— No, I don't feel like it.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTHBitNt4zO
— But yes, it will be fun.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOipUsUo8Wu
— What's the funny thing about going to school on a day when there's no class ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMH2kWoBetC
We have one of those discussions where I try to convince him to come out. This time, I set my sights on the Halloween party that the school organizes like every year on the evening of October 31st.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8hOY9wQab
I thought about his question for a moment. How can I make him give in this time ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYwQhFr3PNA
— The classes will be emptied of their desks. There will be entertainment, sweets… a ball.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZM53GsDVRD
He raises an eyebrow and makes me understand that this is not a given.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAdUDOsP3GS
— Do you see me dancing ? ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH1vu4Nw5wI
I ignore his reply and continue mischievously : 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCPoTYZutw
— We will be disguised, and you can annoy everyone who criticizes you from behind. Why else do you think I would go ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQQrSgCiQX
I can see by his expression that I have a point.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQnb0grKxdV
— Hello, Megan.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNZKleZwqhZ
— Hello, Elise, are you well ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE2JFHx6cpr
I spend so much time with Jessy that I have become very close to Mrs. Sutter. She is always happy to see me at their place and invites me to come whenever I want. I feel a bit like home there.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsxeKVdNOzA
— Where will you go in disguise ? Asks Elise who heard my last sentence.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqzKs1qst0G
— At the high school Halloween party.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhlT3r0TGug
— Good idea ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLdiBJZpaLd
With one look, Jessy glares at his mother. Mrs. Sutter places a laundry basket on the dining room table where we are and begins to fold the clothes. I grab a T-shirt and spread it on the table to help him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tnWPV9iXW
— It will do you good to go out and have fun, you stay too cooped up here ruminating.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCn20JEVV4
— I like to be alone with my thoughts, Jessy defends, grabbing the T-shirt I’m holding in my hands.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfyKuIxQ0Xa
— Luckily you're here, Meg, otherwise he'd never leave his room.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzoKC7yMxQY
I grab another piece of clothing and start folding it.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrNxCgcvNDs
— Mom, stop. It’s okay, you win, I’ll go to the damn party ! But Meg, please stop worrying about my clothes ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQ8CWorgLn
I look down at the item of clothing I'm holding : it's one of his boxers. I let go immediately, but I already feel my cheeks turning red. Jessy grabs it and hides it behind his back. His face is as red as mine.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgLZxP1lr59
— Sorry… I’m… so used to doing it… at home, I said, stuttering.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1JIns4bKr2
Mrs. Sutter bursts out laughing as she watches us.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpmLfm3Cy5Y
— Mission accomplished, she comes to high five me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgKhODEZrkD
— What are we going to disguise ourselves as ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWLdEh2bmZC
— There's no way I'm going to wear a suit ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGhSaaHHfst
Jessy responds quickly, looking at us in turn.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGLOV0SXRvC
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqnc4Kwu7G
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJpNrY9NWB8
The next week, we're in the main hallway of the school during break time, talking about the Halloween party. I keep trying to convince Jessy to dress up but he remains stubborn.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk0jsKXwrkT
— I could see you as James Dean, I think out loud as I look at him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡes5An71IgO
— Is it because I'm going to die young like him ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLXCsCmBcSV
Immediately, I grimace.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFEoYsPEG0K
— Stop with that ! I was thinking of James because you are handsome and sexy like him but if you prefer to see the negative side...425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJQ5Sf8sukC
— I was joking, he smiled. Beautiful and sexy, huh ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoaN0B3OGbN
I roll my eyes, smiling as my cheeks turn red. My words came out before I could hold them back. In Jessy's presence, I feel like I'm losing my composure. It is enough for him to stare at me with those beautiful green eyes for my mouth to respond without having the approval of my brain.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFNuoEiexCO
— I’m dreaming where your cheeks are all red, he mocks, pointing to my face with his index finger.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡszxiUIu0kH
I give him a little tap on the arm which makes him burst out laughing. I love hearing this sound. I have seen him so angry, sullen, lonely, that when he laughs I am happy.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQCAI0OIR3J
— At times, you remind me of my brother. You have the same dubious humor every…425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpiVHytegFH
I leave my sentence hanging as my smile freezes when I see Amy passing near us. She gives me an icy look and completely ignores Jessy.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOp7K88yVCy
— Why is Amy looking at you like that ? Jessy asks me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4WIZHBq1J1
I turn to him, trying to ignore my former friend. I don't want her to realize how much her attitude hurts and disappoints me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEmfpgvnp1B
— I don't know. Since I'm no longer with Chad, she doesn't speak to me anymore. To think that she was my best friend... As children, we were all together often : Chad, Amy and me. And today, I feel like I've lost a part of my past.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ybDjkbgzd
— People change and evolve differently over the years. She'll come back to you one of these days.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡil8JwMaZu4
— You think ? I ask him, hoping he's telling the truth.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOfOd5xx9lx
— I'm sure. Who could give up a friend like you ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ371yXGVcv4
— Yeah, a friend, I breathe with annoyance while scrutinizing him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcrIftNCUuB
I would really like him to see me as something other than his friend.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwWbT33NX0b
— And with Chad, where are you ? He questions casually.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz9XOOrGm1S
— Nowhere. We haven't spoken in several weeks. I turned the page on him. On the other hand, I continue by staring at him. There are three other boys who asked me on a date.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWa0ZHREsM8
Am I dreaming or has his expression suddenly changed ? He lowers his face, staring at the ground as if it holds all the answers in the universe.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡczhn1bv1ZV
— Did you agree to go out with them ? He whispers in a strangled voice.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuJs0dhskgc
— No, I refused. You're the only guy I want to spend time with at the moment.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4CSJRDxMus
Suddenly, he lifts his face and smiles. I observe him carefully. Maybe he doesn't really see me as a friend after all. It’s enough to make me smile again.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEinHXyHPBf
— You and Chad broke up shortly after I arrived in town, but there was one thing that struck me from the few times I saw you together.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡspW5c9Y1bv
— Ah good ? What ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKqJeBsLz0E
— The distance there was between you. I mean, you were never in each other's arms or making a move to touch each other.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYJaHI5UsvE
— Is that what you did with your exes ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8XaWsWE7mD
I scrutinize him to read his reaction which does not take long : 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFsdE6uBgwC
— No, but I have never been in love.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaxeds59VnB
— Maybe Chad didn’t like me that much, I shrug. Or that I'm not the type of girl that guys like to hug.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoAuK8UtFOU
— Oh yes, any man would be happy to be able to hold you against him, he says without a shadow of hesitation.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG11sfZk80S
So why don't you do it ? ! I want to ask him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIDGghY1YJ3
But suspecting that this would turn him on, I just stare at him and remain silent. However, I am happy with his admission, so I continue with a smile : 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIH4I1LdNIM
— So for Halloween, what are we dressing up as ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZNqxHncXqj
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxRy4v8Lshj
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAgIxPcOaW9
On Friday evening, I found my parents in the living room while waiting for Jessy to arrive. I enter the room and turn around asking them : 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWv7Eg4FvS
— Is my dress okay ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9cYlooQ3vu
— You are very chic, admire my father.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2Vf18WSKw
For the occasion, I opted for a black Charleston— style dress, and my hairstyle is adorned with a white feather. It's not my favorite outfit, but Jessy only agreed to wear a very classy suit jacket.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjnlzOcM5pc
— Megan, why do you have a mask in your hand ? Nina asks.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQcjoWMzspN
— I'll put it on when I get to school. I promised Jessy that, under cover of anonymity, he could annoy the students who criticize him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP2sK0Orq3j
My mother laughs.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQqCZTwhyPs
— That’s definitely your idea ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxiHrXQzJBe
— It was one of the arguments to decide him to leave his house.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5jxPThiXhR
— You two spend a lot of time together, my father comments seriously.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqm9EkJPTsw
— Yes, he’s great ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhYm8Jc8jsF
— You know we love Jessy, but we're worried about you.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTZBVtJTZQ4
— We are just friends.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1MiLxstKhf
— I'm not talking about that. Losing someone close to you is difficult.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLF7ozGInSW
— I know. I know that one day he may no longer be here, but if that were to happen, I would have time to prepare for it. And he's my best friend, I can't stop seeing him, that wouldn't be fair to him or me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzdE6JmlWWP
— Are you sure it’s just friendship ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOWK0R8NQWU
My father examines my face which immediately turns purple.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSzYESpWUbl
— I preferred Chad, my sister objects, sulking.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEUkJ0ka4R3
Without meaning to, Nina makes me smile again and distracts my father's attention. Admitting to myself that I'm in love with Jessy is one thing, dropping this bombshell in front of my father is another. I already know the moral lesson that would await me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGosoI0FLPz
— And I find this school rule stupid which stipulates that you have to be fifteen years old to be able to attend this evening. I would have liked to go there ! She says, crossing her arms over her chest.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzwuplLpBG
— Then you should have asked Chad to invite you ! I said, provoking her.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdXsm2zTfO
In response, she taps her foot on the ground while the doorbell rings.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ54Ybl8AjNh
— I go ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNWQpMXHr1
I rush to open the door to Jessy. And I literally stand there glued to the spot when I see him in his black suit with a white shirt, black tie and hat. In his hand he holds a white mask similar to mine. He exudes a particular charm that disturbs me even more than usual, which is saying something.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeIAm37G2Ot
After a few seconds of examining each other, he leans towards me to hang a white rose on the strap of my dress.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk729uKuQMm
— How pretty you are, he whispered to me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ36x1MENlk4
His hands brush the skin of my shoulder and I feel myself melting. I take a deep breath to force myself to pull myself together.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdk3fTwZmeE
— Isn't that okay ? He asks me, visibly worried.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbnkSeXHGPm
I can't tell him the truth. He was very clear with me when I let myself kiss him. And even though he hasn't spoken to me about it again, I still feel a burning shame. Since then I have restrained my actions and am content to be the friend he needs so much.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYzVz1hc4BC
— Yes, it's going very well. It’s just that it’s hot in the house and cold outside, the contrast struck me. Come on, just a minute, I'll get my coat.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB7zcqTQgKL
He nods and follows me to the living room where he politely greets my family as usual.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5cauS1CQAf
— Wow, Jessy ! This costume suits you really well ! Launches my mother.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpuGQPuZDvR
— Thank you, Mrs. Crawfords. Nina, I thought of you, I brought you a little thing to console you for not being able to come to the party.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDX2cBrs8Iz
He takes a rose similar to mine out of his pocket and hands it to my sister, who is speechless for a few seconds.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvICsZDYvR
— Thank you, Jessy, she finally said. Then looking at us, she adds : I take back everything I said earlier, it’s Jessy, my favorite ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEQD7nUjV3U
We burst out laughing.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgimO81i7Y0
— Well done, Jessy, you managed to dethrone Chad ! My father is joking.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMO78J6bCkU
— It wasn’t won though, smiled the young man. — Here we go ? I ask him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT1OGqFzBIc
Jessy makes a hesitant face and answers me without much enthusiasm : 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡleu02frDBj
— I would have done without it, but since I have to… let’s go ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEAfoFX3D2z
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPEmsqoAI10
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVnYSqOy5HA
Two hours later, I see that Jessy is having a good evening. We took the route of anxiety : a walk in the middle of the corridors of the high school which, for the occasion, were decorated as a house of horror with skeletons suddenly appearing in front of us, vampires thirsty for blood who throw themselves on those who dare to approach them or even werewolves who run after us in the feigned hope of devouring us. There are many activities, but Jessy doesn't forget his little revenge either. When we pass a tall dark guy dressed as Dracula, whom my companion immediately recognizes as one of his persecutors, he puts on his mask, approaches slowly and manages to drop off without anyone, except me, noticing. has a large rubber tarantula on his shoulder. A moment later, we hear a scream echo through the classroom as the guy in question squirms in every direction to escape the spider. Jessy and I walk out of the room laughing until we cry.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzItjMu3pxw
— I admit, he said to me shortly after in one of the corridors, when we caught our breath, that just for that, it was worth coming ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7pv8WOwm16
— See, I told you we’d have fun ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK7EOU8HuMU
— You were right, thank you for forcing my hand. (He takes off his mask before staring at me.) Of all the people I know, you are always there for me, no matter what. For what ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtVuJzuDy4h
He is suddenly serious.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJwOBHymMDz
Can't you see that I'm in love with you, idiot ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt5VdzIvaEq
I want to tell him, but I hold back.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9zWPlTdyz
Instead, I answer him : 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi6FKKBxMVn
— Why not ? You're my friend, right ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUk8praVdro
He nods, and his green eyes shine with a strange light.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq9YdrGataL
— Oh, Jessy, come ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUHuzpC0mwr
Without waiting for a response, I grab him by the sleeve of his suit and force him to follow me into one of the classes that says : Come discover your future through cards.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd38qDgnE78
For the occasion, the room, deliberately darkened, was divided into three parts by curtains, thus constituting cabins where clairvoyants sit. We approach one of them.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNvdIpeMft
— Can we ? I said, pointing to the seats in front of her.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9TnGJaLfp
— Of course, my children, come. Sit down.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhCHbzGOTaL
She is a small woman with brown hair, with a fairly fleshy build, who inspires confidence at first glance.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLKNismoh3K
— Who wants to start ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeShiVb8HxM
Jessy and I exchange a look.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn2g28pPrMF
"Iron, Meg."425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa5wf0movis
— OK, draw seven cards from the fan in front of you.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWpMHaBqhuE
She turns the cards over one after the other, arranging them in a sort of large cross.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAFoR4Nipp
— You are a nice girl, a little too serious at times, she said to me. You are always there for the people you love. This card, which designates the Empress, tells me that you are good at studies. I can assure you that you will go to university and study for a long time. A great job awaits you at the end.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHLFTGwte65
I'm happy, studies are very important to me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNBucIaIAEo
— This card, she continues, showing me the Lover, — tells me that you are hesitating between two boys. One has the key to your heart and the other relationship is more controlled by your reason, the first boy completely capsizes you, the second rather symbolizes security.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO8vXbEzIpM
I feel myself blushing from head to toe and, silently, I thank the heavens that the room is just lit by candles. Jessy and Chad ! Only I'm not in love with Chad and I'm banking on love... I feel Jessy's gaze weighing on me, but I don't dare respond.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbULMiudLN
— I can't tell you more, it will be up to you to choose between these two men, she places her hand on mine.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZMYfGOS73e
— Thanks.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY1bCRBOmOi
— Your turn, young man, announces the woman, shuffling her cards before spreading them again on the table.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMCqvv9B4Vi
As I did, Jessy takes out seven cards from the deck and turns them over as she goes.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjLRNN8rYUH
— You are a kind boy, very sensitive, who has suffered a lot, but you do everything to keep it from showing. You play tough to hide your heart of gold. You are gifted in studies, but this card, it points to the Moon, leads me to believe that you are especially gifted in the arts. The drawing ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRpLPU42A3T
— I painted a lot, but I stopped for a while.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDyqssT7JMY
— You should start again. You are an anxious boy, and this would calm you down.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVFSy1z15dW
She turns over another card : the Hermit.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuconXZVvqE
— This one tells me that you tend to run away from others. You like to be alone and, at the same time, you experience this solitude as if you were afraid of the world around you. Yet you are not alone... There is someone in your life that you love, but, for I don't know what reasons, you seem to be running away from this love that life offers you.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUF8hOLbSrK
I see Jessy growing nervous next to me as he stares intently at the cards.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAif1qAlkiQ
The clairvoyant turns over the penultimate card : the Nameless Arcana. Despite myself, I flinch.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhsAlEURLXj
— Don't worry, the lady is reassuring, this card is scary with the skeleton reaping it represents, but it rarely means physical death. Above all, it is a sign of change in life. Your existence will be turned upside down, you will succeed in overcoming your fears to fully live your destiny.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4rCoyhKX4T
She turns over the last card : the World.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKSD2x1bWVL
— In the coming months, you are going to be very happy young man, much more than you imagine, but for that, you must open your heart to accept the gift that is being given to you, said the clairvoyant, looking Jessie.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOmRcuz2Rkm
— Thank you, Madam, he stammers, visibly embarrassed.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkqM8zfiRzY
— One last thing : Concerning your health, just live day to day without worrying too much. Destiny is destiny, you cannot change what will happen.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPYN4S8Xk3y
Jessy nods, looking serious, even though my heart is pounding. Has she just confirmed his imminent death ? His words are enigmatic to me but not to425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx07NiFEkWo
Jessy who gets up quickly and leaves the room, I follow suit.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx5uHuMqBcB
— Jessy, are you okay ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQjSIyjjZQI
— Yes, very good.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLH7ObEoL0j
— I'm sorry. It was a stupid idea to go see a psychic.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEBUFpLaP07
He stops and turns to me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfReaUxIw5d
— Don't worry, she told us an ending that you and I already know.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbgYcMcOpMX
— It wasn't that clear to me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJQUCpmKkeg
— Yes, but you are always overly optimistic while I…425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuzoEkxbuyQ
— You are disarmingly pessimistic.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjennA1TEGP
My reply makes Jessy laugh.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2HzL0crCDK
— It's true. Between the two of us, we have the perfect balance.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrlKfh1cTOA
I smile in turn, thinking about how we complement each other perfectly.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsr4ycSkUUb
— Seriously, are you sure you’re okay ? If you want, can we go back ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ebQ6g0tEr
— No, we're having fun. Come on, come on ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiz5Msyq8SN
He gives me a reassuring wink. For the first time, he takes my hand, which suddenly makes me feverish, and guides me towards the gymnasium which has been transformed into a ballroom. Black and orange garlands cascade from the ceiling, paper pumpkins have been installed on the tables where soft drinks are served. In the four corners of the room, plastic skeletons held by wires move like puppets. In the center of the room, students wiggle to the rhythm of a wild Rolling Stones song.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDXhQwnojQu
— You are thirsty ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTFCAMHbEXP
I nod with a nod. Jessy leaves me to go get two cups. I look around the room. In a corner, I see Chad dressed as a vampire, and his friends. Apparently they are the ones responsible for leading the anxiety journey. Then a tall blonde girl comes and kisses him full on the mouth. Despite her Marilyn Monroe disguise, I recognized Amy immediately. That's why she's been running away from me since we broke up, she did everything to seduce him and it worked. Chad quickly forgot me and her, that traitor ! Jessy returns with the cups. I drink mine dry.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9gWZ4IzV25
— What do you have ? He asked in front of my furious face.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡprUYszPJUt
I nod and show him Chad and Amy.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlVUupTaM7o
— Oops, is the only sound that comes out of his mouth.
Jessy looks over to the corner where Chad and Amy are watching us, seeming to be watching for my reaction.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8geTTz5qnw
— Come Dance.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvAeBGaWvjj
He takes my hand again, which has the effect of calming me down immediately.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgVVYF56bO3
— I thought you didn't dance ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs93BR9Zitc
— I never said that.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMEJa2GcuwA
His smile completely melts me. I let myself be guided to the dance floor. The music starts with a soft song. Like every time I'm in contact with Jessy, my heart starts racing. Without thinking, I put my arms around his neck, while he places his hands on my waist. Soon my head is resting on his shoulder. I breathe in its sweet and intoxicating scent, a mixture of flower soaps and aftershave. I feel wonderful, everything is so natural with him. But he stops abruptly. His gaze is focused on a girl, small in stature, with bobbed red hair, who turns her back to us and is chatting with friends a few steps from us.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxUo0AZ4nA7
Jessy doesn't take his eyes off her as I feel his shoulders tense.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoa5BrdYF18
— What is…425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCbMhAKFmsj
The girl turns around, revealing her face to us. Jessy takes a deep breath before turning his attention back to me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡje04dyvRqO
— I need to get some fresh air, he tells me, white as a sheet.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlMn0qq879
We push through the crowd to the parking lot where he takes a deep breath. A cold wind rose, carrying with it the dead leaves from the trees to our feet.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjPgqeuU6KE
We lean against a car.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9KRoXKDPGv
— Why are you shaking ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXDna9we6af
I question him timidly.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl0fTJ4DOBN
— I don't really want to talk about it.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHcHcbskcd2
— But you are livid ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDAWCWOaVrx
— I don't want to talk about it. Let's forget that, okay ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ylxOskS6Q
— Agree as you like.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9eywoqi9AL
He raises a questioning eyebrow at my resolve. It's not like me to give up so quickly. Usually, I insist that he talks to me, but now, I'm afraid to know the truth.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKrVvHDH79w
— Shall we go back ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCual8SlBEu
— Yeah, I think it's better after all that.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2vup38tmKh
We set off. The high school is only a few blocks from our homes.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡICSC8WQef6
— All that ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTWCzRVZpTb
— Between the clairvoyant, Chad and Amy…425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA1Kjcg4Qhl
— And your latest conquest, I tell him, not being able to contain the feeling of jealousy that has invaded me since he saw this girl.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCwKMdqbJn
Jessy turns to me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCiysPM1d8
— It's not what you think. I thought it was Haley... The girl who gave me AIDS.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡksoAzyoHrT
— Every time you talked to me about the virus, you told me you were handling it all. But after seeing your reaction tonight, I think you're handling things the wrong way. You didn't solve the problem with her. I think you should see her again, or at least talk to her.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNM4aI2ntla
— I don't see how that would help me. You know, it was just an adventure, but one that I will regret for the rest of my life... — Think about it.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw8jfghexnR
He nods silently.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWyvzoCbKDc
I don't add anything. It's his story, and only he knows whether he wants to look straight ahead after settling his scores, or stay immersed in a past that gnaws at him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw6nHtZAQUq
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDVbF3efOv
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnBD264ScdB
The next day is Sunday; dressed in my coat, a scarf and my gloves, I leave my house, determined to face the morning cold which has suddenly fallen on the region.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQTdAcWWtTU
A black car stops next to me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLY9Odnt8Bb
— Hey, a familiar voice calls out to me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIP5kiqBQbT
— Hi. Jessy, do you have a car ? ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNc8tvR7cnq
— Eh yes ! I've been talking to my mom about it for a while, and this morning she came back with it. She was so happy to see me out of the house ! You come ? I'll take you.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUQS8KXO4mi
He starts and, quickly, I see that he is heading towards the highway ramp.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT0n9Pv95Bb
— Where are we going ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN5X168dB6g
— It's coming ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVVy7HCoIXg
— At the cinema ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQGi9LrqqY
— Non. 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3yBDTwfIOU
— Take a walk in the forest ? No, that's not the road. So, maybe visit a museum ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLEHVp4ivAV
— No. You'll see, it's a surprise, and he gives me a big, innocent smile.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwvZviioSvm
— OK, anyway, wherever it is, I'm up for it.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKy5JkOsF88
— Your parents won't be worried ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP63EK6JgQE
— I told them I was going to see you. They suspect that I'm going to spend the day with you.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxhkxF03e6Y
— And that's going to be the case, because we're not going very close. I don't think we'll be back until tonight.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡefR8rMms3j
Still want to come ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4C5EmAMjpN
He gets onto the highway.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZwmP3De7Z4
— Totally ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡotFkLnW9NM
— I want to show you Allentown. Today, we are going to walk in the footsteps of my past...425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzpymDQeVuz
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnwhCccJGEz
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After driving for almost three hours, Jessy parks in a small suburban street that seems very nice. All the houses are undoubtedly owned by wealthy people.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4cHSSbYFKu
— We have arrived, he declares, getting out of the car.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhq2YoiBMQz
I'm happy that he trusts me enough to show me the places that mattered to him. I get out and look at the house we are parked in front of. It is a single storey white villa with a well kept lawn. Large bay windows let the sun shine through, and a solid oak door welcomes visitors via a small path which splits the lawn into two parts.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBeEEwPVVBQ
— Is this where you lived ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡarHVIpvA6O
Jessy has an enigmatic smile.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvSFkNIkUgV
— No, it’s not my place. We're at Haley's.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡza46Fw8cHa
He gestures with his chin towards the beautiful house. I suddenly have a pit in my stomach.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIawS7BCLRc
— What ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwGQ2tXRd6v
— I found her, it was very easy, actually. She told me her name and what neighborhood she lived in, a call to telephone information was enough.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYP9EfIOgQF
He leans back in his car, staring at the house like he can see through the walls. Little by little, his enthusiasm seems to diminish. His face turns pale...425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmYGSpxZFBq
Suddenly, Jessy comes around the car and announces to me : 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNtga137Qlh
— Come on, let’s go.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn7iT2b0NVK
I remain stunned.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw30g4jreiv
— Oh no, we didn’t come all this way to leave now. You need to go talk to him ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1PDocZ71hc
He stares at me, his face frozen.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfHhPg5b5fE
— I am scared.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRquZzYHqzz
— I know, but if you don't go, you'll be left with everything that's on your heart for a long time to come. You need to move forward Jessy, you can't stay stuck with all these emotions.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4zLHIMviZY
He nods and, taking a deep breath, heads towards the house. I see him approaching the door, taking the small gravel path. I'm afraid for him. It rings and only waits a few seconds before the door opens. Jessy enters. I'm not really thrilled that he's seeing one of his ex girlfriends again. What if he fell back into her arms ? This scares me as much as imagining him screaming horrors at him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5pnEbcjqvP
After all, she is HIV positive, he could perfectly well have a real relationship with her. Not just a friendship like with me. Now I'm almost wishing I was sick, my God, I'm really going crazy ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqjwI8UmQHi
During his absence, I also wonder about his behavior. Just the day before, when we talked about the clairvoyant's words, he repeated to me that he had nothing to offer a woman who, in any case, would quickly tire of only being able to kiss him. I managed to tell him that some relationships go beyond that. But he remained firm in his positions. Lost in my thoughts, I don't see him coming back. I jump when he opens the driver's side door and slides behind the wheel. I see right away that it's not going well. He is even paler than when he went to ring the bell, and his hands are clinging to the steering wheel as if his life depended on it. His whole body is shaking. I feel him at the end of his nerves even though he tries to control himself. I ask him half— heartedly : 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGHJ5ccbd8G
— Did it go wrong ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ89L3Tsbcie
— It was his mother who opened the door to me...425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaS94wM3VgL
His face expresses such hatred that I immediately think of the evening on the bridge when he was hanging above the void, screaming. I would bet that at this very moment, he would let himself fall under the wheels of vehicles rather than live another minute on this Earth. He struggles to speak, but I don't do anything to rush him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡERsVGwQy4n
— Haley died five months ago.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgJTgjF9vNz
I immediately understand the dark thoughts going through his head at that precise moment.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfIDjmtHcVd
— Is that all his mother told you ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx1q5aKaANO
— Oh no, he gets angry. She told me she is sorry that her child infected me ! She also gave me a letter that Haley wrote to me before she died. We're getting out of here ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjuLTvKhGtN
He starts off with a bang and rushes through the streets which, apparently, hold no secrets for him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Fk3FwyTRR
— Jessy, please slow down a little, you’re scaring me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzsMkrQ7ZvP
He doesn't respond, but I notice that he raises his foot. He drives like this for several minutes, in silence. We enter downtown Allentown. He takes the main artery then branches off several times before stopping abruptly in a small street. On either side, tall buildings block out most of the daylight. Along the buildings with their gray walls, rusty iron fire escapes make the place even more sinister.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwjbVAmzYj
Jessy gets out of the car and slams the door. I'm. I am so afraid that he will try to end his life. He walks to the center of the street, where metal garbage containers are piled up, and hits them with all his might several times.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvoakTSvZi
— Jessy, please calm down, I’m begging you.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLNSPEQq6r
— For what ? Can you tell me what all this is for ? What's the point of living ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFZFUzmqxF
— Stopped. (I place myself between him and the trash can on which he pours all his anger.) You are alive ! You hear me ? Are you still alive ! And by the time the disease breaks out, perhaps doctors will have found a treatment. But the force you put into hitting this container, you have to put into fighting yourself.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ39sLlT9Ti7
— But why ? What is keeping me on this planet ? Don't you understand that I'm going to end up like Haley ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIFrwWQGN68
He pushes me away with one arm before knocking again.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBl7xIP006
Soon his fist is bloody.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtilGKwMCd9
— But why are you hitting this trash can ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdIwkl7ZimG
— Because I'm angry, and even then, angry is an understatement for what I feel.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYnipkSe3P5
— For what ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY5I2KysviK
He, usually so secretive, finally decides to confide in me while now kicking the poor trash can.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8v1lLTSsS9
— This is the place where my life changed, he said to me, out of breath.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjtfLGy5AwL
He stops knocking and points to a spot near the right wall, a little further away.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjrD7YYnUcD
— Do you see there ? This is the place where my father, my real father, died. He was killed by a local gang who wanted to steal his money, they dragged him here before shooting him. When I was little, I was terrified of losing my parents. I don’t know where this anxiety came from, it was unreasonable, it woke me up at night. My father reassured me, constantly telling me that he would always be there to protect me, and when I was five, suddenly, he was no longer there. He let me down. He didn't protect me ! Things would have been very different if he were still here. And now Haley is gone ! And it pisses me off because, even if it’s wrong, I would have liked to scream at him with all the rage I have in my heart ! And all I have instead is this damn letter ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlo5SZzOsos
He takes the missive out of his coat pocket and shakes it in the air, as if he wants to get rid of it but is unable to.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW3f9A9FJLp
— I understand that well ! But when you calm down, you will want to know what she had to say to you. Your father didn't get to say goodbye to you, Haley did it through these words in this envelope.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcdDFSbOJBN
My voice is choked with sadness. Jessy looks at me, searching in my eyes for the reason for my sudden emotion.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjONMyrEsLQ
— You’re right, he whispers, looking at the letter still in his hand. I must not condemn her, she was not the only one responsible for what happened that evening, he said more calmly.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMG44AjWqvU
— It's true. She didn't know she was sick at the time. But on the other hand, I can't help but feel relieved that you didn't see her again. I know, it’s awful to think that ! 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPBvxipFpAN
I turn away, I don't dare look at him anymore. I just told him about the fear that filled me the first time he mentioned Haley. Even though she infected him, he had a history with her, he was closer to her than he will ever be to me, and it breaks my heart to admit that.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiZ1Jopiedu
Jessy stands in front of me and examines my face.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvGx26kEzuP
— Why do you feel relieved ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn0x8x8RYdq
There is no longer any trace of anger in his voice, just curiosity.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8q1SIEnZfM
— For nothing, forget it.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡotZ1IyzVQB
— Yes, tell me, he breathes softly. I hesitate, watching his piercing gaze.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0kzdoVsXzH
— Because I was afraid you would get back together with her.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtbrNHbkfQx
He looks at me, incredulous.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVrDEPHCcDz
— I know..., I continue but I quickly interrupt myself, no longer knowing how to continue without admitting my feelings.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxGU7Db5tXp
Jessy stares at me for a moment that seems to last forever.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEhxzvrWTXr
— When you were with Chad, I said to myself : "Nothing will ever happen between us while he can do anything for her. "425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkVUv8uSvk
I remain in shock, did he just tell me that he is dying to be with me or was I dreaming ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhU2w2xpqCt
— I'm not going back with Chad.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ66rjssh7ID
— It's true ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlPET6QWeuO
I nod, grabbing the lapel of his coat.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrTkXrqjszl
— Chad has never been an obstacle between us. He's not the one I want to be with.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJBqW3Fsi9F
He wipes his forehead where beads of sweat appear and looks at his damaged hand.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNp3Y3H4iTc
— Actually, I mainly thought that it would scare you to be with me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpVddnkv0Ri
— Maybe you should have asked me ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqA8o5Xohat
I fiddle with a button on his coat.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYywIrc0TO
— It's true.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCf2tLQXmpA
He purses his lips and says : 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0eS75SnYH5
— Do you want to go out with me ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCyr1waI18c
Finally you decide ! I smile. Of course I want to be with you, that’s all I’ve thought about since we met.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu0HLdFl758
Jessy gives me a big smile.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNsW5rOGIH5
— I don't know how long I'll stay alive.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡINaWgdCMNW
— We'll see. We're going to make every day count.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2iyK2FzvA
— And with Chad, is it definitely over ? Are you sure ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj1kKHnrwSC
— Jessy, Chad and I broke up because you came into my life and offered another horizon to my future. When I met you, I realized I never really loved him. He's just a friend. That’s the real reason… At least for me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzgxVB3eb55
I hand him some tissues which he wraps around his scratched hand, which has already stopped bleeding. Then he puts his arm around my shoulders, kisses my forehead and leads me towards the car, putting the letter in his coat pocket.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRSd41GCvXn
— I suspected that I was somewhat responsible for this story, he said, winking at me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdOgTdPWiO1
Suddenly, he hands me the car keys.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQB8nRTUdjY
— I don't feel like driving after all this, would you like it ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhMu1C5iiee
Too happy to be able to get behind the wheel, I eagerly grab the keys.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL7aFwVumNj
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We enter Millisky, the town is deserted at this hour, only the street lights give a semblance of life to the streets. I glance at Jessy, lost in thought. Suddenly, instead of heading towards his house, I change direction and head towards the hill. I can't let him go home like this. Having reached the top, I stop the car. Jessy snaps out of his thoughts and looks around, surprised. He doesn't know this corner of the city where I myself rarely go.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ14ng4j7zaV
— Where are we ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlh3A234nN1
— Come with me.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFAdWIWSjgD
We are on a small dirt road bordered by a security fence. Tall grass protrudes from the slope overlooking the town. Jessy joins me in front of the car, I take his hand and lead him past one of the sumptuous mansions, which offers a perfect view of the sleeping city.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVE0cZ3Mv48
— I know you’re not in good spirits and I understand perfectly why, I assure him. I also know that you're waiting until you're alone to read Haley's letter. But I'm not going to let you do it, I don't want you to be upset, alone, in your corner while I'm worrying about you. Please, Jessy, do this for me. I'm not asking you to read it, I just want you to read it in my presence because whatever you think about it, you're going to need support afterwards and I want to be the one to hug you to make sure that everything will be alright.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb5Obpg2XnE
With tears in his eyes, he nods.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgsPH0oKCs
I move a few steps away to give him his privacy. He takes out the envelope, hesitates for a few seconds then opens it. From the first words he reads, I perceive the change in his expression, he seems to be decomposing. Quickly, I see tears rolling down his cheeks while I hold myself back from going to join him because I feel so bad for him. A few seconds later, he stops reading, leans over to lean on the safety barrier as a loud sob escapes him. I can no longer resist and will hug him. My arms are around his neck, my face on his shoulder.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLgvQ7S8eWt
I'm here, Jessy, I'm here, I whisper in his ear.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSIhejPVDo0
He stands up, turns around and hugs me as if I were the only thing holding him back on earth.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdh74zkfjlJ
— Here, he said, handing me the letter.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7MSdUKckof
— No, it’s meant for you.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZcJSfYHHU
— I don't want to hide anything from you about Haley, not after what you admitted to me earlier.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA3X2MG9Wti
Although it bothers me, I grab the paper.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6WvIpahDlQ
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBQwhXFr4T5
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVbaz8MFIKO
Jessy, 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs1DWa7d8hi
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If you are reading this it is because I will no longer be here to speak to you in person. It’s also that you are looking for answers to your questions, explanations. I will try to answer it.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjh8JoM7GLW
First of all, I wanted to tell you that I am deeply sorry for having infected you. If I had known that I was carrying this virus, I would never have hit on you that evening. As I told you during that famous evening, I wasn't looking for anything serious, yet when I saw you, I liked you straight away. If I left so quickly once we slept together, it was because I could have had feelings for you and coming out of a difficult relationship, I didn't want that.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpKPpy4JiCF
If you are wondering how I became HIV positive, it was precisely this ex that I had such a hard time forgetting who infected me after cheating on me. He didn't know he was sick either.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡProZ381W6P
As I write these words to you, I am in the hospital. I don't think I'll get through it. I'm not telling you this to inspire pity, but to tell you that I pray that you never experience the same thing. I sincerely hope that medicine finds a cure before the virus manifests itself. In no case did I want to condemn you to live in this hell, neither you nor the two other boys whom I also infected.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl996LuVhWq
I'm going to leave consumed with guilt. I pray that God forgives me, that you will be able to forgive me one day.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOCqAY34OEl
425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6p0U3Xz5A3
Haley 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYGFeWgp8yv
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These words upset me because they seem so sincere to me. I turn to Jessy who has wiped his eyes but still seems disturbed.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzBC6XOkOaV
— How are you feeling ? I ask him.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLpvwwnoH7
— Sad and relieved at the same time. In fact, I feel like life will never give me any gifts and that every one of my hopes will be disappointed.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgRCr9ZthV
— You are wrong, Jessy. You see that ? I point to Millisky lit up in front of us. This is your life today. It is no longer a dark alley in Allentown, nor even a state of the art residence in which many misfortunes hide. No, your life is here now. As for your future, I don't know what it will be like, just as I don't know my future, but there is one thing I am certain of : I will be with you.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVqxUIXagXN
He leans towards me, I kiss him full on the mouth. This time he kisses me back forcefully. His body presses against mine, making me shiver. From my lips, he lets his mouth slide slowly down to my neck. I savor this kiss, this desire that pushes me to want him ever closer to me. Then he takes my mouth again with a mixture of tenderness and eagerness. With the tip of his tongue, he parts my lips, his tongue caresses mine while he sucks in my breath. No boy, no even Chad has never kissed me like that. I feel faint in his arms, my legs have difficulty supporting me. He moves slightly away from me, staring at me. I can read in his eyes that I won this first battle, he regained faith in life, in my love for him. For the first time since I've known him, he's happy.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyEtfYRtHiz
Behind us, in the house, the group Divinyls can be heard with their songI’m on your side. 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTLkZ2c11hn
— Miss Crawfords, will you give me this dance ? 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡebtK5BKZI7
He holds out his hand to me. 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq1e9Zc3710
— With pleasure.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRINYk7zvgq
« I’m on your side 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMV8VydjUho
You know I’m not the enemy. » 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLmEOeK3Dph
It's not hot tonight, but sheltered in Jessy's arms, I'm not cold.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9922DYGaqa
« I love you, babe » rises in the silence of the night.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6ePhWUFYW
Jessy moves back a few inches and looks at me with a mischievous smile.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3sjUFL64Xc
— So in the end, who won ? The heart or the reason ? He asks me, quoting the words of the clairvoyant.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX5UsU255da
– You are the heart, you always have been, I answer him forcefully.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ92gpMRIYCR
« I’ll hold on to you. » 425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjogs39QBQn
This is how, snuggled in each other’s arms, the music rocks us.425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTtyzWwMsxl
« I love you babe, I love you babe, I’m on your side. »425Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxrkfGWDNv
