I should never have repeated his secret. I'm really sorry.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz4qd337ZKG
Jessy hesitates for a few seconds then squeezes his hand, nodding.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlc6vIG436U
— Thanks.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRZnq0ghMlO
His eyes move from Jessy to me, he doesn't seem to know how to behave around me anymore.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJul4XmAOel
Around us, several students observe the scene. Chad is the most popular boy in school and I suspect that after this reconciling handshake, the attitude of some people will change.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFUfgJe6iW2
He taps Jessy on the shoulder and says — See you later and walks away.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaHTsOwF058
— It’s weird that Chad came to apologize. Did you ask him to do it ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJg81q24CRB
— No, he did it alone, but you know, he’s like that. He is impulsive, but quickly regrets his outbursts... I feel, more than I see, Jessy looking at me in profile.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvmv4ZgTP6B
— What ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMkd0gi0N0z
I turn my head towards him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21klqgcfNv
— Why did you break up ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGRAbEnMrsM
— We are too different.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqCF7FSEHTL
I shrug my shoulders as if it were obvious.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjzULr3724t
— And are you okay ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkjGWl6RpEZ
I see in his eyes that he really cares about me, it warms my heart.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRFrUTlwmNz
— Alright.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfLFOp4gZx
A small smile appears at the corners of his lips.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxFyg0IAqYk
— I know you don't like Chad very much, but erase that little smug look. (I smile in turn as the bell rings for the start of classes.) We're going to be late, come on.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBunr9vow1F
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In the days that followed, things calmed down at the school. I can't say that Jessy goes unnoticed, but he is seen less as an outcast, which is already a small victory. At school, I was always the model student, collecting good grades. The super serious girl who has the teachers on her side. When I dated Chad, who is the most popular guy, I became popular and other girls tended to take their cues from me. So, even if there are a few who look away and whisper as she passes, most of the students are starting to accept Jessy. Since the evening on the bridge, we have spent a lot of time together. I prefer to be with him rather than with my pseudo friends : Pearl and especially Amy, who has turned her back on me since Chad and I separated.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbaKac0LBcL
Jessy has become my best friend. I can talk to him about everything without being afraid that he will judge me; however, he always gives me his honest opinion.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCBpY5bPpqT
Jessy lived surrounded by family and friends before learning of his HIV status, but he told me that when those close to him learned of his illness, everyone turned their backs on him and, overnight, he found himself abandoned. Only his mother remained near him. By moving to Millisky where Mrs. Sutter found a job as a secretary in a bank, she hoped that her son would finally be able to return to a normal life.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRMISiB75r
The more I get to know him and the less I want this solitary life for him, it's like a kind of mission that I have set for myself. I may not be able to save him, but I can make him smile again. Also, I force him to accompany me to the cinema, to the theater, to fast food. Jessy complains, protests, sometimes drags his feet, but in the end, I always make him give in.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp9qcs1pTjO
— You've lived locked up enough like that ! » is my key phrase to convince him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ16PgLbyYmh
He then rolls his eyes, huffing in exasperation while his cross— shaped earring swings to the rhythm of his breathing. Finally, he looks at me with a little smile which alone symbolizes my victory.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqZVj9GkdSE
I am myself with him. We have a lot of tastes in common, we laugh at the same jokes, we talk about everything and nothing without ever getting tired of it. And when I'm not with him, he haunts my mind. He is the first person I think of in the morning when I wake up and the last in the evening before I go to sleep. In a few weeks, it has invaded my life and I hope more than anything that it continues as long as possible.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPh55KR4BoA
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— Hello Mrs. Sutter, are you well ? I say happily as I enter the living room, accompanied by Jessy.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡweOcOyboP9
Over the past few weeks, I've been spending so much time at the Sutters' that it feels like my second home. I really like Jessy's mother. Just by his look, we perceive his kindness and his strength. I am always welcome at their home and even though Jessy can come to my house whenever he wants, I understand that he is more comfortable in his environment.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tRo2GsHa9
— Good Meg and you ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuKrEzzPn0R
— I’m fine.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh6CEZoBq6t
Elise gets up while Jessy goes to turn on the television.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdh5mZNQZVR
— What movie are you going to watch ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl7tOLieOZM
— Ghost ! With a big smile, I show the video tape I brought, asking him : Are you staying to watch it with us ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmAH1fqQdck
— Unfortunately, I can't. I have not finished completing a loan application for a client. I’m going to go lock myself in my room with this file, she sighs.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIP13IZJfHj
— Good luck, Mrs Sutter. 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8OHBhp8ce
She takes a few steps away before turning back to me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZcivpGqzlQ
— Meg, for the hundredth time, call me Elise.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8M9XZgToiC
— I'll try, I promise.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhTi2HC23mn
His mother leaves the room, leaving us alone.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7DgsedznV5
— Pop corn ? Jessy asks me. I only have salty, I don't like sweet.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBWJl6UVRkK
— That suits me very well.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QTqGq5TM6
Once the popcorn is in a large bowl, we sit on the sofa in front of the television. Almost two hours later, I overcame my fear that he would send me away for daring to lean my head on Jessy's shoulder. To my great relief, he just smiled as he continued to watch the film. Now that it is ending, I can no longer contain my emotion and shed many tears.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡciPivWZRku
— Don’t make fun, I said, seeing him laugh discreetly.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYiZREBt5xu
I stand up and stretch before wiping my eyes.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFOOnxUS6jJ
— Patrick Swayze is too sexy, I comment.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvhkClhkja
— Demi Moore is not to be outdone, he sighs, lowering his head.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE5Tx1BOFLE
He suddenly seems sad, which worries me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkgZp41a2nY
— Isn't that okay ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrVAv2ODHfH
— Yes, it’s just that… Do you believe that the afterlife exists ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJC5Db3try
Still sitting on the couch, I turn to him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBeJwbQGGAI
— I think yes. However, I don't know if it's like in this movie.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf8VqgUWfVD
He adopts the same position as me, we find ourselves face to face.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR7YUJz287O
— If that’s the case, I’ll make sure to let you know when I get there.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY64HLhSEq1
I wasn't expecting this response which took me completely by surprise. New uncontrollable tears flood my face. Reality suddenly reminds me. When I am with Jessy, I forget his illness because he is him, the boy I love with all my heart even if he knows nothing about my feelings. But there, faced with the virus, I find myself facing its imminent death. It’s a horrible thing that I try not to think about, as if that could prevent it from happening. I know this is stupid and despite all my efforts, AIDS still remains in the back of my mind. But hearing Jessy talk about his departure is upsetting. I would love to tell him that I am in love with him and that he has no right to leave me, ever. However, this is one of the subjects that I cannot discuss with him as I am sure that he would send me away again. He needs support, so I'm content to be his friend, secretly hoping that one day he'll realize that I mean more to him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXxIQhyPGtF
— What do you have ? He is surprised.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZn5I93ClX
— I don't want you to die Jessy ! 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhP3YaRUfaO
I burst into tears as I threw myself on his neck. Immediately, he hugs me back.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡts6kRRqBJG
— Don’t cry, he whispers in my ear. I don't like seeing you sad.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkyk69bX2lo
His heart beating wildly against my chest reminds me that he is still very much alive and that as long as that is the case, we must not lose hope.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2DxAvM19NI
Staring at him, I detach myself from him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEgleFqObTS
— You're going to fight to stay alive, aren't you ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36UtyK2Yko
He strokes a lock of my hair that falls to the side of his face while observing me attentively. He seems to weigh the weight of his words.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIodxu271EA
Finally, he nods in agreement.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblo1PJoTVe
— I have confidence in the future and in medicine. They will find a cure, it’s just a matter of time, I resume with confidence.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSGVEvxDIJs
— Meg, we've already talked about this. You can't save me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy4jj3cZBUO
He lowers his head but I have time to see his eyes fill with tears.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO32S3RM2Gt
— I know... For the moment, but I can keep hope, I smile, wiping away the last tears that linger on my cheeks.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvagm07bKjU
Mrs. Sutter enters the room at this moment, breaking our moment of complicity.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSqDfcQJXRB
— Megan, are you crying ? She worries, looking at us in turn. And you too ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡezCpv3zKiQ
Jessy and I exchange a look before bursting out laughing under the surprised gaze of Elise.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtafcc9BbSx
— I’m going to go home, I announce, leaving the sofa.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGeJ6Zb9so7
— I'll take you back.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmDh19Zw4Wv
— No, it is going to be fine. I need to get some fresh air.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS4e8haWM8j
Above all, I need to expel from my body this disorder that I am trying to control, and also to silence my fears about its future. Kindly, he will get me my coat. After putting it on, I turn to him and take him in my arms. For a few more seconds, I want to feel him against me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqI4qTABDdQ
— Do me a favor, hold on to life, I whisper in his ear.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPnarpYlq3x
Emu, he acquiesced.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUMdJJ19zgt
When I leave the warmth of his arms, I see Elise watching us from the kitchen, she wears a little knowing smile, which makes me understand that she knows perfectly well how I feel about her son.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy307P3ADWd
— Good night, see you tomorrow ! I throw before going out.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCxGYuLoSg
I take a few steps while staring at the dark sky, inside I promise myself to do everything to save Jessy's life.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtZeNiNyPXJ
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Since Jessy stubbornly refuses to tell me about his virus, during the days that follow, I go around bookstores looking for medical journals. At that time, when AIDS was terrifying the population, I had hoped to learn more, unfortunately the articles were still rare and the possible treatments even more so. Everyone repeats the instructions to follow in order not to be contaminated but none of them informs me about the solutions to overcome this cursed disease.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5DR1gdFZb
— What is all this ? My mother asks me when I return home, my arms full of magazines and books.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY3hsGieiT5
— I'm finding out about AIDS, I admit, placing my load on the kitchen table.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDdKROsnYp
— Meg, I know you care about Jessy but... Don't waste your life for him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxtI7JA6QDv
My mother's words felt like a stab to the heart.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq0gYpcwnoH
— That's not what I meant, she continues, realizing my fear.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoEWFDhyLeC
Hand on her forehead, she shakes her head as I grab my books again, determined to put an end to this discussion.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ0qAc2K4nJ
— Megan, you are 16 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡto902CMuui
— And not Jessy, right ? ! I get angry.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcr2eu90711
My mother looks down.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2g6s7xg3Fj
— That's not what I said. I just think you're too young to have all these worries. You should be able to enjoy your teenage years completely carefree.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡitg4Sk8CAc
— I would have liked it too, Mom, believe me I would have preferred that Jessy wasn’t sick. But he is and if I can help him in any way I will be there for him. I realize there's not much I can do, however, maybe one of these books will talk about a treatment and I can tell Jessy about it.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5XaFQviAyZ
My mother nods weakly.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfnOQq7VA8Q
— I just ask you to be careful. Don't get too involved.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrshHAsml1
— It's already too late for that, I emphasize. If it was Dad who was sick, wouldn't you do what you could to help him ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwxqq9822Qu
I turn on my heel, ready to leave the room when my mother asks me : 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4RUYxePzMN
— You love him, don’t you ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxrxRWhzEfF
I don't answer. I lock my gaze on my mother's, trying to make her understand all the feelings that are inside me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ0u7HTsFWK
— Please don’t tell Jessy about these books, I ask her before going out.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoPcxkYe62Y
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡACOj7o0DVV
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrDRdRzMEJ4
— Good evening, Megan, Mrs. Sutter calls me from the kitchen when I arrive at their house.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIE32uWTzC
— Good evening.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkpkaT8EUMO
— Jessy hasn’t come home yet.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2aoOihMMef
I look up at his mother with worried eyes. It's 8 p.m., classes ended several hours ago.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMYREyPdUR3
— Don’t worry, she reassures me. You know that his doctor advised him to go to the AIDS center, there was a meeting this evening. He had no desire to go, but I think it will do him good to talk to people who are going through the same thing as him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe1bQ1uQcUB
— Did he leave there complaining ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡToJZdVQO2t
— You know him well enough to know that he complains a lot, she said, smiling.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ02lsFE6xnr
— When he is with me, he is rather...494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡno8rs5JNeL
Hearing the front door open, I don't finish my sentence.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvRICUsG295
— Yes, but you are special to him, Elise whispers to me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrW1lPyYBm9
I remain speechless, wondering what she means by that.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK3K3cfJl17
— Sorry to be late.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDv52cgamMV
Jessy's face is tense, he seems upset. The evening could be long if he remains in this state of mind.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCeThQHDbkU
— How was it ? His mother immediately questions him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZWkRPdRJI
Jessy glances at me quickly before responding coldly : 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGp8MK5yXxF
— I don't want to talk about it.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0AGlYmNnW4
Mrs. Sutter looks at us in turn before announcing that she is going to watch television in her room so that we can watch the screen in the living room. Jessy walks around the bar and goes to help herself to some fruit juice.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYmWZkJ8D6B
— You want some ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ48MWtzTyro
His tone is less cold, but still full of anger that he tries to contain.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbOEUNC8y3G
— Yes, thanks.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHY4gmKZzMf
He purses his lips before asking me : 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJhDa9sTd4
— What movie did you bring this evening ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgHhWuMPJ8g
The week before, I had brought the filmGhost which caused us both to end up in tears. This time, I chose to take a lighter one, but still with my favorite actor. Proudly, I take the video tape out of my backpack and show it to him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡthNTiXFnWC
— Dirty Dancing ! 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmrigUUnzVl
He rolls his eyes, but I sense that he is holding back a smile.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVDjVoGCAXM
— You and your Patrick Swayze ! I know you think he's the most handsome guy in the world, but your obsession with him is starting to turn into an obsession.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJwo1FlCwhQ
I pretend to look shocked, which makes him laugh.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Pue2hmE1P
— It’s true that he’s hot, but in my ranking of the most handsome guys, he only occupies second place.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9w4ut1Sroc
— Oh, my God, he whispers with a hint of despair. Which other actor are you planning to pester me with when you're done making me watch all his films ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlOr4CteOIB
Jessy sighs, making a face. His good mood has returned, which makes me happy. I don't want to ask him about the meeting; If he wants to talk to me about it, he will do it alone. I just want to take his mind off things and see him smile. I get up to turn on the VCR while he puts away the bottle of orange juice.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtspXvu7X6D
— No others, I promise. For me, the hottest guy isn't an actor.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbAoYS3chOt
— Ah good ? Who is it ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡva84xDEVS3
He comes to join me on the sofa, frowning.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYHQRkmFCsA
— He’s someone I see every day.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL7S99W5dz2
The movie starts and I shut up. Out of the corner of my eye, I see my friend racking his brain to figure out who I'm talking about.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCSWm2hBxCE
— Your father ? he asks after a few minutes.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn9P8Vr8CkX
Without taking my eyes off the screen, I shake my head and smile. It amuses me to see him searching.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ74IeJfSir2
— Someone from high school ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPO93IX0wzc
J'acquiesce494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG7Uzjyz5IZ
— Chad ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2AByNAGysW
A hint of anger and disbelief filters into his voice.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBkyi7dJhc4
— No. Jessy, do you want to watch the movie or tell me all the names of the guys at school ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLP0xf7Npw3
— Sorry, but no matter how hard I look, I can’t see who…494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMoJrHWd7vp
— It's you.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxD60WOlCu
I didn't mean to tell him, it just came out, and now I feel myself blushing as I keep my eyes glued to the television. The words have barely passed my lips before Jessy chokes on swallowing and starts coughing. He gets up to go drink some water.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyLKiFGvf7M
— Well, that makes you feel, I said mockingly, pausing the movie.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvs5S6sUmHM
— You got me, he says from the kitchen.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡstpe8TD5gV
I turn around on the couch to look at him.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtelBINyZK2
— It’s the truth, Jessy, I’m not making you walk.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmq6CdOMFg3
He comes back to sit next to me on the sofa. His cheeks are red as he places a kiss on my forehead.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRfVqeByF4s
— It’s nice of you to try to cheer me up. I love you.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZFGO610UMi
That's not what I'm trying to do, I really mean it, yet my heart immediately races : he adores me. 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5czTQm7sGV
— Is it true ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtuMfMl1JLY
— Of course. You're my best friend, Meg.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaUy9mxERoR
Oh… Friend ? My heart calms down quickly.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡATbuLhENaG
— Aren’t you in good spirits ? Is it because of the meeting ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWGNpPF8ckb
Your mother told me about it, I add in front of his frown.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51vIfXdJZ2
— Yeah… it was depressing. Hearing all these patients talk about their fears… it brought me back to my own.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnnBxskQZMK
— Did you speak with them ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTDol1l0iFd
— No, I listened to them. It’s strange to arrive in this center where I don’t know anyone and where they invite me to confide.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXHAXYhpnM
— If you want, next time, can I accompany you ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAPTfxpgId6
I suggest, but I already know the answer.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPyxiPICKFa
— Non ! 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWFmYzPXVhB
His tone is harsher than I thought. However, he softens very quickly.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWHEe5gjPJf
— That’s nice, but no. I don't want you to come into this part of my life.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLqJJLdZzSd
— For what ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW6W1uSUBZe
Anger reappears in his eyes, he lowers his head.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMY6zSYeVns
— Because you are too important to me for me to drag you into this world of illness with me.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeefFd2pPOW
— Jessy… 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ATCkOvEqK
— No, Meg. I'm willing to give in when you force my hand to leave this house, but when it comes to AIDS, I won't change my mind, he said firmly, turning his gaze back to the television.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡECVtm2aVa5
— OK as you want.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDvRRBMo0iY
I sigh as he resumes playing the movie. After a few minutes of silence, he glances at me and whispers : 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuRVyCotffp
— Are you mad at me ? 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ676Oytsy0l
I can't help but smile and lean my head on his shoulder like I've gotten used to doing when we watch movies together.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfftqB3x5Fv
— No, it’s your choice.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWoiycG6mvp
He places another kiss on my forehead. I whisper to him without taking my eyes off Patrick Swayze : 494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdWEL5SAoC
— Me too, I like you.494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR75Dz4LaqP
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡio0zznZMyp
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzDZHfAa26m
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDfQnTImjq1
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIlbqVYFtz
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa52MOsMbTb
494Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWaHV7ZJ6zk
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