So, rather recently I've had this thought ambling around in the back of my mind. It's a thought that everyone has. It's a fear everyone has. This thought is something you never hope to be included in. This has just been stuck in my head for a while, I wanted to just get it out there.1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcoGwtZA608
You see, there is a point in which everyone becomes second. There is a point in which someone else matters more. This point is what I like to call the Push Point. It is the point where you being to be pushed away. It is a point were you no longer seem to matter. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjICCHzh9Tr
I feel like I am always at this point. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5fB3IVqwsH
I am the person who is second by nature and first, well, hardly ever. In people's minds, I suppose, I am someone who is replaceable. To lose me is to only fill that empty space with another me. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLznjkZtWwx
I wonder, am I so generic that I can so easily be replaced? 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8SxZbI9e0U
And God-forbid I speak up about my position or I really will be replaced. It feels like I don't matter enough. Do I have to be some kind of eccentric person to be accepted? Must I make myself more interesting and flattering to the eye? Do I have to change myself just to seem amazing enough to keep around?1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNzXbo54FgG
Is that what people want nowadays? 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiUBESIoEMF
You know, I don't think I've ever really had a best friend. I've never been first, no one has ever chosen me for anything. I'm second-best. I have fair-weather friends who only want me when there is nothing better to do. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq54zQhT1jp
My feelings don't matter to them. Only they do. They want help with their lives when I'm stuck with "I'm sorry". In todays society, I feel like we, as people, are being less and less in-tune with other people's feelings. The generations now seem to only care for themselves. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrgTm6xGaOq
Maybe I'm being a hypocrite, I am apart of said generation. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNhSkjfg6T
But I want to be cared for and loved so badly I can't stand it. Family is obligated to love me. I want someone who choses to. Maybe I'm being selfish and too egotistical about myself. I should feel lucky to have the family and "friends" that I have now. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIZTGL10Rgw
But, I'm not. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoIOOdtIyxt
I guess its a human flaw: we always want more. We are never comfortable with what we already have. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPygzrw0ZcI
I complain a lot, it seems. Maybe I just have a lot to complain about or maybe I just need to be grateful for what I have. I know I'm not the only one. 1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZoRrkqhPN7
- Ayame1104Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKZSWKLGgZf
