她從未理解過被愛的感受。213Please respect copyright.PENANAqZMCZK9v5X
213Please respect copyright.PENANAS4iBxQtKxZ
對於歧視的表現,年幼的孩童們往往展現的比大人們還要露骨。213Please respect copyright.PENANAcua7Ht9JQr
小學時期,無論是男孩們的棒球遊戲,抑或是女孩們的家家酒,對方總是露出為難的表情而拒絕讓她參與。213Please respect copyright.PENANA9cwj8lRUNz
絕大部分的時間她都是一個人塗鴉度過,但這段時期仍算是相安無事。213Please respect copyright.PENANAmDhiEPRCSq
213Please respect copyright.PENANAVkE96v6LPL
剛升上三年級時,不知道是哪個孩子開始帶頭偷偷嘲笑起她眼鏡上的髒污。213Please respect copyright.PENANAiWLBkHNfff
明明也有其他戴著眼鏡的孩子,卻只有她得忍受從四處隱隱約約傳來的嘲諷。213Please respect copyright.PENANA7QfDp9CMEN
即便她花了整整一個晚上試著擦拭油垢,到隔天還是遭到一樣的對待後,她才體認到被針對的並非物品,而是配戴著眼鏡的個人。213Please respect copyright.PENANAiulZyxJ3qZ
外型並不出色的她一旦成了標靶,種種惡意就不約而同地從周遭匯集而來。213Please respect copyright.PENANAIPqN1pJzBS
儘管受到許多不堪的對待,她也只是選擇默默承受,從未向那對埋首於工作中的雙親傾訴過此事。213Please respect copyright.PENANA9R7aa2PaNy
213Please respect copyright.PENANAbtqJd3u81v
當時年輕的女班導雖然有所察及,卻也為了避免麻煩裝作視而不見。213Please respect copyright.PENANAXUMydAjPEQ
反正只要事情沒有鬧大就不成問題。213Please respect copyright.PENANAg9fK9KWG5B
表面上看到課本被塗滿塗鴉,又或著是端著營養午餐時被絆倒。213Please respect copyright.PENANAbayi20HNUI
既然沒有造成明顯的傷勢,當事人也不曾對此發表意見,解讀成孩子們的小打小鬧倒也還說得過去。213Please respect copyright.PENANAFYyVwDHQs5
213Please respect copyright.PENANAW6PCukX0u5
對她而言唯一的救贖,就只有從小時候起便不曾停過的繪畫。213Please respect copyright.PENANAHNWc7aUkS6
她總是一個人流著眼淚,將自身的冀望寄託於那不被外界所污染,完全任由自己勾勒的圖畫世界。213Please respect copyright.PENANAEJss1CzQwQ
將身體的挫傷以線稿舒緩。213Please respect copyright.PENANA5GpzxlfLEb
把內心的不甘以著色潤飾。213Please respect copyright.PENANAExOnfKrUCz
她就在這被人反覆剝開傷痂的日子裡,渡過了一般人稱為童年的時期。213Please respect copyright.PENANADfnpuTYvCQ
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所幸在升上五年級後,她遇到了一名負責教授體育的導師。213Please respect copyright.PENANAXr1JgYeI8k
體態雖然因邁入中年而顯得有些肥胖,但有著剛毅性格的導師,在發現了些許異樣後,立即以嚴正的態度教育了那些欺負她的學生。213Please respect copyright.PENANAwEo3HMafao
213Please respect copyright.PENANAbATn6dDqCT
「對自己有信心一點。」213Please respect copyright.PENANA9QZwGzpfWK
這是到小學畢業之前,沉默寡言的導師私底下對她唯一說過的話。213Please respect copyright.PENANAo24Q7uBmIN
213Please respect copyright.PENANAHlZ0t6nw7z
謹記著恩師的那句認可,讓勉強跨出步伐的她也結交到了足以稱為知心的好友。213Please respect copyright.PENANAp9I9qeiPjN
一路到她升上高中為止,都過著過去從不敢奢求過,與平常人無異的校園生活。213Please respect copyright.PENANAlGprNzZUtv
然而,就如同小學時期絕大部份的朋友一樣。213Please respect copyright.PENANAYJpV8dF4Ot
即使是共同分享所有秘密的好友,雖然不是出於本意,但在結識了新的朋友以後,也不會對自己完全地敞開心房。213Please respect copyright.PENANA5Vei8djTVO
雖然覺得有些寂寞,但她更願意將其理解為無可奈何的成長過程。213Please respect copyright.PENANAl2cKG9E5sl
可是啊,最近的自己同樣無暇顧及到朋友也是不爭的事實──213Please respect copyright.PENANAW6w8gyFifr
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「畫得真好啊,這個。」213Please respect copyright.PENANABu95zqqlQa
那是在夕陽西下的校園裡,意外撿到自己畫冊的那名學長所說的第一句話。213Please respect copyright.PENANAipH1MiuHUB
213Please respect copyright.PENANAnWiclSorSm
體型高大的學長的身份在學校裡無人不知。213Please respect copyright.PENANAkIZAYn41l0
身為棒球隊裡的王牌投手,她早已聽過無數次關於學長的豐功偉業。213Please respect copyright.PENANAtt3pYerBIy
或許是出自命運的安排,那名學長和當年幫助自己的班導好巧不巧地有著相同的姓氏。213Please respect copyright.PENANACN5oRy6Gp4
明明和自己是完全相反的存在,卻一點架子都沒有的學長,溫柔地將畫冊用雙手遞給了她。213Please respect copyright.PENANAmA4ejQGBqC
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等到她意識到心跳不已的時候,抱著已經交還回來的畫冊,一個人獨自站在走廊上。213Please respect copyright.PENANA3MViXsX5DW
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那是她第一次體驗到戀愛的感受──213Please respect copyright.PENANAtlsTqOl1sf
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「喂!別想給我裝死啊!」213Please respect copyright.PENANA0O1BGnMfyA
突然湧入鼻腔的溺斃感迫使她從過去的夢境驚醒過來。213Please respect copyright.PENANAry5dRWYH16
213Please respect copyright.PENANAxPysGQG98a
「咳、咳咳咳……!」213Please respect copyright.PENANAHHhsUhBwKc
激烈的咳嗽過後,癱坐在地上的她才認知到自己目前身處的狀況。213Please respect copyright.PENANAWmOfDN6z6O
大塚寧寧用手將她的臉壓在小便斗裡。213Please respect copyright.PENANAlf7tXPEwiV
被髮絲黏附著的臉頰緊貼著冰冷的陶瓷,沿著內壁留下來的水不斷澆在她的臉上,而動彈不得的身體毫無反抗的餘地。213Please respect copyright.PENANA3CnbJJMkIj
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……全身都好痛。213Please respect copyright.PENANAvcIYpjM1qD
這是第幾次了呢,她的意識連要想起來都覺得有些困難。213Please respect copyright.PENANAQKa1kTcZNx
只能像是個布偶般被這兩名少女肆意地拳打腳踢。213Please respect copyright.PENANAAVs6EEtcHB
雖然這次惡劣的程度和先前幾次完全無法相比,但在本質上來說,和童年的種種之間並沒有什麼太大差別。213Please respect copyright.PENANAJfiFXpbFWt
只要忍耐到她們覺得膩了自然就會結束。213Please respect copyright.PENANAvjjM65Cs6J
大聲呼救的話,只會讓下次的遊戲變得更加喪心病狂,這是她從過去的經驗中所記取的教訓。213Please respect copyright.PENANAIJvH2ewNi7
213Please respect copyright.PENANA1Ub2vruKra
「我說美悠,接下來要怎麼做?」213Please respect copyright.PENANATeDb4k9yjc
大塚寧寧將臉轉向在角落盯著手機螢幕的佐伯美悠。213Please respect copyright.PENANABeZ1LnrzL6
在黑暗中發亮的長方形螢幕,將少女臉上染上一層詭譎的灰白色彩,而她目前正專注在螢幕的對話框中,經過彩繪的指甲飛快地在上面輸入文字。213Please respect copyright.PENANAMBcYVRpUQK
213Please respect copyright.PENANAP72vkwsW1o
「嗯。就像之前一樣讓她打掃環境好了,好煩,妳先自己想一想,我這邊正看到一個有趣的消息啦。」213Please respect copyright.PENANA2tcCczQZJO
少女頭也不抬地,隨意地對大塚寧寧下達命令。213Please respect copyright.PENANAYv8MvNsOrn
213Please respect copyright.PENANAOAylTqEK1g
「上次那個?喔~那還不簡單,喂──聽見沒有,美悠要說好好打掃環境知不知道啊?」213Please respect copyright.PENANAY4ggrxhZ21
「什……嗚!」213Please respect copyright.PENANAGBuiwu73ic
她才發出一絲絲聲音,施暴的少女就在手上加重了力道。213Please respect copyright.PENANANQ9R64bLoT
213Please respect copyright.PENANAQE1GDizHSN
「誰說可以回話了?啊?平常打掃不到的地方可要好好清理對吧,先從最不容易清理的縫隙開始給我舔。」213Please respect copyright.PENANArNOK2vCWPr
鼻尖被壓到小便斗底端的溝槽上。213Please respect copyright.PENANAtFnWzDECun
即便內心千百萬個不願意,但一想到接下來可能的暴行,她還是抗拒地慢慢伸出舌頭。213Please respect copyright.PENANAIs1Xw3n70C
213Please respect copyright.PENANA2FQA43rtxC
「噗,美悠美悠,快點來看!真的舔下去了耶!」213Please respect copyright.PENANAGIdkCfyah1
「不是說我在忙了嗎──咦?舔下去了?真的假的,有夠噁心耶,哈哈哈!到底有沒有這麼聽話啦!等等,讓我先拍下來,笑死人了!」213Please respect copyright.PENANAyaKisu29AX
「噫─!」213Please respect copyright.PENANAfyjPjwP65w
「躲什麼躲嘛!欸,沒想到拍的還不錯耶,好~信件發送!」213Please respect copyright.PENANA9xqYpafE3g
「到底是在跟誰聊啊,美悠?從剛剛就沒停過耶,啊,難不成是上次聯誼的男生?」213Please respect copyright.PENANAOVxk4jnnWg
「那些廢物怎麼可能嘛……哎,等我一下,他打過來了。喂喂,野宮學長~」213Please respect copyright.PENANA48CLOwlxDU
從佐伯美悠口中最後說出的那個姓氏,讓她不由得瞪大了眼睛。213Please respect copyright.PENANApmFh5AaMoB
不良少女帶著壞心的笑臉看了過來。213Please respect copyright.PENANADDg2xd1xYr
213Please respect copyright.PENANAql8ri8QR3i
「什麼呀~所以連學長的父親都說過很麻煩嘛,真是的,果然是從小學開始就讓人厭煩呢。」213Please respect copyright.PENANAHKNP0vQfav
突然之間,她覺得自己的意識像是從飽受疼痛的身體裡被抽離了一樣。213Please respect copyright.PENANA0UFUlYyLMN
剛剛,所說的話是什麼意思。213Please respect copyright.PENANANgJ1HlCLSU
學長的父親是指什麼……?213Please respect copyright.PENANAt3sJHjyLeV
明明應該是和自己毫不相關的人吧……?213Please respect copyright.PENANAWWRdl51OfY
為什麼要說麻煩什麼的……?213Please respect copyright.PENANAQ7xyt615ie
213Please respect copyright.PENANAYgaxLHWTff
「咦~~人家才不要,這種話要說你自己說,才不管你勒!嘻,真的要嗎?好啊,等我切換成視訊給你──」213Please respect copyright.PENANA6UghFlCbHt
佐伯美悠在假裝完抱怨以後,將原本靠在耳旁的手機遞到她的面前。213Please respect copyright.PENANA4bdlP4NBBg
黑暗中那發亮的長形方格中所連接的另一端,出現的是身處在房間裡,她所愛慕的那名學長的臉孔。213Please respect copyright.PENANAX4tNmc12KL
但是,卻和平常所看到的並不相同。213Please respect copyright.PENANAZUINfrCS8E
原本應該是帶著和藹笑容的圓臉上,如今卻一臉鄙視的表情與她對望著。213Please respect copyright.PENANAyGIYofeKzv
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「說真的,突然那樣告白讓我感到很困擾啊,不,應該說是覺得噁心了才對。」213Please respect copyright.PENANASzyqaLtvVN
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「我可是被隊友們狠狠地嘲笑了一番啊。」213Please respect copyright.PENANAOrgT1wPUVF
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「萬一害我在比賽中失常怎麼辦,難怪我家那老頭說是只會招引麻煩的傢伙,要不是為了小學的教育評鑑根本不想浪費時間。」213Please respect copyright.PENANA0ZRONmAA21
從學長嘴裡接二連三吐出的真實,硬生生地將她重要的回憶敲得粉碎。213Please respect copyright.PENANA0hpUAtRtBE
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然後,她總算發現到了。213Please respect copyright.PENANAfEBLMyD5xK
當初幫助自己的老師並非沉默寡言,而是根本懶得理會身為異類的自己。213Please respect copyright.PENANAMGorg6NRO3
那番「對自己有信心一點」的言論,並非特意給予自己的認可,充其量只是省得學生再惹麻煩,隨便敷衍了事的慰問而已。213Please respect copyright.PENANAI0EJlX9owt
213Please respect copyright.PENANAw3FvFIX6xM
「咦──怎麼,哈,這傢伙居然哭了耶~」213Please respect copyright.PENANAOfmQkZUFqo
「哎呀,都怪野宮學長你說得太過分了,不好好愛護人家怎麼可以呢~」213Please respect copyright.PENANAHr8cHD4uTi
「喂喂喂,什麼話嘛美悠,妳也替我想想啊,我只不過撿到一本破爛畫冊就惹上這種麻煩耶。」213Please respect copyright.PENANA5XhrQzoO5U
三人大笑的聲音在狹小的空間裡迴盪著。213Please respect copyright.PENANAbIPc5FJFEP
她維持著原來的姿勢一動也不動,眼睜睜地直視著這個無比醜陋的現實。213Please respect copyright.PENANA0TwbmVbTxq
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……好想死。213Please respect copyright.PENANAuSpGBeDaec
真的,好想要死去。213Please respect copyright.PENANAso2iEi5FHp
受夠這爛到不行的人生了。213Please respect copyright.PENANAN1KlLiICOW
213Please respect copyright.PENANAQlx5iT1Nc6
反正已經一無所有。213Please respect copyright.PENANAcJ59EiC2OU
自己不被任何人所愛,亦不被任何人所需要。213Please respect copyright.PENANA3oVXhoWGot
一直以來所認知的世界全是謊言,和那些繪畫一樣都是自己虛構的愚蠢妄想。213Please respect copyright.PENANA7x00o90jUs
活著盡是碰到些痛苦不堪的事情,那倒不如死掉還來得輕鬆多不是嗎。213Please respect copyright.PENANAyQaUAvcsqI
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但是,在那之前。213Please respect copyright.PENANAVVrYghrgrT
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──我要把妳們這些人全都殺了。213Please respect copyright.PENANAtgUQhCKM5D
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/ Xanadu Xanthochroi and Yuka213Please respect copyright.PENANAsW35Q7XTKY