x
No Plagiarism!DLNYp0Tb4XGoOBzvXvzoposted on PENANA 狹窄的辦公室裡只有我們在鐵梯上上落落的聲音,以及紙皮箱觸地的悶響,我們一句話也沒有說,整個氛圍卻讓人感到很舒服,我不用擔心她在暗地裡抱怨我不想點話題,我們之間的沉默是如此地正常,沒有半點違和感——因為我們對於「說話」這回事,各自有著不同的障礙。8964 copyright protection587PENANAjDuH7trDQI 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA59hzfOhIDp
8964 copyright protection587PENANA8yZrOBTSnN 維尼
把最後一個紙皮箱搬完後,她給我一盒芒果汁。8964 copyright protection587PENANAmYcZOOTg20 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAJmAiLNbRkV
8964 copyright protection587PENANAw2fnM7XSTh 維尼
「你點知我鍾意飲架?」我把芒果汁接過。8964 copyright protection587PENANAPxXjgl0VOk 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAtBZRnUgDDo
8964 copyright protection587PENANAyJRFc1gmTl 維尼
(上次你外婆話我知。)8964 copyright protection587PENANA71f53reguh 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAZbMDFrY75E
8964 copyright protection587PENANASa9VjekYQG 維尼
「……多謝。」8964 copyright protection587PENANAueDEF5hr4D 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA7XuYnyYN2F
8964 copyright protection587PENANAiKI0DzdwCB 維尼
(放假都嚟陪外婆聽講座,你真係好乖。)8964 copyright protection587PENANAz6g8JpWM5V 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANABpkNFu90T6
8964 copyright protection587PENANAPjSfxIVhDc 維尼
「反正喺屋企都冇嘢做。」8964 copyright protection587PENANA3QvLVCHdRZ 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA3OkpiOW15d
8964 copyright protection587PENANAET2IkRsBTh 維尼
(唔約嗰個女仔出街?)8964 copyright protection587PENANAmzpl37ZPsP 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAsUtQxtAD6B
8964 copyright protection587PENANAttGcpDc791 維尼
我知道她在指星澄,便尷尬地笑了笑:「我搵唔到佢。」8964 copyright protection587PENANATJ0utYowUz 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAhU0uJZBiyw
8964 copyright protection587PENANABnXCQWDMPB 維尼
(點解?)8964 copyright protection587PENANALmhH8pMDEw 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAiZadL19ecu
8964 copyright protection587PENANAN1E3QGt3Aa 維尼
「佢唔理我喇,呢幾日都冇返學。」8964 copyright protection587PENANAq9TcZDej5H 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAGeRfOywxs8
8964 copyright protection587PENANAF05vHLNFoy 維尼
(可能佢真係有事?)8964 copyright protection587PENANAcdOkWydDE9 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAbPp3KD7C3b
8964 copyright protection587PENANA4IMTWjhClv 維尼
「之前咪同你講過我應承咗佢睇話劇嘅,」可能因為對象是阿芯,我才放心把話說出口,「其實套話劇本來係佢做主角,但佢無啦啦話唔演。」8964 copyright protection587PENANABXH49ynPK8 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAYcJ7BsaisW
8964 copyright protection587PENANARdarOZoxjy 維尼
一口氣說完後,我才認清了一個事實——原來我真的很想找人傾訴。8964 copyright protection587PENANA7YV5Vvfxvz 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAYM2GLfRFPp
8964 copyright protection587PENANAyqrAsRQVqB 維尼
她拉開椅子,邀請我一同坐下,好像預知到接下來我會說很久似的。8964 copyright protection587PENANAVZ8IeSWDjB 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAkQNEYh90Pi
8964 copyright protection587PENANAjQY51X2gLY 維尼
「然後佢同帶隊老師講叫我嚟演……」8964 copyright protection587PENANAm4XBvLUQht 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAbUdYNSKyeh
8964 copyright protection587PENANAf2xrIcBB1D 維尼
「其實今日學校唔係放假,只係我驚到唔敢返學。」8964 copyright protection587PENANA44yWXYEJjL 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAUq38QBEtK9
8964 copyright protection587PENANATCOx62BwQx 維尼
她忽然在外套拿出一本簿,然後在上面寫道:8964 copyright protection587PENANAUVY4dAUaiX 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAFxVeHOXMOi
8964 copyright protection587PENANAyESCtTF3V7 維尼
『點解你會驚?』8964 copyright protection587PENANA9ZvqL8i7iu 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAplHM3rR9m5
8964 copyright protection587PENANAriTwsa4q1a 維尼
我無奈笑說:「……因為我唔想上台,我唔敢喺咁多人面前演。」8964 copyright protection587PENANAzS0oA1o1J5 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA2eKTYqPGHe
8964 copyright protection587PENANAX8a1XxNNoA 維尼
她繼續寫下:8964 copyright protection587PENANAUg7lWaexFB 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAdLNy1ghiv4
8964 copyright protection587PENANAvxt1dqnqnl 維尼
『好小事啫,唔使唔返學掛?』8964 copyright protection587PENANAMpSEfzu6O5 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAXEj0As6bcb
8964 copyright protection587PENANAicJm3J5iAl 維尼
「你唔明架喇,呢件唔係小事……」這是影響了我的日常生活整整十七年的事。8964 copyright protection587PENANAtB8i6IRSmn 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAFzKzYbm159
8964 copyright protection587PENANAOjh8YgVFeh 維尼
『可唔可以話比我知架?』8964 copyright protection587PENANANHoMSrFeVD 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA6yUO1ilA91
8964 copyright protection587PENANAHvXWEWxdil 維尼
我喝了她給的芒果汁,內心好像變得前所未有般平靜,彷彿能把一切秘密都說出口……8964 copyright protection587PENANA7QhJTCsYmU 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA2e8sgzcH8w
8964 copyright protection587PENANAK365IcFOCA 維尼
「可以。」8964 copyright protection587PENANAmFe0Cimo7d 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAYZa66oEYq6
8964 copyright protection587PENANAsXnPurV8FF 維尼
她放下手中的筆,靜待我把話接下去。8964 copyright protection587PENANAwKwDjHr1X4 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAYtjK3cWlQB
8964 copyright protection587PENANAPLSxkHTEoR 維尼
「我有病,個病令我唔可以同其他人講嘢。」我帶著稍微顫抖的聲線,逐字逐字的吐出來。8964 copyright protection587PENANAe1xKhmhj72 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAb3f86OCTLi
8964 copyright protection587PENANAQP64Sp7mSG 維尼
『係咩病?』8964 copyright protection587PENANAijNVgUIOHM 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAzCYyI6Uq53
8964 copyright protection587PENANAx4hEpywoub 維尼
我接過她的筆,在紙上寫下那隻怪獸的全名:8964 copyright protection587PENANAuzQnoRVi1j 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAqhOm0dYrqa
8964 copyright protection587PENANA5XY3QN8dAv 維尼
『 選 擇 性 緘 默 症 』8964 copyright protection587PENANAjThHVjTHRe 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAK6EYSl4Gz8
8964 copyright protection587PENANAzBjGDIltHn 維尼
她想了一會,又寫道:8964 copyright protection587PENANAkC3WGAUxuj 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAsuoeMGSjgi
8964 copyright protection587PENANAfwIqt9DUJx 維尼
『你意思係呢個病令你喺其他人面前講唔到野?』8964 copyright protection587PENANAWZzBc36KZd 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAn0dVT8yhdF
8964 copyright protection587PENANAjySjyBUclc 維尼
「係,我淨係對住我阿婆先講到。」8964 copyright protection587PENANAhHC9Ps4fkT 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAITwwfhbMf9
8964 copyright protection587PENANAcSvPGo1bEu 維尼
『咁你對住其他人嘅時候,具體係點嘅感覺?』8964 copyright protection587PENANAvg2CmBSYDQ 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA6LwM7EKEkD
8964 copyright protection587PENANAadhm6G3OUU 維尼
「……我會講唔出。」8964 copyright protection587PENANA1qffZOzDC3 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA1jLvzDzAYA
8964 copyright protection587PENANAYfh69JuJkH 維尼
她側著頭,似乎不理解我的意思。8964 copyright protection587PENANAbNCqXBrGBL 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANApNrvgTckdo
8964 copyright protection587PENANAly7ghr9lW4 維尼
「例如火燭嘅話,我會叫唔到救命。」平常的話我一定不會對人說,說了只會讓人笑話。8964 copyright protection587PENANAecMdukGnC1 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAkbgcA37D9H
8964 copyright protection587PENANAK33pGfxLIB 維尼
「同人基本打招呼我都有問題。」8964 copyright protection587PENANAHQMMAyWCOU 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAa5hc0015ll
8964 copyright protection587PENANALH4eDlo2Du 維尼
『但你平時同我打招呼冇問題喎?』8964 copyright protection587PENANAzwuaRKKcpM 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA61nSKl8taO
8964 copyright protection587PENANAQ7Cu1FEj90 維尼
「因為我冇以前咁嚴重。」8964 copyright protection587PENANAQStpzwHM4g 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAWHh5QNyRfI
8964 copyright protection587PENANAU0v0hIz3Z8 維尼
『聽唔聽我以前嘅事?』8964 copyright protection587PENANA7hnZtc5G5h 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAet2jQ96p2u
8964 copyright protection587PENANADimVTNR6KJ 維尼
我點頭,她便開始寫,寫了數分鐘才停下來:8964 copyright protection587PENANA8w5ZKwxcW6 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAo9qjJXIRDW
8964 copyright protection587PENANAxMw1zuS5FS 維尼
『我以前都可以好似其他人咁開口講野,10幾年前我做完一場手術之後先變到而家咁。』8964 copyright protection587PENANAJx19zLcKgU 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAmdDviwOATT
8964 copyright protection587PENANAO3R3X9d1BB 維尼
『唔好睇我咁樣,其實我以前好鍾意講野架,我老公仲嫌我多野講到有啲煩。』8964 copyright protection587PENANAQjdfc0fFgS 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAao9gqicR41
8964 copyright protection587PENANAPjQz2w4NNa 維尼
『所以一開始我都好唔習慣,慢慢仲鬱咗個病出嚟。』8964 copyright protection587PENANAeUz3oC8pQp 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA1l3dBl32vY
8964 copyright protection587PENANAcAvTVudYpy 維尼
『後尾雖然學咗用手語或者寫字同人溝通,但嗰種感覺始終冇親口講咁痛快。』8964 copyright protection587PENANAR9aVPhmsks 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANADrFxg79xLW
8964 copyright protection587PENANARRc22Mc1Co 維尼
我不明白她這番話的意思,一臉疑惑地望著她。8964 copyright protection587PENANAbpQFP4bJgR 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAMen9Hnw7PE
8964 copyright protection587PENANARgJ2tLw7CP 維尼
『我想講,可以用自己把聲講出心入面嘅諗法係一件好幸福嘅事。』8964 copyright protection587PENANA310ejRgGCA 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANApG4aaneFlg
8964 copyright protection587PENANAiM1FLrD0V5 維尼
看著她以文字交織而成的話語,我開始思考起當中的意義……8964 copyright protection587PENANARaKJw7bmvK 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAUR2mRUppFJ
8964 copyright protection587PENANAjYmSOrOkse 維尼
「但係,有時我覺得自己對住其他人嗰陣係第二把聲嚟,我真正把聲……」說到一半,她示意我停下來。8964 copyright protection587PENANAmwje5SG7bZ 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAglCVxDSyip
8964 copyright protection587PENANAuAvNOg3SVH 維尼
『你頭先明明話對住外婆至講到野,』8964 copyright protection587PENANAQMoKbIXh2z 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAIl1uMDrsdy
8964 copyright protection587PENANArtLJWIepd6 維尼
她握一下筆桿,把下半句寫完:8964 copyright protection587PENANAtas8cAzPkC 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAjvfycBIQC0
8964 copyright protection587PENANAK4eabgU2fz 維尼
『但你咪一直同我講緊野囉,仲講咗好多。』8964 copyright protection587PENANAyOeN3RkZ0N 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAo8nsO6mgiz
8964 copyright protection587PENANAYMaQJVNiM5 維尼
她的說話像一下強而有力的鐘聲般敲進心裡,令我恍然大悟,原來我剛才說了很多嗎……?8964 copyright protection587PENANArGk6wJggpF 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAtuCJFemHIP
8964 copyright protection587PENANAEL0XI8bTFy 維尼
不,答案其實早就知道。8964 copyright protection587PENANA35fUbJxgDi 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAzEcSKVJzZn
8964 copyright protection587PENANABlrbkHkRIY 維尼
我一直以來也說了很多,對星澄、對樂仔、對Cayden 、對Tinny ,還有對其他很多很多人……8964 copyright protection587PENANA8KN1qvXjoT 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANArhdRwHnilf
8964 copyright protection587PENANADacz2Ln2TC 維尼
只是我自己不願承認而已。8964 copyright protection587PENANAOPTyX2yGX6 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAHvR7Yf4pnt
8964 copyright protection587PENANAbyWVWO4bOw 維尼
『冇錯,你細個嗰陣可能真係好嚴重,但其實你個病一早開始好返,至少我覺得係咁,唔係咩?』8964 copyright protection587PENANAh3Y6NR4NkE 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAAMLHlPH2b8
8964 copyright protection587PENANARjEwlivUiQ 維尼
她一語道出這個連我自己也不知道,又或者早就知道了,卻一直用來當擋箭牌的事實。8964 copyright protection587PENANA0tVqcLeolM 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAz3qzvu1IYi
8964 copyright protection587PENANATcWyYC6fo3 維尼
為甚麼我由始而終都不肯面對……?8964 copyright protection587PENANAeGIai9FRBZ 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAuUZRMtaX6m
8964 copyright protection587PENANAKR0Fjj4Vg1 維尼
『你覺得自己同人講唔到野,所以你更加將所有野都推落個病度,去合理化自己嘅沉默。』8964 copyright protection587PENANAnMxzHPo2dT 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAYsixhQFhZA
8964 copyright protection587PENANAcz2KDB1Hxc 維尼
我低著頭,不敢說半句話,就像一個等待責罰的小學生般。8964 copyright protection587PENANAPHVVAbrJ7e 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAPfDLBq1hun
8964 copyright protection587PENANApI44I9HhKq 維尼
『點呀?講中咗?』8964 copyright protection587PENANAiqnd3Eg0rk 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAMtOEYlASB3
8964 copyright protection587PENANAkd4ex3YlSB 維尼
對,一直以來,我認為心裡的房間被那隻怪獸上了一道鎖,令任何人也不能走進來,其實那隻怪獸在不知不覺間已經變得弱不禁風,真正把房間上鎖的人是我自己……8964 copyright protection587PENANAjoDNgcOiRw 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAGe8Ko5J1zK
8964 copyright protection587PENANAPhU2HbPswQ 維尼
就在我選擇承認這個事實的瞬間,心裡彷彿傳來一下開鎖的聲音。8964 copyright protection587PENANAHgRSDfVhBn 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA32NI3tBmk8
8964 copyright protection587PENANA9CucNIU9oG 維尼
『把口係用嚟講野架,你唔似我咁已經冇機會。』8964 copyright protection587PENANAtFOzcJrNIn 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAGfxOVdGonX
8964 copyright protection587PENANAebpnLFAkFg 維尼
如此簡單的道理,我竟然到這一刻才明白。8964 copyright protection587PENANAeK8jMkL0m8 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAsYimGpo6wf
8964 copyright protection587PENANARkjN6hJCKx 維尼
『聽完我講之後,你會唔會考慮返學校?』8964 copyright protection587PENANA3TtZzu7Mg0 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAUYu0Q28NVP
8964 copyright protection587PENANAazTMCFtV5r 維尼
她把筆放下來,對我微微一笑。8964 copyright protection587PENANASy8VtaoHkl 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANADxwijLCtkg
8964 copyright protection587PENANAZzoyr6t58y 維尼
我望望牆上的時鐘,現在是下午十二時二十分。8964 copyright protection587PENANAFq7hZgIdaO 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA3PNKUgtlVs
8964 copyright protection587PENANAcndRefwVVv 維尼
有時踏出第一步後,所有事情或許都會變得很簡單,只是我一直在猶豫、一直在逃避,才會停滯不前——8964 copyright protection587PENANA2orDO0swaz 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA3WRzCanpLM
8964 copyright protection587PENANAyr2Kj3JjD0 維尼
「其實,我係一個好鍾意講野嘅人。」我答非所問,沒甚麼特別理由,只是把一句收藏已久的心聲說出來。8964 copyright protection587PENANA1WcyoGM1SY 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANA3ziV3vOyzH
8964 copyright protection587PENANAac3HMNZZuO 維尼
她笑得更燦爛,以手語表示:8964 copyright protection587PENANAbUUqBvrMgE 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAM5exAmgdZu
8964 copyright protection587PENANAQDJyPmNTcF 維尼
(我都係呀。)8964 copyright protection587PENANAu4MEFxxhVf 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAoIcOVGoOU5
8964 copyright protection587PENANAOix0EYisaU 維尼
我想了一會,以手語做了一個「謝謝」的手勢。8964 copyright protection587PENANA3TTr5lKIwU 維尼
591Please respect copyright.PENANAMFBJy2V1Rf
8964 copyright protection587PENANAvIVCqyYJQz 維尼
外婆說過阿芯有點像我的母親,我想現在知道為甚麼了,或許和母親訴心事的感覺就是如此,她的一字一句把從很久以前就在裝睡的我「喚醒」了;也提醒我或許是時候要嘗試從房間裡踏出來了。8964 copyright protection587PENANAK6TiX4uI23 維尼
216.73.216.7
ns216.73.216.7da2