
-免責聲明:故事內容涉及以人類加入妖怪食物鏈情節,純粹以現時生物學生態類比,只屬幻想與虛構,如有雷同實屬巧合 - 140Please respect copyright.PENANABOphv0Mah8
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「冚家鏟!」我一時忍唔住,爆左句粗。140Please respect copyright.PENANAtmy8tBWNhN
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因為同行既「人」又死左一個。今次又係咁,得返我一個。140Please respect copyright.PENANAn9YNZxusKN
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「人類真係好撚兒嬉架喎。」我用手抹一抹剛剛隊友條頸,試一試味。唔好浪費呀嘛。140Please respect copyright.PENANAv1vN57zOm5
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我左手按動衛星電話,打一打比我老闆先。140Please respect copyright.PENANAXSKofnfB0U
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「全隊死哂,要求徹退。」我拎住支紙飲管,準備吸血。今次真係「吸血」喇。140Please respect copyright.PENANAUTL0MOQgIs
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「...」老闆停頓足足3秒咁耐。140Please respect copyright.PENANAYwnEMIaZz6
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「...你唔搞掂呢個就無糧出。」老闆繼續講。140Please respect copyright.PENANAdN08TtN5A0
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屌你老母。考察呢樣野根本就唔應該比人類做,一係就應該搵AI做,一係就搵Indiana Jones做,即係搞鳩我je而家。140Please respect copyright.PENANAeyaQNXo8aW
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搵食真係好撚艱難。140Please respect copyright.PENANAKn7anm3a67
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是咁的,140Please respect copyright.PENANAt002CPBorp
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我係一個燥底的吸血鬼。140Please respect copyright.PENANAMA30KJ1OFu
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講起上黎,點解我會做左吸血鬼?講起就我就扯火啦。話說十年前有晚,我落老蘭溝女,識左個鬼佬。個鬼佬幾好人既。不過你地知啦,落得club既,識個鬼佬當然用黎拉social proof架姐!當晚我靠呢件鬼佬的確多左好多女埋身。140Please respect copyright.PENANAPJ1GCxC7uz
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果晚我睇中左條女,打撚哂車輪,準備帶條女走去爆房。點知條痴線鬼佬就無啦啦走出黎追住我,好似想郁鳩我。咁我梗係走啦,唔知點解佢又捉鳩到我喎!140Please respect copyright.PENANA1QMmMXKIsZ
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「點呀?睇中左你條女係咪呀?」我對住鬼佬大叫。140Please respect copyright.PENANAvhpae5qtE3
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「You !are idiot!」個鬼佬捉到我實。140Please respect copyright.PENANAqcOecBsKmd
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我當時好危險,生命受到威脅。我只記得我常時醉醉地,我都開始唔知做緊乜春。好似對住個鬼佬狂出拳,一路打一路笑。第朝起身,先知原來個仆街鬼佬咬鳩我條頸喎,我屌呀!140Please respect copyright.PENANAyCCj4KW8J1
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一開始以為係d 基佬搞鳩我屎忽搞到成床血,不過好像屎眼又無事。140Please respect copyright.PENANAWd9qLvBDdT
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我成身血,又忽冷忽熱咁,隔離條女仲慘過我,全身慘白色,眼神驚恐,郁都唔郁。140Please respect copyright.PENANADrvLUzjes4
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係,佢真係死撚左。140Please respect copyright.PENANArT4ah2yrc0
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就係咁,我就做左吸血鬼喇。:o)140Please respect copyright.PENANAeqkobxgN2a
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係呀,唔洗問點解。我自己都有過個鬼佬,佢都係咁答:「點記得點解,屌。」140Please respect copyright.PENANAHwgIljgDKH
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係呀,十年後既鬼佬已經講緊好流利既廣東話。140Please respect copyright.PENANAer5FT664ZR
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唔記得介紹呀鬼佬tim,佢全名叫Victor Blackwood,不過我平時叫佢做鬼佬。吸血兒+鬼佬,直接叫吸血鬼佬,幾好,慳返隻字。140Please respect copyright.PENANAOmuY26T0UF
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sor,比你睇緊字既已經係10年前既人,d gag係爛少少。140Please respect copyright.PENANAoVcF9rhPst
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講返啦,其實變吸血鬼個過程唔算好難好辛苦,不過令我最困擾既,係我日日比人恥笑。140Please respect copyright.PENANAi69Q2fwNqP
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「喂,死傻仔!!」有個契弟拍我個頭。140Please respect copyright.PENANAFf9QwTcK5H
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係人都知啦,香港地,邊有咁多吸血鬼架?全香港我諗得20隻吸血鬼,有一半都係鬼佬黎。另一半九成都係佢地d SP,有男有女。(得返一個正常人,就係我。)140Please respect copyright.PENANACO3TPq37iB
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班鬼佬,一係就外國黎香港玩果d遊客,少部分就係英殖時代黎香港住到而家,SP就無定條件既,咩人都做得。講到尾係班鬼佬沉船,咪變佢地做吸血鬼囉。仲有幾個,應該係共用針筒咪中左招變出黎。平時你地行街見到有d扮乞衣既道友,又好耐無死到,其實就係佢地黎。因為佢地不死身,本身又爛泥扶唔上柄,所以會一日到黑條條街度hea。至於我呢D本土香港仔,會無啦啦做左吸血鬼既,我諗除左我之外,都無另一個本土製作吸血鬼囉。140Please respect copyright.PENANAxUzXYRfrUj
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至於點解我會比人恥笑?因為吸血鬼族本身都係外來種族,香港本身就已經好多地膽係度。吸血鬼只係少數,真係要行埋一邊。頭先拍我個頭條撚樣,就係香港殭屍。殭屍係香港好撚耐架啦,由清朝到家陣,都唔知住左幾hi多年。佢地同吸血鬼唔多岩牙的,主要因為大家撞左食物鏈,我地要既食物一鳩樣,都係要吸人血,佢地會話鳩我地搶佢地d食物。我地識飛,佢地只係識跳得好高。同埋佢地好多都爛面,唔知點解。我地就皮膚白少少,無血色姐,又未至於爛面。可能基因唔同掛。140Please respect copyright.PENANAhu0t8iV1hU
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「屌你呀!」我舉手中指比人殭屍仆街仔,然後即刻用我最快速度著草。下次見到佢真係想郁柒佢。最多咪坐監!呀唔係喎,我地非人類應該唔洗坐...140Please respect copyright.PENANAvsvLsOnnAD
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