Eli throws himself back in his chair, one hand to his head and the other limp across the chair’s arm. The box falls out of his grip and clatters on the wooden floor. His grandmother’s ring pops out of the box and skitters away from him. The diamonds taunt him in the moonlight.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXVgzAaoKkt
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2M65i7tmwk
“We can’t do this,” Mari said gently, curling his hand over the ring.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsQJJy82rPV
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV7MjZn1vkT
The memory makes him shudder. Good thing he did it alone rather than in a crowded location as he was originally planning to.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡagedKjk3BI
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6ixKe4Nxd
“I love you,” he said.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3MFgZ1qVE
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdImtNXCyUF
“I love you too.” She stared at the flame of the candle between them. “But…how can we get married when you aren’t old enough to drink at your own bachelor party? Are we supposed to pop open a bottle of apple cider?”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJHfZ1rCweh
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMYAo0Yj272
“I didn’t know drinking was that important to you,” he said stiffly, running his pinky along the rim of his water glass.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcc3ypnQkaM
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7sRl1Wy4uy
“It isn’t that,” Mari said. “It’s what being able to drink represents.”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMdcaBq89tu
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEI7jnF9QHi
“And what’s that?” he asked, knowing he wasn’t helping his case by sounding like a petulant child.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJwtntIZMP4
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8OyLt4fPA3
“That you’re an adult,” she said, reaching across the table to put a hand to his cheek. “Which you aren’t yet.”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkOi3gdZwcj
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWfT7eraZXE
“That’s not what you said last night,” Eli muttered.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXaY2812Lbz
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWaUFoRjpUg
She shot him a look and her smile melted away. “I love you, Eli. You know that. But we can’t get married. At the very least, we can’t get married right now.”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwaEnlnhdyM
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTulcRX0MVY
The table is still set for dinner, even though Mari has long since left. The ice in her water glass has melted. He can still smell the candle wax.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmJ6alg6DHR
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrskz6JI9jM
Mari wanted to go to the Epik High concert even more than Eli did. Or rather, Eli wanted to go but had to accept the fact that he couldn’t afford to do everything while studying full-time and working part-time at the university bookstore. But Mari wanted to do everything.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQez8ikMlB
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡed8A2jBmpm
“I can’t go to the concert,” he told her.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRtYtplMFAl
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEF30wejl20
She bought him a ticket anyway, telling him, “It isn’t a big deal.”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKH1ZGsONvY
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GWhiNdzJc
It’s always been like that. She casually buys him a ticket to something and doesn’t think twice about it. For him, however, each event she pays for becomes a brick on his back. He can’t imagine she’s as fine with it as she seems to be.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOErK8IABqs
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtG5LNu2Xm6
He has never been sure what bothers him more—being a burden on her or the fact that she isn’t honest about how she feels, that she pretends it’s okay that she has to keep paying for him.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6yqQsmTUH0
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY15c6Nt7bb
Eli gets up, leaving the ring where it is on the floor and goes out to the balcony. He leans his forearms on the cold metal railing and leans forward, staring up at the sky. His favorite thing about living in a college town is that he can actually see the stars—especially since his apartment is at the top of the hill.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj5A1gnW3Yw
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrioZt6pm6B
He drops his gaze down toward the school and can even see Bell Hall, the building with the lab where Mari works. There are some lights on, although he’s fairly certain Mari isn’t there right now. She’s probably soaking in a hot bath—probably reading to calm her nerves after rejecting Eli’s proposal.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0t9bY2EcRL
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV44PYrmWjm
He grips the railing and leans back, eyes turned upward again. The night breeze pushes his hair off his forehead.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJGBKhiJ9ey
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHg9DJSeBm
He went to the lab with her once, but only once. Mari had needed to stop by and start an experiment before they headed out on a date. He had trailed in after her, wanting to see what she did and just wanting to be in her presence.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5CSxTCnVUT
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCXrf2gVWSK
One of her coworkers stopped by to talk to her and glanced at Eli questioningly.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFHAJzYOLFT
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡooebKXDv5N
“Alan, this is my boyfriend, Eli,” Mari said.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCPMYiYeRyk
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHjkHjYUHCL
“So, Eli, what do you do?” Alan said as they shook hands.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SIuID53U1
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8b4EuZUAAA
“Are you really going to pester my boyfriend right now?” Mari said, taking Eli’s arm and tried to pull him away.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxkAZRb5P9
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOgtMEvDt9
“Pester him? I’m just trying to be polite,” Alan said. “Is his job top secret or something?”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmqwY0FKY2P
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg4o02bjcWw
Mari’s lips were pressed together. Clearly she had never told her coworkers she’d met her boyfriend while she was a graduate student T.A. for his undergrad biochem class.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡErDVhFay0f
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuZaNc7mgsd
“I’m a student,” Eli said, suddenly wanting to leave the lab and head out to their movie.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTGVTyiDPTG
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpplWXyuPeq
“PhD? What do you study?” Alan said.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqdkDTt2ii
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Q7tTG7HUw
“No, not a PhD student,” Eli said, his neck and cheeks starting to heat up. He couldn’t meet Mari’s gaze.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrrZP3ndnMZ
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsVykX6YPnj
“Oh, Master’s then?” 756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzoUZzQyDO
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8IDkFurB5
“Actually, I’m an undergrad,” Eli said.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwF5zF2BF0X
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlzuSa7Br7l
“Oh.” Alan looked at Mari and then back at Eli. “Well, it was good to meet you, man.”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3HO0ZnQQ48
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2dKxLzAlc
Eli followed Mari in silence. He could feel something like embarrassment or shame rising off of her, but she turned around and placed a hand on his forearm, forcing a gentle smile.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQX4nsnWOe
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkkPRQfCwrM
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “This is just because of your age. One day, you’ll catch up to me—maybe even pass me—and it won’t matter. We’ll forget there was ever a time like this.”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL4XZA6P67E
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLqeNWMBNUF
Eli sighs. Crickets chirp in time with the twinkling of the stars. As he stares up absently, a giant meteor falls. He watches it streak across the sky, getting brighter and brighter and brighter until the blazing light fills the sky, fills his vision, fills his mind.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡllvp9ZOQGS
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEu2FyCeG1b
He blinks. He’s in the living room of an apartment. There are no lights on, and the time reads 2:57 a.m. on a digital clock with green numbers—just around the time he was standing outside. 756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSUKVYYQwzC
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTfcwj1fZ50
He realizes with surprise that there’s something in his hand. It’s a piece of a rock. He would think it’s a dream, but the rock smells like metal and fire. It’s warm. Eli brings it to his face. 756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ9Hcp2yWU3
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjOyGjv4qQ2
He doesn’t see how it’s possible, but he wonders if it’s a part of a meteor—maybe the meteor he just saw.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHPYvzBovQY
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP58u4fXwqO
He surveys the apartment. It’s bland and undecorated, but the wooden dining table seems ready to splinter under the weight of open textbooks and notebooks. A closed MacBook charges, precariously close to a half-finished mug of coffee. Eli leans forward and looks at the notebook, immediately recognizing the handwriting.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDL6OcmzwZn
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKzSgkcrMLL
It isn’t possible.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyIOUv0T17a
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQfwkYwBIV7
He glances toward a closed door that he assumes is a bedroom and makes his way over warily, quietly pushing it open. There’s a bed on the other side, up against the wall. Moonlight streams directly upon the sleeping form. Her back is turned, and even if it weren’t for the dark hair ribboning across the pillow, he still would have recognized her.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS5R2LROkba
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMeFekfixTR
He creeps closer—she’s a notoriously light sleeper—and takes a better look. She shifts in her sleep slightly, as though she can sense she has a visitor. And then he sees her face. Mari looks pretty much the same as she did when he saw her a few hours ago, only more vulnerable. There are streaks of lavender in her hair, starting at her scalp and traveling out. Her bangs are shorter, settling on her closed eyelids. There’s still a hint of baby softness that hasn’t yet melted away to reveal the sultry cheekbones in the Mari he loves.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1iH90bBpxa
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdSzN9bHJEZ
Eli presses a button on her phone, illuminating the screen, to see the date. Five years ago to the day.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2uMIqu39f5
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX9pzaGl95A
If this is right, if this isn’t a dream of some sort, he’s seeing her when she was the same age as he is now. He looks at the meteor, still in his hand. He isn’t sure how he knows this, but he’s suddenly sure the meteor was his ticket here and will be his ticket back to his year.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRbP6ck34x7
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcdpADkTz9U
But he has an idea. Now that he’s here, why not stay? He’ll age with her, and she will no longer be five years older than him. He’ll make it work, somehow—find a way to survive as a twenty-year-old in this year, stage a run-in with her. She’ll fall in love with him again, but they’ll be on equal ground.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5YJWTsQxCx
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbqZg5AKx5X
Sliding the little meteor piece into his pocket, he takes a deep breath, excitement mounting at the thought of starting again with her at the same age—even if she is still a month older. They’ll have five more years together than they would have otherwise.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnht3M9H3Aj
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdxN3YinOAM
“Is this really want you want?” Mari asked him multiple times, a shrewd look on her face. “With me five years older than you, you do realize things might need to happen five years faster than you want them to, right?”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh8Y7MEfkJ8
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdBicB3aHe1
“Like what?” he said.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnpZ8wx5K6J
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEAi11ntoa
“Getting married, having kids,” she said.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRlaq1MLhpV
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJiY1lBzAyU
“Well, good thing you warned me about it now,” Eli said. “Now I’m mentally prepared.”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1R88vgkD7Z
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN927d9SU0K
“Seriously, though,” she said. “Don’t you want someone your age?”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Xl576pnW3
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ZuyY2mHz5
Eli sits cross-legged on the floor beside her bed, deflating instantly. If he stays here isn’t he finding someone his own age. He told her he didn’t care about their age difference. And he doesn’t, really. He presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, feeling a little dizzy as if he just got off a rollercoaster.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYEQQ7z5vlo
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh35jhD0hnr
“I can’t believe you’ve never ridden a rollercoaster before,” Eli said.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7IuEUrk5kc
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaLqGPUhFCA
Mari gripped his hand, her nails digging into his skin. Her eyes were wide, focused on the car that sped by thunderously. The riders’ screams seemed to hover in the air behind them.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cwRbOVMTh
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7x00SmUCQ
“Well,” she said. “I guess this is all part of our goal of making new memories together.”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDGlR4geoPO
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡybu350gxdK
This Mari sleeping in front of him doesn’t have that memory of riding the rollercoaster with him. She doesn’t have any of the memories they’ve created over the past two years. The situation would be unbalanced with him knowing her soul even as she tries to discover his.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLcnzWx44Z8
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcRlxUcBiyx
Eli takes the meteor out of his pocket. It seems like it’s getting warmer. He stands up and looks at her again, a little sad at the thought of a future that can never be. Taking his chance, he leans forward and presses a kiss to her forehead, just above her left eyebrow. Even five years ago, she used the smell shampoo she uses in the present.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7S5Cm9GJMr
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2hcbXdPQ2B
Mari stretches and blinks blearily at him. He knows she was almost blind pre-LASIK. This Mari can barely see anything without her glasses or contacts. He must be just a blonde-haired outline to her, too indistinct for her to even tell he’s Korean under that blonde hair.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBzohPH2qfN
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3vrbRDbexS
“Who are you?” she murmurs.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLpsZx3Ht1E
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmVMi1rJX7k
He thinks about it for a moment and speaks softly to keep from waking her up completely. “I’m someone you haven’t met yet—someone you’ll meet in the future and fall in love with, but not quite as deeply as I’ll fall in love with you.”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ07taeVMIag
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZ6GvAUeYo
“Why?” Her voice is still groggy, eyes half-closed.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD56pv2pXUi
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAZ1lOuD1bM
“Because I’m younger than you,” Eli says, gently putting a finger to her cheek. “It’ll bother you, and I think you won’t believe me when I say just how much I love you. But I love you, and only you, and especially you when you’re five years older than me. Don’t forget it, okay?”756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHVCth9oMRL
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWi2OgSgd8y
He holds his pinky out to her. She curves her own pinky around his. Her skin is almost as warm as the meteor.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQigRAT30TJ
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyLnoNdvLz
“Okay.” Her voice is nearly gone now as she sinks back into sleep.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCYuVA4n87Q
756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2IesWeQX3q
He holds the meteor in his palm as it burns more fiercely, watching this Mari and thinking about the Mari waiting for him back in his present.756Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ69gb1YhHM1
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