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For long minutes, I stroke Jessy's wet hair, trying to soothe his pain, his fears. When he straightens his face, he seems ashamed to have cried in my arms. Delicately, I wipe away his last tears, surprised that he lets me do it, and smile at him to reassure him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cH7o2lwzD
We set off on our way back in torrential rain, yet we walk peacefully, savoring the fact of being together. I don't care if it rains as long as I'm with him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbmscJu0fbq
— Anyway, we're already soaked, I answer Jessy when he asks me if I want to run to get to his house faster. It'll be OK ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0LPUZbTgf
— Yeah, I think so.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm50uSzlKw4
— Jessy, please promise me you’ll never let yourself fall into the void like that again. I got the fright of my life.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLAZPurhPEW
Hands in his pockets, he shrugs his shoulders and breathes deeply before telling me : 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3dLd5rn9po
— Promise. Why do you care about me so much ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRjTMFHZEL
His question makes my heart beat faster. I'm not ready to tell him the feelings he inspires in me. I have to analyze them first and try to find out what he feels. So even though I feel my cheeks turning pink, I answer him evasively.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj1UW6v9a0n
— Why not ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQcYRChNVs6
— When people learn about AIDS, they turn their backs on me. This is why my mother and I came to live here. Even my father-in-law couldn't stand me living under his roof anymore.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI9zhdcdFXp
— There are morons everywhere, I whisper. Jessy, I like you. I'm not going to start ignoring you because you have a health problem.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiadNdKZAXr
— Thank you, he murmurs, pursing his lips. I'm sorry for everything I said to you. I didn't mean to be so rude.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdSE6LFHvGD
His unexpected apology really makes me happy. When Jessy stops telling me off, I see in him the boy I had guessed at first glance : A good guy to whom difficult things happen. I think that's why he always tries to show an angry face, he has suffered so much that he doesn't want people to perceive his fragility.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ8dlN81qqF
— It's forgotten. By the way, I met your mother. She seems very nice.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡms1714hx5I
Despite our slow walk, we already arrive in front of his house.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOLnUtHwFni
— She is. Do you want me to take you home ? I can borrow his car.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡalisYjcxML
— No, it is going to be fine. I don't want to get the seats soggy, I smile. See you tomorrow ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX15BRYhjIf
I am happy to see him nod with a big smile. And as I walk away, I realize I've never been closer to him than I am tonight.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSxcSaRGdU5
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It's almost 11 p.m. when I get home, completely soaked. My parents are waiting for me, impatient and worried.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbxTFmoRCtW
— Finally, here you are, my father roared. Look at you, you're good at wringing ! 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMM9gUSEzeP
— Were you with Jessy ? My mother asks in her usual soft voice.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrMGl6J96ZH
I nod, shivering from the cold.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡby9oe51he7
— We spoke with Mrs. Sutter at the meeting. She told us that her son had been missing for hours and that she had no idea where he might be. She was very worried about him, my father told me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlCwiJALcvh
— He went back home. How did the meeting go ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXgWLhGXUbK
— Start by drying off, we'll tell you later.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJQMsELnoN
I head into the bathroom where I warm up quickly and quickly put on my pajamas, as well as a warm dressing gown, as I can't wait to see how the evening unfolds. I find my parents in the living room, where everyone, in an armchair, drinks coffee while waiting for me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj2aNJ5b7Ka
— So how did it go ? I said, sitting across from them on the couch.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vPrHKEF2w
— Difficult to say, my father grimaces. The principal had asked a doctor to come and answer the parents' questions. It calmed some when he assured their children were not at risk of breathing the same air as Jessy or touching him. But other parents are obtuse and want him to be expelled at all costs. They are simply scared to death, to the point of not understanding that AIDS is not caught like that.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZGKgNGG3al
— Mrs. Sutter spoke, saying how much she loves her son and that there is no risk in sharing his life since she has been doing it for a year without problem, my mother added. She is a very dignified and courageous woman. She told us you came to see her.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEnKrgdOPCp
— Indeed, I was looking for Jessy.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuMcEmu7Hnj
— Nina told us that you went looking for him after Chad’s visit. Did you find it ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnDhXVF6cPn
— Yes, and as far as you know, it’s over between Chad and me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpHHZt5bNG
Contrary to what I thought, my father doesn't seem surprised. My mother must have already told him about it. However, I don't like the look they exchange before my mother asks me : 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAHAKAgEd1N
— Because of Jessy ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo0l2qmhR2q
— Yes and no. Jessy and I are friends. But let’s say that meeting him allowed me to open my eyes to Chad and his little world. I realized that, contrary to what I believed, I am not in love with him. I like him a lot but in a friendly way.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTOHDFt0e8n
Once again my parents exchange this strange look which seems to mean that they are not at the end of their trouble with me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDYZPDsfFfH
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The next morning, when I arrived near the school, I saw Jessy waiting outside on the sidewalk.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzoACzDmnZn
— Hi, how are you ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡstNwf8lT7l
He puts a hand to his heart.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQD7ZyBZffz
— Oh, you scared me ! 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwY1wmuas12
I burst out laughing.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqiqi002JcR
— That’s for the scare you gave me last night ! 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0zo5XiZAvW
— It’s fair game, he smiled.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ256H3CsrHj
He stares at the large white building without taking a step towards it. Since I stayed in his arms the day before for several minutes, he no longer intimidates me as much, and this impression of knowing him for a long time has strengthened. I saw his fragility behind his anger, I saw his despair, but also his strength.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPznXXcNz9S
— Are you planning to come to class today ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu6n0pZKnH1
— I don't know. After what happened yesterday...and then this meeting.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW1NLufXNnn
He huffs and then purses his lips, visibly uncomfortable.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6sSlJwnPP6
— Did your mother tell you ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdfV5jP0DWw
— Yes, apparently the parents can't do anything against me, but there is always the possibility that they will contact the academy and file a complaint to have me fired. In fact, I wonder if it wouldn't be better if I gave up... 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM1ayKI1aDX
— No way ! 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0TE8XqwYuy
Jessy looks at me, surprised.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0tV2MH6M6Y
— We'll go together and everything will go well, you'll see.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPkiVfYjPw4
— There are looks that are sometimes hard to bear, he admits to me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfQ1fP8C375
However, I notice that he accompanies me towards high school.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBPrmgBwhg
— I believe that, unfortunately, you can never please everyone, so give a chance to know you to those who want it and forget the morons.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI2DIz025p7
We enter the main hallway, students turn to look at us as I continue talking so that he focuses more on my voice than on the eyes focused on him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2KGWBbAK3h
— With time, there will be those who will realize who you really are and they will come to you, as for those who continue to criticize you, act as if they don't exist. They're the idiots, not you.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO0GLgeZihz
I meet the gaze of a tall guy, named Tyler, who grimaces when he hears me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡimVrIkgRQZ
— Yes, complete idiots, I said again in a louder voice.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06vGZMs94G
Jessy gives me a grateful smile.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIdb3oqUk6c
— Oh, it’s getting bad, he murmurs.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSkwQLomZD4
I follow his gaze and see Chad striding towards us. He stands in front of Jessy and, after a few seconds of hesitation, offers his hand.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkJFrYhwb0o
— I'm sorry for yesterday. For the fight…and everything else. I should never have listened to your conversation and above all I should never have repeated his secret. I'm really sorry.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dPkvscTWF
Jessy hesitates for a few seconds then squeezes his hand, nodding.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyJSJLHSnjs
— Thanks.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2TdSeKWUS
His eyes move from Jessy to me, he doesn't seem to know how to behave around me anymore.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPwmuen9Nl0
Around us, several students observe the scene. Chad is the most popular boy in school and I suspect that after this reconciling handshake, the attitude of some people will change.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtqycyOFWXl
He taps Jessy on the shoulder and says — See you later and walks away.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkKhtaT3i3b
— It’s weird that Chad came to apologize. Did you ask him to do it ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAax8b5gcWt
— No, he did it alone, but you know, he’s like that. He is impulsive, but quickly regrets his outbursts... I feel, more than I see, Jessy looking at me in profile.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqDjWU83gmn
— What ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0UJ1JrR3D1
I turn my head towards him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObRk4Tg9M8
— Why did you break up ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4rRXutP689
— We are too different.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQpaISCPPtI
I shrug my shoulders as if it were obvious.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcW3Bai0dKX
— And are you okay ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdBXlYUYCEp
I see in his eyes that he really cares about me, it warms my heart.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZN8gzDftjr
— Alright.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoUFZRbUy4D
A small smile appears at the corners of his lips.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyr8l3MAk4N
— I know you don't like Chad very much, but erase that little smug look. (I smile in turn as the bell rings for the start of classes.) We're going to be late, come on.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe5WaIEXdS6
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In the days that followed, things calmed down at the school. I can't say that Jessy goes unnoticed, but he is seen less as an outcast, which is already a small victory. At school, I was always the model student, collecting good grades. The super serious girl who has the teachers on her side. When I dated Chad, who is the most popular guy, I became popular and other girls tended to take their cues from me. So, even if there are a few who look away and whisper as she passes, most of the students are starting to accept Jessy. Since the evening on the bridge, we have spent a lot of time together. I prefer to be with him rather than with my pseudo friends : Pearl and especially Amy, who has turned her back on me since Chad and I separated.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM0avOHp8H9
Jessy has become my best friend. I can talk to him about everything without being afraid that he will judge me; however, he always gives me his honest opinion.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn699TpIGhC
Jessy lived surrounded by family and friends before learning of his HIV status, but he told me that when those close to him learned of his illness, everyone turned their backs on him and, overnight, he found himself abandoned. Only his mother remained near him. By moving to Millisky where Mrs. Sutter found a job as a secretary in a bank, she hoped that her son would finally be able to return to a normal life.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr8aUa3tYBv
The more I get to know him and the less I want this solitary life for him, it's like a kind of mission that I have set for myself. I may not be able to save him, but I can make him smile again. Also, I force him to accompany me to the cinema, to the theater, to fast food. Jessy complains, protests, sometimes drags his feet, but in the end, I always make him give in.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOIAarEJoAu
— You've lived locked up enough like that ! » is my key phrase to convince him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJtsI40cAsF
He then rolls his eyes, huffing in exasperation while his cross— shaped earring swings to the rhythm of his breathing. Finally, he looks at me with a little smile which alone symbolizes my victory.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc98040DJBh
I am myself with him. We have a lot of tastes in common, we laugh at the same jokes, we talk about everything and nothing without ever getting tired of it. And when I'm not with him, he haunts my mind. He is the first person I think of in the morning when I wake up and the last in the evening before I go to sleep. In a few weeks, it has invaded my life and I hope more than anything that it continues as long as possible.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWeVEyWtNgf
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— Hello Mrs. Sutter, are you well ? I say happily as I enter the living room, accompanied by Jessy.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWU9CYAu5w7
Over the past few weeks, I've been spending so much time at the Sutters' that it feels like my second home. I really like Jessy's mother. Just by his look, we perceive his kindness and his strength. I am always welcome at their home and even though Jessy can come to my house whenever he wants, I understand that he is more comfortable in his environment.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaKBda4lPTT
— Good Meg and you ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ87kMxygNzU
— I’m fine.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSeb1fKRiR2
Elise gets up while Jessy goes to turn on the television.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLfk3cQlwHS
— What movie are you going to watch ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKXMBc41dW4
— Ghost ! With a big smile, I show the video tape I brought, asking him : Are you staying to watch it with us ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7UvQ40EGc
— Unfortunately, I can't. I have not finished completing a loan application for a client. I’m going to go lock myself in my room with this file, she sighs.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJF954eX119
— Good luck, Mrs Sutter. 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYrlYEU1Idv
She takes a few steps away before turning back to me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKx8Q211AIz
— Meg, for the hundredth time, call me Elise.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnn7uPNzBN7
— I'll try, I promise.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWblq0MZ9IE
His mother leaves the room, leaving us alone.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BZ4GYdA86
— Pop corn ? Jessy asks me. I only have salty, I don't like sweet.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgknG7VikTx
— That suits me very well.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXFsIo9nLV5
Once the popcorn is in a large bowl, we sit on the sofa in front of the television. Almost two hours later, I overcame my fear that he would send me away for daring to lean my head on Jessy's shoulder. To my great relief, he just smiled as he continued to watch the film. Now that it is ending, I can no longer contain my emotion and shed many tears.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG7hqfQYJSd
— Don’t make fun, I said, seeing him laugh discreetly.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWKXt9ZmViQ
I stand up and stretch before wiping my eyes.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡep78YWPqMp
— Patrick Swayze is too sexy, I comment.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJLChUYW39s
— Demi Moore is not to be outdone, he sighs, lowering his head.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2UqGY68Pa
He suddenly seems sad, which worries me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8QzeHboCrE
— Isn't that okay ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdPZ7mkUhRH
— Yes, it’s just that… Do you believe that the afterlife exists ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHRzCYH9KxO
Still sitting on the couch, I turn to him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxJmB2YukLA
— I think yes. However, I don't know if it's like in this movie.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbg3cljf2JH
He adopts the same position as me, we find ourselves face to face.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvCpjk9aHc8
— If that’s the case, I’ll make sure to let you know when I get there.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFJMQTXii0q
I wasn't expecting this response which took me completely by surprise. New uncontrollable tears flood my face. Reality suddenly reminds me. When I am with Jessy, I forget his illness because he is him, the boy I love with all my heart even if he knows nothing about my feelings. But there, faced with the virus, I find myself facing its imminent death. It’s a horrible thing that I try not to think about, as if that could prevent it from happening. I know this is stupid and despite all my efforts, AIDS still remains in the back of my mind. But hearing Jessy talk about his departure is upsetting. I would love to tell him that I am in love with him and that he has no right to leave me, ever. However, this is one of the subjects that I cannot discuss with him as I am sure that he would send me away again. He needs support, so I'm content to be his friend, secretly hoping that one day he'll realize that I mean more to him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYcfqec0zZ9
— What do you have ? He is surprised.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiuJ7P6Re5l
— I don't want you to die Jessy ! 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkvp81j5coW
I burst into tears as I threw myself on his neck. Immediately, he hugs me back.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOldAEQqDTo
— Don’t cry, he whispers in my ear. I don't like seeing you sad.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Yyl6rFlQq
His heart beating wildly against my chest reminds me that he is still very much alive and that as long as that is the case, we must not lose hope.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ZptrtdXGL
Staring at him, I detach myself from him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZgPFtBje5v
— You're going to fight to stay alive, aren't you ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa35EPKgg6S
He strokes a lock of my hair that falls to the side of his face while observing me attentively. He seems to weigh the weight of his words.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwM2i4t4aar
Finally, he nods in agreement.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQXd83ywfAG
— I have confidence in the future and in medicine. They will find a cure, it’s just a matter of time, I resume with confidence.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuDjUGWWhDs
— Meg, we've already talked about this. You can't save me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCQ67Esgypa
He lowers his head but I have time to see his eyes fill with tears.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTI0UQfVu3v
— I know... For the moment, but I can keep hope, I smile, wiping away the last tears that linger on my cheeks.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡntfD4DyBle
Mrs. Sutter enters the room at this moment, breaking our moment of complicity.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVRm1P2BPLV
— Megan, are you crying ? She worries, looking at us in turn. And you too ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAfMl30Y1zb
Jessy and I exchange a look before bursting out laughing under the surprised gaze of Elise.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZDRn4xVPWE
— I’m going to go home, I announce, leaving the sofa.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWQhP0dVnkQ
— I'll take you back.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj1KGZenqRz
— No, it is going to be fine. I need to get some fresh air.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdOxeuy8nKn
Above all, I need to expel from my body this disorder that I am trying to control, and also to silence my fears about its future. Kindly, he will get me my coat. After putting it on, I turn to him and take him in my arms. For a few more seconds, I want to feel him against me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhpApteVcoZ
— Do me a favor, hold on to life, I whisper in his ear.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLm3MttnSEv
Emu, he acquiesced.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNzQIF0C0H6
When I leave the warmth of his arms, I see Elise watching us from the kitchen, she wears a little knowing smile, which makes me understand that she knows perfectly well how I feel about her son.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF9DlxqRSCL
— Good night, see you tomorrow ! I throw before going out.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZJRuFmwkph
I take a few steps while staring at the dark sky, inside I promise myself to do everything to save Jessy's life.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5dLzBozIt
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Since Jessy stubbornly refuses to tell me about his virus, during the days that follow, I go around bookstores looking for medical journals. At that time, when AIDS was terrifying the population, I had hoped to learn more, unfortunately the articles were still rare and the possible treatments even more so. Everyone repeats the instructions to follow in order not to be contaminated but none of them informs me about the solutions to overcome this cursed disease.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJLRElWhQH
— What is all this ? My mother asks me when I return home, my arms full of magazines and books.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSOuC2imKav
— I'm finding out about AIDS, I admit, placing my load on the kitchen table.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAV6w9wPcDs
— Meg, I know you care about Jessy but... Don't waste your life for him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl1N8HeO64z
My mother's words felt like a stab to the heart.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwawWoK5Tjh
— That's not what I meant, she continues, realizing my fear.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ10ahkLOpA
Hand on her forehead, she shakes her head as I grab my books again, determined to put an end to this discussion.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhmBhVTA0Iv
— Megan, you are 16 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0fwOEVFIW8
— And not Jessy, right ? ! I get angry.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXbRfITEwX1
My mother looks down.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmmyALUqKqN
— That's not what I said. I just think you're too young to have all these worries. You should be able to enjoy your teenage years completely carefree.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1mlzI8IVqf
— I would have liked it too, Mom, believe me I would have preferred that Jessy wasn’t sick. But he is and if I can help him in any way I will be there for him. I realize there's not much I can do, however, maybe one of these books will talk about a treatment and I can tell Jessy about it.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2fYQhILwI
My mother nods weakly.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGODmzw4sw
— I just ask you to be careful. Don't get too involved.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHON0tUmbzh
— It's already too late for that, I emphasize. If it was Dad who was sick, wouldn't you do what you could to help him ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMEkTS0ihf9
I turn on my heel, ready to leave the room when my mother asks me : 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVH6KQp35qe
— You love him, don’t you ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN5kPBQEzAY
I don't answer. I lock my gaze on my mother's, trying to make her understand all the feelings that are inside me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMzxZmYHADe
— Please don’t tell Jessy about these books, I ask her before going out.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhcbhVSxULD
502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUw3UneDeWm
502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ilLUEktyc
— Good evening, Megan, Mrs. Sutter calls me from the kitchen when I arrive at their house.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVpq6oRmIwQ
— Good evening.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ52uD2lTGqt
— Jessy hasn’t come home yet.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjvxukxyLyG
I look up at his mother with worried eyes. It's 8 p.m., classes ended several hours ago.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMaoPmPZebl
— Don’t worry, she reassures me. You know that his doctor advised him to go to the AIDS center, there was a meeting this evening. He had no desire to go, but I think it will do him good to talk to people who are going through the same thing as him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiCRiKSM8OP
— Did he leave there complaining ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJzwCM1HAj5
— You know him well enough to know that he complains a lot, she said, smiling.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCcS3Vuy2u
— When he is with me, he is rather...502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTrVCsL1Ds
Hearing the front door open, I don't finish my sentence.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr1PQUdL4vK
— Yes, but you are special to him, Elise whispers to me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4jfFoOfmV7
I remain speechless, wondering what she means by that.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXVL7kdegDk
— Sorry to be late.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMJ9hLo2OOI
Jessy's face is tense, he seems upset. The evening could be long if he remains in this state of mind.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBwtZdDemX8
— How was it ? His mother immediately questions him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjwDDbXCTOI
Jessy glances at me quickly before responding coldly : 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiAJv6JYqxb
— I don't want to talk about it.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZSNPBmdmOh
Mrs. Sutter looks at us in turn before announcing that she is going to watch television in her room so that we can watch the screen in the living room. Jessy walks around the bar and goes to help herself to some fruit juice.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbHjcTRLqP4
— You want some ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpZS0eWgGgb
His tone is less cold, but still full of anger that he tries to contain.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO9fHvmFx43
— Yes, thanks.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO59CjFAyPC
He purses his lips before asking me : 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn1r8UwMv7a
— What movie did you bring this evening ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVRSRmqTDUS
The week before, I had brought the filmGhost which caused us both to end up in tears. This time, I chose to take a lighter one, but still with my favorite actor. Proudly, I take the video tape out of my backpack and show it to him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡij8zbIr667
— Dirty Dancing ! 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4SuzeSe3Iy
He rolls his eyes, but I sense that he is holding back a smile.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwpm1Ppm2PE
— You and your Patrick Swayze ! I know you think he's the most handsome guy in the world, but your obsession with him is starting to turn into an obsession.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5WdV9nvTx6
I pretend to look shocked, which makes him laugh.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLbwAfuwaoi
— It’s true that he’s hot, but in my ranking of the most handsome guys, he only occupies second place.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAV5S3HoeAG
— Oh, my God, he whispers with a hint of despair. Which other actor are you planning to pester me with when you're done making me watch all his films ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL15VIq3sZ3
Jessy sighs, making a face. His good mood has returned, which makes me happy. I don't want to ask him about the meeting; If he wants to talk to me about it, he will do it alone. I just want to take his mind off things and see him smile. I get up to turn on the VCR while he puts away the bottle of orange juice.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFVNWXFS24B
— No others, I promise. For me, the hottest guy isn't an actor.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFKuiBAfd6R
— Ah good ? Who is it ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFs52oUJi1I
He comes to join me on the sofa, frowning.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9XrYNnt2Jh
— He’s someone I see every day.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlVCsMNt7ri
The movie starts and I shut up. Out of the corner of my eye, I see my friend racking his brain to figure out who I'm talking about.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhzkIPw4KD4
— Your father ? he asks after a few minutes.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67CXZ6Tj95
Without taking my eyes off the screen, I shake my head and smile. It amuses me to see him searching.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFfJNwyIEzo
— Someone from high school ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLjj5vGIyJE
J'acquiesce502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPp9F6nYDor
— Chad ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4cpAqQ9rW
A hint of anger and disbelief filters into his voice.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRagYRueIOd
— No. Jessy, do you want to watch the movie or tell me all the names of the guys at school ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOTXx2KVRtK
— Sorry, but no matter how hard I look, I can’t see who…502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl64q0Rbi5n
— It's you.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQkGFRBUXIS
I didn't mean to tell him, it just came out, and now I feel myself blushing as I keep my eyes glued to the television. The words have barely passed my lips before Jessy chokes on swallowing and starts coughing. He gets up to go drink some water.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb0RsOl3vgX
— Well, that makes you feel, I said mockingly, pausing the movie.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUdAjstKOKf
— You got me, he says from the kitchen.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgp2yORcDWx
I turn around on the couch to look at him.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvrjhgdNh1
— It’s the truth, Jessy, I’m not making you walk.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQNeglKoX3U
He comes back to sit next to me on the sofa. His cheeks are red as he places a kiss on my forehead.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9byleqJB90
— It’s nice of you to try to cheer me up. I love you.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm71NFua8PR
That's not what I'm trying to do, I really mean it, yet my heart immediately races : he adores me. 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjpQnLfiqhD
— Is it true ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzqzR2ryn8b
— Of course. You're my best friend, Meg.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfmEfzy6A6a
Oh… Friend ? My heart calms down quickly.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBKuDEwfFFx
— Aren’t you in good spirits ? Is it because of the meeting ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyTUmEXrXsE
Your mother told me about it, I add in front of his frown.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhaST3MtizR
— Yeah… it was depressing. Hearing all these patients talk about their fears… it brought me back to my own.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhBOgomCMAB
— Did you speak with them ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCHAYJNg5RT
— No, I listened to them. It’s strange to arrive in this center where I don’t know anyone and where they invite me to confide.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfvF7oumB0
— If you want, next time, can I accompany you ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhhERuQX9z2
I suggest, but I already know the answer.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4cHG27ySl3
— Non ! 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb6esPME6GL
His tone is harsher than I thought. However, he softens very quickly.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeBrScYuPci
— That’s nice, but no. I don't want you to come into this part of my life.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtcDO1FXWCO
— For what ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsxgJBO0lbX
Anger reappears in his eyes, he lowers his head.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnk5WITWuJS
— Because you are too important to me for me to drag you into this world of illness with me.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZaH7ECLJLV
— Jessy… 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkWQyVkk0s2
— No, Meg. I'm willing to give in when you force my hand to leave this house, but when it comes to AIDS, I won't change my mind, he said firmly, turning his gaze back to the television.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbIY3EJoBfT
— OK as you want.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5GvnFtNfUk
I sigh as he resumes playing the movie. After a few minutes of silence, he glances at me and whispers : 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8e9s4NdDVV
— Are you mad at me ? 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhj7gAFDCDo
I can't help but smile and lean my head on his shoulder like I've gotten used to doing when we watch movies together.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9cqTvCc79Q
— No, it’s your choice.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhEDf7HvAIE
He places another kiss on my forehead. I whisper to him without taking my eyes off Patrick Swayze : 502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrMKVLb801h
— Me too, I like you.502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp3R8SyDgfY
502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0cpcD90FQJ
502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNyMIyzj0UQ
502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk0syP0rXjG
502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDxxLMzXWTU
502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzVu7iY1LFv
502Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUb7Csso9zA
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