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-免責聲明：故事內容涉及以人類加入妖怪食物鏈情節，純粹以現時生物學生態類比，只屬幻想與虛構，如有雷同實屬巧合 - 140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7crBSg07gn
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「冚家鏟！」我一時忍唔住，爆左句粗。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpneBVnl0QF
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因為同行既「人」又死左一個。今次又係咁，得返我一個。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXr79vjt10W
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「人類真係好撚兒嬉架喎。」我用手抹一抹剛剛隊友條頸，試一試味。唔好浪費呀嘛。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9K04CwbSl
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我左手按動衛星電話，打一打比我老闆先。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTe1B1bxDvY
140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9DaCtBrZPM
「全隊死哂，要求徹退。」我拎住支紙飲管，準備吸血。今次真係「吸血」喇。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkcFQTAcsNg
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「...」老闆停頓足足3秒咁耐。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU2pLzsAFiw
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「...你唔搞掂呢個就無糧出。」老闆繼續講。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCWesryvxCm
140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOft4t6UDiq
屌你老母。考察呢樣野根本就唔應該比人類做，一係就應該搵AI做，一係就搵Indiana Jones做，即係搞鳩我je而家。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsRzRHugHCm
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搵食真係好撚艱難。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFu0vZQmTbl
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==========================================================================140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6MiBIwFpg8
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是咁的，140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoVozJFFuE4
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我係一個燥底的吸血鬼。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5ph8oa4gvL
140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡas5IcN5QDs
講起上黎，點解我會做左吸血鬼？講起就我就扯火啦。話說十年前有晚，我落老蘭溝女，識左個鬼佬。個鬼佬幾好人既。不過你地知啦，落得club既，識個鬼佬當然用黎拉social proof架姐！當晚我靠呢件鬼佬的確多左好多女埋身。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtBUqIKzEy3
140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwCWgAqJRPG
果晚我睇中左條女，打撚哂車輪，準備帶條女走去爆房。點知條痴線鬼佬就無啦啦走出黎追住我，好似想郁鳩我。咁我梗係走啦，唔知點解佢又捉鳩到我喎！140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡddvtNbcTWZ
140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlXwDNHig6e
「點呀？睇中左你條女係咪呀？」我對住鬼佬大叫。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEP4MSxMe72
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「You ！are idiot！」個鬼佬捉到我實。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3tYWYaVKRP
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我當時好危險，生命受到威脅。我只記得我常時醉醉地，我都開始唔知做緊乜春。好似對住個鬼佬狂出拳，一路打一路笑。第朝起身，先知原來個仆街鬼佬咬鳩我條頸喎，我屌呀！140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkKxgDhHi7r
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一開始以為係d 基佬搞鳩我屎忽搞到成床血，不過好像屎眼又無事。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcRNNdH4CRB
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我成身血，又忽冷忽熱咁，隔離條女仲慘過我，全身慘白色，眼神驚恐，郁都唔郁。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡakHpi3dwFs
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係，佢真係死撚左。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeSs8qHfVJs
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就係咁，我就做左吸血鬼喇。:o)140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDz9AcWpdqg
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係呀，唔洗問點解。我自己都有過個鬼佬，佢都係咁答：「點記得點解，屌。」140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5oqsh3ryqJ
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係呀，十年後既鬼佬已經講緊好流利既廣東話。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtIcs5sxYMA
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唔記得介紹呀鬼佬tim，佢全名叫Victor Blackwood，不過我平時叫佢做鬼佬。吸血兒+鬼佬，直接叫吸血鬼佬，幾好，慳返隻字。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ4KImfMdtu
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sor，比你睇緊字既已經係10年前既人，d gag係爛少少。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsq04dvYbnJ
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講返啦，其實變吸血鬼個過程唔算好難好辛苦，不過令我最困擾既，係我日日比人恥笑。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZw9H6fiqwU
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「喂，死傻仔！！」有個契弟拍我個頭。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1AQMLNIi1W
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係人都知啦，香港地，邊有咁多吸血鬼架？全香港我諗得20隻吸血鬼，有一半都係鬼佬黎。另一半九成都係佢地d SP，有男有女。（得返一個正常人，就係我。）140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNysfF3tLr1
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班鬼佬，一係就外國黎香港玩果d遊客，少部分就係英殖時代黎香港住到而家，SP就無定條件既，咩人都做得。講到尾係班鬼佬沉船，咪變佢地做吸血鬼囉。仲有幾個，應該係共用針筒咪中左招變出黎。平時你地行街見到有d扮乞衣既道友，又好耐無死到，其實就係佢地黎。因為佢地不死身，本身又爛泥扶唔上柄，所以會一日到黑條條街度hea。至於我呢D本土香港仔，會無啦啦做左吸血鬼既，我諗除左我之外，都無另一個本土製作吸血鬼囉。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNqGWUEeqaS
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至於點解我會比人恥笑？因為吸血鬼族本身都係外來種族，香港本身就已經好多地膽係度。吸血鬼只係少數，真係要行埋一邊。頭先拍我個頭條撚樣，就係香港殭屍。殭屍係香港好撚耐架啦，由清朝到家陣，都唔知住左幾hi多年。佢地同吸血鬼唔多岩牙的，主要因為大家撞左食物鏈，我地要既食物一鳩樣，都係要吸人血，佢地會話鳩我地搶佢地d食物。我地識飛，佢地只係識跳得好高。同埋佢地好多都爛面，唔知點解。我地就皮膚白少少，無血色姐，又未至於爛面。可能基因唔同掛。140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡflnyz71nrJ
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「屌你呀！」我舉手中指比人殭屍仆街仔，然後即刻用我最快速度著草。下次見到佢真係想郁柒佢。最多咪坐監！呀唔係喎，我地非人類應該唔洗坐...140Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH6WWHqa3Hf
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