x
天亮，上班。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡicouBjmIkC
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU7do50NzPs
擠進人山人海的車廂，心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物，我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟，好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ14JGb7SEe4
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDsGRNldtlf
車廂一如往常，平穩中帶輕微搖晃，教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲，繼續進食，令人側目。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCTBi2JlJyw
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTMoNDIwe5F
食物的細碎，像沙子一樣，在人們毫不注意的情況下，悄然掉在地上，再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站，人們再肆意加以踐踏，令碎粉再度粉碎。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9YTYxpTBcd
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmiTrbl2ykt
到站了，我有意無意地繞過人羣，「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉，心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上，我回頭望進車廂，想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉，但列車經已開駛。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf4xR6ajDZS
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡokcSjRvEs2
看不見，罷。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtcGhc4mbo7
天黑，下班。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS82Ky5VDSv
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJEG8qTRrb0
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂，繼續講上司的壞話。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv53HAk4Eul
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm60FUq6poS
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWLF12qFc54
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrqkIjqAalU
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不！有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰？我看不見……我不想看見……266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ26GZImmHvX
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdHo7zjvq4O
「啪」的一聲，男同事一手拍在我的小腿上，那隻螞蟻——扁了。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIbxjwqXqPm
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEu7P72XU22
「沒事了！」他笑了笑，問我：「你很怕小昆蟲？」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpoQAsdtBK1
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOL0RNXABHX
「不，只是怕蟻。」我感覺到，我的唇還在顫抖，但卻仍勉力一笑。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJfLszj65z5
公司，午飯時間。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsTbPI15ZQu
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnWN6Rcln4a
甲小姐正在上網看劇；乙先生在打盹；丙小姐外出吃飯去；丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒；戊小姐……266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLe2boBaF3r
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj5xDRiyCay
看著同事們的百態，我突然覺得自己和他們一樣，都是很渺小的生命體，小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事，尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌，不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎？那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別？266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FbcaEZbu6
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzoj6nJkK7N
驀地，我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過，卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上，讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失，我感到自己也消失了似的。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTplcZrAvPY
其實，真正的我只是一隻螞蟻，不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己變成人類，過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活，是有目的的付出，有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑，多奢侈！無他，這就是意義。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ06TNd9Up26
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlrZs9gMTdE
還是……266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡalbIoAsZzm
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaQDI2WEZ31
其實，真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己是一隻蟻，過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味，只懂一味尋找食物。無他，這就是生存！266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRAMKVxMcer
公司，工作。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡL7kW633997
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZmhQupyxZ4
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD1Q2tSh0am
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKTbPh7CQoV
大家心知犯錯的不是我，奈何人是怕事的，只好把我推上斷頭台。事後，一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqSozBi5e15
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxJHxmb5nRZ
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxAxoQUPp52
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt8OBdcozQU
剛巧，一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGL74SzprRv
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3e6UzfwcWz
快意，笑了。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzmKM6fPAj4
酒吧，喝酒。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlS4kc6VKAn
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZDnJBQYZf
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎？為何現在也怕酒起來？」男同事笑問。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8DAtUkMGn
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAHXtmb576x
「其實，我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cAPsqgx8F
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJzncA2DGiM
「還是……你根本不會喝酒？」他哈哈大笑。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDkknaIeDU0
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRci2YT2Ewk
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲，我突然變得不大抗拒，乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfmAjcEAW3Y
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvt9Wp2Mq3C
醉倒。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmByKZ9Kq5B
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuS9TwiQ61X
迷糊間，我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體，不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲，想要到它的洞穴去……266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrq08RS5SS9
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwNBkIbj0cp
「上天取走你的一扇門，定會留給你一扇窗。」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7av9vmE1Ve
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2u036Iq9I
今趟，上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdK2pdomXrB
假期，醫院。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwL5ntX6rv
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLTgHbo6S3w
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病，還未明確，因為報告要待下星期才會完成。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2u36UZPQtq
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgbkxDsSu28
看見媽的時候，家中各人都是淚眼漣漣，很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTPF2HE5Adq
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX2gKzMs65D
「我覺得……」近幾天，媽的話都變得斷斷續續：「自己……」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbjauv1Yf97
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgIP8EbGqi4
大家都屏息靜氣，深怕這是她的最後一句話。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLT5DB46FRE
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpNlLYUJ814
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音，輕如柔絲，但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ21HUcjWFry
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2Ux01FifRR
死寂。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjM5Ry3AWTx
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtsFIx86Z4e
出乎我意料，這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話，不論是肉體還是心靈上。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDOorhdqXkF
回家，晚飯。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7YOE1U8kp4
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ47t5FdWs94
一枱六椅，異常的沉默。電視的聲浪，掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意，繼續吃。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQulO3WffXf
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡORVSZJaYBL
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子：「不如外出吃飯。」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPkHOH9huDn
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsoedJXLsMh
妹放下筷子衝進房內，甩門；姨低下頭來，但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見；婆呆了，眼眶紅潤；我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTJgacTgaRr
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlgT1CdqsK4
我心想：世界末日來臨後，地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻？266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoehOnFdMWG
每次望著媽，心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣，彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnkesGcoWF7
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4oPektUCs
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑！就是因為她是一隻螞蟻，所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭，去減輕她的負擔。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwtrRZm55By
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4pW2gkDvUN
久而久之，我每次一見到她，便會掉頭走。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUxFz4M4Vjh
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRqbJ6sfpzh
但我知道，我永沒能走遠。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKJy6Dl7QM2
男友家，床上。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg3pZw8UIoZ
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcMUyWWl1WE
前奏後，男友進入極度興奮狀態，沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時，我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCUQD9wZZe
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxjJSunVsuD
産房內有一張床，床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了，是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示，她要生産了。不消一會，整張床上都是幼蟻，恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTetEEljuSV
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ37WYCk88nA
我驚恐萬分之際，耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音：「他朝君體也相同！」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9tXRmYvwaD
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy0N21yOrSG
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮，於是更用力……266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSXd3XB3qvX
舊生聚會，內地某酒家。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZtgj0NZqjh
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe5zUHSbfTw
說也奇怪，舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意，說會給我們驚喜。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdizRSXEdNw
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1k5pL6X5Ns
「蟻宴？」我呆了，但逃不了。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmqJTdYvPVC
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqw1PTeOdNt
「你有收看《天與地》嗎？」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYeq0XweErD
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwJ2xrJzXLa
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼！」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE9nEcXx13z
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPKxoM54Uas
「結局何如？」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvIUFHz2sZf
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWszI1hTcav
「沒好下場！」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUjt6EMo7wj
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGbGIZCqjEX
「對！沒好下場！」我在心裡重覆著，衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwyw2vtotFw
男友有很多恐怖的寵物：蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時，他都會放一些寵物在床邊，以增加他的性趣。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7ECKujkSXw
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡba73S5qOOh
今趟，床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後，我不經意的問道：「你的寵物呢？」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWSWAj00bIJ
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ34aQFxJCAG
「在你體內。」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQLTiHKsv9g
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJV2CJmk2wo
「甚麼？」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡABsY5S3buf
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkM2Rs2CsLA
「蟻。」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYYDXxoOXEW
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdEPBYXNv8h
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwe998AZilg
它平常會做甚麼？做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯，它會做的事真的很多，但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活！它最好立刻消失！266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuSOwkvly8e
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbyZAnoBkc1
結果，我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS9DdEl7Et8
靈堂上，我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBsKOfLGIq
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCwJTIUhRxF
「她真的死了嗎？」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊，但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1EAZzy7gPR
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUfYsZVkOFw
「誰？」另一聲音反問。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHzqroeXfqH
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs8pWL0YFJe
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道：「她……」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZUonufVpr
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8RRC9mpyNU
靜。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuz8Rmy4pBh
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ddDbbH8k9
我回過神來，低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDsfjoVTCer
我：「我的耳朵有毛病嗎？為何會聽到螞蟻講話？」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbNPNxzTaKb
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWkdYlj9fNv
醫：「不。是你的壓力過大，導致有幻聽。」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb3SHQj116I
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ10msxhWzOY
我：「我有精神病？」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEp67mhNofj
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq3Quzw4t4P
醫：「是情緒病。」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPRCHb52E2M
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF36QNVx4aM
我：「怎麼辦？」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN7616IVfQA
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡspLna1aQxN
醫：「我會處方一些藥物，你要按時服用；另外，你也要多休息……」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcWkoqMPAM3
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiTt70rUXVG
我：「謝謝醫生。」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMIQ1eTWYx9
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvz6sfPihnN
醫：「不用謝。」266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgk4r0Uwo89
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7fRLHNzcr2
離開診所時，我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH7TeaGpbQf
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjeSSDx9Xvr
不，我走近細看，是「虫馬虫義」專科。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeejCE5iES0
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻？266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsHQ75tGW83
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl4OWSlHJz4
醫生替我作身體檢查，一切正常；266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJKa55asYQY
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBcaJqU3I1R
男友向我解釋，螞蟻之說，純粹幽默；266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG8ML6ISs4K
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3gwb1gWWCK
同事都勸我休息，減少工作量；266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiEtUV3NVNP
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg9OsTnOOg7
……266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWhv7IvElgy
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmCRVEw0Ap0
「真的有蟻在我體內！」我尖叫，奪門而出，從天台一躍而下，肝腦塗地。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZWcRIkhAtm
266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsujjq0jzqR
臨死前，我看見那東西了——不是蟻，是……
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》。若此舉違規，煩請創挑主通知，願刪文。266Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNeBpobQLIx
