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秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxlivktfxe1
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcJfx1w3nyy
「完好？」現在的她問。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhaem4dEXYn
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYY35Ug2Kn0
「無缺？」曾經的他問。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvuTBJwciq
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLm5F2sav1P
很多人說他生活美滿。家境富裕，頭腦聰明，五官英氣，身材高大。聞言他總是假笑，笑對方客氣得過份。奈何對方從未察覺他的笑容雖假，情感卻是真實而強烈的：他的確認為對方很過份。他想要的從不是這種生活，可惜每次對此表示厭棄時，總有人批評他不知足。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1a0rCQKgYJ
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv0Fquj1LGK
輕嘆一聲，繼續前行。踏踏踏，沙沙沙，聲聲撕心裂肺。像父母的哭罵，令人痛，也令人愧疚不安。無論他們如何呼天搶地，他終究永遠不會回來。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQlnA3YueGW
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ51C2ZbrHEw
遷入新居，展開新生。吃力，困難。已然表達得很清楚，對方還是假裝不知該使用哪個稱謂。有人說不介意，有人說很平常，話題和目光卻只停留在胯下之物。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGy15FUsin0
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtvlSHyEQso
無處訴說的孤獨日夜縈繞不散。曾發誓永不後悔，曾以為自己是多麼堅毅勇敢，曾相信世界其實不是那麼單一而絕情……216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡewvTGeWqWC
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8fZ3mCW00p
步出公園，拐了幾個街口，來到醫院門前。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡST2oFzQMfb
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9FhDYJrPtr
「醫生，早晨。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡesl5o6EAZd
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZZpn73iVN
「早晨。近來身體好嗎？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3WM4A4Mw5A
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1SexrgPj7G
「好……不過……」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRZwy0SmAOh
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1GWrKMBEec
「不過甚麼？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡadyRFnAwIb
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtskuQbVbMP
「我想再做手術。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsyeRTMQlIb
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡovhls8yn8m
「為甚麼？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYQ5iK3hPnZ
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1FfCTdH8qg
「不適應現在的生活。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPyU4ug5M4F
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzRkH72VVJI
「不適應身體的變化或是有其他困難？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYutFBQNxjU
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsv5ZFzwWrf
「是生活上的困難……其實我很滿意現在的身體，我覺得這才是真正的自己！過往的我根本不是我！可惜旁人都不是這麼認為……」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLtyw89rqlL
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdjUMlv0kiW
「所以你想要回以前的性別？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIyjb5GYlvX
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVI3maePqP0
「不——我是不想要任何性別。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEb5I93lQhD
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOZp5UaGEfz
「噢……抱歉我還未能捕捉到你的思路。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmBRjXFTWzk
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW9eJIkcw7e
「這些日子，我遇到的問題大都源於旁人無法定徹底認同我是男或女。如果我沒有特定性別，可以在『男』、『女』、『跨性別』、『無性別』幾個類別之間遊走，可能會更自由！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl9AOMTmxl7
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBl9GUYjS8N
「依我看來，你再次做手術之後，將要面對的問題會更多更嚴重。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZp3kcjxJ7E
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJoluR9Xsew
「我理解你的意思，但我還是想要放手一搏——我堅信每次改變都會帶來新的可能、新的希望。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeACVjlLzz6
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZg1fFSrz3a
「既然你堅持，我會按程序寫信轉介你去心理輔導部門作專業評估。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTuQ5InfFMu
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4YNruw7Pq0
「謝謝你。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk7587m7lrR
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ROh9s4zpx
跟醫生多聊一會後，她步出醫院，再次走經公園。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAtZWskGnwU
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJZTo2ihOUM
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmliDsGe0l
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnliQDsPQHH
「以前未完好。」現在的她說。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH35n1wo3HB
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXbUWrx35p0
「將來會無缺。」曾經的他說。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjmy9qsjJTM
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu4VxA2NPb7
她笑了，笑自己傻，笑自己依然沉浸在幻想世界當中，相信自己的人生將來一定會變得完好無缺。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnM3YSKL1hm
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡigb3s6ymdH
明知無人能斷言明天一定會更好。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62ZJb0qAV6
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwrLN6NkhKg
奈何人總需要一個努力的原因、一個繼續活下去的原因。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3eDoCZKDL3
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡih82zmxqKs
那個原因名為「希望」。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFpSRTYLRCF
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlufV1I9EII
「我定要繼續努力。」現在的她說。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqYkcAstkB8
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBGiOpuCKtb
「好好活下去吧。」曾經的他說。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmVX5cJcoj
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1yrOs1JcTv
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNpjUJAFhBX
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3twmB4VzpW
她慢步於公園大道，放眼欣賞沿路風景，不再留意地上的枯葉。
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》
ns216.73.216.8da2
