When Maverick and I are having the amount of fun we are right now, dancing, matching shots, in our own little world...sometimes I forget that only reason we are so happy is because we're drunk or high. In this case, we're both.
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No matter where I'm at, if he is there, I feel at home...like in a house full of people only he knows.
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I find it odd that given how little friends Maverick claims he has, many people here at this party know him on somewhat of a personal level. One guy approached us telling him that he'd text him where to meet Friday night. Another man referenced to a time they had previously hung out. Being a bit too cross faded, if anything actually important was said in any of Maverick's conversations, I missed it.
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I'm left confused.
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How exactly does he know these people? What could he possibly have to do with grown men in his free time?
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It all makes me realize that I have no idea what Maverick is up to when I'm not around. It's almost like there's an entirely different life he's living and he's made it a point to keep me in the dark about it. I guess I never put much thought into it until tonight.
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"So are you two like together?" A girl asks from next to me, motioning to Maverick who is talking to someone on my other side.
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I shake my head. "We're friends." I answer before knocking my shot back.
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Before I can question why she is asking, a smile reaches her face.
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"Oh that's good!" She beams, waving a hand as if I should forget she even asked in the first place.
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Before I can ask why that's a good thing to her, she answers on her own.
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"I have this friend named Brittany. Her and Maverick have been kinda hanging out or whatever they're calling it." She giggles, hiding her mouth behind her hand. "Anyways, she would've been pissed if I told her he brought a date with him. So that's why I asked. Is it awful that I wish you would've said yes?"
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Who the fuck is Brittany?
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"It's not like I want her to be with him." The girl says as she leans in with a lower tone. "He's awful." She nods her head slowly as she says those two words "I mean, it's not like he's rude to her." She points a finger around the kitchen, in a half circle, motioning to partygoers as she says, "It's everyone else...and what he does."
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Part of me wants to tell this girl to shut up, that she talks way too much, especially towards someone she's never met before. Then again, the other part of me wants her to tell me more, all the things she somehow knows about Maverick that I don't.
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"What he does?" I arch an eyebrow.
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The girl laughs, giving me an odd expression. "Aren't you supposed to be the one who's friends with him?" Gossip seems more important than wondering any further as she continues with, "He thinks we all believe he just sells drugs with Malachi but we all know it's more than that."
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"Avery." Mavericks voice sounds from back behind my shoulder, addressing the loose lipped girl.
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I glance back at him, seeing his eyes flicker down towards me before back at the girl.
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"Maverick!" Avery says in a fake shocked way, hands flying in the air other side of her before dropping them back down. "I didn't even know you were there!"
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"Sure you didn't." He remarks sarcastically. "What could you possibly have to say to Lilliana?"
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"I thought she was alone!" She defends herself with a cheeky smile. "Like maybe she could use a friend!" She then shrugs and adds; "Obviously she hasn't been given the best options."
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She lies to him smoothly but it's evident that Maverick won't buy a thing she says. The mutual lack of respect the two have for one another is prominent.
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"Keep it moving, Avery." Maverick orders. I can sense him nodding in the direction he wants her to go.
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Avery gives me one last look before turning and disappearing into the crowd.
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The silence between Maverick and I is thick, not like the usual comfortable silence we sit in. It's uncomfortable, tense. There's an elephant in the room and he's already aware of it.
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I've never found myself caring about who, where, or when Maverick has sex with someone. I've never been jealous, more so indifferent about it; he's my best friend, after all. The difference this time is that he is 'hanging out' with the bitch multiple times when typically, he only sleeps with someone once.
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Though right now, there's a pit forming in my stomach, forcing nausea upon me. There's an anger building as I wonder more and more about this Brittany.
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To be honest, the fact that my mind is far past altered, is making me want to go off on Maverick.
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"Lilliana."
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I hadn't noticed Maverick move to stand in front of me. He's staring down at me with a hesitancy about him.
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"Who the fuck is Brittany?" I find myself asking before my mind can tell my mouth not to.
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His hand raises, going to scratch the back of his neck which is the ultimate evidence that he's been caught. His gaze moves to the ceiling as if picking out the right words in his head.
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"Brittany..." He trails off as if trying to remember who she is.
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"Don't do that, Maverick." I warn, narrowing my eyes. "Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about."
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He glances in the direction Avery had left. "What did she tell you?" He asks as he returns his gaze to me.
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My eyes narrow even more. "Don't worry about that. Who is she? And why haven't you told me about her? Is everything a secret with you?"
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Maverick holds a hand up between us. "Wait a minute." His eyebrows draw together. "Are you seriously mad at me for hanging out with someone? Is that what is happening right now?"
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My eyes widen as I ask in a 'duh' tone, "Don't you mean fucking her?"
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"So you are." He nods for a moment before a chuckle escapes his lips. "I wasn't keeping it from you to piss you off, Lilliana. It was because I don't mention a girl unless I'm serious about it. And I don't know if I am or not yet."
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His words go in one ear and out the other, annoyance taking over.
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"You've never had sex with someone more than once." I remind him. "That sounds pretty fucking serious to me."
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Maverick shakes his head, a hint of a grin on his lips as he scratches his jaw.
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"You're dazed, Lilliana." He tells me. "I'll explain this tomorrow when we're sober."
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When you're sober.
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"That doesn't matter." I roll my eyes. "Let's talk about it right now!"
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Maverick looks around us, making me realize I've raised my voice quite a bit, gaining some attention from the people around us in the kitchen.
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So he takes me by my upper arm, weaving us through the bodies and exiting to the hallway. He opens the door to the bathroom, giving me the slightest shove inside before closing the door behind us.
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He crosses his arms over his chest, looking down at my glaring form. "I'm still not sure what you're so angry about."
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I'm still not sure why I'm so angry either but rational thinking clearly isn't on my to-do list tonight.
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"Why are you all of a sudden sleeping with someone numerous times?" I question, crossing my own arms over my chest. "And not telling me about it? We tell each other about everyone, Maverick. What the hell is so special about this girl?"
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He gives a nonchalant shrug, looking around the bathroom as if there's anything interesting in it. "She's cool. I like her." He admits.
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There's the jealousy.
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His words a like a punch to the gut, making that nauseous feeling worse.
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I choose not to dive into that, doing my best to shake the feeling away.
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"So instead of hanging out with me, you go hangout with Brittany who is so much cooler." I say in a mocking tone before scoffing. "That's real nice, Maverick."
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A suspicious expression forms on his face as he asks, "You expect me to only spend time with you? Why can't it be as simple as you're both cool and both my friends?"
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"Well you haven't given any sign that you want to fuck me!"
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My eyes widen as the words leave my mouth, jaw clamping shut. Another silence falls, only the sound of the muffled music coming from the walls fills the bathroom.
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Why did I just say that? What is wrong with me? I'm just highly disoriented right now, that's all. I'm not thinking straight and I'm spewing nonsense.
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As he opens his mouth to speak, I hold up a finger, interrupting him. "I did not just say that, Maverick. You were right;" I shrug, sticking out my tongue and making a ridiculous face. "I'm too fucking loaded right now and have no idea what I'm saying." I take a step towards the door as I tell him in agreement, "Let's talk about it tomorrow."
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Mavericks hand covers the handle before I can get to it, making me take a step back with a load groan.
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"Now that matters?" He asks with satisfied smile. "You're well enough minded right now to tell me you don't know what you're saying." He then points out.
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I roll my eyes, looking over at the wall to ignore the annoying smile he sporting.
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"You're jealous, Lilliana."
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"Fuck you. I'm not jealous." I retort quickly with a glare. "I don't know why I said that." I raise my eyebrows as a sign for him to drop it. "Okay, Maverick?"
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"You wish it was you I was fucking, Liliana?"
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I can't help but to meet his gaze when he asks this, never having heard him talk like that before. Maverick has always had a dominance about him, but he never expressed it in this way.
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Studying him closer, I can see just how dilated his pupils are. He's more than likely far past my point of fucked up.
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"Stop it." I tell him, but I don't really sound like I want him to.
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"I didn't start it." He replies. "Don't worry, I'm just fucking with you. I know you didn't mean it how you said it." He sighs. "You're probably worried that it'll take away from my time I spend with you. But it won't. You're my best friend." He's adds, giving my arm a pat.
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He's literally speaking for me but it's getting me out of this situation so I just play along.
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"I'm so glad you understand." I give a fake sigh of relief. "I reacted a little crazy."
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Seeing Maverick's hand push down the handle, I stop him. "Wait."
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His hand released the handle slowly, closing and locking the door back.
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"You didn't tell me you were selling with Malachi." I call him out, almost forgetting to do so after getting aggressively jealous.
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Maverick grunts, mumbling; "Fucking Avery" under his breath. "You don't need to know everything, Lilliana. I keep some things to myself for a reason."
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"So you preach to me about how dangerous he is just to do the shit with him?" I question. "Which I hear is more than what y'all lead on."
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"What's that mean?" He asks through a sigh, acting as if he's bored of the conversation.
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"You tell me..." I put my hands on my hips. "What else do you and Malachi do for money, Maverick?"
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He stares as if contemplating his answer.
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"You're about to lie to me."
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"No." He states before pausing, forming a grin. "I'm not going to lie to you. I'm just not going to answer you."
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I glared at the back of his head and he turns, opening the door and exiting the bathroom.
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